ASK A LUCHADOR III
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We transition to see the fan favorite, La Flama Blanca. We are at Blanca’s five thousand square feet Long Island, New York home. Cameras are in the kitchen catching Flama in the middle of cooking.
Blanca turns to face the camera wearing a chef’s hat, his mask, and an apron that reads, “Kiss the Luchador”. He smiles and acts startled because he is being filmed.
La Flama Blanca: I didn’t see you there. Que pasa chicanos and gringos? I guess it’s that time again. I have a few minutes to wait for my beef and green chili mix to cool down before I pack them inside some warmed tortillas.
His chef’s hat deflates a little and Blanca notices. He tries to prop it back up and is not successful. He continues.
La Flama Blanca: Today’s show is sponsored again by Smith and Forge Hard Cider. Traditional cider made strong. Voice over guy, first question pro favor.
Voice Over: Howard from Las Vegas, Nevada wants to know, "How many licks to the center of a Tootsie Pop?"
La Flama Blanca: I think it was proven that it’s actually a number like five thousand plus licks. If they say so. If you sit there and count them, you need better things to do with your life. Next!
Voice Over: Faith from New York, New York wants to know, ”What’s on your hot dog?"
La Flama Blanca: Kraut and mustard. one of the best things about this country. good ole penis shaped faux meat in a bun. And no… I never use ketchup. Next!
Voice Over: Holly from Tucson, Arizona wants to know, "What’s the worst band ever?"
La Flama Blanca: People always do lists like that. Three bands that always seem to be at the bottom are Primus, Limp Bizkit, and the Insane Clown Posse. So probably one of those three. Next question.
Voice Over: Deb from York, United Kingdom wants to know, "Why did the Roadrunner always beat the Coyote?"
La Flama Blanca: Well, that was cartoon. Coyotes run faster than roadrunners. That’s real life. Next one.
Voice Over: Julio from Arlington, Texas wants to know, "Cual es tu parte favorita de America?"
La Flama Blanca: Dos cosas. El dinero and las mujeres.
Blanca takes a look at his wrist where a watch would be.
La Flama Blanca: Well it’s that time in the show for the Did You Know? fact of the day. Did you know that when snakes are born with two heads that they fight each other for food? Hmm… seems legit. Next question.
Voice Over: James from Oakland, California wants to know, "What would be the mission that you would choose to accept?"
La Flama Blanca: Relations with a lot of European white women. Shooting guns too. Save the world. Next.
Voice Over: Rob from Toronto, Canada wants to know, "Who is your favorite Batman?"
La Flama Blanca: Movie wise, it’s Bale. Those movies are awesome. Grew up on Keaton but Bale knocked it out of the park. Kevin Conroy is the voice of Batman and the real Batman in my opinion. God, I sound like a nerd. Next, wait… I’m hungry as a maah so I’m going to cut this short. Until next time.
Blanca grabs a plate and a tortilla and begins to spoon some of his dinner into a tortilla. He takes a big bite and smiles at the camera.
La Flama Blanca: Adios, hasta luego mis amigos!
We fade back to our host.