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("Nothing Else Matters" by Metallica plays as the voiceover begins.....)

(A splitscreen of Summer and Angel is shown.)

Greg Parker- Last month we saw the beginning of something the IWO had never seen. Women had become a serious threat. Tonight, it will take Desperate Measures to peel Angel and Summer off of each other after they're through with one another.

(a clip is shown of the Raging One & Dark Wolf brawling.)

JT- The Raging One made his mark very quickly here in the IWO. He's been virtually unstoppable as of late. He has proven to be as mentally unstable as the likes of Mad Max, yet his wrestling prowess has been proven time and time again. Tonight, he'll go to Desperate Measures to win himself a shot at gold.

(clip of Mad Max fighting with Capital Punishment.)

Nikki- Women played a huge role in the Extreme Title contest. Mad Max and Capital Punishment have long been fighting over a woman for so long now that the Executive Board so no better an oppurtunity here. Now, tonight, they will go to Desperate Measures to settle their dispute.

(clip of the Vietnam Veteran executing the Saigon Strangle. Another clip is then shown of Zombie executing the Zombie-plex.)

GP- A clear cut case of good versus evil. Zombie and the Veteran have duked it out since the very end of Broken Hearts, Broken Bones. Tonight, they fight not just to determine if good truely is greater than evil, but for the coveted World Title shot. And they will go to Desperate Measures to achieve that glory.

(clip of Scott Morris winning the Ladder Royal last month to earn a title shot.)

JT- Scott Morris has gone by many names in his IWO career. He has won many titles, teamed with many men, and fought many battles. Yet he never got a big break. Tonight is his chance. He will face the unstoppable Titan in one on one combat...and in the end, it will take Desperate Measures for either man to prove victorious.

Nikki- Desperate Measures will be taken.....

("It's Electric" by Metallica plays as fireworks go off literally all over the place. The fans are on their feet screaming and shouting, carrying a colorful signfest display of all sorts of things. The camera focuses in on one sign that says "WWF- Attituide"....whatever that means. JT, GP, and Nikki can be heard speaking but the words cannot be made out over the crowd for a short while.)





JT- My ears are ringing!! Thank God it finally calmed down a little bit in here!!

Nikki- Whew, the opening wore me out. When's this schindig over?

GP- We got awhile to go Nikki....let's get the ball rolling though!!

United States Title Match
Special Stipulations to be announced
Ken War -c- v. Inferno

Announcer- Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Desperate Measures! Our first match has some special stipulations which read as follows- There will be a best out of 3 series to be held all tonight. The first person to defeat their opponent twice shall be declared the winner, and United States champion!!

(a pop is heard throughout the crowd.)

Announcer- Furthermore, each of the three matches will hold special stipulations! The first match is as follows- It is a No Ropes Razorwire Cage Match! No ropes, a razorwire hell in a cell cage, mystery boxes along the sides of the ring where the ropes should be, the mystery boxes hold weapons, spike nails are in the center of the ring, the razorwire cage is electrified, and you have to win by knock out!

GP- They're going to kill each other!! Folks, I'm told that the cage was set up in a location other than this our camera crew will take you there now!

Ring Announcer- The following matchup is the first match in a best 2 out of 3 match for the IWO United States Title. Introducing first, the challenger, he is a former 3-time IWO North American champion, standing at 6 feet, 11 inches tall, and presiding from Phoenix, Arizona, the master of the Backdraft, he is INFERNO!

("Firestarter" by Prodigy begins to play and the crowd goes nuts. Inferno walks out wearing a red Inferno t-shirt with the yellow Inferno logo in the center, red pant length wrestling tights with yellow flames on each side, and black wrestling boots. He walks down to the ring and he gets inside of the cage)


Ring Announcer- And now, introducing the IWO United States Champion, a former IWO world champion, a former IWO north american champion, and a former IWO television champion, he is the master of the Drop, representing the NWF, he is...Ken War!

("Kiss my Ass" by Ted Nungent begins to play and the crowd boos like Hell. Ken War is being showered in trash from the crowd, he gets in the ring and he looks around at all the hardcore tools and he smiles, the bell rings)

GP- THIS ONE IS UNDERWAY! Let us remind you folks that these matches came from the sick and twisted heads of Inferno and Ken War! Inferno and War are in a grapple now! War throws Inferno and Inferno flies into the electrified cage! Inferno is being shocked by the razorwire cage! Oh my God! Ken War pulls Inferno down from the cage and he has him set up for a bull dog, he bulldogs Inferno into the spikenails! Oh god! No! No! That is hideous! Ken War is now stomping on Inferno, those stomps are mashing Inferno into those spike nails! Oh my! Ken War is in a rampage! Ken War pulls Inferno to his feet and gives him a DDT into those spike nails! This is hideous! Inferno has a nail sticking in his head, Inferno pulls the nail from his head and jams it into Ken War's chest! Oh wow! Inferno kicks Ken War and gives him a face buster into those spike nails! They are utilizing those nails more than the mystery boxes and the electric razorwire cage! Inferno is now slamming War's face into those nails repeatedly! Inferno pulls Ken War to his feet and he throws Ken War into one of the mystery boxes and the mystery boxes explodes and Ken War flies a few feet straight into the razorwire electrified cage. He is cut up from the cage and being shocked by the electricity! Inferno is up top and he tries to jump down on War but War uses his legs to kick Inferno into the cage! What a move!


Nikki- This is just the beginning of the first match you guys!

GP- Inferno is still moving, he is using all his energy to keep alive in this match, he is punching Ken War in the face and he now has pulled Ken War up. Inferno lifts Ken War up and holds him up against the cage and Ken War is being shocked heavily by the cage, Inferno pulls Ken War away from the cage and he slams him into the spike nails. Inferno grabs one of the mystery boxes and opens it up, he pulls out a baseball bat. He starts to pound on Ken War with the baseball bat. Inferno throws the bat down and he picks up another mystery box and it explodes in Inferno's arm and Inferno flies back from the shock! Inferno picked up one of the explosive boxes and he paid! Inferno is completely out cold! Ken War has made it up to his feet and he grabs Inferno and delivers a suplex! Ken War grabs a mystery box and he pulls out some barbwire and he wraps it around Inferno's neck and he starts to choke Inferno with it! Inferno isn't having a good time in there. The barbwire is slicing into Inferno's neck and it is choking the crap out of him. Inferno grabs Ken War by the neck and tries to deliver a snap mare takeover, it is successful but the barbwire cuts Inferno's neck badly! Inferno's neck is bleeding pretty bad!

JT- Come on Inferno! Win this thing!

Nikki- This match is getting pretty nasty.

GP- Inferno pulls Ken War up and he has him set up for a powerbomb, and he delivers it! Powerbomb into the spikenails! There are nails in Ken War's back! Inferno pulls Ken War to his feet again and he delivers a rock bottom manuever! Inferno is trying to drive those nails even deeper into Ken War's back! Ken War is lieing on his back and Inferno is stomping onto Ken War's chest! Inferno drives an elbow down on Ken War and War screams in pain. I think some of those nails may have hit a vital organ or something.

JT- I sure hope so.

GP- Ken War is steel feeling some major pain from those nails! Inferno throws Ken War on his back right into one of the mystery boxes and some rope hangs out of the box. Inferno loops the rope around the cage openings carefull so that he isn't shocked and then he hangs Ken War on the rope. Inferno grabs the baseball bat and he starts beating Ken War as he is hanging by his neck on the rope! And Inferno swings hard and Ken War swings back and rams right into the electric cage! Inferno sees the barbwire Ken War was using to choke him with and he wraps it around the bat and starts to hit Inferno with it some more. Ken War grabs the barbwire off the bat and Inferno keeps beating on War with the plain bat. Ken War starts to cut the rope with the barbwire, Inferno sees now what Ken War is doing and Inferno grabs some of the spikenails and puts them under Ken War. Ken War has cut the rope now and he falls, but he slams right into some more spike nails! Oh my! Inferno grabs Ken War, he has him set up for the Backdraft, and he connects! BACKDRAFT ON WAR! The ref is counting for Ken War to be koed, 1..2..3..4..5..6..7..8..9..10! Ken War is out cold! Inferno has won the first match of the 3! Inferno is up by 1! Inferno gets out of the cage and walks to the back, Ken War wakes up and starts to walk to the back as well. Later tonight we will see match 2, and maybe match 3!


Nikki- He he he.

Nikki- So Inferno gets away with round 1 of the 3 part duel of death with Ken War!!

JT- Neither man can take another match like that. It was disgusting, vile!! I loved every minute of it!

GP- We've got the ring here at the MCI Center setup, so let's get to it!

Pep Westin v. Shadow

JT: What a match this should be as partners in E4 meet!

GP: This one is scheduled for a 15 minute time limit as referee Lou Biffoli hits the ring.

Nikki: I wonder the mental condition Pep Westin is in for this one. He seems to be going through rough times.

JT: I couldn't agree more. I'd like to see what fellow E4 Members do during this one.

GP: Shadow and Pep Westin, both members of The Enforcers have been booked to meet one on one tonight as we open Desperate Measures!

JT: I don't think either was too happy about the situation but it is the Prez's way of saying that they need to get more involved for real angles. And both mean have picked up the game to a different level. GP: I doubt Larson will be out here. He's real psyched for his title match. But XTreme may not be here because he doesn't have plans for tonight. I guess time will tell...

JT: And speaking of time...

{"Dragula" by Rob Zombie plays and the lights cut off. A blue neon light strobes the arena as Shadow runs and rolls in the ring.}

Nikki: What an entrance!

GP: Pep has something to show too....

{"Bring da Pain" plays and the speakers are really hitting hard. Westin looks serious. He heads to ringside....}

Nikki: No XTreme? No Larson?

GP: Both men are in the ring standing face to face. Shadow extends his hand..

JT: Westin seems a bit hesitant as he walks slowly around the ring. He comes back and. They Shake! Both men have decided to fight this one out of friendship!

Nikki: Isn't that sweet?!?!

GP: No!

JT: Both men are in the corners and the bell rings. What is Shadow doing?!?! He walks over to Westin and holds his face out! He's asking to be hit!!!


JT: Shadow is a nut! He was just leveled by one of the strongest arms in the IWO!

GP: What's going on now!? Shadow takes the mic.....

Shadow: I never wanted this to happen! I never knew you had that much fire behind that right arm. Look at my face!

(Camera zooms in to show knuckle marks across the cheek of Shadow...)

Shadow: I'm not fighting you! I will sit in this chair and wait until you leave this ring because you are the better man my friend! And it would be a travesty if E4 lost you.

(Shadow brings in a chair and sits......)

Shadow: Will you leave? I'll even give you the win! It's yours!

(Westin turns around and steps through the ropes showing little remorse.)

JT: What's going on?!?!?! Shadow just set the chair up by the ropes and he has grabbed another one!

GP: O MY GOD!!! O SH*T!!!!!!


(Nikki is shown with tears rolling down her face.....)

Nikki: That's Terrible!!!!


GP: Here comes the EMS squad with stretcher ready. They pick Westin up on it and begin to carry him off as Shadow laughs and talks to a few people in the crowd!

JT: O No! Not this! Westin is back up and takes out the EMS guys! He's running towards Shadow with the stretcher!

GP: And Shadow is still turned around even though the crowd is roaring!

JT: Westin sets up the stretcher in the middle of the ring and taps Shadow on the shoulder! O NO! HE JUST BENCHED PRESSED HIM STRAIGHT UP AND TOSSED HIM ON THE STRETCHER!!!!!!

GP: He's gonna feel that in the morning. And Westin used every ounce of energy he had as both men are down. Westin grabs the mic that was in the ring already....

Westin: Looks like you helped yourself onto the stretcher, now I take you in as planned!

GP: Westin is dragging the broken stretcher up the aisle! He is at the entrance and they are not to be seen!

JT: Can we get a camera back there? We don't seem to have a live feed but we can try to get some information about what is going on!

GP: I think I know! Here comes Shadow, and this time he is dragging the stretcher with Pep in it!

Nikki: Now it's just plain confusing. Well Shadow has dumped Westin in the ring and the match officially begins.

GP: They are both worn out but are exchanging powerful blows!

JT: O No! Not again! Shadow is asking for it once again! And Westin doesn't stutter! He sends the right fist straight to the opposite jaw and Shadow jus won't learn!

GP: He's out cold! Westin is laughing so hard he is rolling around on the mat!

Nikki: Look at those arms! Westin has been in the weight room. GO PEP!!!!

GP: Do you ever learn?

Nikki: Why should I?

JT: Well Shadow is sitting up still dazed and Westin meets him with a missile dropkick and Shadow is back to where he was. Laid out on the mat.

GP: This is all too absurd, I am having trouble paying attention! Pep Westin is making a shadow out of this man.

Nikki: That was SO not funny.

GP: Speaking of funny! I have a GREAT joke for you guys!

JT: O lord!

GP: When does a boy scout become a man???

Nikki and JT: Who knows GP? WHEN?!

GP: When he eats his first brownie!

(Nikki and JT try to hold back but instead bust out laughing......)

JT: O god, back to the match. Westin still seems to be in control as he wears Shadow down with a sleeper hold that has Shadow to one knee. Shadow begins fighting back with elbows to the stomach and both men are on their feet. Shadow pushes him chest first into the ropes and then dropkicks him in the back right over the ropes!!

GP: Shadow is one dangerous character! Westin is dazed but not highly affected as Shadow moves to the outside and they being brawling.

JT: This isn't a fight of friendship, I can tell you that right now. These men HATE each other. I'm contemplating how it all turns out.

Nikki: That's a big word for you JT!

JT: I'm not the one that can't read and chew gum at the same time!

Nikki: JERK!

GP: Okay, we have a match taking place here as both men seem so fatigued but both hold so much power behind each shot. This one isn't ending anytime soon! Shadow tosses Westin into the ring. Westin quickly pop up though and takes control with a kick to the stomach and a demanding DDT!

JT: I haven't seen a DDT performed so well since Inferno was in the ring!




Nikki: Everyone ignore that blubbering idiot that calls himself JT and let GP call this thing the right way.

GP: Very technical with both men building up energy for an explosive finish.

Nikki: I'd have to go with Westin after seeing those arms! I like a man that can-

GP: Let's stop right there and focus back on the match at hand...

JT: Shadow seems to have the kind of control he likes as he sets up for a vertical suplex....


(The lights go out and "Ruff Ryder's Anthem" by DMX plays. Lights still out, a blue strobe light flashes the arena and a spotlight follows the man walking to ringside.)

GP: It's XTreme!!! Both men are staring at him in awe. He is in great shape and quite the demeaning character. The lights go back and Westin catches Shadow off guard with a Side Russian Leg Sweep as XTreme just looks on....

JT: Meanwhile Shadow is getting destroyed in the ring! Things look real bad for this talent. Pep has this one in the bag.

GP: He does not. Shadow has plenty of time to retaliate!

JT: Whatever you say! O NO! WHAT THE HELL!

(Slow bass beat starts and the words "SHUT UP!" then the song "Nobody Loves Me" by Limp Bizkit and no one comes out. But it struck a nerve in Shadow!}









(Billy Larson comes out microphone in hand)

Larson: You never could cut it Peppy!

(Larson runs down to ringside and XTreme blindsides Westin and knocks him out with the XTreme Driver!)

Shadow: Westin, you and The Enforcers are through! You aren't good enough to even consider fighting me or anyone in E4!

XTreme: And here's your goodbye kiss!

(Larson and Shadow stomp on the man and exit, but Westin grabs XTreme on the foot and trip him)

GP: WHAT THE HELL?! Westin is up and he's pissed!

JT: Westin smacks XTreme hard right across the face!!!

GP: He's getting a chair!!!!

JT: He has XTreme tied in the turnbuckle! And he's CLOBBERING HIM IN THE HEAD WITH A STEEL CHAIR!


Fans: 1!!!!!






(Westin gets in the opposite corner and starts running towards XTreme.....)


GP: O .......... My.......... God.......

(Silence throughout the crowd as XTreme falls out of the ring in a pool of blood outside the ring as everyone stares in horror.....)

(Westin takes the Mic.....)

Westin: Call that foreSHADOWING..........

(Westin leaves the arena as everyone stares at him in pure silence....)

[A clip of all the great moments of XTreme's IWO Career and Prez Jamie giving him the proper departure words as we see the end of XTreme's IWO Career....]

GP- *SIGH*. Another career ended in the IWO. We're sorry to see you go Xtreme...maybe you'll return yet.

Nikki- Hey, you never know. Look at what ?¿? went through, he's still around!

Grudge Match
Mike Haven v. High Flyer

JT: But besides that.....what a match we all just witnessed!

Nikki: I bet we see Pep Westin Vs Shadow again somewhere down the road. That was an amazing match and an amazing finish.

GP: We have a great match coming up as the night really heats up! High Flyer will meet Mike Haven in what should be a very intense match!

JT: Both men have picked up lost pieces to try for a good win here at Desperate Measures!

GP: Man we have a great lineup tonight including a GREAT DOUBLE MAIN EVENT.

JT: Satan Vs ?¿? which has been incredibly heated!

GP: And then Titan Vs "The Blue Chipper" Scott Morris for the coveted IWO World Title!

Nikki: I think Vietnam Veteran Vs Zombie for a shot at the World Title next PPV!!!

GP: Now let's get to the ring for some action!

("Smells Like Teen Spirit" by Nirvana plays as Mike Haven walks out from the back. Always confident, Haven stands in the ring awaiting High Flyer.)

Nikki: Man is Mikey looking good!

GP: This is really what we all needed. Nikki picks the winner!

Nikki: Shut up.

GP: You shut up!

JT: BOTH of you shut up!

GP: She started it.

("Americana" by Offspring plays as High Flyer some flying out from the back!)

GP: Here we go!

JT: Both men come out punching as Haven takes the upper hand and moves Flyer into a corner. He sends Flair chops straight to the chest of Flyer and does nothing but pumps Flyer up as he switches positions with Haven and gives him the chops.

GP: Flyer whips Haven into the opposite turnbuckle and meets him with a splash. He trips Haven into the center of the ring and starts kicking Haven in the side as Haven gasps in pain.

Nikki: Mikey will be back up in no time!

GP: You would know.

JT: Would you two grow up?!

GP: Ahhhh shut up JT! High Flyer picks Haven up and goes for a vertical suplex but Haven puts all his leverage into it and reverses it straight into an inverted atomic drop as Flyer hops around the ring.

Nikki: Now that's what I'm talking about!

JT: Haven uses his size to an advantage as he runs circles around the much confused High Flyer and finally rolls him up for a fast two count

GP: High Flyer doesn't look all that happy. He grabs High Flyer by the neck and tosses him to the opposite side!!

JT: Neither of these men has overwhelming size but High Flyer just manhandled The Shocker!

GP: I think High Flyer has a little bit of southern boy quality!

JT: Speaking of southern boys! How do you circumcise a redneck?!

Nikki and GP: We don't know! HOW?

JT: Kick his Sister in the Jaw!

(Laughter among the three as the match progresses.....)

GP: High Flyer is still in control as he tosses Haven over the top rope onto some wires on the outside,


GP: Boy can he get up! Both men are sprawled out around the outside as Haven inches his way up. High Flyer seems to hit his knee hard on the way down.

JT: Haven ties High Flyer up in the guardrail and sets him on the rail! HE'S GOING TO THE TOP TURNBUCKLE!


Nikki: YEA!!!!! GO MIKEY!!!

JT: Mike Haven is laughing hysterically on the outside.

JT: Haven applying a headscissors takedown on Flyer. Flyer rolling out of the ring, slamming his hands down on the apron in anger, when Haven answers with a suicide dive, sending both men spilling to the floor in a heap!

GP: Haven the first to his feet, and he measures Flyer up for a knife edge chop, he's going for another, but Flyer with a poke to the eye.

JT: And look at this, Flyer sends Haven head first into those steel steps, oh my!

GP: That's called the steps to success, by GP.

JT: Yeah, whatever. Flyer approaches Haven, only to get a face full of that steel ring post, this is turning nasty folks, might be a good time to send the little ones away...

GP: Hell, let them watch, show them the joy of hurting others!

JT: GP! For the love of god! Be responsible, for once in awhile?

GP: I am responsible, like responsible for carrying this announcing team. You gotta admit, I'm the reason people tune into IWO, to hear my eloquent discussion of the show.

JT: I won't even respond to that. Both men find their way back to the ring, Haven with a knee to the gut to Flyer, and sends him flying to the turnbuckles. He's positioning him on the ropes, frankensteiner!! The cover attempt...only a two.

GP: It'll take more than that to put Flyer's shoulders to the mat for the one, two, three.

JT: Side headlock applied by Haven...Flyer propels Haven into the ropes, and hits with a big powerslam...the cover! Kickout on two.

GP: Both guys pulling out all the stops. Flyer just tossed Haven outside the ropes, and he joins him, and he's looking for the nearest chair at ringside!

