ASK A LUCHADOR IV
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The cameras are rolling but the screen is black. The lights switch on and the picture if filled with the face and mask of La Flama Blanca. He has a smile on his face.
La Flama Blanca: Welcome to another episode of “Ask A Luchador” hosted by The Luchador himself, La Flama Blanca. It’s good to be here, it’s good to be back.
The camera pans out to get a full shot of La Flama Blanca in his theatre room on his leather couch. He presses the switch on the side to recline back.
La Flama Blanca: Yeah buddy. Tonight’s show is sponsored by Smith and Forge’s Hard Cider. Honestly one of the best ciders around. Pick some up and watch the UTA. Follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook. On to the show. First question, Voice Over Guy!
Voice Over: Michael from New Orleans, Louisiana wants to know, What did you really do in Mexico?
La Flama Blanca: I did some stuff. Then some more stuff. I went home. Took a breather from the chaos. With a clear mind and the drive, I’m back in the mix. Listo para patear algún culo.
The Luchador grabs his water of the table and takes a sip.
Voice Over: This one comes from south of the boarder… Marta from Mexico City, Mexico wants to know, Un humo y un panqueque o un objeto contundente y una galleta?
La Flama Blanca: Una pipa de agua y un blintz. Siguiente pregunta.
Voice Over: Timothy from Denver, Colorado wants to know, Do you think my POG collection is worth any money?
La Flama Blanca: No, next question.
Voice Over: Faith from Vancouver, Canada wants to know, Who would you rather save from drowning: CBR or Perfection?
La Flama Blanca: Trick question. I wouldn’t save either of them. On that note time for our Did You Know Fact of the Day. Did you know that a Canadian man caught at the U.S. border attempted to smuggle Fifty One live turtles into Canada by stashing them all in his pants? No, no I did not. Okay on with the questions. Next.
: Ariana from Phily wants to know, What is your favorite drinking game?
La Flama Blanca: I enjoy playing “Asshole", I love ripping the “Asshole" apart… wait. Moving on, next question.
Voice Over: Ray from Austin, Texas wants to know, What are your thoughts on the current landscape of the UTA?
La Flama Blanca: I look forward to the future. I see mine being bright and keeping active in the UTA. The UTA gave me a shot and wants me to be here. I want to stay here for a long, long time. Yo no voy a ninguna parte.
Voice Over: Alex from Tampa, Florida asks, La Flama Blanca, I’m really good at Magic The Gathering and have thought of entering tournaments with hopes of being a professional. Any advice?
La Flama Blanca: They have tournaments for Magic Cards? Really? Next thing you’re going to tell me is they have sponsorships… THEY DO?! HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE? I’m about to lose it. Thanks for all the questions. Until next time, haste la vista.
The Luchador gets up from his leather couch and tries to take his mic and pack off.
La Flama Blanca: That’s some b.s. Getting paid money to play Magic professionally. Loco. Goddamn white people.