You open the DVD of WARPEDLive! #1 - "The Audition" and enter it into your favorite DVD player. The sounds of "Pogo" by Digitalism play as the WARPED Wrestling logo floats down from the top to the middle of the screen. Underneath that fades in to words "Play DVD". You click... and the show begins.
The show fades in as we see "Chicago Ridge, IL - March 7, 2010" on the bottom right of the screen. It fades out, as the text then reads "Earlier Today" as we are outside of the Frontier Park Fieldhouse seeing a lovely, blonde woman. This is WARPED Wrestling's only female reporter, Kelly Calloway, as she takes a few steps with the camera in tow toward a man stepping out of his car. He closes it, and turns around, dressed in a sharp suit, wearing glasses, his short hair gelled up.
Kelly: "Mr. Matthew! Mr. Matthew, can we get a word with you?"
This is the President of WARPED, Joey Matthew. He takes off his glasses as the mic is put up to him.
Joey: "Please, Kelly, not now. I'm not here for an interview, or to steal the time of the talent. I'm here to watch the show, plain and simple."
Joey opens the back door of his black rental car and pulls out a briefcase. He closes the door and uses the automatic doorlock and alarm.
Joey: "Pardon me.."
He smiles at Kelly, nods, and goes along his way as the scene fades...
Into the live crowd now as the hard camera shows the WARPED ring and the small entrance that is beyond. The entrance isn't anything special, with a square metal frame entrance with a curtain, and a short in length metal stage. The WARPED logo is in banner-form above the entrance, hanging down. The venue is about 1/4 the way full, with about 300 people in house. A small crowd, but its just the beginning.
KURTIS HYDE PROMO
MALIK VS KURTIS
In the ring is WARPED Ring Announcer, Randy Long.
Randy Long: "The following is the first ever WARPED Wrestling match and it is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first.."
A Wolf howling sound is heard over the pa system as smoke begins to fill up the small entrance way, after a few seconds it's replaced by "Antidoted" by story of the year. Out steps Kurtis Hyde to loud boos from the fans but he just smirks and raises his middle finger in the air and walks througth the smoke.
Randy Long: "From New Scotland, weighing in at 224 pounds, Kurtis.. Hyyyyyyyyde!"
Hyde struts down the ramp ignoring the fans wanting to touch greatness, once he reaches the ring he slides under the bottom rope and climbs the nearest turnbuckle and again raises his mniddle finger before climbing down to await his opponent.
Tony D: "Welcome to WARPED Wrestling's first show ever, fans! I am Tony D alongside my long-time broadcast partner, Kris Red, and Kris, its great to be here at the Frontier Park Fieldhouse."
Kris Red: "Tony D, things are about to get RED HOT, RED HOT! I'm excited to get things going."
Tony D: "Our opening bout features Kurtis Hyde taking on Malik Logan.. and Hyde, well, its safe to say he's not a crowd favorite, especially after the comments he made at the Press Conference earlier this week. For those of you watching this at home we will have footage of the Press Conference coming up later in the show!"
Randy Long: "And his opponent... from Worcester, Massachusetts, weighing in at 220 pounds.. he is Malik.."The Hitmannn"..LOoooooogannnn!"
"Act a Fool" by Lil Jon plays as the crowd goes nuts. Malik "The Hitman" Logan comes out of the curtain and puts his arms in the air to the left, then looks to the right, and the crowd gets pumped. He starts dancing down the ramp and as he makes his way toward the ring while slapping some crowd members hands. He gets in the ring and does JTG's taunts as his music fades.
Kris Red: "A very gangstaliscious Malik Logan up in this.."
Tony D: "Oh please, Kris."
Kris Red: "What?!"
The bell sounds and both men tie up.. Kurtis Hyde stomps on the right foot of Malik Logan and slaps him across the face, then clubs him over the back. Hyde reaches down to bring Logan back up, but he gets pushed off. Hyde backs into the ropes and runs for a high knee but Logan sidesteps.. Logan with a kick to the gut.. Logan hits the ropes, Hyde still bent over, and Logan brings his boot up, but Kurtis Hyde grabs the boot and drops him with a single leg takedown. Hyde attempts to turn him over with a Boston Crab but Logan battles back and rolls sideways, and Hyde cartwheels out. Logan gets to his feet and Hyde boots him in the head and covers.. One.. Two.. Kick out.
Tony D: "A great disp.....at two...."
Kris Red: "....kick by Kurtis Hyde. He ... ... ... hated by .... f.. .."
There seems to be some cut out of the audio in the commentary.
Hyde gets to his feet and spits down at Malik Logan, a big sign of disrespect. The new WARPED fans in attendance boo and Kurtis Hyde soaks it all up, enjoying all of the boos. He grins and brings Logan up to his feet. Slap to the face of Logan! Hyde applies a bearhug almost but its quickly obvious what he's going for as he hits the Belly to Belly Suplex! Hyde gets to his feet and raises his arms in the air as the fans show their dislike for his cockiness. He makes his way to Logan who is getting to his feet and kicks him in the head, then brings him abck up and underhooks both arms and hits a Double Arm DDT. He rolls Logan over and covers.. One.. Two.. Kick out.
Kurtis Hyde brings Logan up by his dreads and he gets disiplined by the referee. Hyde tells him to mind his own business as he attempts a vertical suplex next up.. Logan crosses his feet with Hyde's to prevent the move, but Hyde quickly knees Logan in the midsection and instead hits a T-Bone Suplex on the money! Hyde covers.. One.. Two... Kick out! Hyde quickly yells at the referee to count faster and that he tried to screw him out of a win there! The referee gets back in Hyde's face and let's him know who's in charge here and that he will get disqualified if this continues. Hyde gives him a smug look and goes back to Logan who is pushing himself off the mat. Kick to the side of the head from Hyde, taunting him. Hyde brings him up and delivers a chop block, and Logan goes down. Hyde brings him back to his feet and backs him into the ropes.. Irish whip attempt but blocked, and Hyde chops him across the chest to take a little more out of him. Irish whip.. Logan hits the ropes, Hyde follows through with a SPEAR.. into the cover! One.. Two... Th-Kick out!