JT: He's got one, and swings, but Haven ducks, that chair slamming against the steel ring post Haven with a dropkick to the back, and Flyer is sent into the guardrail, where the fans greet him!

GP: Haven now pasting Flyer with a few forearms shots, and now Flyer answers with a slamming of the face of Haven into the guardrail, the fans are going ballistic.

Nikki: This match is boring. I want quality!

GP: Your definition of quality is a two hour episode of Dawson's Creek!

JT: Now listen to the two of you! GET ALONG!

GP: A great answer there by Flyer to Haven's initial onslaught, not letting Haven roll right over him. Flyer now taking it to Haven, a series of knife edge chops, and he follows with a flying knee. Haven's still on his feet amazingly, but Flyer off the ropes with a spinning heel kick, and Haven goes down hard.

JT: Flyer letting Haven get to his feet, standing dropkick attempt, but Haven swats it out of the way, and Haven with a elbow drop right across Flyer's chest. A sure fire way to hurt someone there, as demonstrated by Haven.

GP: Haven now with an irish whip of Flyer into the ropes, Haven catches him and slaps on a sleeper hold! Right in the center of the ring, Flyer's fading, but wait, jawbreaker nicely applied, and Flyer escapes while Haven is left to pick up his precious teeth.

JT: Both men taking a moment to gather themselves before continuing, and it looks like Haven is bleeding from the lip from that last shot. Haven takes a swing at Flyer, Flyer ducks, and hits with a Release German Suplex. He rolls Haven up for a cover, but only a one count.

GP: Gonna take more than that to put away Haven.

GP: Lockup now, and Haven applies a textbook wristlock, tucking it behind Flyer's back, but here's Flyer with a snapmare, and now Flyer applies a rear chinlock.

JT: Haven though, twists his way out of it, kick to the gut, and Haven with a solid DDT! He goes for a cover, kickout on two by Flyer.

GP: Nikki looking on with pleasure, as her man is on the good end here, right now. Haven quickly follows up with a Russian Legsweep, and Haven now connects with a running powerbomb, this could be it folks, the cover by Haven..One, Two,!

Nikki: Damn!

JT: Flyer with an amazing kickout there, I thought he was done for. Now Flyer goes on the offensive, right...left, irish whip into the ropes, flying lariat takes Haven off his feet!

GP: Flyer taking to the ropes now, Haven getting to his feet, Flyer with a hurricanrana! He has one leg hooked, One, Two, No!! Narrow escape by Haven that time, Flyer almost pulled this one out of the bag!

JT: Close match here folks, Flyer continues to pound on Haven, and now he's using what he calls the Freak Out. Haven staggers out of the corner, and it's Flyer with a Bulldog off the ropes. He rolls Haven over for a cover attempt...One, Two, Thr...Haven with a shoulder up.

GP: I gotta say this has been a great battle, of course neither man would have stood a chance against the Prince of Pain, but then, who would?

JT: Don't make me compile a list, GP. Flyer lifts Haven to his feet, and Haven promptly delivers a forearm smash to the jaw of Flyer. Looks like Flyer was caught offguard by that one, scoopslam by Haven.

GP: Haven approaches Flyer now...but gets a kick to the chops for his effort. Flyer with an irish whip into the ropes, splash by Flyer! He's positioning Haven on the top ropes, what's he have in store now!?








JT: Haven better hit the weights before he steps back in this one.

GP: The night is still young and we already have two winners, one ended career and plenty of blood!

JT- That was a hard fought match....but this is the real deal now!!

High Heel Shoe Match!!!
Summer vs. Angel

GP - Well, what can I say about this next match. It was made Wednesday at Hostile Meltdown. Lets take a look at what went down...


Summer - Hey bitch, I thought you were tougher than this. Are you going to let a little SHOE get you down!!! I'll tell you what. If you think you are so big and bad, then you'll accept my challenge. I'm tired of hearing you run your mouth about me EVERYTIME I came out here on Hostile Takeover. You've always been a bitch as far as I'm concerned.

(Angel is slowly getting up.)

Summer - Yeah, that's it bitch, get up. Face me... Sunday Night... Desperature Measures... You want damn Desperature Measures? You're gonna get them. Me against you in a HIGH HEEL SHOE MATCH!!! What's that you ask oh bitchy one? That means we come to the ring wearing nothing but a BRA and PANTIES!!! If they get ripped off in the match, so be it. No shoes, no jewelry, no metal under garments, and in your case, no sex toy shoved up your *****!!!

(The crowd cheers.)

Summer - A high heel shoe will be given to you and one will be given to me. That's our only weapon. So, I guess in other words, hope you are ready to get your ass beat. Oh and by the way, the loser will strip down... Hell, even if I beat you, I'll still strip down to show the fans how much MORE of a woman I AM!!!

(The crowd is on its feet. They are cheering like never before. Dear lord it so LOUD!!!)


Nikki - Well, as we know, JT here has been waiting for this match since Wednesday. He even passed out Wednesday when the match was announced. All he cares about is seeing this women naked. I guess that would be the first time ever on a wrestling pay per view that someone was naked.

GP - Once again the IWO makes history without even knowing it. I don't know how President Jamie likes the idea of this match, but from what I here this could be the first and last match between these two ladies.

JT - You know why? It is all because he doesn't know what fun is. He sees a woman and sees a woman, he doesn't see a sex symbol or a money maker. I wonder if he even likes the female type!?!

GP - JT, I'm sure he really loves you making those remarks about him. You ever hear the word, fired?

JT - No thanks, It isn't that cold in here, I don't think a fire is needed.

Nikki - Ok JT, even for you, that was lame.

GP - Do you guys really think this match will actually have wrestling moves? I mean come on, these two ladies, and I use that term lightly, want to kill each other. All I see in this match is hair pulling and maybe clothes ripping.

JT - Greg, they are going to be wrestling in their bra and panties. There's not many clothes to rip. And the last thing I want to see is beautiful hair flying all over the place. And I definetly don't want bruises or scratches.

Nikki - Oh get over yourself. It doesn't matter what they get, you'll never be able to touch them anyway!!!

JT - But I do have this...

(JT pulls out a camera and smiles.)

JT - I'm ready!!!

GP - Why don't you go on up there and get a closer look at this. We can handle the broadcast area while you are gone.

Nikki - Yeah Greg is right, we want you to be happy. You should be at ringside instead of sitting this far away. So go on JT!!!

JT - You mean you guys would cover for me!?!

GP - YES!!! We'd love to!!! Go ahead!!!

(JT gets up from his announcer's seat and heads over to stand right beside the ring. Nikki and Greg high g five each other.)

GP - That's one way to get rid of him!!! Now if only this match would go a long time but we both know that it won't.

Nikki - You never know what this match will have in store for us!!! And with JT at ringside, anything is possible!!!

GP - I think we've talked enough Nikki. Lets head up to the ring announcer for the opening of the High Heel Shoe Match!!!

(The Ring Announcer gets into the ring. He has that microphone of his. And since this is a pay per view that microphone is modeling off its very own line of Summer Bathing Suits, "Microphonetastic". Amazing how they microphone can fill out a g-string like that...)

Ring Announcer - This match is a special attraction match here at Desperate Measures... It is a High Heel Match... The rules to this match are simple. Each woman will be given a high heel shoe before the match starts. Any other weapon is illegal to use. The women will be wrestling in their bra and panties, and nothing else.

(The crowd pops up (no silly) out of their seats and cheers. Well, the male fans do, the female fans, except for the lesbians in the audience look pissed off. If my man cheered for the announcment of girls in their bra and panties, I'd get mad too!!!)

Ring Announcer - And now, lets bring out the women!!!

(The crowd cheers even louder.)

Ring Announcer - Introducing first... She has played a major role in the Capital Punishment and Mad Max feud that will explode later on here tonight. She has stolen Mad Max's heart and given hers to Capital Punishment, she is the hostess of Hostile Takeover and she says that she is the only true woman in the IWO... I give to you... ANGEL!!!

(Angel comes out. She is in her bra and panties, that's it. She is carrying a black high heel shoe in her hand. The crowd is going crazy. Angel is about to climb the ring steps. JT goes over and starts snapping photos of her. She goes over to him and starts smacking his camera with her high heel shoe. The camera goes into a million pieces. She shoves JT back and she gets into the ring. JT is in shock.)

GP - Damn it, I knew something like that would happen. That's just going to bring him back over here for the rest of the night. Atleast we tried, right Nikki?

Nikki - I don't know, sometimes I think trying just isn't good enough when it comes to JT.

(JT heads back over to the announcer's table. His dreams look shattered. He puts on his head set.)

GP - Are you ok JT?

JT - I don't believe it... She ruined my camera...

GP - You get to watch the tape of this over and over again.

JT - You don't understand. I had some very important pictures on that roll!!!

Nikki - What is so important???

JT - They were picture of my prize winning Spam Collection!!!

(Greg and Nikki look at each other and shake their heads.)

JT - What!?!

(Back to the ring announcer)

Ring Announcer - And her opponent...

(The crowd gets up again.)

Ring Announcer - She is currently deep into the feud with Jason Nash and Billy Larson, but who's side is she really on? Later tonight we will find that out. But right now, she has to step into this ring and take on a person that she calls a "bitch". Even though it isn't July.. I give to you... SUMMER!!!

(Summer comes out.. She is in her bra and panties, that's all. She is carrying a high heel shoe. She is waving to the fans. All the male fans are getting their moneys worth here in this one. Summer tries to climb the ring steps but Angel swings her shoe at her. The ref goes over and tells Angel to let Summer into the ring. Summer finally gets into the ring. The ref is asking for that wet 'n' wild microphone.)

Ref - Ok, I've been ask to check you ladies out to make sure you don't have any weapons on you.

GP - Oh come on!!! If you actually think they could have any weapons on them you are insane.

JT - Maybe he just wants a damn thrill!!! LIKE ME!!!

(The ref goes over to Angel and looks her over, he sees that she is wearing earrings. He shakes his head and points to them.)

Ref - Take them out!!!

Angel - WHY!?!

Ref - The rules of this match were you can't wear any jewelry, because it can be used as weapons!!!

Angel - FUCK YOU!!!

Ref - Take it off or you'll be disqualified!!!

(Angel removes her earrings. The ref looks the rest of her over and sees nothing. He turns to look at Summer. He points to her hand and her foot. She has on a ring and a toering.)

Ref - Take them off!!!

Summer - this is stupid!!!

Ref - Do you want me to disqualify you too!?!

(Summer proceeds to take off her ring and toering. The ref puts them in his shirt pocket along with Angel's earrings. He then turns back to Angel.)

Ref - Let me check the rest of you.

(The ref sticks his hand out and starts feeling on Angel's breasts. She jerks away.)

Angel - What the hell are you doing!?!

Ref - You could have your nipples pierced!!!

(The ref turns to Summer and does the same thing.)

JT - That bastard!!!

Nikki - He is doing this on purpose. This should cost him his job!!!

GP - I can't believe this!!!

(The ref now sticks his hand into his pocket. He pulls out a rubber glove!!!)


JT - The son of a bitch!!!

Nikki - He wouldn't...

(The ref points to Angel's crotch.)

Angel - WHAT!?!

Ref - You could have something...

(Angel smacks the ref.. It spins him around... Summer catches him.. SWINGING NECKBREAKER!!! The ref is down... Angel into the ropes, she drops an elbow down across the ref's chest!!! Summer and Angel look at each other... THEY SHAKE HANDS!!!)

Angel - I was wrong about you... Now lets give the fans what they want!!!

(The crowd cheers.)

Summer picks the ref up. She slings him into the ropes... he comes back... DOUBLE DROPKICK!!! Angel grabs the ref by the legs, she slaps on a figure four!!! Summer drops a legdrop across the face of the ref. The crowd is going crazy. Angel lets the ref go. Summer pulls the ref up, sets him up for a piledriver!!! Angel spikes it!!! The ref goes down to the mat hard!!! Summer starts punching away on the ref. Angel is getting one of the high heel shoes!!! Summer pulls the ref up and slings him into the ropes.. He comes back.. HIGH HEEL TO THE FACE!!!

JT - As much as I like seeing this, these means none of them will be getting naked!!! NO!!! MY LIFE IS OVER!!!

Nikki - Wanna leave now while you still have time!?!

JT - Time for what???

Nikki - Uh... nevermind...

GP - This is great!!! These two are working together, everything seems to be fine with the women of the IWO.

(The ref is out. Summer and Angel raise each other's hand. They hug...)

JT - DO IT!!!

(Summer is asking for the microphone back.)

Summer - You know Angel, I've been screwed by Larson, and you've been screwed by Capital Punishment. We don't get any respect from them. They use us as distraction, even though we are damn good at it, we shouldn't be used just for that. So, I think maybe it is time we showed the men what they are missing!!!

(The crowd cheers even though they have no idea what she is talking about.)

(Summer drops the microphone, she walks over to Angel... THEY START TO KISS EACH OTHER!!!)


Nikki - SICK!!!

GP - I just don't know what to say...

(Their lips are still locked... THERE'S SOME TOUNGE!!! Their arms are now wrapped around each other. Summer is running her hand through Angel's hair.)

GP - Ok, this is turning into a damn porno, can someone please do something about this!?!


GP - Yes!!!


GP - The IWO isn't about PORN!!!

(The scene cuts to the back. We see Summer and Angel sitting in the locker room area.)

Summer - Hahahaha!!! We pulled a fast one over on them. Those people actually thought we were going to do something. Those people will just about cheer for anything, especially when it comes to us.

Angel - Yeah, I know, we played them for fools. I'm just glad Titan cut out the lights when he did, god knows what would have happened if we had kept going.

Summer - Wonder if it would have been fun!?!

Angel - I don't know...

Summer - Well...

Angel - Well, what!?!

(Summer looks up at the camera.)

Summer - Cut that off a while, this may be even too extreme for pay per view!!

Summer & Angel - *giggles*

(The scene cuts back to the announcer's table. All three are just sitting there in shock. Of course JT is the first to speak.)

JT - Well, this was a great pay per view, sorry it is over so fast, well, I'm going to the locker room now, I'll see you guys later!?!

GP - NO!!! Desperate Measures is long from over, it has basically just started, and we don't need to know what's going on in the back between those two.

Nikki - This is sick. I think I'm gonna barf.

JT - I did the other day, It feels good after you get it all out.

GP - Ok!!! Lets stop talking about that!!!

JT - What do you want to talk about, Lesbians!?!

GP - NO!!!

JT - Then what!?!


JT - If you want to talk about me all you had to do was ask...

GP - Fans... lets just MOVE ON!!!

Jax Stone vs Deathrow

JT- The best pay per-veiw has to have its matches of losers. And this one will be it.

GP- You know you have a bad attitude. I think it's because you wish that ladies match wasn't done.

JT- Who cares about the ladies? Why would I care about the....Hellllooo Nikki.

Nikki- Ha, no. I wonder where the ref is?

Ring Announcer- Coming down the aisle first weighing two-hundred and ninety seven pounds. He is one of America's MOst wanted thugs ... Death RoooooW!

::"2 of America's most Wanted blares through the packed arena. Deathrow walks out to a mix reaction::

Ring Announcer- Coming to the ring next weighing two hundred and fifty five pounds. He is the Elimanator Jax Stone! Accompanied to the ring by John " the best Manager Ever" Smythe.

::Living dead girl blares next and Jax Stone walks out and gets into the ring.::

GP- Where is the ref? We need him to start the match.

JT- Maybe they went on strike because they don't want to do sucky matches.

GP- Wait here comes the Prez!

JT- Booo!

::President Jamie walks out wearing a suit and holding a mic::

President Jamie- Since the ref who was suppose to do this match got sick we have to bring in a replacement. Now he isn't a normal ref... well he isn't a normal at all. Presenting to you all the special ref for the match... The Raging One!

::"Bueck Dich" by Rammstein begins to blast through the P.A. system. The Raging One walks out wearing a pair of ref pants His chest is painted black and white. The crowd cheers for him as he walks into the ring. Jamie walks back through the entrance way.::

GP- Well this will be very interesting.

Ring bell- Ding Ding.

GP- Well Jax and deathrow are staring at TRO(The Raging One). The Raging One is telling them to start or he is going to call this a draw. Deathrow is the first to attck with a short arm clothesline. Jax Stone goes down but hops back up quickly. They lock up and Jax over powers Deathrow throwing him to the mat. The Raging One is laughing at Deathrow. deathrow gets up looking pissed and tries for a tackle on jax Stone. Jax dodges and uses Deathrows mometum to send him into a ddt. Deathrow rolls out of the ring and seems to be taken a break. The Raging One climbs out of the ring also and is talking to Deathrow. Deathrow pushes him away and yells something at him. The Raging One just laughs and climbs back into the ring. Deathrow walks up the steels steps into the ring. As he is getting in Jax runs at him. But Deathrow sees him coming and sends deathrow flying over the top rope. Jax hits the ground with a thud and John Smythe goes over to check on him. Deathrow flys out of the ring with a cross body block taking out Jax and John. The Raging One is laughing his head off in the ring.

Nikki- Isn't he suppose to be keeping a count or something.

JT- Have you seen this guy before dumb a$$!? He isn't all their and I don't think he cares much anyway.

Nikki- Well he better not get in the way of the cute Jax Stone.

JT- Shut up

GP- Deathrow and Jax are brawling on the outside of the ring now. The Raging One has grabbed a chair and brought it into the ring. He opens it up and sits down. Jax delivers of piledriver on the outside of the ring. Jax picks him back up and sends him flying into the guard rail. Jax Stone runs at him but Deathrow sees him coming again and flips over the guard rail and into the crowd. He its the concrete and a chair on the way to the ground. The fans are cheering their a$$es off right now. Deathrow climbs over the guard rail and grabs Jax Stone. he sends Jax's head into the guard rail with a thud. The Raging One has just packed up his chair and carries it out of the ring. Deathrow is still slamming his head over and over again it the guard rail. He doesn't see The Raging One's chair flying at him but he feels it. Deathrow drops lick a ton of bricks. The Raging One drops the chair and picks them both up. He throws them over the guard rail and then steps over himself. Now he pulls Jax up and rolls him into the ring. Then he rolls Deathrow into the ring. Jax Stone gets up slowly and looks at The Raging One as he climbs into the ring. Jax just shrugs and picks up Deathrow and pump handle slams him to the mat. Jax goes for the pin and...

JT- The Raging One isn't counting!

Nikki- Be fair to the cute Jax.

Jt- Why don't you try doing something smart for a change and shut up!

GP- Are you always this hostile?

JT- MOst of the time.

GP- Jax Stone has been covering Deathrow for about a ten count. Jax gets up and is yelling at the Raging One. The Raging One has just kneed Jax in the groin. Jax falls to the ground twitching and TRO laughs some more. Deathrow and jax are both out and The Raging seems to be leaving the ring. He is waving down the cotton candy man. While the Raging One is off getting a sweet treat Deathrow is has gotten up. Deathrow taking advantage of the prone Stone bounces off the ropes and drops an elbow on the chest. Deathrow bounces off the ropes and drops another elbow on Stone. And he goes for a third but John Smythe just pulled Stone out of the ring. Deathrow is yelling for The Raging One to get into the ring. The Raging One has just gotten his cotten candy but is now talking to a girl in the crowd. deathrow is busy yelling for The Raging One while jax stone sneaks up behind him and belly to back suplexes him to the mat. Jax Stone climbs the top turnbuckle and trys for a Saton Splash. But deathrow moved out of the way and he hit all mat. The raging One is now making his way back to the ring finally. Deathrow and Jax Stone get up at same time and lock up. This time Deathrow shows great power with a gorilla press slam on Stone. Jax is picked back up and Deathrow delivers a running tiger bomb. But the raging One ain't paying attention to the match he is busy eating his cotton candy. Deathrow pushes jax's legs away and walks over to the raging One. He grabs the cotton candy and throws it out of the ring. Deathrow is now in the Raging One's face yelling at him and he has just punched the Raging One! The raging luaghs and delivers a swinging neck breaker on Deathrow. The Raging One climbs the turn buckles and sits on top. Deathrow slowly gets up and... PYGMIES PAINSTICK ON DEATHROW!! Jax Stone gets up and walks over to Deathrow. The Raging is back and the top and ... PYGMIES PAINSTICK on Stone! They are both out cold.

JT- Well this seems to be intresting thing.

Nikki- Damn it Jax get up!

Jt- I like this guy he doesn't take any sh*t

GP- The crowd is really cheering now too! The Raging One is walking over to the to lad out men. He starts smacking them around trying to wake them up. Jax Stone slowy comes to and The Raging One backs up and watches. Stone gets up and picks up Deathrow and tombstones him. Jax then falls on top of the Koed Deathrow. the raging One looks around and then finally counts 1...2...3!

Nikki- Yeah Jaxy Baby you go boy.

