You open the DVD of WARPEDLive! #7 - "First Reign" and enter it into your favorite DVD player. The sounds of "Pogo" by Digitalism play as the WARPED Wrestling logo floats down from the top to the middle of the screen. Underneath that fades in to words "Play DVD". You click... and the show begins.
The show fades in as we see "South Philadelphia, PA - June 13, 2010" on the bottom right of the screen.
A voice is heard, and is that of Crowbar. He's none too pleased.
Crowbar: I'm sick and tired of this shit, i've done enough anger management to supply an entire army!
Crowbar: So what?! No, no more, you hear me? I'm getting fed up! You're turning me into an absolute jobber because i can't be my normal self! Is that what you're trying to do!?
Crowbar: You'll WHAT?! Fuck you Joey, fuck you. I'm out of here!
Crowbar exits the office and has a camera shoved in his face.
"Headstrong" by Trapt hits the sound system in the world famous Arena in Philadelphia as the President of WARPED Wrestling makes his way out. Joey Matthew, wearing blue jeans, a white t-shirt, and a black leather jacket, along with a black bandana on his head, makes his way toward the ring to a solid amount of cheers from the hardcore crowd.
Randy Long: "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the President of WARPED - Joey Matthewwww!"
Matthew smiles as the crowd applauds as he enters into the ring. He nods at Randy Long and takes the microphone from him and Long exits the ring. The music dies down and Joey holds the microphone up to speak.
Joey Matthew: "Philly fans, how the hell are ya?!"
The sold out former ECW Arena cheers loudly.
Joey Matthew: "That's what I wanna hear. Now, I won't bore you with nonsense like you might see from other wrestling companies out there where the boss comes out and gives a long-winded speech about how happy he is that the company is where it is, about how thrilled he is that the fed just crowned its first champions and SwitchBlade's first title defense will be against The Rough Ryder or how excited I am that we have our first sold out venue right here in Philadelphia..."
The crowd erupts in cheers. Joey smiles. That's what he expected...
Joey Matthew: "No, no, I won't do that. Instead, allow me to introduce to you the man who you've all been behind since day one when he debuted here in WARPED, he is the brand spankin' new WARPED Champion, ladies and gentlemen - this is SwitchBlade!"
“Lost My Way” by Finger Eleven plays as the crowd goes crazy. SwitchBlade walks out from behind the curtain with the WARPED Heavyweight title placed on his right shoulder. He makes his way to the ring and high fives a few fans on the way. Once SwitchBlade reaches the ring he grabs hold of the ropes and pulls himself up on the apron. He looks around at the crowd and points at them. Joey claps for SwitchBlade the whole time. After taking it all in SwitchBlade finally enters the ring, goes over to Joey, and the two shake hands. Joey then hands SwitchBlade the mic. The champ takes a minute to bask in the spotlight as the fans start chanting his name. When it dies down, SwitchBlade begins his speech.
SwitchBlade: Wow…you guys are amazing!
The crowd cheers of course.
SwitchBlade: I still can’t believe this is really happening. It feels like a dream. But here I am with the heavyweight title around my shoulder once again. And I know I could not have done it without the support of each and every one of you. So thank you, WARPED fans!
A “thank you SwitchBlade” chant starts, and Switchy can’t help but grin at that. He then turns to Joey again.
SwitchBlade: And thank you Joey, for giving me the opportunity to entertain the fans every week, and for running one of the greatest wrestling federations out there.
Joey nods in appreciation.
SwitchBlade: Finally, I want to thank my opponents, Mr. Rottentreats…and Rough Ryder.
The crowd boos upon hearing his name. SwitchBlade gestures for them to settle down.
SwitchBlade: Now personally, I can’t stand those guys. But professionally, they’re two of the best in this industry, and they gave me the fight of my life! It was by far one of the greatest matches I have ever been a part of, and the rest of the roster could learn a thing or two from them.
SwitchBlade paces a little bit before moving on.
SwitchBlade: As heavyweight champion, I have become the alpha dog. That means that everybody will paint a target on me, and I’m going to have myself a very busy schedule. But that’s just fine with me; I enjoy the competition. And I promise to you Joey, and to the WARPED fans out there, that I will be a fighting champion. Everyone who fights their way to the top WILL get a shot at my title, but I guarantee you that it will not be easy. Everyone needs to step up if they want this belt, and if any of you think that-
Suddenly SwitchBlade is cutoff.
The Rough Ryder: That we deserve a shot at your title?
Everyone looks up to the entrance ramp to see The Rough Ryder in his wrestling gear and sunglasses come out accompanied by Jessica Reyes, and of course with his steel chair in hand. He begins to head towards the ring but still talking.
The Rough Ryder: Well consider me contestant number one to ‘come on down’ SwitchBlade, because we all sure as hell know that I’m the only one on this pathetic roster who deserves a shot at that title.
Ryder slides his chair into the ring and rolls in, grabbing it on the way up. Jessica Reyes follows shortly behind.
The Rough Ryder: If you dare deny this then all you’re doing Switch is lying to yourself. Because you, all these people, and even you Joey know DAMN well that if it wasn’t for that little gang banger Malik that I’d be standing here with that title around my shoulder.
SwitchBlade: Can you really blame Malik for what he did? Considering, you know, you cost him his title match fir-
The Rough Ryder: Not you too SwitchBlade, please don’t tell me you’re going to be as big of a mark as all these people. All I did to Malik was prove one thing, and that’s no matter what is around you, like maybe somebody coming out and talking, you need to focus on your match. Maybe next time he’ll remember that.
The fans boo as Ryder moves a little closer to SwitchBlade. Act a Fool by Lil Jon cuts off Ryder as Malik Logan bursts through the curtain looking irate.