Hyde slams the mat and yells at the referee to count faster!!! The fans begin to chant for Malik Logan chanting "Mal-ik Lo-Gan"... "Mal-ik Lo-Gan"... repeatedly. Hyde shouts out for the fans to "SHUT UP!" and they continue to chant "Mal-ik Lo-Gan"... "Mal-ik Lo-Gan"... louder.
Logan begins to get to his feet and Hyde cuts him off with a right hand, and another, backing him into the corner. Irish whip to the opposing corner, Hyde charges in and Logan gets the boot up but Hyde stops in his tracks and pushes the leg into the ropes, and kicks the hamstring of Logan! Hyde puts the other leg of Logan over the middle rope and grabs his head, pulling him slowly away from the corner and hooking the feet on the ropes.. DDT! Hyde sits up, a sick smile on his face. He gets to his feet and pulls Logan away from the ropes. He pauses, then drops down, lays his body over Logans and the referee counts one.. two... thrrrrrr kick out!!
Once again Kurtis Hyde gets up in the referee's face and finally the referee uses force and pushes Hyde back. Hyde can't believe what just happened as he brings his fist up, threatening to hit the referee. He hesitates, as the referee threatens a DQ. Hyde puts his finger in the referee's face saying "don't you dare.." and the referee pushes the hand out of his face. Hyde is all fired up. The fans let out another chant .. "Ma-lik Lo-gan"... "Ma-lik Lo-gan"... "Ma-lik Lo-gan"... Hyde tells them to shut up!! "Ma-lik Lo-gan"... "Ma-lik Lo-gan"...
Tony D: "The fans are firmly be-" cut out..
Malik Logan slowly begins to rise to his feet as Kurtis Hyde confidentally makes his way toward him. Hyde drives his boot into the head of Logan, and Logan goes down onto his chest. Hyde brings him up by his dreads, getting threatened again. He grabs the arm.. Irish Whip into the corner. He runs and leaps up for a StingerSplash but Logan ducks out of the way and gets out of the corner, causing Hyde to hit the top buckle face-first! Hyde stumbles back, as Logan bounces off the ropes and hits a high Leg Lariat~! Both men get to their feet and Logan delivers a right hand once.. twice.. three times, and goes for an irish whip but Hyde counters, sending Logan into the ropes. He bounces off and Logan goes for a clothesline, but Hyde ducks behind and locks his arms, and goes for a German Suplex, but Logan lands on his feet! Hyde, frustrated, turns around and charges at Logan who is ready for him as he lifts him into the air and drops him with a Double Knee Gutbuster! The fans are going wild for Malik Logan now as he rushes to the apron and steadily awaits Hyde to rise up.. Hyde slowly gets to his feet and Logan springs off with a spinning wheel kick!
Tony D: "Springboard Spinning Wheel Kick! That's the Starlight from Wortown!"
Kris Red: "Amazing move!"
Logan leaps into the cover, not hooking the leg though.. One.. Two.. Kick out!
Kris Red: "Come on, mann! Hook the leg!"
The fans continue to chant "Ma-lik Lo-gan"... "Ma-lik Lo-gan"... and Logan feeds off the fans, quickly bringing Hyde to his feet now. Logan brings Hyde up onto his shoulders and goes for the Death Valley Driver, stumbling to keep his footing.. and Hyde slides out and behind him. Hyde goes for a German Suplex, but Logan elbows his way out. He turns around, irish whip into the corner.. Logan runs and clotheslines Hyde. He then lifts him up top and climbs up with him, but Hyde suddenly rakes the eyes and Logan drops to the mat. Hyde gets off the turnbuckle and irish whips Logan into the far corner, then runs.. StingerSplash! Logan floats through the middle and top rope to escape as Hyde stumbles back to the middle of the ring, a little stunned from the impact of the buckle. Logan then leaps into the air, twisting a 180 before landing on the top rope and springing back, spinning again and grabbing Hyde by the head.. Tornado DDT!
Kris Red: "Logan hit the 720 DDT with ease! Look out!!"
The fans erupt in cheers for that amazing move now and Logan goes for the cover, hooking both legs... One.. Two... THREE!
Tony D: "One ... ... ...e! That's it! Logan ..s!" -audio cuts out again.
The bellllll sounds!
Randy Long: "Here is your winner - Malik "The Hitman" Logannnnn!"
The fans cheer as Logan's name is announced and he gets up holding his head but a smile is on his face. His arm is raised in victory.
Tony D: "What a match to kick off WARPED Wrestling, Kris. Kurtis Hyde had control of that entire match and Logan pulled out a victory in the end when it seemed like he had reached HIS END!"
Kris Red: "I can't agree with you more there. I thought Kurtis Hyde had this one in the bag.. I call this an major shock."
Suddenly from behind of Logan is Kurtis Hyde as he leaps up and hits the Reverse RKO - "HKO!"
Kris Red: "WHOA! HKO!"
Tony D: "Speaking of major shock, Kurtis Hyde just hit that major move on Malik Logan and listen to this crowd here.. they aren't pleased."
Logan is out cold on the mat as Hyde stands over his body, a look of anger and displeasure filling his face.. Revenge on his mind. The fans boooooo loudly. Hyde now makes his way out of the ring but he's not leaving. He opens the ring apron and pulls out.. a LADDER! Hyde puts the apron down and slides the ladder into the ring as the referee yells at him to stop! Hyde picks up the ladder and sets it up in the corner. He then walks over to the body of Malik Logan and pulls him with all his might to his feet.. Logan completely out. Hyde sends him HARD into the ladder, face first, and he gets stuck on it. Hyde then charges with a StingerSplash, crashing into Logan onto the ladder! Hyde steps back as Logan falls back, the ladder then falling on top of him! Hyde smiles as the fans continue to boo and the referee kneels down next to Logan, pleading for Hyde to back off. Hyde holds his arms in the air as the fans boo. He smiles.. and looks down at Logan with a grin on his face.
The scene opens in the designated parking lot for the wrestlers. Walking towards the front lot of the Frontier Park Field house and a crowd of excited Juggalos is Mr. Rottentreats. He’s looking quite suave in his JC Penney pin-stripe suit. His face paint is damn near perfection, and his dreads pulled back in a large orange and white pony tail. As he gets to the front lot he’s approached by the vivacious Kelly Calloway.
Kelly Calloway: Mr. Rottentreats, you’ve caused quite a stir here and WARPED hasn’t even officially launched yet, how do you feel about that?