JT- Now that's done with time for a real match.

Four Corners Tag Team Match
Brujah v. High Intensity v. Insane Inc. v. the Big Top

JT- Desperate Measures 1999 continues! This place is rocking! And with an event to come wow we may have some great bouts still to come!

Nikki- Yes we do...We have Brujaih, The Big Top, High Intesnity, and Insane Inc. Lets head down to our announcer!

Announcer- Our first team...

["Shame" by Stabbing Westward starts to play as High Intensity comes to the ring]

Announcer- Justin Randall and Shawn Fisher...HIGH INTENSITY!!!!

[Crowd cheers as Brujaih's music comes..but no one comes as the announcer recieves a letter.]


[Crowd cheers as "House of Horrors" by ICP plays as the Big Top come to the ring]

Announcer- Great Melenco and Sin Smiley...THE BIG TOP!

{crowd cheers as "Beautiful People" By Marolyn Manson begins to Insane Inc. come to the ring.]

Announcer- Ester and Ernest...INSANE INC!

[crowd cheers as the bell rings]

Nikki- Were off. Now the rules are simple. Two men will be in the ring..And can tag any member of any team..Well it looks like Ester and Sin Simley are going to kick it off..Desperate Measures is going to be good folks!

GP- Sin grabs Ester by the hair and throws him down. Sin spits on Ester and gives him an elbow drop to the stomach of Ester.

JT- Sin tags in Melenko and the Great Melenko picks Ester up...MELINK-O-FLOW! Remember this is elimination! Melenko with the cover..1...2..and Ester gets the shoulder up.

Nikki- Melenko gets Ester in the corner..Irish whip...BULLDOG!! 1..2..and Ernest is in for the save. Melenko grabs Ester and powerslams him. Melenko over to the High Intensity corner..He tags in Shawn Fisher..Fisher in...Clothsline to Ester..Ester tags Sin Smiley..Sin in and a back body drop to Shawn Fisher.

GP- Ernest gets tagged by Smiley..Ernest gets in...spinebuster to the back of the head to Shawn Fisher! THATS IT 1..2..FISHER GETS OUT! In comes Justin Randall...VENGEANCE TO ERNEST...1....2....Ester in...3!!!

Announcer- Eliminated from team Insane Inc..ERNEST.

JT- Well he's out and now only one member from Insane Inc. is in. Now Melenko and Ester jump on each other. Ester has Melenko...DDT! Sin comes in! Brainbuster..Ester pins Sin Smiley...HES NOT THE LEGAL MAN! Ohh well 1...2...3!!

Announcer- Eliminated from team Big Top...SIN SMILEY!

Nikki- Sin and Ernest are gone and now High Intensisty have both members. Talk about luck! Justin Randall in..He gets Melenko...Powerbomb to the outside floor. This could get ugly.

GP- Melenko grabs a chair! BAMM!!! He slides in with Randall....MELENK-O-FLOW!! 1...2...3..!!

Announcer- Eliminated from team High Intensity....JUSTIN RANDALL!


Announcer- Eliminated from team Insane Inc. which is out of this match...ESTER!

Nikki- Now Shawn Fisher and The Great Melenko are left...GM with a punch..runs the ropes..dropkick!

GP- Shawn Fisher gets up and spears the Great Melenko...Fisher up..on top! FROGSPLASH!!! That should be all!! HE got out! Melenko up..Melenk-o-flow!! Wait here comes Justin Randall is out..powerbomb and then a frog splash from Fisher! 1.....2.....3!! They won it! Unbelivable!!

GP- Well, Desperate Measures is already more than I expected!! We've got camera crews waiting on the next Ken War/Inferno we go!

United States Title Match
Ken War -c- v. Inferno part 2

GP- It is now time for the 2nd match in the Inferno vs. Ken War set. Inferno won the first match, so if he wins this one he is the new US champ and he gets to go home, but if Ken War wins, we will see a 3rd match later tonight.

JT- I'm really looking forward to this next match, because Inferno is going to be crowned the new US champ right here!

Nikki- Don't get your hopes up. Ken War may be more prepared for Inferno this time.

GP- Let's show you guys the stipulations for this 2nd matchup.

Hells Dungeon Match:
Outsider the arena, a special ring is set up outside, there are electrified razorwire for ropes, c4 explosives in the turnbuckles, the outside of the ring is surrounded by blazing torches so no one can escape, every 3 minutes a special pyrotechnics device spews fire down on certain sports of the ring. Right before the torches outside there are 4 pits on each corner of the outside, the first pit has water and a bunch of piranhas inside, the other is filled with scorpions, another is filled with electrified florescent lights, and the other is filled with rubbing alcohol (so if your cut bad and you fall in, oh boy itll sting). Win by knockout.

(Inferno runs down to the ring and the crowd goes nuts, and he grabs a mic)

Inferno- War, come down here right now, screw the theme music let's just get this thing started.

(War runs down and gets in)

GP- The ropes have been wrapped in razorwire, the turnbuckles have c4 explosives in them, their are 4 pits outside the ring, one has pirahahs in them, another is filled with scorpions, the other is filled with electrified flourescent lights, and the other is filled with rubbing alcohol. Then beyond that there is a wall of torches that are set on fire, so no one escapes, and the only way you can win once again is by knock out! The bell has rung, and this one is underway! Inferno and Ken War are in a blaze of punches! Inferno is in control of this match to start off, he throws War to the razorwire ropes and the wire sticks into Ken War's back! Inferno has totally destroyed Ken War's back here tonight. Ken War starts to kick Ken War in the chest and he rolls Ken War down for a ddt! Inferno signals to throw Ken War into one of the turnbuckles and he does Ken War hits the turnbuckle doesn't explode! Inferno is pissed, Inferno charges at Ken War, War ducks out of the turbuckle and Inferno hits it and BOOM! INFERNO HAS JUST BEEN BLOWN AWAY BY A C4 EXPLOSIVE! INFERNO IS DOWN! Ken War is laughing his ass off! He grabs Inferno and throws him into another turnbuckle and BOOM! ANOTHER EXPLOSION! KEN WAR THROWS INFERNO INTO YET ANOTHER TURNBUCKLE AND INFERNO HAS RAN INTO HIS 3RD C4 EXPLOSIVE HERE TONIGHT! Ken War is now signalling to throw Inferno into the last turnbuckle, he throws and BOOM! Inferno has been hit by 4 c4 explosive's here tonight!


Nikki- Fight fire with fire.

GP- Ken War has Inferno and he throws him out of the ring and Inferno lands in the pit with all the scorpions in it! You can hear screams of imense pain coming from the pit! No! No! Inferno! Inferno's a goner! Ken War is laughing and Ken War climbs out of the pit, he has tons of giant long cuts on himself and he is shaking. Ken War grabs Inferno and slams him into the pit filled with pirahnas! Inferno hits with a big splash and he is screaming again! KEN WAR IS DOMINATING INFERNO IN THIS MATCH! Inferno climbs out of this pit, he is a big bloody mess now. Inferno is cut up and soaking wet. Ken War grabs Inferno and slams him into the pit of flourescent lights! INFERNO IS BEING SHOCKED IMMSENSLEY! YOU CAN SEE SPARKS FLYING FROM THE PIT! INFERNO IS OUT OF THE PIT AND HE IS SHAKING AND BLEEDING IMMENSLEY! KEN WAR HAS INFERNO AGAIN AND HE THROWS HIM INTO THE PIT OF RUBBING ALCOHOL! INFERNO IS SCREAMING AGAIN! KEN WAR HAS THIS MATCH IN THE BAG! THAT'S THE BOTTOM LINE! KEN WAR HAS INFERNO BY THE TORCHES! INFERNO IS ON FIRE! THE RUBBING ALCOHOL IS EXTREMELY FLAMMABLE! INFERNO IS ON FIRE! INFERNO IS RUNNING AROUND AND HE IS ON FIRE! INFERNO JUMPS INTO THE PIT OF WATER AND PIRANAHS! HE IS BEING ATTACKED BY THE PIRAHNAS BUT HE IS NO LONGER ON FIRE!

JT- Oh, man, Inferno is gone.

Nikki- Sorry JT.

GP- Ken War has Inferno on the top rope, THE DROP! THE DROP! The ref is counting for Inferno, 1..2..3..4..5..6..7..8..9..10! Ken War has won! Ken War has won! WE ARE GOING TO SEE A 3RD MATCH LATER TONIGHT! Ken War has left back to the back, and Inferno is up and making his way back there now as well.

Extreme Title #1 Contender Match
The Raging One v. Dark Wolf

GP: Ken War has evened up the odds!! Welcome back to the MCI Center, for those watching on TV....up next, The Raging One and Dark Wolf for a shot at the Extreme Title!

JT: The very same title, I might add, that Mad Max will be defending tonight. And defending successfully I might add!

Nikki: How can you be so biast.

JT: Cause Inferno's my buddy, my pal. His friends are my friends.

GP: Oh, I see. So Titan is your friend then?

JT: Yep.

GP: And who will win tonight's title match?


GP: Well, that just settles that, Titan will defend his title here tonight. At least, from the words of our resident expert on wrasslin, JT.

JT: Why thank you, Greg. Not only that, but I feel that Dark Wolf will win this match... NOT!!!

Nikki: Why would you root for The Raging One?


GP: You like Coco Crispy's?

JT: Well.... sometimes.

Nikki: I eat Frosted Flakes!


Nikki: WHAT?!?



Nikki: Well....... they are.


Nikki: Shut up you two!


Nikki: Grrrrrrr......

JT: Uh....

GP: Oh.....





Nikki: There! That should teach you two a lesson.

JT: Yes ma'am!

GP: Whatever you say ma'am!

Nikki: That's better!

JT: How so?

Nikki: You two are calling me ma'am. Keep calling me that, and you might get places. Like Jason Nash.

JT: Oh. OH!!!

GP: Down boy, down!

[Someone hands the announcer the.... MICROPHONE OF THE HOUR!!! OH (BLEEP!!!) YEAH!!! It's decked out in it's finest attire, the cutest mic ever. No mic could ever stand against this mic, the best darn mic in the industry. Not only does the IWO have the finest talent in the world, but the best mics! That's why it is the greatest fed ever!]

Announcer: Now making his way to the ring, standing at 6' 6", and weighing in at 260 lbs... DARK WOLF!!!

["Hunt or be Hunted" Dark Wolf's theme song by IWO resident music genius John Bovistein begins to play throughout the arena as Dark Wolf enters the ring.]

Announcer: And now introducing, he is a self proclaimed pygmy champion, he measures at 6' 1", and weighs 290 lbs., in other words, he is a little, stocky man.... THE RAGING ONE!!!

["Bueck Dich" by Rammstein begins to blast it's German Death Metal over the P.A. system. TRO makes his way down to the ring with Winky the penguin at his side.]

GP: Hmmmm... anyone else still sad over Team Rocket?

Nikki: No doubt that they were one of the better tag teams in the IWO. They even had an IC title reign, giving those belts to the Texas Rangers. Who lost the very same belts to Era of our Kind, and were enslaved by them.

JT: Can you say that... one more time?

Nikki: No doubt that they were one of the better tag teams in the IWO. They even had an IC title reign, giving those belts to the Texas Rangers. Who lost the very same belts to Era of our Kind, and were enslaved by them. *Whew*

JT: You sound like a soap opera!

Nikki: Well...

GP: Anyway, on to the action. TRO and Wolf circling each other, both of these guys have fought once before. Raging One came away with the big win the last time. Let's see if he can pull it off again.

JT: Anyone else notice how Greg is here announcing, and not getting locked away in the loony bin, or getting seriously injured by some IWO wrestler? My, your career is looking on the up and up, isn't it?

GP: Why... I guess your right JT. Wow, the loony bin sure was scary. AND SO WAS THAT! What a DDT that came out of nowhere by TRO! He just grabbed Wolf's head, and planted it into the mat. Dark Wolf is rolling back and forth from the pain. Raging One picks him back up, and slaps on an armbar. TRO transitions from the armbar to a... bulldog! Two major power moves right off the bat from The Raging One, impressive.

Nikki: Oh yeah, Raging One is going to the top!

JT: Already? Isn't that a little dangerous?

GP: For once in his life, JT is correct! Dark Wolf is back up, and TRO is only to the middle turnbuckle. Dark Wolf nails him with a right hand, and grabs a fistful of his trunks. He lifts him up for the superplex! NO! CORKSCREW TOMBSTONE OFF THE TOP ROPE!!! I NEVER THOUGHT I'D SEE A MOVE LIKE THAT FROM DARK WOLF!!!

JT: Neither... did I.

GP: TRO is laid out in the center of the ring, and Wolf is just laughing at the maneuver he just managed to pull off. I don't think he expected himself to pull off something like that.

Nikki: I don't think anybody did.

GP: Well, Dark Wolf is nearing his victim once again. That was one heck of a move he pulled off earlier.

Nikki: Your telling me, I wonder why he isn't going for the pin.

JT: Cause he is slapping on a Texas Cloverleaf!

GP: You know what that even is?

JT: Well, you work in wrestling for a while, you learn some things.

Nikki: Some being the key word here.


GP: The Raging One isn't even wincing in that Cloverleaf. He is fighting to get to the ropes, but Wolf has that locked on pretty tight. TRO is about two feet from the ropes, crawling inch by inch. Dark Wolf is pulling back harder and harder, you can see a grimace in the face of The Raging One start to appear. HE GOT IT!!! He got to the ropes, and the referee is ordering Wolf to break the hold.

Nikki: I can't believe Raging One has anything left after that top rope move Wolf pulled off.

GP: Well, he must be into his second wind early, as he nails Dark Wolf with a clothesline. Dark Wolf right back up, and TRO with a Body Slam. Elbow drop on to Dark Wolf's throat! Raging One picks Wolf back up to his feet, and nails a belly-to-belly suplex. Raging One to the ropes, he bounces, and a vertical splash! Dark Wolf is holding his stomach in pain, as that 290 pounds just crashed down on him. The Raging One with a cover, this could be it... 1... 2... and a kickout by Dark Wolf!

Nikki: Both men are back to their feet, and raring to go. Dark Wolf goes for a clothesline, but wait! THE RAGING ONE CATCHES HIM!!!


JT: Ummm... why is TRO coming out here?

GP: That would be a good question, but heck, this is extreme style. So there, that is your answer. Raging One picks up a chair and throws it back into the ring. He goes over to the corner, and is setting the chair up in-between the top and bottom turnbuckle. Wolf is slowly getting to his feet, and The Raging One goes back over to attend to him. A whip by TRO... REVERSED!!! Dark Wolf send The Raging One right into that chair!

Nikki: Raging One is holding his back like no tomorrow. That must of hurt... bad!

GP: TRO holding his back, Dark Wolf grapples him... and he delivers a knee into Raging One's gut! That doubles TRO over, and Dark Wolf with a rocker dropper! The cover by Dark Wolf!

Nikki: 1!

JT: 2!

GP: And a kickout by Raging One. Dark Wolf is back over by the turnbuckle, and he takes that chair. Raging One charges... SPEAR!!! HE BLEW DARK WOLF OUT OF HIS SHOES WITH THAT ONE! Raging One picks up the fallen chair, and climbs to the top of the turnbuckle. Dark Wolf isn't getting up this time, and TRO leaps from the top! LEG DROP FROM THE TOP WITH THE CHAIR!!! DARK WOLF'S FACE IS BUSTED OPEN!


GP: TRO with the cover! 1... 2.... thr... and Wolf barely manages to get his arm up.

Nikki: Wolf is in trouble here, JT's prediction just may come true!

GP: The Raging One picks Dark Wolf up to his feet, and whips him into the ropes. Dark Wolf bounces off, and TRO with the pick up for the Gorilla Press Slam! NO! HE ISN'T DROPPING HIM!!! OVER THE TOP ROPE!!! THROUGH A TABLE ON THE OUTSIDE!!! THAT HAS TO BE A NINE FOOT DROP AT LEAST!

JT: Dark Wolf is... well... he's just sitting there.

GP: That's right, Dark Wolf isn't even moving as The Raging One makes his way out of the ring. TRO gets up to Dark Wolf, and tries to pull him up. LOW BLOW!!! Low blow by Dark Wolf, that put TRO to his knees! Dark Wolf with a quick snap suplex with Raging One landing on the shards of the broken table.

Nikki: How are these two inflicting such extreme amounts of pain on each other, and surviving?

GP: I have no idea Nikki, they just do.

JT: I think they be smoking the marijuana. At least, Raging One is for sure.

GP: Dark Wolf brings TRO to his feet, Firemen's Carry.


GP: Yes, a firemen's carry!


GP: Well...


GP: Dark Wolf picking up the guard rail now... and he drops it right on to Raging One's neck! That steel rail has to be pretty heavy!

Nikki: It's supposed to hold the fans back, not to be used as a weapon!

GP: I don't think that matter much to Dark Wolf, as he bring it up once again... right back down on to TRO's neck. Wolf brings The Raging One to his feet, and whips him to a guardrail... another reversal!!! TRO SENDS WOLF FLYING INTO THAT GUARD RAIL! DARK WOLF CAN'T STOP, HE GOES RIGHT INTO THE CROWD!

JT: Hope no fans got hurt... Jamie needs as much money as he can get.

GP: Well, if it's coming out of any one's paycheck, it will be yours!


GP: Nothing, nevermind. TRO has a chair in his hands now, and he slams it right into Wolf's face! That sends Wolf backpedaling down the entrance way. Raging One with another wicked chair shot to the face of Dark Wolf that sends Wolf behind the curtain. Raging One follows!

GP: They are both out into a hallway just outside the main arena, and Raging One is apparently choking out Dark Wolf with some cable wires. Wolf is gasping for breath as Raging One pulls up on those black wires! Wolf's face is totally blue, and TRO could possibly end it right here. The ref lifts Wolf's hand once... down, he lifts it twice... down, he lifts it thrice.... dow... NO! HE MANAGES TO KEEP IT UP, BARELY!!! Dark Wolf flips TRO over his head! What would you call that move exactly?

Nikki: A cable mare?

GP: Sounds good to me! Dark Wolf flips The Raging One over his head with a cable mare, and collapses to the ground. He has to regain all that oxygen he just lost at the hands of TRO!

JT: Yeah, Raging One had that cable on pretty tight.

GP: Raging One picks Wolf back up to his feet, and nails him with a chop. That is enough to wake Wolf up out of his stupor, and they are brawling now. Rights and lefts, lefts and rights! TRO grabs Wolf's arm, and whips him into the wall! Raging One with a Overhead Belly-to-Belly that launches Wolf through a door! Who's dressing room is that?

Nikki and JT: IT'S ANGEL'S!!!

JT: Woah boy! I hope Max is recording this!


Nikki: Where is Capital?

GP: I HAVE NO IDEA! Raging One with a belly-to-back suplex on the carpeted floor! That hurt both of them!

JT: Tell them to go a little to the left! Some One! What is she wearing?

GP: Can't really tell, the camera isn't in view. WHAT THE?!?

Nikki: Oh... my...



Nikki: Are those pieces of glass?

GP: YES THEY ARE!!! Raging One with the cover!

Nikki: Where the heck is the ref?

JT: There he is!

Nikki: 1!

GP: And the kickout by Dark Wolf. Raging One had it all won right there. Now what is TRO doing? He lays Dark Wolf out with a bulldog! Picks him up on to his back, and is carrying him out.

Nikki: Where is he taking Dark Wolf?


GP: Well, they are out of the arena now! Raging One has Dark Wolf unconscious on his shoulders as he carries him to wherever he is going. Sooo... this is taking a while, what the heck is Raging One doing?

JT: Well, he is crazy, who the heck knows.

Nikki: Maybe he saw something in the area that he thought he could use in his match?

GP: I BELIEVE YOU ARE CORRECT NIKKI! Raging One has crossed a field, and come to a pair of railroad tracks. He lets Wolf off of his shoulders, and wraps him up into a pump handle.... MELTDOWN ON TO THE TRAIN TRACKS!!!

JT: Uh oh!

Nikki: Here comes the eight o' clock, early as usual!

JT: How would you know?

Nikki: Just... seemed like an appropriate thing to say.


JT: Hey, we could submit the tape to that show! You know, the one that shows people die!





Nikki: Oh... my... God...




JT: Is this a first for wrestling?




Nikki: OH MY GOD!!!

GP: PYGMIES' PAINSTICK!!! OFF THE TOP OF THE TRAIN!!! DARK WOLF IS DEAD!!! HE IS F'N DEAD!!! TRO WITH THE COVER, BUT THE REF IS WAY BACK SOMEWHERE! 1...2...3...4...5...6...7, it doesn't matter, there is no ref to count!

JT: There he is!


Nikki: 1!

JT: 2!


Television Title Match
Jason Nash -c- v. Billy Larson

GP- It is now time....