Malik Logan: How can you even come out here for one second and act like you didn't do anything wrong at WARPED 6? How can you come out here angry at me for getting into your match when you got Grundy's sasquatch sized foot in my face? Ryder what happened to you was what should've happened. You don't deserve a title shot. Why should you have gotten that shot? What did you do?
The Rough Ryder: What did I do? WHAT DID I DO TO DESRVE THIS!? How about being the first man in this company to pin the dreaded “Rottentreats”?
Malik Logan: OK and I won the first ever WARPED match! So let's do this. Me vs. you at WARPED 8 and the winner will get the title shot against Switchblade! We're going back to what started the feud, what do you say?
The Rough Ryder: Please tell me you’re joking…
Ryder laughs and runs his free hand through his hair.
The Rough Ryder: Do you not remember our past? Why on EARTH would you want to step into the ring with me? I destroyed you in our first match, where YOU made the stipulation, and YOU lost. That’s not enough for you? How about the week where I took you out, and left you in a pool of your own blood? And yet, you come out here again and challenge me?
Ryder shrugs, and looks at Joey.
The Rough Ryder: Book it. I’ll take pride in taking out Hitman again, and then…
Ryder turns and goes face to face with SwitchBlade.
The Rough Ryder: Then I’m coming for you.
Another voice is heard. This time, its none other than the all-black wearing PKA. Shorts-black. Shoes-black. Socks? Off white. Shirt-a black Taking Back Sunday shirt. Headband-black. Guyliner? Also black. His heart? Well..
PKA: "You know what, all of this title shots being thrown around make me sick. That, on top of being here in Philly, I think I'm going to have to be admitted to the ER..."
The crowd in Philly begins a "Shut The Fuck Up!" *clap, clap, clap-clap-clap* chant...PKA grins as he makes his way down the aisle, toward the ring.
PKA: Please. Get over yourselves. Why don't you guys learn how to cheer a winning team, because unlike your beloved Flyers, I win in big situations."
This struck a nerve with the rabid fans as they boo the roof off the place. PKA cautiously steps up the ringsteps and stands on the apron, keeping his eye on the four men in the ring.
PKA: "I was robbed of the Evolution Championship and I still don't know why I wasn't awarded that title at Go Big or Go Home..."
PKA: "Malik Logan, you're a cheater just as much as T.G. Grundy was in that match. SwitchBlade, congratulations on becoming the Heavyweight Champ, but you only won that match because Mr. Rottentreats was injured."
SwitchBlade looks irritated by this comment...
PKA: "Oh, what do we have here...? A pattern of sorts. Two men who both deserved to win a championship at the last show that were ROBBED because of things out of their control, out of OUR...*points to Ryder and himself* control... Joey, do something right for a change, and FIX THIS PROBLEM!"
Another "Shut The Fuck Up!" chant starts up as PKA gets fired up and shouts out for them to take their own damn advice!!! Joey Matthew, WARPED President, holds his hand up for everyone to calm down and he begins to speak. PKA enters the ring and stands beside The Rough Ryder.
Joey Matthew: "First of all, SwitchBlade and T.G. Grundy won their Titles fair and square. That's undisputable. Secondly, you are out of line. You have been since you came to WARPED. But, you want me to fix this? I have the best idea. Tonight, in this very ring, SwitchBlade and Malik Logan will team up once more to take on PKA And The Rough Ryder!"
PKA and The Rough Ryder nod at each other as SwitchBlade and Logan are also pleased. Suddenly, Ryder attacks SwitchBlade with a roaring right hand while PKA superkicks Logan to the mat while the Prez gets out of the ring... PKA gets on top of Logan, hammering away, as Ryder has SwitchBlade in the corner. Suddenly the tide turns as SwitchBlade turns the tables on Ryder and begins drilling him with right hands. SwitchBlade then kicks Ryder in the gut and sends him over the top rope! Meanwhile we have Logan who has gotten the upperhand and backdrops PKA over the ropes right near Ryder! The crowd erupts in cheers as the babyfaces stand tall in the ring and SwitchBlade's music "Lost My Way" by Finger Eleven plays over the sound system. PKA and Ryder backtrack up the aisle as we fade out.
Match #1 - Singles Match: The Midnighter vs. Crowbar
Randy Long: "The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, making his WARPED debut, from Jacksonville, Florida, weighing in at 295 and standing at an impressive 6 foot 8 inches - The Midnighter!"
The lights in the arena go out as "Playa What" plays, the Midnighter enters the arena and taunts with 4 ladies. Blue, white and black lights are flashing all around. The Midnighter gets in the ring and taunts again as he removes his entrance attire.
Tony D: "And there's the newest edition to the WARPED roster, calling himself The Midnighter.. this man is the partying type but it will be no party that he's getting into against Crowbar tonight."
Kris Red: "This guy is cool..."
"Voices" by Rev Theory plays...
Randy Long: "And his opponent, weighing in at 192 pounds, Crowbar!"
Walking out to the top of the ramp (as the first "they talk to me" ends and the music kicks in), Crowbar looks around with a blank look on his face..
Kris Red: "Here comes Mr. Anger Management.."
He walks down the ramp slowly, never keeping his eyes off the ring. Walking up the stairs he stops and looks around at the ground, and gets a slight smirk. Entering the ring he stands on the second rope and looks around before leaning back on the ropes.
Tony D: "Crowbar of course known for his temper and in fact it led to his arrest and probation after an attack on a Radio Station studio and On Air talent... But thanks to our President, Joey Matthew, he's out of jail, free, but has to take Anger Management classes and is on strict probation. He MUST keep his anger under control."