Mr. Rottentreats: How do I feel? I feel like it’s raining diamonds you tantalizing tenderoni. You see all these Juggalos in the lot? You hear the chants of family? You hear those Woop Woops? Those are for me! Dangerous Dan Dillinger better have himself an escape plan after the match, because if, and that’s a big if. But if I lose there’s going to be hundreds of angry ass Juggalos coming for him. And there’s two thing sa pro wrestler don’t want chasing him down after the show, that fat chick in the front row in the same seat at every show, and a mob of angry Juggalos.
Kelly Calloway: You seem pretty confident in your abilities Mr. Rottentreats, what if you do lose.
Mr. Rottentreats: I’m going to go to the local bar, whip out my credit card start a tab and have myself a Juggalo party for all these WARPED Juggalos in attendance. And maybe just maybe, if you show up, I’ll let you give me a little neden in the alleyway. Kelly Calloway walks off with a disgusted look on her face as she heads back into the arena.
Back to the live crowd as its time for our second match, a tag team match featuring brothers Tin and Voe Li (eLIte) taking on cousins "Grade A" PKA and The Mighty Aguila.
Randy Long: "The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, already in the ring, from Tokyo, Japan Tin Li and Voe Li, they are eLIte!"
The crowd applauds and gives off a minor cheer for the relative unknowns in the ring as the two Japanese men raise their arms to the crowd.
Randy Long: "And their opponents, The Mighty Aguila and "Grade A" P..K..A!"
The arena goes dark and the spotlight shines on the entrance stage, with blue strobe lights mixed in with the white, bright spotlights. From the entrance comes PKA, clothed in black boots, black, baggy jeans, a white tank top wife beater, and a black leather jacket over that. He also wears a black hat, faced backwards, with a long, silver chain around his neck. Entering behind him is The Mighty Aguila, with short, brown hair, a black WARPED t-shirt, and red shorts on, with white and red boots. PKA and Aguila bump fists and make their way toward the ring, PKA a little slower than Aguila. PKA grabs the back of his head as Aguila rolls in under the ropes and PKA walks up the steps. Aguila goes to the buckle and PKA does to the adjacent and both hold their arms in the air as the fans cheer. PKA steps down and Aguila hops down. PKA requests a microphone and is handed one as the live small crowd quiets down.
PKA: "Just a sec... let me apologize ahead of time for not performing to my normal Grade A abilities tonight.. I'm a bit, uh, hungover."
Aguila, hands on his hips, puts his head down and shakes it back and forth. The Li bros look on, confused.
PKA: "But don't worry, gang, me and my cousin The Mighty Aguila are going to clean house with these Chinamen."
The crowd gasps, some laugh, some are just taken back by the racial slur. Aguila gets wide eyed and whispers something to PKA. PKA shakes his head.
PKA: "Nah, they don't mind.."
Suddenly Tin and Voe attack Aguila and PKA respectively and the referee calls for the bell.
Tin and Voe bring Aguila and PKA up against the ropes and deliver simultaneous right hands, followed by a double irish whip. PKA and Aguila hit the ropes and PKA gets taken down with a dropkick from Tin while Aguila puts on the breaks and Voe drops on his back. Tin Li charges Aguila and Aguila sends him over the top rope. Voe Li rises to his feet and Aguila takes him down with an armdrag. Voe up... Aguila with armdrag#2! Meanwhile, PKA rolls under the ropes and gets up on the apron, holding his head and looking dazed. Aguila in the ring hits a third armdrag and holds on with a kneeling armbar. Voe pushes up and both men are up to their feet and Voe carthweels out and hits an armdrag of his own. Aguila is sent into the corner and kneels there, looking on as Voe tags in Tin. Aguila tags in PKA and we have the exchange.
Tin and PKA tie up in the middle of the ring, and PKA locks in a side headlock. Tin pushes PKA off into the ropes and hits a Japanese Armdrag, PKA flipping over onto the mat. Both men get to their feet and PKA ducks a clothesline and nails a Reverse Falling DDT and covers, hooking the leg.. One... Kick out! PKA brings Tin to his feet but Tin counters with a jawbreaker which doesn't help PKA's hangover at all. Tin hits the ropes and returns with a Yakuza Kick~ but PKA ducks under and nails a Superkick! He drops into the cover.. One.. Two.. Voe Li in with a kick to the head of PKA! The Mighty Aguila rushes into the ring and the referee tells him to get out! Meanwhile Tin and Voe bring PKA to his feet and hit a Double Brainbuster! PKA is on the mat, clutching his head, as Voe quickly gets out of the ring to the apron and Aguila calms himself, allowing the ref to turn around and count for the cover by Tin Li.. One.. Two.. Kick out!
Tin brings PKA to his feet and tags in Voe, and holds him as Voe hits a spinning back kick to the face of PKA, taking him down. Tin gets to the apron while Voe covers.. One.. Two... foot on the bottom rope! The fans cheer for PKA using his veteran knowledge to escape the 3 count.
Voe Li, frustrated, brings PKA up to his feet and slaps him across the chest, backing him into the corner. He puts the boots on PKA's midsection now, dropping him to the mat. Tag in to Tin Li and both men stomp PKA in the corner as the refereee begins the 5-count to disqualify them if they don't knock it off. Voe gets out on the apron as Tin brings PKA to his feet. PKA is groggy, and Tin slaps him across the face. PKA drops to one knee, and Tin brings him up and into the ropes. Irish whip.. Tin with a Yakuza Kick~ but PKA slides between the legs of Tin. Tin turns around and PKA nails a step-up Enziguri! Both men are down now as the referee begins the 10-count. Voe Li and The Mighty Aguila reach out for tags and willing their partners are on as they slowly begin to come to and crawl toward their corners. They creep closer and closer to their corners and make the hot tags!
On the bottom of the screen is a scrollbar promoting the upcoming live event.