JT- Hold on...I gotta say it. That was a f*cking awesome match, I'm sorry. That was just two guys beating the sh*t out of each other for the hell of it!

GP- I was's time for Jason Nash to put his Television title on the line against 'Mr. Hardcore' Billy Larson!

Nikki- This one is sure to be a memorable fight.

JT- Blah blah blah, yadda yadda yadda.

Ring Announcer- The following matchup is scheduled for 1 fall and has a 30 minute time limit. This match is for the IWO Television Championship, introducing first, the challenger, accompanied by the lovely Summer, Billy Larson!

("Nobody Loves Me" by Limp Bizkit plays and the crowd gives a mixed reaction as Billy Larson walks out, but once Summer walks out they go nuts, Larson gets in the ring and holds his arms high in the air)

Nikki- Oh look, it's the crackwhore.

JT- Oh baby! It's the crackwhore!

Ring Announcer- And now, his opponent, he is the IWO Television Champion! The master of the jackknife powerbomb, accompanied to the ring by Mr. Tallguy, he is Jason Nash!

("Superthug" by Noreaga plays and the crowd boos like Hell as Jason Nash and Mr. Tallguy walk down to the ring. Jason Nash has the IWO TV title around his waist, Nash gets in the ring, the bell rings)

GP- This one is underway! Jason Nash and Billy Larson are in a grapple, by Jason Nash uses his high amount of strength and throws Billy Larson all the way back to the turnbuckle. Billy Larson doesn't stay down for long as he charges at Jason Nash for a big clothesline but Nash ducks under and he grabs a hold of Billy's arm, Jason swings Larson down to the ground by his arm! That has got to hurt! Nash still has a hold of Larson's arm, Nash wraps his leg around Billy's arm and goes to the ground for a great submission hold! Nash is really going to show us here tonight why he is the man called the TV champ. Larson is reaching towards the ropes, he is extremely close but he can't seem to get a grip on it. He's got the ropes! Nash isn't happy about that and he is now laying down stomp after stomp on Billy Larson! Billy Larson is pulling himself to his feet, still being rained on heavily by the immense stomps from Jason Nash. Larson is to his feet and he grabs Jason Nash by the neck. He tries to push Nash back by his neck but Nash is just too strong! Nash has Larson by the neck, CHOKESLAM BY JASON NASH! What a move! Jason Nash is going to go down for the cover,! Kick out by Larson! This match is totally under Jason Nash's control! Nash grabs Larson and has him in position for a jackknife powerbomb! Nash holds his arms high in the air, but wait! Billy Larson uses all his strength and he lifts Jason Nash over himself with a giant back body drop! What a move by Billy Larson!

Nikki- Jason Nash is going to look back at that replay and smack himself in the face.

JT- I might look at the replay of Summer walking to the ring and smack myself somewhere else.

Nikki- Repulsive, JT, your absolutely repulsive.

JT- And you know you like it.

GP- Billy Larson is taking advantage of the fallen Jason Nash as he is stomping on him like a mad man. Larson runs to the top rope and jumps off, MOONSAULT! He just ran like Hell and propelled himself off of that top turnbuckle! Jason Nash is really feeling some hurt now! Billy Larson pulls Jason Nash to his feet and he delivers a knife edged chop on Jason Nash! And another! And another! You can hear the slaps louder than the crowd! Ouch! And another one! Larson throws Nash to the ropes and he goes for a backbody drop but wait! Nash catches Larson and has him set up for yet another jackknife powerbomb! He lifts Billy Larson up! BOOM! HE CONNECTS! HE CONNECTS! LARSON IS OUT OF THIS THING! HE CAN'T GET UP FROM THAT! NASH COVERS 1..2..WAIT SUMMER IS IN THE RING AND SHE JUST KNOCKED THE REF OUT COLD WITH SOME BRASS KNUCKLES! NASH HAD THE MATCH WON! Summer is now back outside of the ring, MR. TALLGUY HAS SUMMER! TALLGUY GIVES SUMMER A BIG NASTY KISS AND DELIVERS A BODYSLAM! SUMMER HAS BEEN BODYSLAMMED BY MR. TALLGUY! Tallguy has gotten a little bit of compensation for maybe Summer just costing Nash the TV title!


(GP and JT look at Nikki weird)

JT- Why Tallguy why? You are friends with my good buddy Inferno and then you have to go attack Summer! This is a sad sad day for me.

GP- The ref has woken up and Nash is laughing at Summer out there, Billy Larson comes from behind Jason Nash and rolls him up for a pin,! Kick out by Nash! Nash grabs Larson and starts to deliver knee after knee into Billy Larson's chest. Nash let's go and Larson falls over on his side and Nash starts stomping on him again. Nash pulls Larson to his feet and lifts him high above his head and delivers a monster gorilla press! Nash goes all the way to the top now! Nash rarely goes to the top and when he does, he uses a lot of power! Nash is up there, he jumps, BIG SPLASH ON BILLY LARSON! What a move! Nash is still in control of this match, Larson's chances are getting slimmer and slimmer as the night roars on. Nash pulls Larson over his shoulder and runs a few feet and jumps and slams him into the ground! WHAT A RUNNING POWERSLAM! AN EXTRAORDINARY MANUEVER! Larson is totally out cold here! Nash covers,! Larson somehow manages to kick out! Larson may not have much of a chance of beating Nash, but he is lasting as long as he can! Summer is up and walking now! She doesn't even seem to notice Mr. Tallguy even though he body slammed her, I think Summer has something else evil up her sleeve.

Nikki- And she probably has something else up her skirt, stupid slut.

JT- I wish that was me.

GP- Jason Nash pulls Larson to his feet again, he throws Larson to his feet and once Larson returns Jason Nash catches him by his neck and he lifts him high in the air calling for the chokeslam! BOOM! HE CONNECTS! Nash is now calling for the jackknife powerbomb! Nash has Billy Larson set up for it! He has him in the air, but Summer is on the apron! She is starting to remove her top! Oh my! Nash drops Larson down to the ground and he walks over to Summer. Summer is letting Nash touch her! Jesus Christ! Can we show this on TV.

JT- This is PPV GP! We can show anything!

GP- Billy Larson is on his feet now, he never got powerbombed thanks to Summer, he yells at Nash and Nash turns around and Larson kicks him in the gut and he gives Nash a DDT! Once they hit Larson still holds onto Nash tightly down on the ground in the ddt position, it's the Armageddon! (Holding DDT submission) Nash isn't going to be able to get out of this one! Nash is trying to get to the ropes, he's a fairly tall guy but he's just not going to be able to make it. Nash has tapped out! NASH HAS TAPPED OUT! NEW TV CHAMP! NEW TV CHAMP! BILLY LARSON IS THE NEW IWO TV CHAMPION THANKS TO SUMMER!

Intercontinental Tag Team Title Match
Era of our Kind -c- v. Saturday Night Specials

GP- I can't believe that! Billy Larson has earned himself a serious victory tonight!

Nikki- Summer gave him a helping hand....

JT- It doesn't matter, he's the winner, give him the belt, onward we go!

GP- Now we are going to see a great tag team match, where former IWO tag team champs will fight some fairly new guys in the Saturday Night Specials, let's get this one underway.

JT- This match will be in the bag for Era of our Kind.

Nikki- Agreed.

("Enter Sandman" by MetallicA plays and Phantom and Master Mage walk out both carrying chainsaws, they look really freaky)


Nikki- Oh my God, I don't want to know what's going to happen here.


(Era of Our Kind are in the ring and they start up the chainsaws, Saturday Night Specials music plays and they run down to the ring, one of the SNS guys slides in the ring and Phantom slices his head right off with the chainsaw)


JT- Can I get some popcorn?

GP- The last SNS guy is going to try and make a run for it but Master Mage is out of the ring and he slices the guy in half! OH MY GOD! Era of our Kind have savagely and brutally murdered SNS!

JT- Wait! Here comes the Brujah! Another pretty new tag team, they have baseball bats! One of the Brujah swings his bat at Phantom but Phantom cuts the bat in hat and he cuts the guy's leg off then he sticks the chainsaw into his gut! Master Mage cuts the other Brujah member's arm off, the one holding the bat and he shoves the chainsaw into the guy's face!

Nikki (crying)- This is disgusting. Oh my God.

GP- Era of our Kind have murdered Saturday Night Specials and the Brujah, we'll get this mess cleaned up folks and get to our next matchup.

IWO Extreme Title Match
Mad Max -c- vs. Capital Punishment w/ Angel

GP - This should be interesting, this feud has been building up for the past month. They have done just about everything up to this point. There is no telling what will go on in this match.

JT - I just want to sit back and watch the mayhem. I can't wait to see all the blood and guts these two spill out into the ring. Oh wait, this is an extreme match, it can go anywhere, so we could be seeing blood and guts all over the place.

Nikki - There is one key factor to this match that I think could change the way this thing goes down. That factor is Angel being out here with Capital Punishment. You know how Angel hates Mad Max. It could end up being two on one before this match is over.

GP - I personally don't think they should let Angel out here, but that's just me and what I say usually doesn't matter around here. She could make this match end quick, I have this strange feeling about this thing. I think Mad Max has been set up.

JT - You really think Angel is going to make that big of a difference in this match? You have to be crazy. Mad Max may be obessed with her but I don't think he will give up his Extreme Title for a woman. Hey, speaking of that, he doesn't even have his Extreme Title, which he calls Bob. Angel stole that from him didn't she!?! First she takes Mad Max's belt then she breaks my camera earlier tonight. I think that girl needs to be taught a lesson.

Nikki - Mad Max isn't going to do anything to Angel. We've said that too many times. He is in love with her, he doesn't care that she took his belt, all he cares about is that he is in a match with who he thinks is Angel's man, Capital Punishment, and he feels that if he beats him that Angel will run to him. So, in other words, Mad Max is going to try and destroy Capital Punishment. I really do feel sorry for him.

GP - I think we've talked too much, you know what it is time for!?!


GP - NO!!! It is time to head up to our ring announcer and let him bring in those two guys that want to beat the living crap out of each other.

Nikki - Oh, wonderful!!!

GP - Take it away ring announcer man!!!

(The Ring Announcer is getting into the ring. Guess what he has in his hand!?! Just guess!!! No!!! We are going to play this game right, just f'n guess!!! WRONG!!! He has in his hand what could change the face of the IWO as we know it. He has his sexy piece of meat you know and love as a microphone!!! The crowd is starting to chant "Mad Max")

Ring Announcer - This contest is going to be a WAR. It is for the IWO Extreme Title!!! It features two men that have hatred coming out there butts for each other. They have been feuding for nearly a month setting up this classic match here at Desperate Measures. One would say this match isn't for a belt, but for a woman... And Now...

("Americana" by Offspring begins to play. The crowd gets up.)

Ring Announcer - Introducing first... he is the current number one contender for the Extreme Title. He currently holds the belt, even though he isn't champion. It was stolen from the champion a few weeks back by a certain Angel. Tonight, he can actually become the champion and say that the belt is actually his... He weighs in at 321 pounds... He stands at 6'11".. He is a former North American Champion... He is the master of The Death Penalty... Here is Capital Punishment!!!

(Capital Punishment comes walking out. Angel is right behind him. Half the crowd is cheering for Angel, the rest are booing Capital Punishment. He is carrying The Extreme Title over his shoulder.)

JT - There's the bitch that broke my camera. I think I should go over to her and give her a slap as pay backs.

GP - I do believe that Capital Punishment would probably ring your neck.

JT - So you are saying that I shouldn't do that!?!

GP - Exactly!!!

(Capital Punishment and Angel are in the ring. They are waiting for Mad Max to make his way out.)

Nikki - I think Capital Punishment is ready for this match. He looks really focused and with Angel by his side, I think he has this match in the bag.

JT - Don't be so sure, Angel is evil and could screw up at anytime, like she did earlier when she broke my precious camera.

GP - Oh yeah, one of those little fun time cameras that cost 5 dollars the local Wal-Mart. I'm sure that really hurt you.


("The Frayed Ends of Sanity" by Metallica begins to play. The fans begin to cheer.)

Ring Announcer - And now we bring out the Champion... He is looking for his belt and looking for his dream. Will he get both??? He has been called the most psychotic man in IWO history with his fairy tales and poems... He is being led to the ring by Bat, his trusty sidekick.. He weighs in at 298 pounds and stands 6'9".. He is a member of the FWA... Here is MAD MAX!!!

(Mad Max makes his way out. He is holding "Bat". The crowd is cheering him on. He slowly walks to the ring.)

JT - There is the psycho. That's the only reason I think he will win, just because he is a damn psycho. He has that bat with him and he is coming out here to get Bob and Angel. Is that not just insane!?!

GP - That's what makes him tick. He does this because the fans like it. He does this to scare people. It is his way and if he wins this way, why not be a psycho!?!

Nikki - Maybe if he were less of a psycho, Angel would actually give him the time of day. I think that could be all of his troubles, that's from a woman's point of view of course.

(Mad Max climbs up the ring steps. Capital Punishment runs over and starts swinging the Extreme belt. The ref tries to pull Capital Punishment back. Punishment backs off. Mad Max gets into the ring with "Bat". He charges after Capital Punishment. Capital Punishment and Angel slide out of the ring. The ref is now yelling at Mad Max. The crowd is cheering.)

GP - I don't think Angel and Capital Punishment want to get involved with Mr. Bat. That just doesn't sound good. Flesh against bat, wonder which would win!!!

JT - Depends on whose flesh it is Greg.

Nikki - Oh, sometimes you just say the stupidest things!!!

JT - I love you too Nikki!!!


(Mad Max is standing in the center of the ring motioning for Capital Punishment to get into the ring. Angel is circling the ring, unoticed by Mad Max. She slides in the ring behind Mad Max. SHE JUMPS ON HIS BACK!!! She is clawing at his face. This gives Capital Punishment a chance. He gets into the ring and takes away bat!!! The ref sees that both men are in the ring and calls for the bell!!)

Ding Ding

Mad Max is trying to get Angel off of his back... Capital Punishment drops down with bat. Bat to the knee!!! Mad Max goes down sending Angel down as well. Angel falls to the mat. Capital Punishment swings "bat" again.. Right to the back of Mad Max!!! Capital Punishment with blow after blow!!! The crowd is booing him. Finally Capital Punishment drops "bat" and picks Mad Max up. He has him up in a fireman's carry... DEATH VALLEY DRIVER!!! He makes a quick cover on Mad Max..1...NO!!! He only gets a one count. Capital Punishment shakes his head. He goes over and helps Angel out of the ring. Mad Max is still down. He looks up and sees "bat". He reaches out and grabs it and hides it under him. Capital Punishment turns back to Mad Max. He reaches down to pick him up... HE GETS "BAT" IN THE HEAD!!! Down goes Capital Punishment!!!

JT - I guess Mad Max was playing possum there. Capital Punishment fell for it, that makes him look stupid. He was too busy helping that bitch out of the ring. I really feel sorry for Capital Punishment. I have to sit by Angel during Hostile Takeover, he has do her at night.

GP - That's nice to know JT. Why do you always bring up things like that???

Nikki - Does the word "nutcase" ring a bell Greg???

JT - HEY!! I'm not gay!!!

(Greg and Nikki shake their head.)

Mad Max gets up and jerks Capital Punishment up. He throws him over the top rope right at the feet of Angel. Mad Max follows him out. He pulls Capital Punishment up. He picks him up.. He drops him face first onto the ringsteps!!! Angel is screaming out. Mad Max turns around and grabs Angel... A KISS!!! HE PLANTS A KISS ON HER!!! Angel pushes him away and starts slapping at him. Mad Max grabs her by the hair!!!


Mad Max shoves her face down toward his crotch!!! LOW BLOW BY ANGEL!!! Mad Max down to his knees. Angel starts clawing at his eyes!!! Mad Max screams out!!! KICK TO CROTCH!!! ANOTHER!!! Mad Max falls face first to the floor!! Angel starts stomping on him now!!! The crowd is booing Angel.

GP - Look at her beat away on Mad Max!!! This is unreal. I knew she would be a factor but she has literally swing the momentum of this match around.

Nikki - I told you guys!!! Never mess with a woman!!!

Angel walks over and grabs a chair. She heads back over and wacks Mad Max in the back with it!!! And AGAIN!!! The ref is out and is trying to pull Angel off of Mad Max... HE GETS HIT WITH THE CHAIR!!! The ref goes down. The crowd now cheers Angel. She goes over and starts stomping on the ref. She has lost it!!! Capital Punishment is getting up slowly. He looks around and sees both Mad Max and the ref down. He goes over and grabs Angel and starts yelling at her pointing to Mad Max. Angel is yelling back!!!

JT - Uh-Oh, all is not good in lover's lane tonight. Doesn't look like the little Cappy will be venturing in to Angel Land tonight.

GP - JT!!! Don't say things like that.

JT - Oh come on Greggy. Let the people hear what they want to hear!!! You know they love me and I can say just about anything and it makes them smile!!!

Nikki - whatever you say JT.

Capital Punishment is trying to tell Angel to go to the back. She is refusing to do so. She grabs the chair she hit the ref and Mad Max with and sets the chair up. She sits down in the chair and refuses to move. Capital Punishment picks the chair up and starts to carry it and Angel to the back. Mad Max is slowly getting up. He sees Angel is being carried away by Capital Punishment. He gets up and charges after Capital Punishment. He shoves him in the back sending Capital Punishment falling face first to the floor. Angel, in the chair, goes crashing onto the floor. The back of Angel's head hits hard. She isn't moving. Mad Max rushes over to her. He is yelling for help.

GP - That fall didn't look good guys. Angel could be seriously hurt. She fell right on her head. We do need to get some help in here for her.

JT - I want my money for my camera so she better be ok!!!

Nikki - awwww... are you really concerned for her JT? I never knew you cared about Angel that much!!!


Mad Max is standing over Angel. Capital Punishment is up. He charges at Mad Max sending him down to the floor. He gets on top of Mad Max and starts punching away on him. Mad Max rolls him over and gets on top of him and starts throwing punches. Capital Punishment throws Mad Max off. He gets up and looks around for some kind of weapon. He finds a spare table just sitting there. He goes over and picks the table up and throws it at Mad Max. Mad Max moves out of the way sending the table over the guardrail and into the fans. The fans scatter but two of them get hit with the table!!! Capital Punishment seems to be laughing. Mad Max has gone over to the back part of the arena. He has found some kind of black box with wires attached to it. Capital Punishment comes over.. Mad Max throws the box at Capital Punishment. Capital side steps the box and it goes crashing to the floor. A huge flame shoots from it and a fire has started.

GP - Oh this is wonderful. A damn fire has started in the arena. This is all we need. I bet they never invite us back here. I mean just because we burn the damn ARENA DOWN!!!

JT - Calm down, we aren't in any kind of danger yet. I just wonder what that box was for?

The flames are starting to get higher in the arena. Many of the fans have moved back. Mad Max grabs Capital Punishment and slings him into a pile of wires. He starts wrapping the wires around the neck of Capital Punishment!!! He is choking him to death!!! Just then sirens are heard.

Nikki - Well, here comes the firemen!!!

GP - This is just great...

The back part of the arena luckily is big enough so that a firetruck can come in. The big doors open up right next to where Mad Max and Capital Punishment are brawling. The firetruck comes into the arena. Some of the fans cheer for it. The firemen immediately grab the hose and go over to the fire. Mad Max stops choking Capital Punishment and jerks him up. He slings him face first into the side of the firetruck!!! Capital Punishment stumbles back to Mad Max... DDT TO THE FLOOR!!! Capital Punishment is out... He rolls Capital Punishment over.. He makes a cover. The ref is down..1..2..NO!! Capital Punishment manages to get his shoulder up!!!

GP - He was just rammed into the damn firetruck and given a ddt to the floor. How can he kick out of that!?!

JT - He is insane.. Hell, both of these guys are insane.

The firemen are trying to put out the fire. Paramedics are still working on Angel. It doesn't look good for her. Mad Max goes over and find a ladder. He sets the ladder up right next to the fire truck. He goes over and jerks Capital Punishment up. He starts carrying him up the ladder!! They are going to the top of the firetruck!!! They are to the top!!! Mad Max is setting up Capital Punishment up for the Mania from the firetruck!!! The crowd is cheering Mad Max on... NO!!! Capital Punishment JUST FLIPPED MAD MAX OVER!!! HE FALLS FROM THE TOP OF THE FIRETRUCK!!! Mad Max lays motionless on the floor below!!! Capital Punishment is getting up. He looks down and sees Mad Max... He grabs a damn fire extinguisher... HE JUMPS FROM THE TOP OF THE F'N TRUCK! HE LANDS RIGHT ON MAD MAX WITH THE F'N FIRE EXTINGUISHER!!! BOTH MEN ARE OUT COLD!!! The ref doesn't know what to do!!!