The bell sounds. The match up starts with The Midnighter and Crowbar locking up in the middle of the ring. The Midnighter overpowers Crowbar from the start, and forces him back into the corner. Midnighter steps back, and calls Crowbar out for another hook up. The two hook up again, and The Midnighter again overpowers the lately enraged Crowbar, pushing him into the corner, before withdrawing once more. The Midnighter stands in the middle of the ring with a grin on his face, as Crowbar once again steps out to make the exchange.
Kris Red: "What a cocky grin on the newcomers face.. The Midnighter is big and all but so is Crowbar in his own way and he's known to have a temper."
Tony D: "But a tempher he is forced to restrain from getting out of control...due to the Anger Management classes and probation and all..."
The Midnighter is overpowering Crowbar once more, but Crowbar slips out of his grip, and lays a stiff elbow to the mid section. The Midnighter recovers immediately, and gets in Crowbar's face...who delivers a solid slap to the face of his larger foe. Midnighter stands, momentarily shocked, but then unleashes a devestating right to the face of Crowbar, sending him crashing to the mat. The Midnighter immediately goes to work, pulling Crowbar to his feet, and sending him down again with a stiff right. He pulls Crowbar to his feet once more, and hits a suplex on him into the middle of the ring. Crowbar backs into the corner, and steps up, phased by the initial surge of Midnighter's attack Crowbar exchanges a few heated words with the official.
Tony D: "Crowbar is already heated. He has to keep his composure."
Crowbar takes a breath..turns, and runs into a clothesline from The Midnighter. The Midnighter lays into Crowbar, unleashing rights and lefts to his opponent's face on the mat. He gets off, giving Crowbar some respite, before kneeling over, and kicking him hard in the mid section on the floor. The Midnighter pulls Crowbar up, and hits an Irish whip to the ropes. As he comes back, Midnighter hits a hip toss across the ring. He walks over, and applies an early match sleeper hold, which Crowbar easily rolls out of. Crowbar sidesteps a further right from The Midnighter, before hitting an elbow smash into the side of the head. He follows up with a kick to the mid section and a running jumping clothesline, knocking the big man off his feet. Crowbar gets back up, and hits a monkey toss on Midnighter. He comes off the ropes and goes for a big boot but Midnighter ducks under and rolls up Crowbar for a school boy... 1-2-kick out!
Crowbar gets to his feet and shouts at the referee for his fast count...allowing The Midnighter to further capitalize on his advantage, hitting an elbow smash to the rear of Crowbar's head. The Midnighter now locks in a chin lock. Crowbar's hands grapple with The Midnighter's trying to force him off the move. Eventually, Crowbar has the clarity of mind to put a foot on the rope, allowing for the rope break. The Midnighter remains in control though, whipping Crowbar across the ring, and right back into a bodyslam in the center of the ring. The Midnighter stomps on the fallen body of Crowbar, applying his knee to the back, and stretching it. Crowbar looks to be in considerable pain, as he fights against the move, eventually freeing himself and rolling outside the ring. Crowbar holds onto the ringside barricade, catching his breath as The Midnighter stalks him on the outside. The Midnighter grabs Crowbar's head, and plumets him into the ringsteps. He follows up with an impressive arm bar take down onto the padding outside the ring. Crowbar is lifted back to his feet, and dropped chin first into the steel guardrailing. The Midnighter gets into the ring to break the referee's count, before raising his arms to a small pop from the fans.
Tony D: "The fans have already taken a liking to The Midnighter here in WARPED as he's been very impressive thus far against Crowbar."
Midnighter exits the ring again, heading outside to Crowbar. He grabs Crowbar from behind, but is treated with a heel low blow, that the referee misses, sending the big man down to one knee. The crowd erupts in boos.
Kris Red: "Oooh, and that's why they hate Crowbar there. Well, among other reasons."
Tony D: "A blatant low blow but the referee didn't have his eye on the ball.."
Kris Red: "Heh, either of them..."
Tony D: "Kris!"
Crowbar now rolls The Midnighter into the ring and follows up by climbing onto the apron and entering through the ropes. He drops down and covers, hooking the leg... 1..2.. kick out. Crowbar sends the official an angry look... stands up... gets in his face... and the ref threatens to DQ Crowbar if he doesn't watch it. Not only will Crowbar get DQ'd if he attacks the referee, but he'll get suspended and fined.
Tony D: "Crowbar is like a ticking timebomb. He could go off at any minute here."
Crowbar gets spun around suddenly by Midnighter, kick to the gut, Powerbomb! He goes for the pin...1...2..kickout. The Midnighter hooks the leg this time...1...2..another kickout. Midnighter looks agitated, as he backs up to the ropes. He runs at Crowbar, hitting him with a vicious knee to the face, covering again...1...2...kickout. Midnighter gets back up and sends Crowbar into the corner. He follows through with a running clothesline - wait! Crowbar ducks under, runs to the ropes as Midnighter hits the buckles and stumbles back and right into a huge clothesline at the same time he went to hit Crowbar with one! Both men are DOWN!
Kris Red: "Huzzah!"
The referee starts the 10 count...1....2...both men stir...3...4...Crowbar crawls over to the ropes...5...6...The Midnighter's eyes are open, as he is breathing heavily staring at the rafters...7...8..Crowbar is up, and The Midnighter gets to one knee. Crowbar runs at Midnighter, and hits a running DDT on the larger man. He has the ring sense to lay an arm over Midnighter for the pin...1....2...the big man kicks out, sending Crowbar off him with authority. Both men struggle to their feet, and The Midnighter tries to apply an Armbar on Crowbar, but Crowbar won't allow it. Though, Midnighter is able to apply a headlock. He pulls him back to the corner, and sends him head first into the turnbuckle. The Midnighter turns Crowbar around, and climbs the turnbuckle in front, laying in the rights to Crowbar's face, as the crowd chant to each hit...1....2....3....4....5...6....7...but Crowbar manages to get an arm up, and force the leg of Midnighter up, sending him down to the mat. Crowbar still holds The Midnighter's legs, and slingshots him into the turnbuckle. As The Midnighter blindly scuffles backwards off of the turnbuckle, Crowbar hooks the head and hits a reverse DDT. He climbs back to his feet and lifts The Midnighter to his...he places The Midnighter against the corner, backs up and charges in for a Turnbuckle Spear, and he hits it dead on! He then tries for the brainbuster but can't do it... but tries again.. and holy crap! Brainbuster!!