UPCOMING LIVE EVENTS: WARPED Wrestling LIVE! in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania - Friday, March 19, 2010. Call 267.687.7560 for Ticket Information
Voe Li in.. The Mighty Aguila in! Right hand by The Mighty Aguila, taking Voe Li down.. Voe up, Aguila with a knife edge chop taking Voe down.. and Voe gets back up only to get a big X-Factor faceplant! Tin Li is up and he goes after Aguila with a shot to the back. Aguila drops down to a knee and Tin brings him up and applies a front facelock, now looking for a vertical suplex perhaps. He lifts Aguila into the air but Aguila drops down behind. He leaps up onto the shoulders of Tin Li, spins around, and hits a hurricanrana sending Tin into the middle rope! PKA gets to his feet now.. and spots this.. as he charges in at Tin and hits the (316) feint kick through the ropes! Meanwhile, The Mighty Aguila goes after Voe Li in the corner, delivering right hands and putting him up top and climbing.
In the ring also, PKA brings Tin Li to his feet and sets him up for the P-Krusher, but Tin counters out and hits a Michinoku Driver, dropping PKA right on his weak-spot, his head! The Mighty Aguila has Voe Li up and calls for the Super-Rana, but Tin Li charges and clubs Aguila in the back, stunning him. Tin then powerbombs The Mighty Aguila and Voe Li stands up tall and leaps off the top with a Corkscrew and lands on Aguila! Voe covers, hooks the leg, one... two.... three! The bell sounds and the fans are shocked as eLIte pick up the victory!
Randy Long: "The winners of this match - Tin and Voe, eeeeeLIIIte!"
Their generic Japanese music hits as they embrace with a hug and then get their arms raised in victory. They smile widely as The Mighty Aguila is out in the middle of the ring. PKA pulls himself up in a corner, clutching his head and looking very dizzy, and very disappointed. The Li's send a grin his way before they exit the ring. PKA stands up completely, bowing his head in disappointment, as The Mighty Aguila begins to stir.
The scene cuts backstage after the last match to Malik Logan standing with Kelly Calloway.
Kelly: Malik, you had a tremendus match, and you won! Your thoughts
Malik: It was a hard fought match, but I came out on top and that's all that really matters that final 3. If Hyde didn't know my name then, he does now.
Malik walks off the set as the camera goes back to Kelly.
Kelly: Thank you for your time.
The scene cuts out.
The DVD cuts away to video from Monday, March 1, 2010, as WARPED held a press conference outside the Frontier Park Fieldhouse to promote the show.
The Press Conference footage opens as we are outside of the Frontier Park Fieldhouse in Chicago Ridge, Illinois. Dozens of reporters are on hand as well as fans that will be attending the upcoming March 7th debut show for WARPED Wrestling right here in the same venue.
On one side of the podium of WARPED President Joey Matthew and beside him is WARPED Talent Dan Dillinger. On the other side we see WARPED Talents Theo Davis and Kurtis Hyde.
Up to the podium is WARPED Color Analyst, Kris Red, wearing black slacks with a black button up shirt and a red vest over it, and a white tie, his hair gelled up in a faux hawk.
Kris Red: "Members of the press and WARPED fans, welcome to our first official Press Conference. We are pleased to have you all here today and are excited to announce that tickets are selling very well for our debut event this Sunday night in that building, but there's still room available. Sunday, March 7th, 2010, WARPED Wrestling will debut in the Fieldhouse and show the world what we're made of. Bring your signs, bring your pride, and get ready to enjoy a night of wrestling like you haven't seen in a long time. Video cameras will be on hand to tape for our DVD release, so get fired up!"
The crowd claps and there are a few whistles and chants from the crowd.
Kris Red: "Today, you'll hear from the talent and will learn something about them that you didn't know, plus they will take questions from the press. Volunteers were asked to join us as apart of this press conference and the three men you see at my side, Kurtis Hyde, Dan Dillinger, and Theo Davis, have all stepped up to the plate, and will speak to you soon. Also, WARPED President Joey Matthew will take the podium to speak to all of you and take your questions. First up, let me introduce to you the man who will take part in the first ever WARPED match this Sunday, Kurtis Hyde!"
Kurtis Hyde is up next to take the mic. He is wearing a all black suit, black shoes and dark sunglasses. Kurtis, drops his shades so he's glaring at the people in the room. He taps on the mic to make sure it's working.
Kurtis: It may say volunteers in the memo sent out to the Warped Wrestling wrestlers but make no mistake about it i was begged by Joey to be here since i'm the top draw talent he has signed or will ever sign. My name is Kurtis Hyde or to you press and all my legion of adorin fans i'm "Main Attraction", "Evolution of Excellence" Kurtis Hyde. I just get this straight right here right now, i will take no questions from you people cause i don't answer to anybody. I came to Warped Wrestling because it's new, it's inovatove, well no not really because it's a small time indy fed that needs help. Thats why i signed with them because i'm unlike most americans a good hearted soul, i'm unique in tha sense but thats me.
Kurtis: My goals here in Warped are really, very simple. I'm gonna become Wolrd and Evolution Champion because i'm that good..
Kurtis: You know theres good news and bad news coming off the announcement on the first card, the good news is that i open the show, i ste the bar for the night and that is the bad news. Because there is no way that anybody on this roster can come even close to matching what i do to Maik Logan on March the 7th.
Kurtis: Maik, do yourself i favour kid and juts say no to Joey and just keep your health and live to fight another day. That is all from the best in the world at this sport, watch the show.
Kurtis Hyde confidentally steps away from the podium as the fans in the crowd boo and hiss and the press snap photos. Kris Red rejoins us as he tries to get out of the way of Hyde as he pushes past.
Kris Red: "Well, folks, there you have it.. Kurtis Hyde, who will be facing MALIK Logan, not Maik, this Sunday night. Thank you. Next up we have a man by the name of "Dangerous" Dan Dillinger. Let's hear what he has to say. Dan!"
Dillinger gets up from his seat and pushes it in and makes his way to the podium. Kris Red steps aside.
Dan Dillinger: “Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen of the Press, I am Dan Dillinger from Columbus, Ohio. I hear to speak about this beautiful organization known as WARPED Wrestling. All of us from the wrestlers to the staff are really excited about WARPEDLive! - “The Audition” On Sunday, March 7th, 2010 in Chicago, Illinois at the Frontier Park Fieldhouse. That evening I will be in a singles match against a singles competitor that calls himself, “Mr. Rottentreats”. Now I don't know who this so-called “Juggalo” is or what he thinks he will accomplish here. But my past achievements speak for themselves, I was a champion in any division or league that I entered. For a while now I have been a local newscaster for Columbus, Ohio while training with some of the greatest individuals to ever enter the squared circle. And now I have come to WARPED to take all of my training I have gained and use that to defeat any opponent that faces me. In the past it has been a very easy task to control and dominate my opponent at any cost and that is what I plan to do. WARPED to me will soon become one of the biggest Pure Professional Wrestling Programs in the United States. Just wait until Sunday, March 7th, 2010 and come on down to the Fieldhouse and the roster and I will show all of you some of the greatest newcomers in Professional Wrestling. Now if you excuse me I will not be answering any questions. Move on.”