JT - This is crazy. All Capital Punishment had to do was climb down that damn ladder and pin Mad Max, but he wanted to show off and he jumped from the top of the damn fire truck!!! He could be the Extreme Champion now he is hurt along with Mad Max.

GP - I agree with you JT. Capital Punishment might have just cost himself the match.

Nikki - Well, neither man is moving. I don't think this match can possibly go on. If it does these men should be given some kind of title for being the stupid guys alive.

Neither man is moving. The ref is starting a ten count. WAIT A MINUTE!!! Angel is getting up!!! She just shoved away one of the paramedics. She is going over to where Capital Punishment and Mad Max are laying. She gets down on the floor and starts choking on Capital Punishment!!! The crowd is cheering her on!!! She is putting her finger nails right into Capital Punishment's neck!!!

JT - Looks like somebody is mad after getting hurt... HAHA!!!

GP - After seeing this JT, you should watch what you say around her.

She looks over at Mad Max. She stops choking Capital Punishment. She starts choking Mad Max!!! The crowd is now booing Angel!!! She jerks Mad Max up and puts him up against the fire truck!!! She does the same to Capital Punishment!!! She looks at them both!! SHE KICKS CAPITAL PUNISHMENT IN THE CROTCH!!! HE FALLS TO THE FLOOR... SHE KICKS MAD MAX IN THE CROTCH!!! HE FALLS ON TOP OF CAPITAL PUNISHMENT!!! The ref counts...1...2...3!!!

Winner and STILL Extreme Champion - Mad Max

JT - Angel just screwed this match up!!! That's so damn stupid!!! She is headed for the ring. Now what the hell is she going to do!?!

(Angel goes over and gets a microphone. She gets into the ring.)

Angel - I've had enough of both of you morons!!! All you want to do is break each other in half. Well, it is over!!! Capital Punishment, you aren't my CAPPY anymore!!! I want your things out of my house TONIGHT!!! Mad Max, you sick fu*k. I never liked you and I never will. You two belong together. Go screw yourselves or something. I'm sticking with Hostile Takeover!!! And to all my fans. I'm sorry, but my days as a manager and wrestler are over.. It's been great!!! THANKS!!!

(Angel waves to the crowd and heads out of the ring. The fireman have put the fire out and are leaving. Angel walks over by Mad Max and Capital Punishment. She looks down at them and shakes her head and walks to the back.)

GP - This is amazing. She has just dumped Capital Punishment and cost him the Extreme Title. And guess what JT. She is going to be by yourside at Hostile Takeover, EVERY WEEK NOW!!!


Nikki - You know you love her!!!

(Capital Punishment and Mad Max start to move. Capital Punishment is up first. He looks down at Mad Max. He HELPS HIM UP!?! They start talking!!!)

GP - What is this!?!

(Mad Max and Capital Punishment SHAKE HANDS!!! They are now walking to the ring. The crowd is cheering them on!!! They get into the ring, Mad Max has a microphone.)

Mad Max (facing Capital Punishment) - Angel just cost you the damn Extreme Title and dumped your ass!!! What are you going to do now!?!

(Mad Max hands Capital Punishment the microphone.)

Capital Punishment - I'm going to DISNEY LAND!!! And then I'm gonna team up with you and kick some ASS!!!

(The crowd cheers as the two guys shake hands again. They head out of the ring.)

JT - That's unbelievable. They hated each other for so long and now they are going to be partners!?!

Nikki - Don't you just love how things work here in this crazy place we call the IWO...

GP - Well, I guess the Extreme Title Match is over. Lets move on!!!

JT - Oh boy, what's next? Are we going to see Kenneth Star and Bill Clinton hug each other and become the next Sigfreid and Roy!?!

Nikki - HAHA!!!

GP - Lets MOVE on!!!

Hostile Youth -c- v. Psychotic Mother F*ckers

GP-Well if you want action we're providing it here tonight. Now we come to the IWO Tag team title match between The Hostile Youth and the Psychotic Mother (Bleep)

Nikki-Hostile Youth continues to shine for this federation as the tag team champs. They've got it all, youth, speed, agility, and best of all they're hunks.

JT-That's Nikki for you. Always thinking with her (bleep). Hostile Youth does have youth on their side, they may be faster and more agile but that won't matter for squat when the most sadisitic, pathological, and down right evil tag team in wrestling is their opponents. They will turn the Hostile Youth and turn them into Sheepish Old Men.

GP-Lets go down to the ring announcer.

Ring Announcer: Ladies and Gentleman, this next match at Desperate Measures is a tag team match for the IWO Tag Team titles. Introducing first the challengers ("Im An Asshole" by Dennis Leary plays as the crowd boo's) From Parts Unknown, Weight Unknown here is Justin Shack and The Mother F*cker. They are The Psychotic Mother F*uckers!!!!!!!!!

GP- The PSF is in the house and hit the ring. Justin Shack, TMF, ready to take those titles but in their way stands an excellent Hostile Youth.

Ring Announcer: And their opponents are the current IWO Tag team champions. Being accompanied to the ring by Harlequin, here is Ashton Cain, "Phoenix" Phelan Kell. The Hostile Youth!!!!!

GP- The crowd is on their feet here tonight for the Hostile Youth. Cain and Kell, high fiving their way to the ring.

Nikki-Now I don't expect JT to ever agree with me but as good as The Hostile Youth is right now I think they haven't yet reached their peak abilities. In a few years if they stay together they could be talked about in the same breath as The Legion of Doom, Arn Anderson/Tully Blanchard, The Steiner Brothers, and Harlem Heat. They are that good.

JT-But that is a few years from now and only if they get past the PMF. It won't happen tonight and a few years from now they'll just be a memory.

GP-Referee Craig Price calls for the bell and we're underway here. Both teams talking to their partners in the corner deciding who will go first. It looks like Ashton Cain is going to start for the Hostile youth and Justin Shack for the PMF. They get to the center of the ring and a nice hip toss by Cain. Justin complaining of a pull of the trunks on the hiptoss but referee Craig Price didn't see it and tells Shack so. That is one thing I like about Price. If a wrestler complains about something and he doesn't see it he doesn't go over to the other guy and ask if he did it because even if he did he wouldn't admit it. They circle again and another collar and elbow hookup. Now Shack hiptosses Cain. Cain just raises his eyebrows as if he's saying 'not bad' then picks himself up. Right now they are just trying to feel each other out. They circle once again but as Shack tries for another collar and elbow hookup Cain goes low with a knee to the midsection. Shack is a little stunned after that move, and Cain tries to take some offensive, throwing Shack into the ropes, and executing a drop toe hold on his way back. Shack now on the floor, and Cain is pounding the knee of Shack, who is howling in pain! The force that Shack is putting into those blows!

Nikki-So far the Hostile Youth is out Psychoticing the PMF!

GP- He lets up for a breif second, before pulling Shack to his feet. He sends him into the ropes again, and hits him with a back body drop. But Shack lands on his feet! And gives Cain a neckbreaker, suprising the hell out of Cain and hurting him bad.

JT - Of course he's hurt bad. You ever hear of somebody being hurt good?

GP - Shack with the upper advantage for now, as he grinds his boot into the throat of Cain. Referee Craig Price is telling Shack to break the hold, as he tags in TMF the powerhouse of this team. TMF takes off into the ropes, Shack releases the hold, and TMF plants his leg right on the neck of Cain! Great teamwork there by the team of the PMF. TMF not allowing Cain to get up, as he applies a rear chinlock to one half of the tag champions. Cain is still a bit affected by the neckbreaker earlier, but he's trying to fight it off. He's managed to get back to his feet, he drives an elbow in the solar plexus of TMF, another elbow breaks the hold and now executes a belly-to-back suplex. That stopped TMF in his tracks. Cain trying to stumble over to his corner...

Nikki-And he needs to tag so he can clear the cobwebs out. He's still a little groggy

JT-and the PMF has to stop him from making the tag. He's hurting right now.

GP - Cain is almost there, TMF back up and runs over to Cain and lands a double axe handle to the back , but all that did was knock him forward into Kell! The tag was made and here comes Phelan Kell, and he's wailing into TMF! Lefts, rights, and everything else he's got! Shack in the ring now, to help his partner, but Phelen is not backing down. He just threw Shack over the top rope!

JT- The referee is starting to lose control of this matchup. This is PMF's best chance to take the title while there is all this commotion.

GP - Cain goes out after Shack. He picks him up and rams him back first into the ring post. Cain jerks him up and rolls him back in the ring and follows him in. All 4 men are in the ring. Shack and Cain are thrown into the ropes. A Quadruple clothesline. Shack and Cain double clotheslined each other while TMF and Kell duplicated it. All four men are lying still in the ring

Nikki- Who are legal at this point?

GP- Craig Price looks down at his hand where he keeps a little device which tells him who is legal. Craig Price grabs Justin Shack and drags him over to his corner. Now he's going the same to Ashton Cain. So I'm assuming here that Kell and TMF are the legal men in the ring

Nikki-Craig Price has always been more of a hands on referee than most officials. He wanted to make sure it's one on one in the ring even if it is a tag match.

GP- The ref is starting a ten-count now. He's up to six and so far and only now are both men starting to find their feet. It took them both to the count of eight, and they're both up! But, they're totally out of energy, and they slump into the ropes, right next to each other. TMF punches Kell in the jaw. But Kell fires back and now they are exchanging blows. Who is going to win this battle? TMF kicks Kell in the gut and then follows up with a DDT. TMF pulls Kell back up and begins to talk some trash to him. TMF hits Kell in the throat and then follows up with a swinging neckbreaker. TMF picks up Kell and plants him with a piledriver. He goes for the cover 1...2... and Cain runs in to make the save. Kell staggers to his feet slowly and TMF takes advantage with a verticle suplex. Kell is dragged to a corner and picked up by TMF like he was a baby. Kell is at the top turnbuckle and TMF grabs him AND A PILEDRIVER FROM THE 2ND TURNBUCKLE. IT LOOKED LIKE HE WAS GOING FOR SOME SORE OF POWERBOMB BUT INSTEAD TMF PUT KELL BETWEEN HIS LEGS AND PILEDROVE HIM TO THE MAT!!! THAT HAS TO BE IT AS WE GET 1...2...TH-AND CAIN AGAIN SAVES HIS PARTNER AND THE BELTS FOR THE MOMENT!!! WHAT A MOVE

JT-That is what I'm talking about with these guys. PMF is originating some moves that we haven't seen before.

GP- TMF picks Kell up and drags him to the corner. He tags in Shack who does a Val Venis style hip gyration to the Hostile Youths manager/valet Harlequin. Now Shack blows a kiss to Harelquin who does appreciate the gesture.

Nikki-Well I don't blame her. Harelquin is no bimbo and doesn't deserve to be treated like one.

JT-Who are you trying to kid Nikki. She's a bigger slut than Monica Blowinski.

GP- Shack just power bombed Kell to the mat but he doesn't go for the cover! That is a big mistake in my book as he is simply watching Kell struggle to crawl over to his partner for a tag. Shack is simply laughing. Kell is almost there. BUT BEFORE HE COULD TAG SHACK GRABS THE LEG AND PULLS HIM BACK TO THE MIDDLE OF THE RING WHERE HE DRIVES AN ELBOW TO THE UPPER THIGH, ALMOST A LOW BLOW!!!!

JT-Shack was simply playing with his mind. He's Psychotic.

GP-Shack is toying with Kell now. Kell keeps trying to crawl to his corner put Shack keeps on pulling him back just as he is about to make the tag and either drops down on the upper thighs or stomps on the midsection. Shack is not going for the cover. Once again Kell is struggling to make it to his corner. He has to tag. He is out of gas. Shack is reaching to pull Kell back in again but Kell kicks him the knee. Shack grabs it in pain. KELL MAKES THE TAG TO CAIN!!!!! Cain rushing in a clothes lines and knocks Shack down. Here comes TMF and he gets clotheslined as well. Here comes Kell limping in to take out TMF! We've got all four men in the ring. Kell and TMF fall outside the ring. Cain and Shack, the legal men are in the ring. TMF just grabbed a chair and waffled Kell goofy with it. Harlequin has gotten up on the ring apron to inform the referee of what just happened on the outside. The ref is distracted and is telling the Hostile Youth's manager/valet to get off the ring apron. In the mean time Shack has Cain in a full nelson. TMF is in the ring with the chair. TMF swings! CAIN DUCKS AND TMF JUST WAFFLED HIS OWN PARTNER!!!!! CAIN WITH A KICK TO TMF'S MIDSECTION, THE CHAIR IS DROPPED! DDT BY CAIN ONTO THE CHAIR KNOCKING TMF OUT. CAIN GOES FOR THE COVER! HARLEQUIN GETS OFF THE RING APRON AND THE REFERRE TURNS AROUND HE COUNTS! WE'VE GOT 1, WE'VE GOT 2, WE'VE GOT 3!!!!!!! THAT'S IT. THE HOSTILE YOUTH RETAINS THE TAG TEAM TITLES

Ring announcer: The winner of this match and still IWO tag team champions The Hostile Youth!!!!!!

GP-The PMF tried to take a short cut but it failed miserably. TMF had taken out "Phoenix" Phelan Kell with the chair and looked to do the same with Cain but but TMF tried to do his impersonation of Mark McGwire he struck out when he hit his partner. Cain took advantage of the shock and DDT'ed TMF and that was all she wrote as Cain got the 1-2-3.

GP-Now things are going to be getting very ugly here in a few moments and I don't mean just because of the facial features of our next two contestants. This match is going to be for the #1 Contendership of the federation and it will be fought under I Quit Rules. In other words the only way to obtain victory is to get your opponent to say I Quit. When you put Zombie and The Vietnam Veteran in the same ring there will be carnage guarenteed.

Nikki-I don't think Veteran even realizes that a victory here will put him in line for a title shot. He just wants to hurt Zombie for the constant assaults Zombie has committed on both him and more importantly his wife Katie.

JT-Veteran has been lucky. The luckiest man alive. Well everybody's luck runs out sooner and later and tonight is the night Zombie kicks that 52 years old toothless, geritol drinking, geriatric, walking freak show into oblivion. Zombie's time is now. Veteran's was in the past. The ancient past. After tonight Zombie will take the world title from whoever wins the Zombie-Morris match tonight.

GP-I have a feeling that the pain threshold for these two men will be much higher than it will be for the people watching them, ourselves included. Zombie has an incredibly high pain threshold. Veteran had half his face ripped away from an explosion at our last Pay Per View. Something has to give here.

Ring Announcer: The following contest is the I Quit match to determine the #1 Contender for the Worlds Heavyweight Title. Introducing first ("Du Hast" by Rammstien begins to play.) He is the leader of the NWF, he is a former IWO World Champion, he stands 6'11" and weighs in at 350 pounds... Here is ZOMBIE!!!

GP-Listen to the boo's. Without question Zombie is the most hated man in the IWO today. Zombie sees a young man with a "Go Veteran" sign and HE GRABS THE SIGN AND RIPS IT TO SHREADS. NOW HE'S WIPING ON HIS BACKSIDE BEFORE THROWING IT BACK AT THE YOUNG MAN

Nikki-How low can this guy go?


JT-Fans should stay on their side of the fence and let Zombie take care of business.

GP-Now Zombie has entered the ring and grabs the microphone from our ring announcer.

Zombie: Feel free to go to the concession stands right now because we're going to be here a while. I know that The Vietnam Vegitable won't quit right away but that's good because that will mean I can continue to hear his screams of agony just as those two idiotic fans screamed when I put them into the Bowling Ball and as far as that sniviling little brat punk kid goes, those won't be the only tears you'll be shedding this evening because I'm going to make you cry as that HA all american hero The Vietnam Veteran say those words I quit! I will show that all this talk about good beating evil is total bull****. Evil will indeed win this night because Good is so brain dead stupid.

GP-And now the fans are showering the ring with anything that isn't nailed down. Beer is being thrown in the ring, there goes a thing of nacho's and cheese.

Zombie: The truth hurts doesn't it. So does facing me. (Talking to the ring announcer) Now baldy bring my sacrificial lamb here to be slaughtered.

Nikki-He's over confident.

JT-That isn't overconfidence that is simply reality.

GP-And I've got some news for the fans. The Vietnam Veteran has a new ring enterance music and wait until you hear it.

Ring Announcer: And his opponent, standing 6 foot 6, 275 pounds, from Surprise Arizona The Vietnam Veteran (The Ultimate Warriors original WWF music starts to play as The Vietnam Veteran sprints to the ring)

GP-Here comes the Veteran storming the ring and look at Zombie bail out. Veteran is chaseing him around the ring. Zombie enters the ring with Veteran in hot pursuit. Veteran enters and Zombie goes out the other side. Veteran standing in the middle of the ring as the original music of The Ultimate Warrior is playing.

Nikki-Unbelieveable. Listen to the fans! I can barely hear myself talk!

GP-After months of negotiations Veteran has obtained permission to use the music from the WWF which he has always wanted to use because in his words, marines are the ultimate warriors. You can see his face covered in that green camaflouge paint. He is ready for war and Zombie may have been taken by surprise. Zombie has never heard such noise before. It must be humbling

JT-Then again maybe not as Zombie hits Veteran from behind with the timekeeprs bell as Grandpa Jones mounted the 2nd turnbuckle to get the fans behind him. Now listen and see how quiet this place got. Veteran fell off the 2nd turnbuckle and again Zombie is hitting him with the bell.

GP-Remember this is an I Quit match. There is no disqualifications here. Plus referee Kevin Pearson has always been known as a ref who lets wrestlers get away with more things than most. Zombie puts the bell down and DDT's Veteran onto it.

JT-Veteran is knocked out!

GP-Wait a second. Veteran just got up and doesn't appear affected by the bell. Zombie is gloating to the crowd and doesn't see Veteran. Zombie turns around and a right hand by Veteran drops Zombie. Another right hand by Veteran, A third and Zombie doesn't know where he is. Zombie being pulled up and Veteran off the ropes SPEAR BY THE VETERAN!!! HE FOLDED ZOMBIE IN HALF!

Veteran: So do you give up!

Zombie: (bleep) you old man!

GP- Zombie rolling over and going into his trunks. He's pulling out something as Veteran pulls him up and Zombie cracks him with some brass knuckles. That staggers Veteran back and a 2nd one knocks him to the mat. Zombie now taking some of the nacho's and cheese that were thrown in and grinding the Veteran's face in it. Now he's grinding Veteran's face into a beer stain. The beer is stinging Veteran's eye a bit as Zombie goes to the outside of the ring and gets a chair. He comes back into the ring and cracks it over Veteran's head. Now Zombie places the leg between the seat and back support of the chair and drops down on it. That could break Veteran's leg

Zombie: So Veteran, what do you say. Are you ready to say I Quit?

Veteran: Not if that's the best you can do (bleep)!

GP-Zombie drives the knee on the chair again and Veteran felt that one. Zombie goes up again but this time Veteran moves the leg and Zombie's knee's hit the canvas. Zombie rolling to the outside of the ring while Veteran sits up and removes the chair. Veteran rolls outside the ring as well. Veteran has Zombie and he throws him into the steel steps. Veteran charges but Zombie moves out of the way and Veteran goes face first into the steel. Zombie grabs Veteran's face and rams it repeatedly into the steel post now and Veteran is busted open.

JT-That is par for the course. Watching Veteran's matches would give Dracula wet dreams from all the blood that he spills.

Nikki- But he keeps getting up and moves forward.

GP- Zombie takes him over to the Japanese announcers table and telling them to clear out. Zombie suplexs Veteran onto the table and it cracks a little bit but doesn't break. Zombie moves to the ring apron. What is he going to do? Zombie flies through the air but Veteran moves out of the way and Zombie crashes through the table. Veteran getting a chair and sets it up near our french announcers team. He pulls Zombie over and now Veteran stands on the chair with his hand on Zombie's throat!!! SAIGON STRANGLE BY VETERAN PUTTING ZOMBIE THROUGH THE FRENCH ANNOUNCERS TABLE. THAT IS WHAT HE NEEDED THE CHAIR FOR. TO COUNTER THE 5 INCH HEIGHT ADVANTAGE ZOMBIE HAD ON HIM!

Veteran: Give it up you sorry piece of (bleep). Admit that you are no match for the corp!

Zombie: HAHAHAHAHA! You should go into comedy with material like that. The corp is full of (bleep) who (bleep) each other in the (bleep)

GP- Wrong thing to say! Veteran pounding away on Zombie. Veteran picks up his opponent and throws him into the steel and now Zombie is bleeding. Both men are bust open now. Zombie is against the steel railing and Veteran clotheslines Zombie and himself over the top of the railing. The fight has made its way into the crowd

Nikki- I'm surprised it took this long for that to happen.

GP- Veteran and Zombie exchanging blows in the crowd. Zombie grabs a fan and throw her at The Veteran. As he catches her Zombie clotheslines them both and now splashes the pair. We need medical assistance for the women. Zombie doesn't care who he's going to hurt in this matchup just so long as he wins.