Kris Red: "Oh snap! That's nearly 300 pounds he just hit the Brainbuster on!!!"
Crowbar covers... 1.... 2... 3!!! The bell sounds and this one's over!
Randy Long: "Here is your winner- Crowbarrr!"
The crowd boos as Crowbar is victorious in this match after hitting The Trapdoor while "Voices" hits the PA System. Crowbar stands on, pleased with his victory as he stares down now at his larger opponent.
We head backstage where we see Kurtis Hyde putting on his elbow pads when suddenly PKA enters the scene, and Hyde gets ready to attack but PKA assures him he can stay calm.
PKA: "Whoa there, hold up. So... I saw what you did at WARPED 6..."
Hyde looks confused...
PKA: "You know... the attack on Theo Davis... man, he's gonna be gone for a long time."
Still, Kurtis Hyde isn't too sure what's going on, or so it'd seem. PKA is referring to a hooded/masked person who made an attack on Theo Davis in his match against Terry Richards at WARPEDLive! #6 - Go Big or Go Home.
PKA: "Look, dude, I saw you after the fact when I was in the back. You took the mask off, you threw the hoodie in the dumpster.. I saw it all."
PKA: "Your secret is safe with me. I know you have your own issues to deal with and your own plans, but right now, I want to offer you something..."
PKA pulls out his wallet and hands a couple bills to Hyde, who takes them and looks up, confused.
Kurtis Hyde: "What's this...?"
PKA: "Take care of Aguila for me. Do what you do best. Eliminate that little punk from my life for good."
Hyde looks down at the money, then up at PKA, and smiles. He nods, and they shake hands.
PKA: "I knew you'd understand. Oh..."
PKA just happened to have a black hoodie tied around his waist. It was difficult to pick out amongst all of the other black clothes he was wearing.
PKA: "You might need this..."
PKA nods at Hyde and steps out of the scene as Hyde smiles with the money in his hand and hoodie over his shoulder..Fade out.
Match #2 - Singles Match: Terry Richards vs. The Mighty Aguila
“Perfect Insanity” by Disturbed blasts through the PA system as the crowd throws out a mixed, mostly negative reaction. Terry Richards comes out, wearing a dark tuxedo, his hair carefully shaved, and he walks down the ramp confidently.
Randy Long: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, ”The Windy City Madman”…Terry Richards!
Some fans are trying to reach out and “tag” Terry’s hand, but Terry gets away from them, with a look of despise in his face. He climbs the steel steps, enters the ring, and gives the crowd a roman salute, which is received nastily. He orders a mic, which is shyly delivered by a stagehand, and starts talking in his trademark raspy voice.
Terry: You know, people…Nearly three weeks ago I signed my contract with WARPED Wrestling. Upon signing such a huge profile, WARPED had in consideration to pet and to spoil me with cares such as fully paid health clause, a good salary, but most of all…They promised RESPECT. Respect, I tell you. But then, I came to this goddamn company, I get to face some Theo Davis? Like, when everyone else is busy with Evolution Title matches, with World Title matches, I get stuck here with some Japanese fluke? Do I have to watch him play the two sides of the fence and kick his damn ass while everyone else gets a chance at gold?! What the hell, is this what WARPED calls respect? Is getting HIGHLIGHTS of the match featured on DVD respect? Is being attacked by some retarded motherscrewer who wears a damn mask respect? ‘Cause I just don’t think so!
The crowd boos. Terry grabs his microphone and throws it right into the ring post, damaging the mic greatly. Terry signals for another mic. The stagehand, confused and intimidated, gives him another microphone.
Terry: See, this stuff isn’t worth the salary! This is just pure DISRESPECT! All of you, you sadistic, pain-enjoying, Richards-embarrassing pukes are guilty!
The crowd reacts very negatively.
Terry: Well, just wanted to remind you empty heads that tonight, I’m facing your little hero, The Mighty Aguila! [Overly sarcastic tone, enhanced with horrible Mexican tone] Ay ay ay, mira, mama, yo puedo volar, yo soy una aguila! El publico me adora! Ellos adoran la aguila! Yipee, yippee! Yo soy un coño! HURRAH!
Terry starts imitating an eagle, spreading his arms wide open and flying around the ring as the crowd boos.
Terry: He’s your hero, isn’t he? You all love Mr. Aguila, don’t you?
The crowd cheers, showing some love for their hero.
Terry: Well, you’ve got to realize, all heroes are disposable! Nothing is perfect, everything is meant to be crappy! That’s why I’m here, to prepare you middle-aged no-dating, no-rocking, worthless pieces of dog shit to stop being nerds addicted to the sport! I’m preparing you bastards for real life!
Terry takes of his tuxedo jacket, grabs a lighter, sets it on fire, puts it back on and imitates The Mighty Aguila once again, but this time on fire.
Kris Red: Is he INSANE?! Haha, ‘cause I love it!
Tony D: I have a bad feeling about this…
Terry: Ay ay ay, estoy en fuego! AYE!
Terry suddenly stops.
Kris Red: HAHA! I’m starting to love this guy!
Terry: See? THIS is how ridiculous your little Eagle looks at home! Because, you see…
The crowd cheers as The Mighty Aguila is already running down the aisle. Terry takes off his tuxedo, still on fire, and throws it into Aguila, who shoves it away promptly… Aguila fires away with right hands, backing Richards into the corner as the bell sounds and this match is underway.