Dillinger makes his way back to his seat as Kris Red comes back to the podium, shrugging his shoulders down at the press who wanted questions answered.
Kris Red: "I- I'm very sorry to the members of the Press uh, it seems Dan had no interest in hearing from you. Nonetheless, thank you Dan.. Uh.. okay, well we have one more talent to go. This man will be wrestling in the Main Event and is a mat technician. Let's hear it for "The Great Leo" Theo Davis! Theo!"
Theo Davis is dressed pretty casual - blue jeans, a black Reckless Kelly t-shirt and a pair of aviator sunglasses. He takes the stand and takes a quick sip of water before removing his glasses and putting them in his shirt.
DAVIS: Hello everyone. I trust you all are well. I'm Theo Davis, I've been travelling around the world for the past ten years attempting to put my mark on the professional wrestling circuit. I've studied with the Japanese, the Mexicans, the Australians and the Europeans. I've spent full years in other countries just to immerse myself in the languages, the culture and the wrestling so that when I return home, I can honestly say I've learned something and so that I can pick up various things that I can use to my advantage against wrestlers who may think they've got me well scouted. Anyways let's get to some questions. Yes?
REPORTER #1: After having watched you for a number of years, I'm excited to see what you can contribute to an American company. Are you excited for this stint with Warped Wrestling?
DAVIS: Totally. You're right, too. As much time as I've spent in all the places I've mentioned, I've really not spent a whole lot of time right here in the United States. I feel that with my ten year anniversary coming up, it's as good a time as any to begin. I've worked various spots shows obviously but I've never been able to sit down in the States and have steady work. Part of it was me not wanting to due to my family and other things like that but the circumstances are right and I'm very excited for what Warped Wrestling can potentially bring to the table.
REPORTER #2: Let's talk about your opponent for a moment. Brian Zane. Do you know anything about him?
DAVIS: Of course. As soon as I heard who I was up against I did some research on him. He's a little bigger than me physically and we've got around the same years of experience. I wasn't able to find any solid background information on him but I watched some matches on YouTube. The guy knows what he's doing in the ring, I'll give him that. He's younger by six years so he might have a jump on agility and speed or more appropriately, he might think he has. I'm only thirty. I can still go but obviously my days of being capable of doing that are winding down quickly. He claims to be psychotic and that's demonstrated in his matches. He likes to climb up things and jumps off which makes him a dangerous individual but dangerous to himself as well. He's young and he thinks he's invincible to some extent so he's prone to taking more risks which in turn could lead to him making more mistakes. I've been around the block, I know how to capitalize on those mistakes so I'm ready for him. It should be an interesting clash to say the least. Any further questions?
Davis looks around before looking to Matthew. Who stands up and begins making his way over to the podium.
DAVIS: Alright then. In closing, I'd just like to reiterate that I'm very excited for this opportunity and look forward to competing next weekend.
President Joey Matthew now takes the podium, nodding at Theo Davis as he takes his seat.
Joey Matthew: Let me first say that I am very honored to be the head of another company that is showing so much promise with the level of talent we have. Let me follow up that by saying no matter how good the talent looks on the outside, it all comes down to how much heart they really have. I've seen situations where there's all the talent in the world in an organization but the lack of determination and drive to put forth the effort to succeed caused the fed to die out. I hope that this isn't the case here in WARPED and I will do my part to make sure things work out the way they are meant to. I invite everyone to join us for our first show this Sunday night at the Frontier Park Fieldhouse here in Chicago Ridge and give us a chance. We're calling this "The Audition" for a reason, because this is the fed getting up there and trying to put on a show that will prove our worth to the entire world. And some of you must watch the talent shows on television to know that the first audition is a make or break. We've got to come to play this Sunday, and I am confident that everyone on the roster will do just that. I'll take questions from the press if there are any..
Reporter #3: Mr. Matthew, sir, why did you choose to not bring WARPED onto a national base such as you had with Headstrong Wrestling?
Joey Matthew: Well its quite simple - the money isn't there. A lot of money was lost when Headstrong Wrestling went under in 2006 and the untimely attempt at a relaunch in early 2007, so this is truly not only the most realistic route, but in my opinion its the best route. No fed can truly start at the top. Let's be real, right?
Reporter #4: A lot of people are second guessing your abilities to make this work, what with your past, well..
Joey Matthew: My past what? Failures? Do we speak of the Total J Cup tournament? Sure, that failed miserably near the end, and I feel terrible for that. This is different. I have put a lot of planning and a lot of time, and money as well, into WARPED and the talent we've acquired over the past month. Now, that's not to say the Total J Cup didn't mean the world to me, because it did, and I hope we can resolve that open-wound in time, but for now, all focus is on WARPED and moving forward. Yes, go ahead.
Reporter #2: When will we see the Championships of WARPED decided?
Joey MattheW: I'm of firm belief with our new direction with the WARPED promotion that we must first find out who is a contender and who is not. Everyone starts with a clean slate and everyone has to work their way up. I think, if I were to put a timeline on the idea of a Champion being crowned, we'd need a few shows under our belt before any of that happened. Good question.
Reporter #1: Many are wondering what kind of a company will you be operating, in terms of angle-focus, match-focus, family-friendly environments or grunge-type atmospheres. If you could describe a little for us, that'd be great.
Joey Matthew: Sure. WARPED will focus a lot on wrestling, and I've recruited some of the best in the world with more to come, but in the world of wrestling and being entertaining, there also have to be compelling storylines and such. I urge you all to follow the 'Videos' of promos the stars put up as well as Show Recaps and DVD releases as well which will showcase the storylines and angles in ways the live crowd could not view them. As far as the type of atmosphere we're promoting, this is reality. People will get angry, some will curse, some will choose to hold back their thoughts. I'm not censoring anyone. We're turnin' em loose, and no matter how 'warped' the process gets, it'll be quality and it'll be real.