JT-And Veteran's big weakness is that he cares about these fans. He's taking a beating just to prove what a great guy he is.

Nikki-And Zombie is proving that he can't fight Veteran one on one so as usually a NWF member is using anybody he can to make up for their lack of guts.

GP- Now Zombie grabs Veteran and face plants him into the concrete busting him up even more. They are getting near the stairs and Zombie DDT's him into the stairs. You can hear the sickening thud of Veteran's head on the concrete. Veteran is prone on the ground and now Zombie grabbing one of the small American flags that were passed out today and blowing his nose into it! THAT GOT THE VETERAN'S ATTENTION! VETERAN POPPED UP WHEN HE SAW THAT AND NEARLY DECAPITATED ZOMBIE WITH A CLOTHESLINE! ZOMBIE GETS UP AND VETERAN MISSES WITH ANOTHER CLOTHESLINE!! NOW ZOMBIE RUNNING UP THE STEPS THROUGH THE CROWD AND VETERAN IN HOT PERSUIT. ZOMBIE GOES THROUGH THE CURTAIN AND TURNS AROUND AS VETERAN COMES THROUGH THE CURTAIN HE IS MET BY A FLYING FOREARM TO THE FACE!

Zombie: Listen up you (bleep) Admit that I'm the man! That I own your wrinkled (bleep) by saying I Quit!

Veteran: (Bleep) You! I've had tougher fights at the enlisted mans club in De Nang.

Zombie: Well De Nang this!!!!!

GP-Zombie picks up Veteran and drives him face first into the concrete wall. Zombie now going over to the popcorn concessions and gets the salt. ZOMBIE JUST THREW SALT INTO VETERAN'S FACE. HE CAN'T SEE AND THE SALT HAS GOTTEN INTO HIS WOUNDS!!! VETERAN IS AT ZOMBIE'S MERCY! ZOMBIE PICKS UP VETERAN AND PILEDRIVES HIM INTO THE CONCRETE!!!

Zombie: Say that you quit.

Veteran: All right....YOU QUIT!!!!

GP-Veteran mocking Zombie and he didn't like it. Zombie picks Veteran up and throws him into the popcorn machine. Veteran staggering over to the cola machine and grabs a cup. He throws the liquid into his eyes which while it hurts will allow him to clear his vision. Zombie grabs Veteran from behind but Veteran lifts his leg up and kicks Zombie in the groin. Veteran grabs Zombie and puts him into a bear hug. That is a submission move right there.

Veteran: Quit you! You can't beat me and you know it!


GP-Zombie trying to break free of the hold but before he can Veteran turns the bear hug into a belly to belly suplex. Zombie has had the wind knocked out of him. Veteran takes a few steps back and signalling for Zombie to get up. Zombie does get to his feet but VETERAN HITS ZOMBIE WITH A SPEAR THAT SENDS BOTH MEN CRASHING THROUGH THE WINDOW!!!!!! BOTH MEN ARE NOW ON THE OUTSIDE OF THE ARENA AND THEY ARE STILL GOING AT IT!!!!! Veteran picks up Zombie and suplexes him to the sidewalk.

Veteran: It is time for you to say it! Say that you were wrong to start this war! Say that you surrender. Say its time for you to admit defeat.

Zombie: I say its time for your Depends (TM) to be changed.

GP-These two men refuse to give an inch and the gore factor is so bad that right now Nikki and JT have left the announcers table to throw up! I'll try to call the action the best I can but these two men look like they're being skinned alive right now! Veteran scrapping Zombies face along the sidewalk but now Zombie turns the table and is rubbing off the skin of Veteran the same way. Zombie picks up Veteran and OH MY GOD!!! ZOMBIE JUST THREW VETERAN INTO THE STREET WHERE HE HAS BEEN HIT BY A CAR!!! THE DRIVER TRIED TO STOP IN TIME BUT VETERAN CAUGHT THE CAR FULL FORCE! OH MY GOD (voice sounding strange) oh my........


JT-Right now its Zombie in first place, The Veteran in second, referee Kevin Pearson is third and our camera crew trailing the pack.

Nikki-So JT you finally finished spilling your guts huh?

JT-What? You don't think that match made me ill do you? No way? I just uhhh had to call up and see if my girlfriend was feeling well. She's a little under the weather.

Nikki: JT, no women would be caught dead being your girlfriend.

JT-Are you calling me a liar?

Nikki-I don't have to.

GP-This is Greg Parker back at you micside. Sorry for my unprofessionalism but after Zombie threw Veteran into the car I couldn't stomatch it anymore

JT-And your stomach couldn't stomach it either.

GP-Well our camera is pursuing the participants. I don't think this match is over yet by a long shot. When we have something to show you we will go back to the Zombie-Veteran match

Nikki- How could we have lost the Veteran and Zombie?! It's what people paid for?!

JT- Jeez Nikki, have a cow!

GP: We have to go on, we'll find them yet. Next up, we have the conclusion of the Ken War-Inferno United States Title match. Both men have won one fall so far. The stips have sick, and these may be the sickest yet.

JT- What are the stips?

GP- I was given a note a short while they are.......

No Rope, Electrified Razorwire Cage, Scafold freefall match: there are no ropes, the ring is surrounded by an electrified razorwire cage, and a 60 foot high scaffold is on top of the cage, the cage is 15 feet high itself. So its a 75 feet high in the air. To win you either have to make your opponent lose due to excessive blood loss or throw them off the 60 foot scaffold. There are weaponso n the scaffold and in the ring/cage area. There is a 30 minute time limit so if the time runs out the cage and scaffold explodes and both men win a free trip to the hospital and the match is a draw.

United States Title Match
Ken War -c- v. Inferno

JT- How come GP and Scott always get handed the notes? I want a note handed to me!

Nikki: Shut up JT.....Razorwire? Scaffold? Exploding ring? We may see a death by the end of this.

JT: Not Inferno's. He's going to leave War beaten and bloody.

GP: Good to see that you're staying impartial, JT.

JT: No problem. Let's get to our handy dandy video feed again, I don't want to miss a minute of this.

GP: Both men are making there way out to the cage that has been built outdoors. Both men look both weary and ready. They are entering the cage. Each one is in an opposite corner. They stare at each other. They both come charging to the center. Thesz press by War! Fists to the face of Inferno to start.

JT: Cover up, Inferno, cover up!

Nikki: Inferno is fighting back. Fists to the head of War. Inferno gets to his feet and pulls War up. Suplex by Inferno. Inferno follows it up with a leg drop. Now a knee drop to the head of War. Inferno now waiting on War to get to his feet. Inferno from the corner. Bulldog! He is in control at this point. Inferno is bringing War close to the cage. Overhead belly to belly suplex by Inferno, and War goes into the electrified razorwire!

JT: Yeah!

GP: Ken War may be unconscious. How anyone could- no, he's moving. I'm speechless. The man got electrocuted, and he's still fighting. But Inferno isn't stopping. Knee to the head of War. He drapes War over the middle rope. Here comes Inferno from the opposite side. He brings the leg crashing down on the back and neck of Ken War. War struggles to his feet and lunges at Inferno. Inferno chokes him with both hands and lifts him up. Choke lift into a power bobm by Inferno! Amazing move there. Inferno thinks he has the match in hand, but War is getting to his feet. Inferno looks incensed.

Nikki: Inferno is going into his boot for something. What could this be?

JT: I know, but I'm not telling.

GP: Geez, it's a fork. He's digging it into the forehead of Ken War. War is now gushing blood. Inferno now raking at the wound, trying to open it up further. Now he pulls War to his feet. Belly to back suplex. Inferno to his feet. A kick to the head fo War.

Nikki: But look at the War Machine. It seems like the taste of blood is enraging him. He springs to his feet with a burst of energy. He's biting Inferno in the head!

JT: Not Inferno's face!

Nikki: War just picked up the fork. He has a sick look on his face. What on earth could be going through his head?

GP: War is winding up with the fork. NO! NO! This is just wrong! War has shoved the fork into Inferno's, ah, lower abdomen. This is why the IWO would not sanction a match between these two men. Look at the measures they are going to.

JT: War should be banned from the ring with behavior like that.

GP: Nevertheless, he's in control. He tosses Inferno up and into the cage and Inferno receives the volts. War has him by the hair and he sends him to the opposite side of the cage. Inferno is in next week. War is opening the cage door. He's going to try and bring Inferno up the steps to the scaffold. He's trying to pull Inferno up behind him, but Inferno pulls him back down and War lands headfirst on the steel connecting the turnbuckle and the post. War's head was busted open before, and now the blood from the cut is flowing like a waterfall. Now Inferno rams War's head into the steel a couple of more times for good measure.

JT: Yeah! War's bleeding like a stuck pig!

Nikki: Inferno is now going to try and bring War up to the scaffold. He's dragguing War up behind him, but it's a long way up. Inferno now has pulled a chain out of his tights, and he has wrapped it around his fist. He's laying punch after punch in on War as they go up.

GP: War won't give up, though. Headbutt into the stomach of Inferno. He has him by the neck, and he slams Inferno's head back into the steel ladder leading to the scaffold. He's going for ten or so. Inferno is now bleeding from the front and back of the head. Blood is covering both men. These men may kill themselves in an attmpt to kill the other.

JT: But you have to admit, it's great entertainment.

Nikki: You truly are sick. War has finally got Inferno up to the scaffold. War slams him face first into the scaffold. And yet again. War is going to deliver a piledriver on the scaffold. He has him up, and he connects. Inferno is hurting. War pulls Inferno up. Northern Lights suplex attempt is blocked by Inferno, and he hits War with one of his own. War is the one staggered. Inferno is going to follow with a power bomb. He's getting a running start. Inferno leaps, but War reverses in mid-air. Frankensteiner by War! What impact! Both men are nearly out of it. We have just reached the fifteen minute mark, so you can win by KO.

GP: I don't care how badly these men are hurt, I don't think you'll be able to keep either one of them down for a ten count. Both men are on their feet. Wild punches connect. Kick in the groin by Inferno. DDT! Inferno nails War with a picture perfect DDT. Inferno is waiting for War to get up. Maybe a knee lift coming up. Inferno comes running, but War catches him with a spinebuster! Amazing counter from Ken War, especially at this late stage of the game. JT is looking upset, and I can't blame him, because his best buddy may be on the verge of losing this one.

JT: No, no! It's not going to happen. He's going to come back, you'll see!

Nikki: War still has control. He's setting him up for a DVD, but Inferno slips off his back. But War retaliates with a swift kick to the tender groin of Inferno. Whippersnapper from War! Inferno rolls, and he's off the scaffold. But he landed on the cage!

All: OH MY GOD!!!

GP: Thousands of volts are coursing through Inferno right now. The match apparently isn't over, because Inferno didn't touch the ground. How he could survive now, is anybody's guess. He could never answer a ten count, nor a hundred count. Yet War doesn't appear to be finished yet. He's setting up for a moonsault off the scaffold! He's lining it up. A leap! Good Lord, he's going to kill himself and Inferno, if Inferno isn't dead already!

JT: Inferno moved! He moved! War hit nothing but cage! He's getting shocked now, too!

Nikki: This is utter carnage.

GP: No question. The referee has started to count. 1,2,3....4....5.....6....both men are to their knees. This is amazing. They are still getting electricity, even standing up. War comes at Inferno with a clothesline, but Inferno ducks. Faceslam by Inferno on the cage! Even more electricity!

JT: War's face is getting charred. Better his than Inferno's.

Nikki: Inferno is telling the ref to count. War is at Inferno's feet. Double leg takedown by War. Elbow drop by War.

GP: I have just gotten word that we have under five minutes remaining in the match. War and Inferno are both to their feet, throwing fists. The electricity sems to have no effect on them now. Thier bodies must be numb. Each man winds up with big fists that send the other backwards and nearly off the cage, but both hold on. War comes forward with a flying forearm. Inferno dives with a flying clothesline. Both miss! Both go facefirst into the cage!

Nikki: This has to be it. Both men are struggling to move. They cralw toward each other. More fists. Each now has the other by the hair. Both men go facefirst into the cage. Each man is rubbing his opponents face into the razorwire. Their faces are being grated, blood is dripping into the ring.

GP: Both men have stopped moving. The ref has started to count. 1...... 2.....3......... 4.........5................6...................7....................

JT: Come on Inferno! Get up!

GP: .............. 8 of them might be moving ......................................................................9................................................. they each seem to be trying to fight the pain and get to their feet, but I don't see how it's humanly possible for either man to do so after what they've been through...... 10!

Nikki: We have a draw.

JT: A lousy draw.

GP: Paramedics are moving in to get both of these men to the hospital. They have them on the stretchers, and they are carrying them down the ladder. Oh my! They realized the same thing! The place is about to blow! Everyone is scrambling to get out....


Nikki: OH MY GOD!!

GP: Folks, we lost the feed to that site......we...we don't know what happened to War or Inferno, or anyone else there. Hopefully we'll have an update for you on Hostile Takeover this week.....right now, (I can't believe this), we have to get back to the ring.

GP- Folks, we have re-established contact for the Zombie-Veteran match...They are at a constuctions site about 3 miles away from the arena. Hopefully we'll have an update for War and Inferno soon. Let's get back to this match.

(Live pictures at a constructions site. Both Veteran and Zombie are fighting in a partially completed house.)

GP-There you see them. Veteran is clubbing Zombie with a long (2 foot long) steel rod. Veteran hitting him on the back of the head, along the back. Both men gushing blood by the bucket! Zombie trying to get close to the Veteran but the ex-marine is keeping out of his reach and continuing to club him

JT-That's unfair to Zombie?

Nikki-As opposed to Zombie using a car?

Veteran: Say it! Say it! Say that you quit before I rip your heart out and shove it up your (bleep)!

Zombie: (Bleep) you!

GP- This is crazy! All the punishment they've taken and neither man giving up yet! Veteran now on top of Zombie and taking the bar and trying to choke him out! In the process of choking him out he's delivering head butt after head butt! Zombie grabs some dirt and throws it into Veteran's face. Veteran lets go of the bar and THE BOWLING BALL! THE BOWLING BALL! BOWLING BALL BY ZOMBIE!!!! THIS HAS TO BE IT!!! ZOMBIE HAS THE VETERAN IN TROUBLE AND....WAIT A SECOND NOW ZOMBIE IS SCREAM!!!! WHAT IS GOING ON?!?!? ZOMBIE TAKES THE TWO FINGERS OUT OF VETERAN'S EYE BUT HIS FINGER IS STILL IN VETERAN'S MOUTH!!!

Nikki-Veteran is biting Zombie's thumb. He said he knew at least 2 counters and I guess that's one of them!

JT-It's disgusting

GP- But it working. Veteran lets go of the thumb and look at the bit marks. Veteran wasn't kidding with that bite and now clotheslines Zombie back down to the dirt! Veteran goes for the steel rod again but before he can swing it Zombie with a kick to the gut. Zombie with the steel pole and he cracks it over Veteran's head! And again! And AGAIN!!! Look at the steel rod! It is bending with each blow!

Zombie: Your (bleep) is mine Vet! Give it up!

Veteran: Is that the best you got? I got hit harder by the nuns at the orphanage!

GP-Zombie again cracks Veteran over the head with the steel rod. Veteran is on dream street but isn't going down!

Veteran: Come on Zombie! The whole world is watching! Is that the best you have! Come on! Try and knock me out!

GP- Zombie obliguing Veteran! Another blow to the head! The blood from Veteran's head is gushing out!

Veteran: Harder Zombie! Right here! (pointing to his face) Right in the face! Right between the eyes!

GP-Zombie getting frustrated! Now he takes the steel rod and jams it into Veteran's rib which bends him over! Now Zombie cracks the back of Veteran's head and back and he finally goes down!

Zombie: Have you had enough yet? Are you ready to quit?

Veteran: (several deep breaths) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

GP-Zombie tries to stab Veteran with the steel pole and he moves out of the way! Veteran throws some dirt into Zombie's face. Zombie swings the pole again but misses. PURPLE HEART BY THE VETERAN!!!! PURPLE HEART BY THE VETERAN!!!!


GP- Veteran has the hold locked in. Zombie is thrashing around and screaming in pain and Veteran not letting go of the hold. Veteran is going to win! Veteran is going to

(A steel beam comes out of nowhere cracking Veteran over the back of the head)

GP- WHAT THE ?!?!?!?! Ken War!!!! Where the hell did he come from? I thought he blew up?!!? Ken War and Zombie stomping away on the Veteran!!! Zombie picks up Veteran and Ken War performs a clotheline!!!! Ken War points to something and Zombie is going there.

Ken War: SUCKER!!!!!! You really thought Zombie was running away from YOU????? We just wanted to get you out of the way so Zombie and I can get back to the arena and get our real objective. Now we're going to back to the arena to finish what we started Wed. to show your little wifey what a real man is like. Especially in BED!!!!!

GP- Ken War running for his life as Veteran is getting to his feet! Ken War is running to a car and dives in. The car is pulling away before the door is even closed and Veteran is running after him!

JT-What a brilliant game plan. Zombie will not only defeat Veteran tonight but get some extra scoring done as well!

Nikki-This is sick!!!!!

GP-Well keep you abreast of the whole situation.

North American Title Match
Jack in the Box -c- v. Chris Anthony

JT- Oh, great. We have to see Jack In The Box fight CA? That little punk Jamie... what does he have against the NWF? I hate that-

GP- I think it's gonna be a hell of a match, JT.

Nikki- I agree with Greg.

JT- You two should just shut the hell up and RESPECT the most elite group of men in the IWO!

GP- Let's just start the match, shall we?

*Bell rings*

JT- WOW! This match is better then I thought it would be!

GP- JT, they're not even hitting each other.

JT- GREAT SHOT TO THE FACE BY CA! HE'S HELPING UP JinB! What a show of sportsmanship, don't you think?

*Nikki slaps JT*

JT- Ow! That hurt!

Nikki- Shut up!

JT- I think we need to get security over here.

GP- While they're arguing, I'm gonna keep on announcing this dud we have in the ring. CA punches JinB, JinB punches CA.


GP- Yippie. He's swinging it around. I think he's trying to hit his invisible friend or something.

Nikki- What the...

GP- NOW there's some action! Jack In The Box just hit CA in the head with the chair!


GP- CA is getting up now. He's pissed.

Nikki- And his head hurts.


JT- Damn it... Jamie, all your doing is taking away your main source of buisness... the NWF.

GP- LOW BLOW BY CA! Both men are stunned! CA bounces off the ropes...

Nikki- Clothesline!

GP- Wow! Pin attempt by CA! 1... kickout by Jack. He should've known not to pin him this early. Pickup... Vertical Suplex by CA. Chris grabs the chair!



Nikki- Jack In The Box is screaming for mercy, but CA isn't giving him any! He drags him out of the ring!


Nikki- Chris Anthony's neck has to be broken by now.


GP- JITB has just given Chris Anthony two piledrivers onto the concrete floor, ladies and gentlemen. Jack is dragging CA into the ring now. OUCH! He smashed CA's head into the ringpost! Pin attempt... 1-2- kickout by CA. Boy, it took him a lot of balls to kick out of that one.

Nikki- Jack seems tired too. He's showboating to the fans!

GP- CA is getting up! He's giving the signal! CA'S WILD RIDE ON JACK IN THE BOX!!!!

Nikki- ONE!!! TWO!!!!


Nikki- CA is frustrated.

JT- So am I, you slut.

*Nikki slaps JT again*

JT- Damn it woman, just do your job!

GP (Ignoring Nikki and JT)- CA goes up to the top rope. Moonsault! Legdrop! Pin! Kickout at two by Jack in the box. What the... A car is driving down to ringside! Luscious is driving it! CA goes down the ramp, and Luscious pops the trunk open. CHRIS ANTHONY PULLS OUT A BARBED WIRE BASEBALL BAT!

JT- Uh-oh.

GP- JinB is coming down to ringside. He's almost had enough. It seems he still has some fight left in him, but he doesn't see the baseball bat CA is hiding behind his back!

Nikki- It looks like CA is extending his hand in friendship to Jack.

GP- Jack is shaking his hand! The two go back in the ring together! CA raises the hand of JitB! NO! JACK IN THE BOX JUST DDT'D CHRIS ANTHONY!

Nikki- CA dropped the bat!

GP- JinB picked it up! HE SMASHES IT OVER THE BACK OF CA! Anthony goes down! Pin! 1---2--- NO!!! JitB is going into the car full of weapons! Luscious doesn't see him! He pulls out a table! And another! And another! AND ANOTHER!!!! JinB pulled out 4 tables!!

Nikki- He's dragging them down to the ring! Luscious sees JinB! SHE STARTS THE CAR UP!

GP- I don't like this. Oh my god... she's trying to hit JITB with it! Jack jumps onto the car!


Nikki- He's next to Luscious! CA is getting up!! He walks toward the car...