Tony D: "The Mighty Aguila wasn't going to listen to this guy go on anymore!"
Aguila drops Richards in the corner and stomps a mudhole in him. He lifts him up, into the ropes, irish whip... spinning wheel kick takes Richards down! Richards backs up into the corner, begging Aguila off, as Aguila kicks him in the gut and climbs the turnbuckle to deliver the 10-punch. 1... 2... 3... 4... 5... 6... and suddenly someone slides into the ring, hooded, masked, and attacks Aguila!
Tony D: "Wait, what's this?! This guy again???"
He pulls Aguila down and delivers a heavy right hand that takes him down. Meanwhile, Terry Richards looks on, dumbfounded. The masked/hooded person drills away right after right hand on the mat. He brings Aguila to his feet and powerbombs him to the mat! The person then goes to the outside of the ring and looks under the ring apron and meanwhile Terry Richards gets a few stomps in to the fallen Aguila. The masked/hooded man pushes a ladder into the ring..
Tony D: "Again with the ladder?? What's the deal with the ladder???"
Kris Red: "Aguila has to be seeing RED right about now!! This isn't good!"
The masked/hooded man sets the ladder up in the corner and pushes Richards aside and lifts Aguila up into the air and tosses him into the ladder!!
Tony D: "W-wait, what's going on?"
Kris Red: "I'm scared, hold me."
The lights in the arena are out!
Weightless by All Time Low plays over the PA System and the lights come back on simultaneously as the one and only Dr. EMO hits the ring!
Kris Red: "Whoa! Its. Dr. EMO!"
The crowd erupts in cheers as Dr. EMO goes after the masked/hooded man who bails out of the ring just in time. Richards stands there, ready to go, and EMO jumps on him, pounding his head into the mat. Richards escapes and grabs the ropes, pulling himself up. He tries to get out of the ring and EMO grabs him by his tights and pulls him back in and delivers a kick to the gut, then another and another. Dr. EMO then sets him up for the Flipping Piledriver but Richards drops out and rolls under the ropes to ringside, escaping just in time.
Tony D: "We almost saw Terry Richards get drilled with that sick Flip Piledriver, a variation of the PaniK attack!!"
Richards backtracks up the stage while EMO checks on Aguila's condition in the ring, which isn't good. Richards shakes his finger at EMO as he continues to back up toward the curtain.
Kris Red: "Wow, who would've thought tonight we'd see the return of Dr. EMO and that he'd come to the aid of The Mighty Aguila."
Tony D: "No kidding. I sure hope that The Mighty Aguila is all right and one has to wonder if Kurtis Hyde is indeed behind the attack after what we saw with him and PKA earlier tonight..."
Officials hit the ring to check on Aguila as we fade...
A Camera crew begins panning up the hallway ready to catch one of the participants of the next match for a quick interview. Crowbar passes by after his match and smirks at the camera as it passes.
A loud bang is then heard.
The camera crew turn around to see one of their own unconscious on the ground. Theres someone above him. Its Crowbar.
Crowbar looks up at the camera as it cuts off.
Match #3 - Singles Match: Evolution Champion, T.G. Grundy vs. Kurtis Hyde
Our ring announcer, Randy Long, stands in the ring.
Randy Long: "The following is a non-title contest scheduled for one fall...Introducing first, making his in-ring return to WARPED, from New Scotland, weighing in at 224 pounds, Kurtiiiis Hyyyde!"
The spotlgiht shines on the entrance ramp. As it does "Broken Dreams" By Downstait begins to play and out steps Kurtis Hyde. Hyde stops in the middle of the ramp and glares over the booing arena and struts down the rest of the ramp. Hyde ignores the little kids wanting his autograph, Once at the ring he turns to the steps and slowly struts up them walking again slowly across the aipron. He enters the ring and stands in the middle of the ring and awaits his opponent.
Kris Red: "Not so much of a welcome return for Kurtis Hyde as there was for Dr. EMO earlier..."
Randy Long: "And his opponent, standing 6 feet 9 inches, weighing in at 345 pounds, from Columbus, Ohio, this is the NEW Evolution Champion, T..G..Grundyyy!"
As "A Shogun Named" by Clutch hits T.G.Grundy, WARPED Evolution Title over his shoulder, comes running out of from behind the curtain he stops mid stage throws up both arms then jumps up and down a few times the runs to ring. The bell sounds and as T.G. Grundy hands the belt off to the ringside official from in the ring, Kurtis Hyde attacks him from behind with a running clothesline!
Kris Red: "THAT was a smart idea..."
Hyde picks up T.G. Grundy, and hits him with a couple forearm shots He whips him to the ropes, and when he comes running back, Hyde is able to catch him with a hip toss, barely. T.G. Grundy holds his back in pain as he gets up. Hyde kicks him in the gut, and hits him with a swinging neckbreaker. He goes for the pin...1... T.G. Grundy lifts Hyde off of him, and Hyde gets pushed to the edge of the ring.
Tony D: "T.G. Grundy kicks out with FORCE!"
Kris Red: "Welcome back to WARPED, Kurtis Hyde.. meet this big guy.."
T.G. Grundy gets up, and walks towards Hyde. Hyde goes for a left punch to the face, but T.G. Grundy grabs hold of it, and squeezes the hand tightly. Hyde falls on his knees in pain. T.G. Grundy just kicks him in the face for good measure. Hyde still has some fight in him as he pushes himself up off the mat and Grundy hit sthe ropes and returns with MONSTER Lariat~!