Joey Matthew: That's all the questions I'll take for now, as we're out of time, but thank you all and please join us this Sunday night here at the Fieldhouse. See you then. Thank you!
Pictures are snapped as Joey waves to the crowd and is joined by Kris Red for a briefing. The talent get up from their seats and as this happens the cameras fade out.
The livecrowd is shown again with an almost-empty wrestling ring, only consisting of the referee for the next mathc.
Kris Red: Test.. Test.. We're back Tony D!
Tony D: Finally we got this audio issue worked out so it seems. Sorry about that fans.
Kris Red: Seriously, this isn't the way things used to be.. we need a bailout from the government.
Tony D: I'm not sure we're going to get that but what we are going to get is another wrestling match. Now this next match should be quite interesting, Kris. “Dangerous” Dan Dillinger is set to take on the enigmatic Mr. Rottentreats.
Kris Red: I don’t get what’s so “enigmatic” about him. I mean he’s just a juggler. Even I know how to juggle.
Tony: Kris, he’s a Juggalo.
Kris: Isn’t that street lingo for juggler?
Tony: I’ll explain later. For now let’s head to the ring and get this match started.
Randy: The following match is scheduled for one fall with a twenty minute time limit.
The crowd of painted faces in the bleachers are going crazy because they know their favorite Mr. Rottentreats is about to lay a Juggalo beat down on Dangerous Dan Dillinger. Mr. Rottentreats is soaking it all in enjoying a nice ice cold Candy Apple Faygo. His custom hatchet man jersey bright white with not a spot on it, but that’s soon to change.
Over the house PA you hear "We've got Fun Houses, Murder Go Round's, House of Horrors and Wax Museum's, Tunnels of Love, Terror Wheel's, House of Mirror's and Killing Fields".
Randy: Hailing from The Carnival Grounds, and weighing in at 200 pounds…MR. ROTTENTREATS.
The sound of an old time record is heard skipping followed by In Yo Face by Insane Clown Posse bursting it’s way onto the house PA. A small section of painted faces in the bleachers get even rowdier than before as Mr. Rottentreats with his orange dreads and custom white hockey jersey with an orange hatchet man on the front steps down from the bleachers.
The name on the back reading Rottentreats and the number 17. Cast across his shoulder is his orange and white "Bag of treats" the crew of Juggalos follow him to the guard rail singing along with his entrance music much to the disdain of other WARPED fans. Most of the Juggalos getting pelted with soda cans and concession items. But they retaliate by spraying Faygo all over everyone.
Mr. Rottentreats straddles the guard rail and reaches into his "bag of treats" and pulls out two cans of Faygo Redpop, he hits his forehead with them before popping both open and taking swigs then throwing them out into the crowd. Then he reaches into his bag of treats and pulls out a 2 liter of Diet Root beer Faygo, shakes it up until the top pops off and he sprays the Juggalos and other members of the crowd in the general vicinity before throwing the bottle into the crowd.
He jumps off the guard rail and rolls into the ring and stands taking off his Faygo soaked hatchet man jersey and throwing it into the crowd, and shaking the Faygo out of his dreads as the song ends he jerks the microphone away from Randy Long and pushes him to the side.
Tony: Quite an entrance by Mr. Rottentreats. He sure knows how to stand out from the crowd.
Kris: I’m still waiting for him to juggle.
Tony: Quiet time, Kris…
Mr. Rottentreats: Now listen up and Listen good Dan Dillinger, don’t be expecting to come out here and out wrestle me, cause it ain’t gonna happen buddy! Because once you get out here I’m going to display a repertoire of suplexes that not even Peter Senerchia or Nuufolau Joel Seanoa could fathom. I’m gonna hit you with lariats so hard that even John Stanley Hansen, Jr. himself would have no choice but to be proud. I’m gonna twist and mangle, and batter and bruise you. Your girlfriend, your family, your friends, and even WARPED owner Joey Matthew won’t recognize you when he's handing out the pay when I’m finished with you. So come on down here and get your Juggalo beat down because I got a party I’ve gotta get to.
Mr. Rottentreats throws the microphone back at Randy Long before going to his corner and stretching as Dillinger’s music hits.
"Idols and Anchors" by Parkway Drive hits the P.A. speakers. The small hall lights turn off and a heavy strobe and fog fills the small hall. Green and White shades start to flash as "Dangerous" Dan Dillinger walks out from behind the curtain and raises his hands. He starts to jumps and runs back and forth on the stage taunting the crowd at all angles.
Randy: His opponent, hailing from Columbus, Ohio and weighing in at 205 pounds…”Dangerous” DAN DILLINGER!
Dillinger walks down the ramp and starts to show appreciation to his loyal fans. He gets onto the apron and jumps over the rope and rolls to the other side of the ring throwing his hands up leaning against the ropes.
Kris: Dillinger looks to be ready for a fight here tonight.
Tony: He’s not only a submission specialist, but he also has a mixed bag of technical and high flying maneuvers in his arsenal.
Kris: And yet none of that matters if he gets his head wrapped around a steel chair.
As Randy Long exits the ring, the referee calls for the bell. It rings, and the match officially starts. Dillinger quickly rushes towards Mr. Rottentreats, but the Juggalo is equally quick and side steps Dillinger who finds himself face first into the top turnbuckle pad. Rottentreats takes advantage of this accident by grabbing Dillinger, lifting him over his head, and spinning him around with the ol’ Wind Me Up. After a few seconds of this he drops Dillinger and laughs at the dizzy dangerous one who starts throwing lefts and rights at the air. Rottentreats runs the ropes and chop blocks Dillinger to the ground. He runs the ropes again, and as soon as Dillinger lifts his head up, hits the Wigsplitta! He goes for the pin. 1…2… Kick out.