GP- CA is pissed off now, but Jack In The Box is charging at him with the car!

Nikki- CA just jumped in the ring!!


JT- Damn, that was a nice Mustang too...

GP- CA breaks the window!! He's taking free shots at Jack In The Box! STOP THE MATCH! THE POOR GUY CAN'T MOVE!!

Nikki- Wait a minute... the Airbag is deflating! JinB is free!



GP- But the referee doesn't see it! The match goes on! Chris is backing away now that JinB is free from the car.

Nikki- Luscious is screaming in pain! She might've broken a bone or something!

GP- Chris Anthony has to decide between Luscious or the North American Title!



GP & Nikki- THREE!!!!!

JT- Holy s***. A VCR and two Jacks have just split a line down the middle of the NWF... what will Zombie and War have to say about this? WHAT ABOUT MY BOY INFERNO?

GP- Jack In The Box retains his North American Title!!

Mystery Death Match
Winner is the number one contender for any title except World Title!!!
Satan vs. ?¿?

GP - This match is going to be a huge one. At the last pay per view, Broken Hearts, Broken Bones, The Mysterious One took a shocking defeat at the hands of The Vietnam Veteran. But he bounced right back and is here at Desperate Measures to face Satan. Satan is no push over and if The Mysterious One was looking for an easy win, I think he would have faced someone else.

JT - There's no question about the ability of both of these men, but I have to say that ?¿? has the advantage here. Why do I say that you ask? Well, ?¿? is the one that sent poor, poor Scott Weber through the announcer's table on Wednesday Night!!!

Nikki - JT!!! He probably would have done it to you if were out there, but you had to pass out because you heard there was gonna be tits shown here tonight, and HA!! Nothing was shown!!! You moron!!!

JT - Oh, so just because I like ?¿? now means I'm a damn moron? What does that make you, I guess you are a slut!!!

Nikki - MORON!!!

JT - SLUT!!!

Nikki - MORON!!!


(JT and Nikki look at Greg.)

GP - Now listen to me and listen to me good. All night long I've been sitting out here listening to you two bitch at each other. Back and forth, back and forth, ALL NIGHT LONG. I'm so sick of it. You two are going to behave, you are NOT going to yell at each other, and if you do, I'll make sure you NEVER, EVER are on television again!!!

JT - Gee, we were just trying to have a little fun.

Nikki - Yeah really, what a jerk.

GP - I can't win!!! I give up... I wanted to talk about a great match coming up here between Satan and ?¿?, but NOOOOOOO!!! All I get is crap from the moron and the slut!!!

JT & Nikki - HEY!!!

GP - What!?!

JT - I thought you had a match to talk about...

GP - Oh wonderful, now you tell me to talk about the match. Fine, I will. Like I was saying, Satan is no push over. Satan is a former IWO North American Champion. His reign was ended in a controversial way, and tonight, with a win can get a title shot at any title he wants except the World. That is something that Satan is looking forward too...

(A clip is rolled of Satan in various matches. We then hear Greg Parker's voice.)

GP - Tonight, Satan steps into his biggest match to date, against a legend in this sport, the mysterious one, ?¿?. Although Satan is a former champion, this could put his name on the map as a legend killer and advance him up the ladder here in the IWO. Satan knows to beat ?¿? he has to be one hundred percent. He can't have any mistakes, and has to hope that ?¿? makes some mistakes. A loss here wouldn't really damage Satan's status in the IWO, but that doesn't matter to Satan. He refuses to step down and let a legend run him over. Tonight, Satan goes into the battefield and hopes to come out alive...

(The clip stops.)

JT - That was touching, I think I'm gonna cry.. *sniff sniff*

Nikki - Shut up!!!

GP - ?¿? is coming into the match on a losing streak. A win is a must for him. His status as a legend is in jeopardy...

(A clip is rolled of ?¿? in various matches. We then hear Greg Parker's voice.)

GP - The Mysterious One, ?¿? has stepped into the depths of hell... Can he find his way out? Or is he fighting a losing battle? Ever since he lost to The Vietnam Veteran he has been very mad. His actions over the past week prove that he is ready for anything. His new bad attitude may just be the key in getting a title belt around his waist. Will he be able to give Satan the Mystery Death Driver and become the number one contender for any title besides the World Title? I guess it is almost time to find out...

(the clip stops.)

JT - That was even more touching than the one about Satan. Now why don't they ever ask me to do voice overs like you and Scott do all the time?

GP - You just don't have the voice JT.


Nikki - Awwww!!! It's ok JT, I think you have a great voice!!!

JT - You do?!? Wanna go out tonight??

(Nikki smacks JT.)

GP - Here we go again...

JT - I guess that's a no!!!

Nikki - YES!!!


Nikki - NO!!!

JT - Now I'm sad...


(The Ring Announcer is entering the ring with his itsy bitsy teenie weenie yellow poka dot microphone. The crowd is chanting, "Satan".. Doesn't that just scare ya?)

Ring Announcer - This match is for the number one contendership for any title in the IWO except the World Title!!! This is a Mystery Death Match, which means, well, ANYTHING GOES!!! And do to the extremist of this match, we ask that the kids don't watch, unless they want to see one hell of a good time!!! And remember, falls count anywhere. So, those of you standing outside the arena because you couldn't get tickets because we were sold out... You might get to see something after all!!! And now...

(The crowd cheers.)

Ring Announcer - Introducing first...

("Am I Evil" by Metallica begins to play. The crowd gets up on its feet.)

Ring Announcer - He is a former North American Champion. He is known for his finishing move, The Death Wish, a move that strikes fear into everyone. He stands 6'3", he weighs in at 263 pounds... Here is... SATAN!!!

(Satan comes walking out the crowd starts cheering.)

JT - How come the fans cheer for Satan? They are all going to burn for this.

Nikki - They are cheering for Satan because of all the lousy things ?¿? has done this past week. He has basically torn apart the entire IWO, FROM BEHIND!!!

GP - I think Satan has ?¿? where he wants him. Satan can see what kind of mood ?¿? is in. He knows that ?¿? is upset and he is going to take advantage of that and I wouldn't be a bit surprised if Satan walked away with a win. It is basically the Mystery Death Driver against the Death Wish. Whichever happens first is whoever wins. And Satan has been asking people, "Am I Evil?"... He better hope he is Evil...

JT - Evil my ass... ?¿? is going to rip him apart, you know that and everyone else knows that...

(The Ring Announcer is ready to bring out ?¿?)

Ring Announcer - And his opponent...

("Sad but True" by Metallica begins to play. The crowd starts booing.)

Ring Announcer - He is a former FWL World Champion, but has NEVER held a title here in the IWO. He is the master of the Mystery Death Match and Mystery Death Driver. He stands 6'5" and weighs in at 285 pounds... He is known to the world as The Mysterious One... ?¿?!!!

(?¿? makes his way out. The crowd is booing him like never before. He seems to be enjoying it.)

GP - Here he comes. He has changed so much. He has a different attitude about things and that could be huge here tonight.

JT - Like I keep saying, nothing matters here, ?¿? is going to beat the living daylights out of Satan and move on to get his first taste of gold here in the IWO. You have to be a complete idiot if you think Satan has a chance at all of winning this match.

Nikki - Well, I guess we are about to find out for ourselves. The match is about to start!!!

(Both men are in separate corners. The ref is now asking for them to come to the middle of the ring.)

JT - What does he think this is, boxing or something!?!

(Both men are in a stare down, the ref is explaining the rules to them. They aren't even paying attention.)

GP - Remember fans, falls will count anywhere in this match, we've seen that kind of a match in the past with ?¿? and that had to be the biggest match in IWO history. Of course I am speaking of Titan and ?¨?.

JT - That was a horrible match, it included cars and various other fun items of DEATH. I doubt Satan will be able to hang around long enough to see cars!!!

Nikki - The fans want this thing to stay in the ring, but we all know it won't.

(The ref is calling for the bell. The two men are still in a stare down.)

*bell sounds*

?¿? shoves Satan. Satan gets up in ?¿?'s face and they start bad mouthing each other. Satan shoves ?¿? down to the mat!!! This brings the crowd up to its feet. ?¿? gets up and tackles Satan down to the mat. He starts throwing rights and lefts to the face of Satan. Satan manages to roll over on top of ?¿? and he starts pounding away on ?¿?. Satan gets up and starts stomping on ?¿?. ?¿? trips Satan up and sends him back down to the mat. ?¿? gets on Satan again and starts punching again.

GP - This is insane. No wrestling moves at all, just an all out brawl. I figured at first we'd see the typical ?¿? match, but I guess with his new attitude even that has changed.

JT - I'm really surprised so far, lets see how the match moves on. If it stays like this, I think it favors Satan.

Nikki - But you just said that Satan had no chance of winning.

JT - Oh well, I guess I was wrong. Big surprise!!!

?¿? gets off of Satan and picks him up, SATAN WITH A LOWBLOW!!! ?¿? drops to his knees, Satan charges the ropes he comes back with a vicious clothesline sending ?¿? all the way down to the mat. Satan with a quick elbow drop down across the chest of ?¿?. Satan pulls ?¿? up, he picks him up and places him on the top turnbuckle. Satan climbs up to the second turnbuckle... He grabs ?¿?.. Superplex!!! Satan rolls over on top of ?¿?.. NOT EVEN A ONE COUNT!!!

GP - The ref didn't even have a chance to get down to make a count before The Mysterious One got his shoulder up.

JT - This match still has a long way to go guys.

Satan can't believe it. He pulls ?¿? up again and slings him into the ropes. He comes back and is caught with a quick kneelift to the stomach sending him back down to the mat. A "Satan" chant has started up in the crowd. Satan starts stomping on the knee of ?¿?. He tries to slap on a figure four leg lock. ?¿? with a quick roll up!!! 1...2...!!! NO!!! Satan barely gets out.

Nikki - Satan was surprised there, he almost lost it all. That was a key mistake by him. He should have worn ?¨? down more if he was going to go for a move like the figure four. I don't think I've ever seen Satan try to be that technical.

GP - I'm sure he is going to try everything in this match to win it.

Satan gets up immediately and jerks ?¿? up. He throws him out of the ring. Satan follows him out. Satan jerks ?¿? and slings him into the guardrail. Satan goes over and grabs a chair. He charges into the guardrail and crushes ?¿?'s face with the chair!!! ?¿? falls to the floor holding his face. Satan starts beating on the back of ?¿? with the chair. Satan drops the chair and pulls ?¿?... BODYSLAM ONTO THE RINGSTEPS!!! The thud is heard throughout the arena. Satan is now looking under the ring, he pulls out a table. This gets the crowd up. Satan sets the table up on the outside of the ring. He goes over and grabs ?¿?. He places him on the table.

GP - This just doesn't look good for ?¿?, he has beaten up so far in this match. I wouldn't be surprised if this did him in.

JT - Satan shouldn't be taking this kind of a chance!!!

Nikki - I agree with JT, for all we know ?¿? could be playing possum.

Satan climbs out on the ring apron and points down to the table. The crowd roars with approval. Satan leaps!!! ?¿? MOVES!!! Satan goes crashing through the table!!!

JT - I told you that he was taking a big risk. It back fired on him and this may be what ?¿? needs to get back into this match and take out Mr. Lucifer.

Nikki - Satan has a lot left in him, I don't think that will hurt his chances.

GP - Don't count anyone out yet guys.

Satan is slowly getting up, ?¿? seems to really be hurt. Satan looks over and sees that ?¿? is still down. He limps over and bends over to pick ?¿?... ?¿? WITH ANOTHER ROLLUP!!! The ref is down to make the count...1...2...NO!!! Satan kicks out at the last second. ?¿? and Satan both get up. You can easily tell that Satan is favoring his left leg. ?¿? sees this and goes for it. He gives Satan a quick kick to the right knee sending him down to the floor. ?¿? grabs part of the table that was broken in half. He slams it down onto Satan's left knee. Satan is screaming out in pain.

GP - Satan must have really hurt himself when he went through that table. The fall didn't look that bad from here, but I guess we don't have a good enough view of things all the way over here.

JT - From what I saw on the monitor here, it looked like his left leg hit the ground before the rest of his body, and trust me, when that happens, it isn't too good.

Nikki - I'd hate to see Satan's big chance end like this.

?¿? picks Satan up and starts taking him toward the back. He rams his head into the guardrail on the way. ?¿? has taken Satan to the back part of the entrance way, over near the sound machine. ?¿? picks Satan.. NO!!! HE RAMS HIM HEAD FIRST INTO THE SOUND MACHINE!!! A loud screech is heard throughout the arena. Fans are holding their ears. Greg Parker, JT, and Nikki have to jerk off their headsets. ?¿? drops Satan to the floor. He starts stomping on him. He is now looking around the machine trying to stop the screeching noise. He starts playing with buttons just as what appears to be a soundman makes his way out. He starts yelling at ?¿? for messing with the machine... KICK TO THE STOMACH!!! MYSTERY DEATH DRIVER!!! The soundman is down!!!

JT, Greg Parker, and Nikki still can't put their headsets back on because of that horrible noise. The fans are starting to go crazy. Finally some more people come from the back to cut the noise off. ?¿? picks Satan up and heads through the entrance into the back part of the arena.

GP - My god, I think I'm deaf now. I'm sorry fans, we couldn't talk for a few minutes, but as you probably heard, that was the loudest noise I've ever heard!

JT - I'm surprised they didn't get electrocuted.

Nikki - I wonder where ?¿? is taking him now!?!

Our cameras go to the back along with the ref, Satan, and ?¿?. ?¿? has found an IWO merchandise stand. Some fans are standing around it. They notice to the two guys brawling. They start yelling. ?¿? slings Satan over the merchandise table to the floor. ?¿? grabs the merchandise table, he picks it up and throws it down onto Satan. The crowd has started a "Satan" chant. ?¿? is now going through the merchandise. He grabs a Satan shirt and wraps it around Satan's neck.

JT - Now isn't that just mean. He is choking Satan with his own t-shirt!!! What's next? Is he going to pin him in hell!?!

Nikki - That's really funny JT.

JT - I know I am!!!

?¿? stops choking Satan. He picks him up and slings him into the wall!!! Satan goes back down. ?¿? looks over. He sees a fan wearing a Satan t-shirt... NO!!! HE KICKS THE FAN!!! MYSTERY DEATH DRIVER!!! THE FAN IS DOWN!!! IWO SECURITY RUSHES OVER!!!

GP - That was uncalled for!!! Why the hell did he do that!?! He has completely lost his damn mind!!!

JT - I like it. Now if he'd only do it to the rest of the morons here in this arena.

Nikki - JT, you are so mean.

GP - It is just because nobody likes him!!!

Nikki - HAHA!!!

?¿? starts punching the security guards!!! They are going down!!! He gets one of them... HE THROWS HIM THROUGH A GLASS DOOR INTO THE PARKING LOT OF THE ARENA!!! The security guard is down!!! Two more guys come from behind ?¿? and grab him by the arms.. HE SLINGS THEM OFF!!! He grabs one of them... MYSTERY DEATH DRIVER!!! The other backs away and runs off yelling for help!!! Satan is UP!!! HE HAS A DAMN BEER BOTTLE!!! Apparently some fan gave it to him!!! ?¿? turns around!!! CRACK!!! IT SHATTERS OVER HIS HEAD!!! The glass goes everywhere!!! ?¿? goes down to the floor!!! Satan is standing over him holding up the bottle!! The fans are going crazy.

GP - The Mysterious One got off track. He went after a fan and security guards. He forgot all about Satan.

JT - No, he thought that Satan was out of it, I guess next time he will think before he acts.

Satan picks ?¿? and slings him through the broken door. They head out into the parking lot!!! Satan picks ?¿? up and puts him on the hood of a car.

GP - If I'm not mistaken that is Deathrow's car!!!

JT - Why do you say that!?!

GP - Probably because the front tag says, "Deathrow is #1"

JT - Good point...

Satan gets up on the hood of the car and drops an elbow onto ?¿?. A dent has been put in the hood. Satan stands up on the hood and pulls ?¿? up. DEATH WISH THROUGH THE F'N WINDSHIELD!!! GLASS IS EVERYWHERE!!! ?¿? is in the front seat of the car now, Satan is down as well half way on the hood and on the dash. The ref is trying to make sure they are still alive... Satan has enough energy to crawl into the front seat of the car. He lands ontop of ?¿?...1...2...NO!!! ?¿? gets his shoulder up!!! Amazing!!! The ref is now trying to ask both men if they want to continue. Satan is reaching around under the seat.. HE FINDS A KEY!!!

JT - That's bright, leave a spare key under the seat!! Way to go!!!

Satan pulls himself up in the driver's seat of the car. He motions for the ref and our cameraman to get in. He puts the key in the ignition and starts it up.

GP - Here we go again... This is dangerous, kids don't try this at home.

Satan is pulling out of the parking lot. He is headed out onto the roadway... ?¿? is coming too!!! He sees Satan driving... HE GRABS HIM!!! HE SLINGS HIM DOWN ONTO THE SEAT!!! THE CAR IS OUT OF CONTROL!!! THEY ARE HEADED RIGHT FOR THE OPERA HALL NEXT TO THE ARENA!!! ?¿? pops up and starts driving... He sees they are headed right for the building... He applies to breaks but it is too late, the car goes crashing through the front door of the opera hall, people are screaming and running out of the way. The car goes flying past the ticket stands, it hits a wall and is stopped. Everyone in the car seems to be out of it. Everyone is bleeding.

Nikki - This is serious. A damn car wreck... I thought this was supposed to be a wrestling pay per view, not a damn demolision derby!!!

JT - This is great stuff, now I'm just waiting to see if anyone can get back up from this. If not I guess nobody wins!!!

GP - I doubt anyone is going to be coming out of this one.

The ref rolls out of the car to the floor of the opera hall. Our cameraman still has his camera rolling, he is the least hurt of all. He gets out of the car on his own power. Satan comes falling out of the passenger door. A man in the opera hall is yelling "CALL AN AMBULANCE"... ?¿? is lying over the steering wheel, it doesn't look good for him. Satan is trying to get up. He stumbles to his feet but falls back down again. The cameraman gets a good look into the car. A stream of blood is coming from ?¿?. Satan is now back up. He has no clue where he is. He is swinging at various people standing around. Luckily he is about 10 feet away from them. The ref is now up. He is looking around. He looks into the car and sees ?¿?. He is yelling for medical help. Just then ?¿? moves his hand over and grabs the ref by the collar!!!

JT - The man is damn super human. There is no telling how much blood he has lost tonight and yet he still goes on. He is obsessed with winning.

GP - this is incredible.

?¿? pushes the ref back down to the floor. He slowly exits the car. He stumbles around. Satan is getting his wits about him. He sees ?¿? on the other side of the car... HE RUNS!!! HE LEAPS TO THE TOP OF THE CAR!!! HE JUMPS!!! BULLDOG DOWN ONTO ?¿? FROM THE TOP OF THE CAR!!! ?¿?'s head goes to the floor!!! Satan rolls him over and goes for a quick cover... The ref crawls over and makes a count...1...2..NO!!! HOW THE HELL DID HE KICK OUT!?! Satan can't believe it. What appears to be the manager of the opera hall comes over. He gets in Satan's face and starts yelling... Satan picks him up in a fireman's carry... DEATHWISH!!! The manager is down!!! The employees are now screaming for help. They are calling the cops.

Nikki - Great, all we need is another IWO event that ends in the arrests of some of our guys.

JT - All I can say is wow, Satan is showing some spunk in this match. If he doesn't win this thing it would be a crime.

GP - There's just no way to call this guys.

Satan picks ?¿? and takes him through some doors... They've entered into where an opera is going on. People have yet to notice Satan and ?¿?. Satan slings ?¿? into some people on the very back row. The people start screaming and the entire area looks back to see the two brawling. Many of the people get up and run out. Satan has ?¿? up... There is a big row of stairs down to the stage... HE SHOVES ?¿? back!!! HE GOES ROLLING DOWN THE STAIRS!!! Satan laughs as he keeps rolling and rolling... The opera continues to go on... Finally ?¿? comes to a stop at the stage. Satan goes strolling down the stairs, he has everything in control. Satan picks ?¿? up and throws him onto the opera stage.

GP - Oh my god... what's this??? IWO does Opera!?!

JT - I just can't picture Satan or ?¿? singing anytime soon.

Satan gets up on the opera stage. He goes over and grabs part of the set, it is a big plant. He throws the plan, pot and all, down onto ?¿?. Dirt goes all over the stage and ?¿?. The opera continues behind the two combatants. Some dude on the stage in a mask walks up to Satan. Satan sees him, he turns around, he picks him up... DEATHWISH!!! The dudes mask falls off. He picks the mask up and drives it into ?¿?'s head. Satan makes a cover... the ref gets up on the stage...1...2...NO!!! AGAIN!!! ?¿? somehow manages to get his shoulder up.