He covers and hooks the leg as the referee counts..1...2...3-BARELY a kickout. T.G. Grundy looks at Hyde in anger. He then picks up Hyde, and literally tosses him into a turnbuckle. He runs up to him, and elbows him in the head really hard. He then starts shouldbutting him in the gut multiple times. Hyde stumbles about in the ring, and soon collapses to the floor. The crowd continues to cheer Grundy on as he stands over Kurtis Hyde. Just then, Hyde stands up and pokes the eyes of Grundy as the crowd boos. Hyde looks for a belly to back suplex but Grundy elbows out. Go behind by Grundy... he applies a double ChickenWing and lifts im into the air. When Hyde's body is fully extended, Grundy drops down in a seated position and drops Hyde face-first to the mat!
Tony D: "The Sweet Relief!"
Grundy covers...1 ... 2.... 3!!! The bell sounds and this one is over!
Kris Red: "Sweet relief, something Kurtis Hyde has now that this beatdown and embarassing return match is over with..."
Clutch-"A Shogun Named Marcus" plays as the crowd cheers on T.G. Grundy and the official raises his arm in victory.
Main Event Tag Team Match: Heavyweight Champion, SwitchBlade & Malik Logan vs. The Rough Ryder & PKA
Randy Long: "The following contest is our main event of the evening and it is a tag team match scheduled for one fall! Introducing team number one..."
The arena goes dark and the spotlight shines on the entrance stage, with blue strobe lights mixed in with the white, bright spotlights. From the entrance comes PKA, clothed in black boots, black, baggy jeans, a white tank top wife beater, and a black leather jacket over that. He also wears a black hat, faced backwards, with a long, silver chain around his neck.
Randy Long: "First, from Wichita, Kansas, weighing in at 199 pounds, "Grade A" P..K..A!"
PKA stops on the stage and holds both arms in the air, fists touching, before dropping them to his side and continuing down the ramp. He looks lost, depressed, unhappy, as he walks down the ramp. PKA reaches the steps and walks up, then heads up onto the turnbuckle, and holds both arms out in a crucifix. He surveys the crowd with a look of sorrow on his face, before hopping into the ring from the turnbuckle. He takes off his hat, chain, and leather jacket, and hands it over to the referee who takes it to ringside, and he then leans up against the corner.
Randy Long: "His tag team partner..."
"Show Me A God"- by Tech N9ne hits, and the crowd begins to boo instantly. After a few moments, Jessica Reyes makes her way through the curtain, standing on the small metal ramp. The fans boo her, and she shrugs it off, raising her arms and pointing towards the entrance curtain right as the song in the background blares out "I'm at 99, but I need 100% proof! Show me a God!". When those words are spoken, The Rough Ryder makes his way through the curtain in his wrestling attire, black sunglasses, and a black pleather, sleeveless hoddie. He also carries with him to the ring a black steel chair, with the words "RYDE OR DYE" written on the seat of the chair.
Randy Long: "Being accompanied to the ring by Jessica Reyes, from Portland, Maine, weighing in at 254 pounds, he is the Number One Contender to the WARPED Championship, The Rough...Ryderrr!!!"
He makes his way to the ring lead by Jessica, making sure not to make any contact with the fans, not even eye contact. Jessica walks to the middle of the apron on the floor, meanwhile Ryder climbs the stairs, and makes his way to the middle of the apron above Jessica. He stands there... surveying the crowd, while Jessica just smirks proudly. He passes the chair to Jessica, and takes the glasses and vest off as well, handing it to to Jessica as well and acknowledging PKA in the corner. He then enters the ring, surveying the crowd once more before turning his attention to the entrance curtain, awaiting his opponents.
Randy Long: "And their opponents...first, from Worcester, Massachusetts, weighing in at 220 pounds, Malik "The Hitman" Logannn!"
"Act a Fool" by Lil Jon plays as the crowd goes nuts. Malik "The Hitman" Logan comes out of the curtain and puts his arms in the air to the left, then looks to the right, and the crowd gets pumped. He starts dancing down the ramp and as he makes his way toward the ring while slapping some crowd members hands. He gets in the ring and does JTG's taunts as his music fades.
Randy Long: "And his tag team partner..."
"Lost My Way" by Finger Eleven begins to play...
Randy Long: "From Boston, Massachusetts, weighing in at 192 pounds, he is the WARPED Heavyweight Champion, SwitchBlaaaaade!"
SwitchBlade slowly steps through the curtain to a large number of cheers, WARPED Title around his waist. He is dressed in his usual attire of a black short sleeve shirt with a leather jacket, blue jeans, and black shoes. He also has on his trademark gold belt and sunglasses, but this time also has a necklace with a switchblade pendant on it. Upon making his way to the ring he high fives a few of the fans, and then slides into the ring. He gets up, takes off his sunglasses and necklace and tosses them aside. He takes off the belt and hands it off to someone at ringside then begins chatting with Malik Logan in their corner.
Tony D: "Its time for our main event, a tag team match with the WARPED Champion, SwitchBlade, teaming once again with Malik 'The Hitman' Logan to take on the #1 Contender, The Rough Ryder, and PKA..."
Kris Red: "This is going to be a heavy hitting match, I guarentee you that. Did you feel the tension at the start of the show when all of these men were in the ring? So intense."
The referee of the match, Jack Lawrence, signals for the bell as Malik Logan and The Rough Ryder step up, apparently their team’s choice to start this contest, leaving SwitchBlade and PKA to step to the apron in their respective corners.
Tony D: "And to update the fans on the condition of Mr. Rottentreats, he is said to be out of action for an undetermined amount of time due to an injury suffered at Go Big or Go Home. We will keep you up to date on exactly what's wrong and any further updates on his condition as we get them."
Kris Red: "And if you ask PKA, Mr. Rottentreats would've won that match had he not gotten injured. "
Tony D: "Yeah, right. And PKA would've won the match had he not been knocked out at ringside. He's got more conspiracy theories than Jesse Ventura."