The Juggalo picks up Dillinger and grabs him by the neck. He goes for a vertical suplex, but Dillinger manages to block it. He goes for a second attempt, but it’s blocked once again. Rottentreats with the third attempt, and he finally lifts him up, but Dillinger manages to turn himself in the air and slides right behind Rottentreats. Dillinger grabs him by the waist and hits a release German suplex. Before Rottentreats is even able to pick himself up The dangerous one rushes towards the Juggalo and grabs him in a front face lock. Rottentreats waves his arms around hoping to find the ropes, but he is unfortunately nowhere near them. Dillinger, sensing that Rottentreats isn’t ready to tap, changes plans and lifts Rottentreats up for a surprisingly quick saito suplex. Rottentreats is down, and Dillinger takes this opportunity to climb the top rope, taunting the crowd as they cheer him on. Once at the top he jumps and connects with Malignant Enthral! The pin is made. 1…2… No! Kick out at the last half second.
Dillinger picks up the still dazed Rottentreats and grabs him from behind. He applies the half nelson, and then lifts Rottentreats up with great strength for a Dillingerplex. However, instead of going for the pin, Dillinger starts taunting the crowd and points out how “weak” the fallen Rottentreats is.
Kris: Now this isn’t smart of Dillinger, Tony. He’s taking way too much time hyping the fans up instead of just getting the win. It’s a classic rookie mistake, but I can understand why he would want to get the fan’s attention. Compared to Rottentreats, he’s a bit bland.
Tony: Speaking of Rottentreats…where did he go?
Sure enough, Rottentreats has disappeared from the ring. Dillinger turns away from the fans, and he finds himself without an opponent. Perplexed, he argues with the referee who also doesn’t seem to know where Rottentreats went. Both Dillinger and the referee look around at ringside, but the Juggalo appears to have vanished. Suddenly, a group of fans start to boo as they spot Rottentreats climbing out from under the ring holding his “bag of treats.” He gestures for the crowd to be quiet, but they continue to shout out his location. They fall on deaf ears as both Dillinger and the referee look in the opposite direction. Rottentreats enters the ring, pulls out another can of Faygo, and shakes up the can. He gets behind Dillinger, and pokes him on the shoulder. The dangerous one turns around, and before he can say anything, Rottentreats pops open the can and the fizzy pop goes flying into Dillinger’s eyes blinding him. The referee turns around just as Rottentreats disposes of the “foreign” object.
Tony: And Rottentreats uses the soda pop to his advantage. I can’t believe I just said that.
Kris: I can’t believe you just called it soda pop.
Rottentreats grabs the impaired Dillinger and connects with BLAAM! Rottentreats hooks the leg for the pin. 1…2…3!
The referee calls for the bell as Rottentreats stands up and holds his hands up in victory. The referee grabs his arm to make the win official, but Rottentreats pushes the ref away and yells obscenities at him.
Randy: Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of this match by pinfall…MR. ROTTENTREATS!
Tony: And Mr. Rottentreats picks up the somewhat controversial win over Dan Dillinger here tonight.
Kris: Apparently Rottentreats isn’t just a juggler, he’s also a magician.
His disappearing act, while a bit unorthodox, did get him the all important three count at WARPED’s first show. Tony: Don’t forget about Dillinger, Kris. He showed the crowd just a small taste of what he can do in the ring. However, his cocky attitude may hinder him from reaching true greatness in the future.
Suddenly, the lights around the arena shut off completely. A few of the fans scream out of both excitement and fear. Occasionally the lights flicker back on, but only briefly before shutting back off again. Suddenly, a deep, ominous voice is heard from above.
Voice: Do you believe in second chances? Do you believe in redemption of the sins of the past? Let my return be a sign that all things are possible, that all of mankind is blessed with the free will to change who they once were. It is here that I will be reborn as a hero of the people.
Voice: We all need a hero in our lives…let me be yours.
And just like that, the lights come back on without any sign of anyone being present. Many fans look confused about what just happened.
Cut backstage in the hallway as we see Austin Sanders standing in the middle of PKA on his right, and The Mighty Aguila on his left. PKA has a towel around his neck while Aguila stands there still in his ring gear, not looking very happy though.
Austin: "Guys, can you give your thoughts on that upsetting loss earlier tonight against the tag team of eLIte?"
The Mighty Aguila: "First off holmes, its whatever, ya know..? We got some prep in, some training, but I guess we just been out 'tha game fuh too long. We'll get back into it, right Cuz?"
PKA grabs the microphone out of Sanders' hands.
PKA: "Dude, I don't have time for this.. I got a splitting headache, and no advil. So unless you're gonna pass me something to make this hangover go away, I'm done here."
PKA shrugs and gives Aguila a look, who isn't too sure what PKA's attitude is all about. PKA walks off camera view and Austin calls for the cutscene.
Austin: "Cut.. cut.. "
He turns to Aguila, who is still standing there. The camera begins to shake as its being adjusted, and it pans down to the ground, but its still recording as we hear audio..
Austin: "What's going on with him? Is his head right?"
Aguila: "Funny word usage, but I know what you mean. Seriously, I don't know. He's been a bit off base lately. I think he might've been out too late last n......"
Cut back to the live crowd now as they prepare for the upcoming main event contest. "Till I Collapse" by Eminem starts blasting over the PA System.
Till the roof comes off, till the lights go out
Till my legs give out, can’t shut my mouth.
Till the smoke clears out - am I high? Perhaps
I'ma rip this shit till my bone collapse.
Till the roof comes off, till the lights go out
Till my legs give out, can’t shut my mouth.
Till the smoke clears out and my high burn out
I'ma rip this shit till my bone collapse.
Randy Long: "The following contest is our main event of the evening! Introducing first, from Houston, Texas, he is "The Insane" Brian Zane!"
As the song keeps playing a tall built but slender individual wearing a tight black tanktop, baggy black shorts and a black due-rag, with a pair of all black nike shox, standing at he top of the ramp. The individual starts bouncing to the music. After a few seconds the individual does a side flip and begins walking down the ramp toward the ring. The crowd starts going wild once they see that it was "The Insane" Brian Zane. He walks to the ring, walks up the steps but instead of stepping through the ropes he pulls back and springboards over the top rope into the ring.
The opening orchestra of Hammerfall's "Hero's Return" begin playing over the PA system. As the song bursts into its full on guitar driven melody, Theo Davis bursts out from behind the curtain and raises his arms to adulation of the fans.
Randy Long: "And introducing his opponent, from Owen Sound, Ontario Canada, he weighs in at 224 pounds, "The Great Leo" Theo Daviiiis!"