Ryder and Logan lock up in the middle of the ring and they battle for control. Ryder overpowers Logan, backing him into the corner of Logan/PKA. Logan finds himself with his back to the wall and then quickly finds himself with a knee in his gut as Rough Ryder plants one in his midsection. Malik lurches forward only to be straightened right back up with a chop across his chest brining the requisite ‘Wooo’ from the crowd!
Tony D: “Fast start by Ryder!”
Rough Ryder unloads with two more quick chops and the fans continue to sing along with a chorus of ‘Wooos’! Yet another chop connects and something in Malik snaps, he grabs Ryder and reverses their positions putting Rough Ryder in the corner. Malik unloads with some chops of his own, moving so fast that the crowd can’t even ‘Wooo’ fast enough to answer every chop. Malik then grabs Rough Ryder by the head and jerks him from the corner, dropping him face first on the mat with a sloppy bulldog.
Tony D: "Whoa, that didn't go so well, but nonetheless it worked!"
Kris Red: "Malik, ya might wanna work on that bulldog, buddy..."
Malik makes a quick tag to the WARPED Champion SwitchBlade and both men jerk Ryder up. A double Irish whip quickly sends Ryder for a ride and SwitchBlade and Malik link hands, ready to lay Ryder out with a double clothesline on the rebound... Ryder bounces back and manages to duck arms of the WARPED Champ and The Hitman, hitting the far ropes and heading right back at them. As SwitchBlade and Malik turn they are met by a flying double clothesline from Ryder which finds its mark and sends all three men to the mat!
Tony D: "And that's why SwitchBlade is the WARPED Champion! Taking on two men at once!"
Kris Red: "Enough about your fantasy Tony D... let's focus on the match!"
SwitchBlade and Malik are only on their backs for a moment, but it’s just enough time for Ryder to scurry over and tag in "Grade A" PKA. The crowd boos as PKA steps through the ropes and he and SwitchBlade lock eyes as the official makes sure The Rough Ryder gets out to the apron. SwitchBlade and PKA step to the center of the ring and lock up as Malik and Rough Ryder find their proper places back on the apron. The moment SwitchBlade and PKA touch, PKA drives a knee into the Champs' gut, then smirks... as the crowd boos. PKA applies a side headlock on SwitchBlade, wrenching it in.
Kris Red: "A tight hold on SwitchBlade there by Ol' Peeks..."
SwitchBlade looks to counter with a belly to back suplex, but PKA flips out and lands on his feet. PKA backs into the ropes and returns, looking for a bulldog, but SwitchBlade pushes him away. PKA stops before touching the ropes, then turns around and Switchy is right there waiting with a right hand to the face...and another.. and one more. PKA stumbles around, holding his temple, the punches seemingly hitting perfectly, but he has only a split second to catch his breath as SwitchBlade brings him in and nails a Double Arm DDT! He covers... 1.. 2.. kick out by PKA. SwitchBlade brings PKA to his feet and PKA drops him into a jawbreaker then makes a quick tag in to The Rough Ryder.
Tony D: "And there's the tag to The Rough Ryder, the Number One Contender to the WARPED Title!"
Kris Red: "A lil' double team action comin' atcha!"
Both men hook Switchy in for a Double Suplex. They hit it! PKA flips off Malik Logan out on the apron, and he furiously begins to enter but the ref stops him, and PKA and Ryder put the boots to SwitchBlade bigtime. They bring him to his feet and Ryder scoops and slams SwitchBlade while PKA hits the ropes and nails a dropkick to the side of SwitchBlade's face. Ryder then hits an elbow drop and gets on him with the mounted punches. PKA taunts Logan, who is chomping at the bit to get into the match.
Kris Red: "Malik Logan should just jump in!"
Tony D: "And risk getting DQ'd? Probably not a good idea."
Kris Red: "Hey, it works for the heels!"
Tony D: "The who?"
Kris Red: "Bing it, Tony D. BING!"
PKA gets out on the apron as Ryder works over SwitchBlade with a chin lock. The crowd cheers SwitchBlade on as he gets to his feet and elbows Ryder in the gut then hits him with a hip toss, then another, and a backdrop! SwitchBlade makes the tag to Malik Logan who charges in and Ryder quickly backs to his corner and tags back PKA. PKA shakes his head and hops over the top rope then locks up with Logan in the middle of the ring. They struggle for control, and PKA breaks free and rakes the eyes of Malik Logan leaving Malik stumbling, blinded. Now, Ryder wants in... PKA can't make the tag though, as Logan grabs PKA and turns him around and hits a Chokebreaker! Malik Logan with the cover...1...2.... PKA gets his foot on the bottom rope and the pin is broken up.
Logan pulls PKA away from the ropes and twists his leg, but PKA kicks him away and pushes himself up to his feet. PKA lines up Logan, and as Logan turns around PKA charges.. Superkick~! Logan grabs the foot of PKA just in time. PKA hops on one foot for a moment before quickly unleashing an enziguri in an attempt to free himself from Logan's grasp. Malik ducks the enziguri kick which leaves PKA to flop to the mat and land face down. Logan immediately descends on PKA slapping on an STF!
Tony D: "There's the submission hold!"
Kris Red: "STFU~!"
Tony D: "Okay Michael Cole...simmer down."
Kris Red: "I was talking to you, Tony D, not calling the move."
Logan cranks on the STF Submission hold, leaving PKA to struggle in pain. Referee Jack Lawrence checks him, but PKA is far from ready to submit.
Kris Red: "PKA isn't gonna tap that easy, come on Jack!"
Amazingly, PKA actually begins to scoot both he and Logan closer to the ropes. Inch by inch PKA gets closer and closer to a rope break. The fans begin booing as they see PKA getting close to breaking the hold.
Tony D: "The crowd here in Philly not happy at all that PKA is close to breaking the hold with that rope being so close... not after he insulted their Philadelphia Flyers losing recently..."
Kris Red: "Towns are so sensitive to their local pro teams... its so easy to get cheap heat that way."
Tony D: "Wait, what's Logan up to?"
PKA does not, in fact, make it to the ropes but he gets quite close. Seeing just how close PKA is to the ropes Logan elects to abruptly break off the STF and grabs PKA’s leg, dragging him all the way across the ring to his corner with SwitchBlade. The crowd cheers as PKA is going to get what he deserves now as Logan tags in the WARPED champion, SwitchBlade. SwitchBlade steps through the ropes with a look of joy on his face as he gazes down at PKA.
Tony D: "The Champ is Here!"
Kris Red: "And you call ME Michael Cole!"
SwitchBlade grabs PKA’s head and pulls him up slowly but PKA manages to tap into whatever energy reserves he has left and lurch up, grabbing SwitchBlade’ head and pulling the champ into a jaw breaker! Both men fall out on the mat. The referee looks at both men and begins a 10-count.... 1.... 2.... 3.... PKA immediately begins to crawl to his corner as SwitchBlade rolls to his knees, favoring his jaw. 4.... 5.... SwitchBlade gets to his feet as PKA rises to his too. PKA goes to tag in The Rough Ryder but Ryder backs off and says Nooo! PKA, frustrated, turns back around to SwitchBlade who scoops him and slams him down! SwitchBlade looks to lock in the Crucifix but Ryder gets in the ring and kicks Switchy in the back of his head! The crowd boos as Switchy drops, holding the back of his head in pain. PKA gets to his feet slowly and as Ryder gets out on the apron, a warning from the referee, PKA tags in his partner. Ryder gets in and the two men bring SwitchBlade to his feet and hit a Double Front Suplex! PKA gets out of the ring and Ryder covers SwitchBlade... 1.. 2... Logan in with a kick to break up the cover!
Kris Red: "Ryder breaks it up!"
Ryder brings SwitchBlade to his feet, pulling him up from the back of his tights... Atomic Drop to the Champ! He then spins SwitchBlade around and hits an Inverted Atomic Drop! The ref warns him to watch it there..
SwitchBlade stumbles back against the ropes and Ryder easily removes him from the ring with a clothesline that sends SwitchBlade up and over the top rope and to the floor below! Ryder has a hunch Logan will be on him again and he’s right, he makes a move just in time to see Logan coming and he is barely able to grab Malik and hoist him up with a back body drop. Malik is sent up and over the top rope down to the floor where he collides with SwitchBlade!
SwitchBlade and Malik are attempting to get their heads back into the game as they slowly get to their feet at ringside. Back in the ring Ryder chats with PKA, who now gets in the ring. PKA hits the ropes.. bounces back and heads right for Ryder who lifts PKA up and toss him over the top rope with a massive hip toss! PKA flips and twists through the air and comes down onto SwitchBlade and Malik with a modified corkscrew plancha! The crowd comes to their feet at the sight of the insane move!
HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!
Kris Red: "Oh My God!"
Tony D: "What a move there!"
The official slides to the outside of the ring to check on the pile as we see Ryder with a twinkle in his eyes!
Tony D: "What's he going to do? The most 'high flying' we've seen him do is a baseball slide... but there's a couple targets at ringside.."
Ryder hits the ropes then runs toward the guys at ringside, then puts on the breaks and starts laughing then tells everyone to kiss his ass! He turns around and plays up his smarts for Jessica who claps at the other end of the ring for him. She then frantically tries to get his attention as SwitchBlade is right behind him... he taps Ryder on his shoulder, Ryder turns around and looks like he's seen a ghost as SwitchBlade then kicks him in the gut... Implant DDT! He quickly turns it into the Crucifix Neck Crank and locks the submission in tightly!
Tony D: "SwitchBlade with Enter The Darkness locked in!!!"
The camera pans back to show PKA out on the apron. He springboards off the top rope and lands on SwitchBlade with a leg drop to break up the hold. Ryder rolls out of the way as PKA brings SwitchBlade to his feet, kicks him in the gut and hits the Flipping DDT!
Tony D: "PKA with P-Krusher III!"
Kris Red: "Devastation at its finest!"
The momentum brings PKA to his feet as he stumbles and tries to keep his balance... and almost immediately here comes Malik Logan with the Springboard Twisting DDT on PKA, planting him down to the mat!
Kris Red: "Worcester Tornado!"
Tony D: "What impact!"
Malik Logan has the crowd firmly behind him as they cheer him on and he leaps on top of PKA and hooks the leg!!! 1... 2...
The Rough Ryder grabs the dreds of Logan and pulls him up to his feet, steps back... Superkick!
Kris Red: "Side Swipe!"
The superkick sends Logan back into the ropes.. he bounces off and falls right into the arms of The Rough Ryder who sets him up for the Double Underhook, then lifts him up in a piledriver position and drops down onto his knees, driving Logan's skull into the mat!!!
Tony D: "The Dangerous Driver! The Dangerous Driver!!!"
The Rough Ryder goes into the cover as the crowd boos...1 .... 2.... 3!!!
Tony D: "The Rough Ryder with the three count!!"
The bell sounds.
Randy Long: "The winners of the match - P..K..A and The Rough...Ryderrr!!"
The crowd boos the result as Jessica Reyes joins The Rough Ryder in the ring to raise his arm in victory. PKA gets to his feet, favoring his head as he stands up and makes his way to Ryder. PKA yells at the ref to raise their arms and he does to both Ryder and PKA on each side of him. Ryder and PKA nod at one another and shake hands as this DVD comes to a close.
"TED CRUZ IS THE ZODIAC KILLER"
- Kentucky Tarzan