Davis steps down the ramp onto the floor and saunters down to the ring, where he climbs up onto the apron and removes his leather jacket. He hangs it up on the corner post, climbs the ropes and raises his right arm in the air before hopping into the ring.
Kris Red: "The end of the night is upon us, Tony D, as we finish off the very first event with a man who is known for his great wrestling ability, Theo Davis, taking on the very psychotic Brian Zane."
Tony D: "You're right Kris. The bell is about to sound, let's get to the action!"
Ding Ding Ding! Theo Davis and Brian Zane step out of their corners and begin circling the ring, keeping their eyes locked on one another. They slowly approach one another, hands up.. the hands lock and they jockey for control. Zane uses his heighth advantage to overpower Davis, driving him slowly to the mat, but Davis' body archs, as his head touches the mat. Zane looks confused as what to do, but he quickly kicks the ribs of Davis and releases the hold, causing Davis to drop. Zane smiles. He stomps Davis in the midsection not once but twice, then stomps his head, and continues around the body with every limb, getting both legs and then once again to the midsection where he started. Zane drops down and covers.. One - kick out!
"The Insane" Brian Zane brings Theo Davis up to a seated position and applies a sleeper hold. Davis grabs the hand of Zane, bending the fingers back and escaping the hold, now rising to his feet and wrenching back the wrist of Zane. Davis trips up Zane and he falls to his back, and Davis drops to his knees and wrenches back on the left wrist of Brian Zane. Zane tries pushing away, but Davis has it locked in. Zane kicks his legs up and rolls backward out of it and turns it into a wristlock on Theo Davis, as both men rise to their feet. Davis quickly counters into an arm wrench, as he twists away. Zane looks to be in much pain as he thinks of a way out. He then headbutts Davis in the face to escape, and Davis bends down, clutching his face, and Zane kicks him right in the face then hits a big clothesline and covers.. One.. Kick out!
Zane lifts Davis up by his head and delivers a right hand, followed by another, and one more, backing Davis into the ropes. Zane with an irish whip.. Davis hits the ropes and Zane is there waiting as he hits a high elevated dropkick on Davis. Zane rushes into the cover, hooking the leg.. One.. Kick out! Another quick kickout by Theo Davis.
Zane brings Davis to his feet and applies the front facelock, and hooks up the arm, and lifts him in the air for a vertical suplex but Davis drops down behind. Zane turns around and Davis delivers a hard right hand and the crowd cheers him on. A hard chop from Davis is next up right to the chest, and another, and a third! Davis is on a comeback as he sends Zane into the corner with an irish whip and charges in but Zane gets a boot up and nails Davis right in the jaw, then follows it up with a bulldog! Brian Zane looks up smiling at the fans and rolls Davis over onto his back for the cover.. One.. Two.. Kick out. Zane gets to his feet and stomps the mat with both feet, then taunts Davis with slight kicks as he begins to rise to his feet. Paintbrushing the head of Davis is Brian Zane as he has him where he wants him. Zane gets in Davis' face, slapping him slightly right hand, left hand.. right.. left.. and finally Theo Davis snaps, kicks Zane in the gut and hits a Northern Lights Suplex right into the turnbuckle! The crowd erupts as Davis pounds the mat and gets to his feet, pulling a stunned Brian Zane to his feet. Slap to the chest! Chop to the chest! Slap! Chop! Slap! Chop! The tanned chest of Brian Zane is fire red now as Theo Davis backs him into the ropes and sends him off with an irish whip. Zane bounces off and Davis is there with a big knee to the gut, and Zane flips onto the mat, clutching his midsection. Davis is fired up as he pulls Zane up to a seated position and delivers a HARD kick to his back!
And another kick to the back! Zane screams out and Davis then delivers another very hard kick, this time to his chest! Zane drops to the mat and Theo Davis covers, hooking the leg.. One.. Two... arm up! Davis grabs the arm and applies a Fujiwara Armbar!! Zane is in lots of pain now as Davis attempts to make him tap out. Zane tries to get to the ropes, moving his legs toward the ropes, inching closer and closer. Davis pulls back on the arm as hard as he can, grabbing the fingers as well and pulling back, causing even more pain! Finally Zane reaches the ropes barely with his left boot and the referee calls for the break. Davis does so, and Zane quickly rolls out of the ring, clutching his arm. Davis to his feet, and isn't going to let up. He hits the ropes and charges toward Zane, flipping through the ropes and taking out Brian Zane!
Tony D: "Look out!"
Kris Red "Tope Con Hilo!"
Davis demolishes Zane and the fans go wild over that move! Theo Davis gets to his feet and the 300+ fans in attendance make as much noise for him as they possibly can. He brings Brian Zane up to his feet and rolls him into the ring and climbs up onto the apron. Davis waits for Zane to get up, which he does..slowly.. Davis reaches in but Zane is ready as he catches the head of Davis and pulls it down onto the rope! This gives Zane a second now as Davis clutches his threat, gasping for breath. Zane attempts a suplex into the ring but Davis lands on his feet, one step ahead, and hits a Half nelson suplex! Zane is stunned now, as he ends up on his knees, begging for a break. Davis charges in with a roaring knee to Brian Zane, dropping him hard. Davis quickly applies the double chickenwing and bridges over..and Zane is in excruciating pain!
Tony D: "He calls this Wings of the Dragon, Kris. Look at how he has the submission locked in!"
Kris Red: "Brian Zane has no chance of escaping this and if he does that's the only way he will be able to continue on but he has to do it fast! This move has caused many men to submit!"
The move better known as "Cattle Mutilation" is sinched in, and Brian Zane quickly taps after only about 10 seconds and this match is over!
Randy Long: "The winner of the match - "The Great Leo" Theo.. Daaaaviiiiiis!"
"Hero's Return" by Hammerfall hits the PA System as the fans stand up and applaud/cheer for Davis, the decisive victor of this match. He has his arm raised in victory and he has a smile on his face. Davis climbs the turnbuckle and poses for the fans as they continue to cheer. He nods his head in approval as he drops down off the buckle. Davis makes the rounds to each turnbuckle before leaving the ring and slapping the hands of fans along ringside. Davis makes his way to the entrance and turns around, and raises his arms as the fans cheer. Fade out to the WARPED logo...
"TED CRUZ IS THE ZODIAC KILLER"
- Kentucky Tarzan