GP - There is so much blood over his entire body, there is no telling how much he has lost. I just can't see how he is going on. He has been hit with everything tonight.

JT - The man is a machine. But he can be beat, if Satan just continues to beat on him, there is no way The Mysterious One can get out of this one.

Nikki - It looks to me like the ref needs to stop this match. I don't think ?¿? needs to go on. He is hurt so bad.

Satan pulls ?¿? up. He slings him into a grand piano, the guy playing it bails out and runs off the stage, meanwhile, the rest of the people stay on stage singing away. Satan picks ?¿? and slams him down onto the piano. Satan climbs up there. He pulls ?¿? up and picks him up in a fireman's carry. He is going for the Deathwish THROUGH the piano!!! ?¿? is fighting it off. He spins out of the firearms carry... DDT!!! Satan's head goes crashing through the top of the piano, a loud DING is heard as the chords to the keys shatter.

GP - MY GOD!!! Look at that!!! You can see Satan's body but his head is buried into that piano. I've never seen anything like that in my life!!! There's no telling what kind of damage has been done to his face.

JT - Those pianos are hard, they are in my opinion one hundred percent stronger than the tables you see out here. Satan could be out of it.

Nikki - Well, from the looks of things, it doesn't look too much better for The Mysterious One.

?¿? is down, but he is moving trying to roll over onto to Satan. Satan has yet to move. Finally ?¿? rolls over, but Satan is face down into the piano, he can't make a cover. ?¿? starts to get up. Just as he stands up the piano collapses sending both men to the floor. ?¿? falls to the stage. Now Satans entire body lies in the pices of the piano. The ref is wondering if he should call the match.

JT - This is amazing. I've never seen anything like this. This is the first time the IWO has ever been to an opera!!!

?¿? is slowly getting up. He is dazed. He stumbles to his feet and stumbles around on the stage. He goes over to Satan and rolls him over. His face is covered in blood, you can't even see his eyes. ?¿? falls onto Satan and the ref goes down to make a cover...1...2...NO!!! OH MY GOD!!! Satan kicks out!!! ?¿? is in shock!!! He can't believe it!!! ?¿? gets up, he jerks Satan up. He is giving the signal for the Mystery Death Driver. Nobody around him has a clue what's going on so nobody cheers. He sets him up... NO!!! Satan manages to flip him over. ?¿? lands back first onto the stage. Satan stumbles down onto the stage. Both men are down once again.

GP - These men are still breathing. That has to say something about them both. The loser of this match can not be overlooked in the IWO. If both of these guys don't a get a title shot, someone on the IWO board should be shot!!!

JT - This is a work of art as far as I'm concerned. The only thing this match lacks to make it perfect is naked women.

Nikki - I'm surprised there aren't women in that opera. There usually are.

The ref has started a ten count. If nobody can get up before the ten count he will rule the match a draw. Satan has started to move a little bit. He is trying to wipe the blood from his eyes. ?¿? is up to his knees. The ref stops his count. Satan has made his way up, somehow. Blood is dripping from his face onto the stage. It is a sick scene. ?¿? is now up, he is in the same shape as Satan. Both guys are limping. SATAN PICKS HIM UP OUT OF NOWHERE!!! DEATHWISH!!! ?¿? face first down onto the stage!!! Satan now trying to roll him over...

GP - This has to be it. There's no way The Mysterious One can get out of this one alive.

JT - I can't believe that Satan is going to win this thing. I guess I just made a fool of myself.

Nikki - I would say what's new, but this is too good to start something with you!!!

A fat woman is coming out on the stage. She stands over Satan and ?¿? and starts singing...


Satan rolls ?¿? over.. He makes the cover.. the ref down to count...1...2..NO!!! THE STAGE GIVES WAY!!! THE WEIGHT OF THE FAT WOMAN IS JUST TOO MUCH TO HANDLE!!! The ref, ?¿?, Satan, and the fat woman go crashing through the stage!!!

GP, Nikki, and JT - OH MY GOD!!!

GP - What does this mean!?!

Satan has come up from the hole in the stage. He pulls himself back up onto the remaining stage. He reaches back down in the hole and pulls ?¿? out... He covers him... The ref is still down in the hole. Nobody is there to make a count. Satan is mad. He gets up and looks down in the hole. The ref is slowly getting up. Satan reaches down and jerks him out of the hole... ?¿? is getting up from behind him.. Satan turns around thinking he is going to pin him... ?¿? with a kick to the stomach... MYSTERY DEATH DRIVER!!!

JT - There's no way!!! He can't possibly win!!!

Nikki - There is always a way JT.

Someone is walking out onto the stage in a mask... The person walks over to ?¿?. ?¿? rolls Satan over to make the cover... NO!!! The person kicks ?¿? in the groin!!! ?¿? doubles over in pain!!! The person takes off the mask.. IT IS KATIE, THE VIETNAM VETERAN'S WIFE!!! She grabs the Mysterious One... NEPALM DROP ONTO THE STAGE!!! ?¿? is out cold!! No!! Katie is helping Satan to his feet....Satan glares at he puts his foot on the Mysterious One! 1....2....WHAT THE F*CK!!? KATIE JUST NAILED SATAN IN THE GROIN!! NAPALM DROP ON SATAN!!! SATAN IS DOWN!! KATIE PUTS THE MYSTERIOUS ONE ON TOP!! 1...2...3!!!


Nikki - I told you that you would see a woman before this match was over, and two women were deciding factors in the match!!! Wait a minute, we've got Katie backstage

(Katie looks at our camera. Big Scott Weber is chasing after her)

BSW- Katie, can we get a word?

Katie - Follow me back to the arena, I have something to say...

(Katie gets off the stage and starts walking up the stairs. Our cameras are now following her back into the arena. Satan, ?¿?, and the ref are out on the stage. They are give out. Katie is now headed through the opera hall door.)

GP - I wonder what Katie is going to say.

JT - There is no telling. All I know is that she really screwed around with this match.

Nikki - But after what he did to her on Wednesday, how can you blame her for this? I think it's great. She is standing up for herself.

(Katie is headed into the back of the arena. She goes through the back of the arena, some fans are back there and are cheering her on. She heads out the entrance way, with BSW close behind.)

BSW- Katie....why did you just interfere in a match that had nothing to do with you?

Katie: I tried. I really tried to be a good girl. All I ever wanted to do was be with my husband while he wrestled. I have never interfered in a match Leo's (The Vietnam Veteran) has been in. I have been willing to let Leo do all the fighting for our family but every time I come out here some jerkoff like ?¿? attacks me. In the past month I have been repeatedly attacked by Ken War, ?¿?, and just this week Zombie attempted to rape me. Well to quote the movie Network I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore.

(Fans cheer)

Katie: Now it is time for the bitch in me to take over. I may only be 5 feet tall and 92 pounds soaking wet but people like the ones I've mentioned are either going to start leaving me alone or I'm going to lay them out. As you can see I've have learned The Napalm Drop from my husband. I've also been learning a few other things from him as well as from Dr. Roberts. I have stood by my man and will continue to do so but now I'm going to start stand up for myself as well.

BSW- Katie, why Satan though? What did he do?

Katie- He gave me that look. I'm going to stand up for myself, I won't let these monsters try and have their way with the wife of the Veteran.

Nikki: (Screaming) YOU GO GIRL!!!!!

JT - Is she soaking wet now, because I thought I smelt something!!

GP & Nikki - JT!!!

(?¿? comes stumbling through the entrance way. He is still bleeding like crazy. He is headed to the ring after Katie. Satan from behind!!! He nails ?¿? with a broom stick!!! They are still going at it. Katie drops the microphone and gets out of the ring. She walks by the two brawling men. Satan yells at her. She turns around. He is holding ?¿?... She smiles... ANOTHER KICK TO THE GROIN!!! ?¿? falls to the floor. HERE COMES THE VIETNAM VETERAN!!! He runs out, he grabs Satan out of nowhere... NEPALM DROP TO THE FLOOR!!!)

GP - Why did he come out here and do that!?!

Nikki - I guess he is trying to protect Katie.

GP - But Satan didn't do anything!!!

(The Vietnam Veteran takes Katie to the back. Satan and ?¿? lie on the floor, both guys bleeding, paramedics rush out.)

JT - This is insane. I don't see how anyone came out a winner in this match. They are both now lying on the floor in a bloody mess, neither man moving.

GP - Well, that is thanks to what Katie and The Vietnam Veteran just did.

Nikki - Is it just me or has The Vietnam Veteran been getting in a lot of people's way lately. I mean he has a match with Zombie tonight and he has a feud heating up with Ken War and now ?¿?, and if he wins his match tonight, either with Titan or Scott Morris. That is a big load for one man to carry.

JT - I don't think he can handle that.

GP - Well, as it stands now, after this match, ?¿? gets a title shot at any title BUT the World Title. But in my opinion, Satan should get a shot at some title as well.

(The paramedics have brought out two stretchers. They are loading both ?¿? and Satan onto them. They are putting a neckbrace on ?¿?.)

GP - Well, it looks like this is the end of the night for these two guys.

JT - They put on one hell of a show though.

(Both guys are being carried to the back to an ambulance. They put ?¿? into the ambulance first. Satan goes in second.)

JT - I don't think it is too bright to put them in the same ambulance.

Nikki - Good point...

(The close the ambulance door... NO!!! They are brawling!!! INSIDE THE DAMN AMBULANCE!!! Our camera tries to get the best view they can. ?¿? is on top of Satan pounding away on him. The paramedics swing open the door and try to pull ?¿? off of Satan. ?¿? grabs the paramedics and pull them into the ambulance. He starts beating on them!!! ?¿? gets out of the ambulance. He slams the door behind. He grabs our camera!!!)

?¿? - We're going on a trip to find the bitch that humiliated me!!! Wanna come along!?! Oh F'N well.. you are coming anyway...

GP - Oh no, ?¿? is going to look for Katie!!! This doesn't look good at all.

JT - This is great!!!

(?¿? goes into the lockeroom. We see Deathrow, Dark Wolf, and Scott Morris. ?¿? starts screaming.)

?¿? - Where is the damn Veteran!!!

(Scott Morris and Dark Wolf shrug their shoulders, Deathrow walks over to ?¿?.)

Deathrow - Hey you mother fuc*er, you are the one that wrecked my damn car. I expect that you will buy me a new one...

(NO!!! ?¿? hits him over the damn head with the camera!!! Deathrow falls to the ground. ?¿? starts stomping on him. Dark Wolf and Scott Morris come over to get ?¿? off of Deathrow. THEY GET HIT WITH THE CAMERA!!! They are down!!! ?¿? storms out of that lockeroom, headed for another one. He sees The Raging One in the break room, he is eating some cocco crispies.)

?¿? - Have you f'n seen The Vietnam Veteran's wife!?!

Raging One - Not today...

?¿? - LIAR!!!

Raging One - Man, I haven't seen her, I think I'd know if I saw a prostitute running around here.

?¿? - Whatever...

(?¿? moves on. He comes to a door, it is marked ladies restroom. He bursts in... He looks around, no one is in there. Just as he starts to walk out, a woman walks in. She screams and runs out yelling for the police. ?¿? heads out of the bathroom and back down the hallway. He stops at another dressing room. He barges into it, we see Titan, Meygon, Jason Nash, and Mad Max all sitting around talking.)

?¿? - You seen The Vietnam Veteran's wife!?!

Titan - No, but I couldn't help but notice that beautiful bulge in your tights, are you that happy to see me!?!

?¿? - Fu*k off...

(?¿? storms out of the lockeroom. Titan, Meygon, Nash, and Max all laughing. ?¿? gets to another dressing room. It is the NWF dressing room. The door is locked. ?¿? starts kicking the door. The door swings open, we see Jack in the Box, nobody else.)

Jack in the Box - What the hell do you want you damn freak.

?¿? - I'm looking for The Vietnam Veteran's wife.

Jack in the Box - He dumb ass, this is the NWF locker room. The Veteran doesn't like the NWF why would his wife be in here!?!

(?¿? gets up in Jack in the Box's face.)

?¿? - I asked a simple question, all you had to do was give me a simple answer!!!

(Jack in the Box shoves ?¿?.)

Jack in the Box - Don't come into MY dressing room and fuc*ing yell at me!!! You want to find the damn Veteran's wife you do it somewhere else, she isn't here.

(?¿? shoves Jack in the Box back... Jack in the Box gets up in his face!!! THEY START SWINGING!!! The NWF comes running into the picture!!! Zombie grabs ?¿? and slings him down to the floor!!! Zombie starts yelling.)

Zombie - You seem to have a direction problem, maybe Satan beat your ass so bad that you don't know where you are. This is the NWF dressing room, we are the stars. Sh*t like you just doesn't belong here. Now throw him out...

(Ken War picks ?¿? up and slings him out into the hall. He hits head first into the wall. The NWF slams the lockeroom door shut. The scene cuts back out to the announcer's table.)

GP - well, it doesn't look like ?¿? is going to find Katie, The Vietnam Veteran's wife. He has been beaten up all night long.

JT - Yeah, I think his night is over, but I know he has revenge on his mind... Now lets move on.

GP-And there we see Zombie and Ken War in the arena and they looking for Katie McGwire, the wife of The Vietnam Vetearn.

Zombie: What is taking so long to find her. I want to get this over with and then go back and destroy the Veteran.

Ken War: Savor this moment Zombie. A world class miler would need 12 minutes to get here. With Veteran he'll need 30 and we've still got 15 minutes left. This is wonderful Zombie.It's like you say. Evil will win because good is stupid.

GP-Katie has got to know that they are looking for her. She's no idiot.

Nikki-There she is!

GP-Nikki is right. Katie is coming down the ring enteranceway. She is looking for cover. She comes down to the ring and UH OH! We now see Zombie and Ken War coming through the curtains! They are smiling.

Nikki-Somebody get some help for this women!

JT-Feel free to jump up there Nikki.

GP-Zombie and Ken War break off and are now on opposite sides of the ring. They are circling Katie, taunting her! Katie is in no mans land!

(Ultimate Warriors original WWF music plays)


JT-How did he get here so fast? No way he could run 3 miles in 15 minutes!!!!

Nikki-Maybe he hitched a ride, maybe he flew but he's here and in the ring as Zombie and War make a grab for Katie.

JT-Now we have a handicap match

GP-No this is still an I Quit matchup!!! Purple Heart by Veteran on Ken War and Zombie!!!! Katie heading for the hills!!!!! Veteran lets go of the double Purple Heart long enough to throw Ken War over the top rope. Zombie now begging off looking for a breather! BOWLING BALL BY KEN WAR ON VETERAN!!!! PURPLE HEART BY VETERAN ON ZOMBIE!!! NOW WE WILL SEE WHICH FINISHER IS THE MOST EFFECTIVE!!!!! BOTH MEN STILL CINCHING IT IN BUT WE HAVE NO REFEREE RIGHT NOW!!!! REFEREE KEVIN PEARSON IS NOT IN THE BUILDING FROM WHAT WE'RE TOLD!!!!!

Nikki- Zombie let go of the Bowling Ball!!!! He's becoming unconcious!!!!! Veteran's still has The Purple Heart on and Zombie is unconcious!!!!

JT-But you can't get Zombie to say I quit when he's unconcious!!!

GP-Now we have another referee coming to the ring. Who is this? I have never seen this referee before. He isn't a wrestler in the federation of that I know for a fact but I've never seen him before.

Veteran: (at the top of his lungs) Say it!! Say it you son of a bitch!!!! Say it!!!!

GP-Veteran has totally lost it. He doesn't even seem to realize that Zombie is unconcious. I don't think he cares either.

Veteran: Say it!!! Say I quit you bastard. Say I quit

GP- The referee is calling for the bell!! What is this?

JT-NO!!!! That's impossilble. How can Zombie say I quit when he's out? That is the only way this match can end is by him saying I quit!

GP-Maybe the ref decided that since Zombie couldn't defend himself he'd award the match to the Veteran. The ref is going over to the ring announcer and explain things

Ring Announcer: The winner of this match is......ZOMBIE!!!!!!


JT-Yes he did it! He got the Veteran to say I quit!


Veteran: YOU!!!!! I'll kill you again!!!!!

GP-Again? Does he know this ref?

Nikki-Something stinks here and it's not JT's cologne!!!

JT-Doesn't matter. It will go into the books as a win for Zombie!!!!

GP-The referee is now running for his life and Veteran is in hot pursuit!!!!!!

Main Event
World Title Match
Titan -c- v. Scott Morris

GP-Now we are ready for the main event of the evening. It is for the biggest title in the IWO. You've got a monster in Titan who is going up again Scott Morris who outsmarted 19 other wrestlers at last months Broken Hearts Broken Dreams. Who can forget it.


Nikki - And just what is Scott Morris doing?!?

BSW-Scott Morris is trying to throw the grappling hook again. He clangs off the rafters and falls back down to Morris. Morris shakes his head and looks around. He heads off somewhere in the arena. Our cameras have lost him.

GP: But it turned out there was a method to his madness

The camera cuts to the top of the arena. We see Scott Morris crawling out on the rafters!!! He is headed for the center of the arena!!!

Nikki - What the hell!!!

Everyone in the ring is looking up at Morris. They know what he is trying to do. They all try to pick the ladder up and set it up. They are trying to make deals with each other... NO!!! They all start brawling again!!! They can't help each other!!! Scott Morris is almost to the center of the rafters...

BSW - I don't believe this...

Morris has made it. He starts pulling the belt UP to him!!! The guys in the ring can't do anything about it. Morris grabs the belt... The bell sounds...

Winner - 'The Blue Chipper' Scott Morris

GP: But during that same PPV and in the time since all Titan has done is defeat opponent after opponent to continue his reign as the #1 wrestler in the federation. Lets take a look at that footage

BSW- Both men starting to one can believe Titan kicked out of the one could've expected that. Titan and Inferno are both up now....Inferno kicks Titan, BACKDRAFT!!! NO!!!! He can't get Titan up!!! Titan headbutts him in the groin!! Low blow!! Inferno falls down!! Titan grabs Inferno by the throat....we're going to the top!!! Inferno up at the top....TITAN X-PRESS!!!! TITAN FINALLY HIT THE TITAN X-PRESS!! TITAN GETS A HAND OVERTOP INFERNO!!! 1.......2.......3!!! TITAN WINS!! TITAN BEAT INFERNO!! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!

GP: So it would appear to be the basic brains vs brawn matchup here. Scott Morris can not go toe to toe with Titan and have any chance of victory. Then again who CAN get into a slugfest with Titan and win? He's a monster!

JT: There isn't a wrestler in this entire federation who can defeat Titan right now. On their best night they couldn't do it.

Nikki-Once again I must disagree with you JT. Morris was able to get past 19 of the toughest superstars in the federation. That has to count for something. Plus no matter how much you praise Titan who has been willing to defend the title against all comers he is human and if he isn't ready for this man or if he takes his opponent too lightly he can lose and Morris is more than capable of making him an ex-champion.

GP-Hang onto your hats everybody. If this night hasn't been crazy enough for you already get ready for this title match

Ring Announcer: Ladies and Gentleman, this contest is for the IWO World Heavyweight championship! It is scheduled for one fall with a 60 minute time limit. First let me introduce to you the official for this matchup. He is the senior referee of the IWO, here is Craig Zablocki!!!!!

(Some cheers mostly boos but the referee takes it in stride with an embarrassed smile)

Ring Announcer: Here are the contestants for this title match. First the challenger (Father Of Mine by Everclear plays). He won the right for this title shot last month by winning the 20 man ladder battle royal. He weighs in at 254 pounds. He goes by the nickname The Blue Chipper and is prepared to live up to that reputation tonight. He is Scott Morris!!!!!!!

(The crowd cheers)

GP-Here comes Scott Morris, he is all business and I don't think he even knows that he's being cheered tonight. He comes into the ring and just stands in the middle awaiting the arrival of his opponent.

Ring Announcer: And his opponent for this title match is a wrestler who needs no introduction anywhere in the civilized world today. Not because he is seven feet one inch tall, not because he's 324 pounds, but because he is the IWO Worlds Heavyweight Champion of the world and has continued to reign in dominant style. Tonight he looks to continue his reign. Ladies and Gentleman, being led to the ring by Zombo here is TITAN!!!!!!

(The crowd boos loudly as "Ode" by Creed plays)

JT-Here comes the dominant force in the IWO. Scott Morris better relish the time he has in the ring tonight because he'll never get a caliber match like this ever again.

Nikki-Scott Morris may not have the height or weight advantage but sometimes the bigger they are the harder they fall

JT-(Sarcastic) That a way girlie, break out the cliche machine.

GP-The referee is calling both wrestlers to the middle of the ring.

Referee Craig Zablocki: Gentleman, This match is for the IWO heavyweight title. A decision can be earned by pinfall, submission, countout, or DQ. You must....must break on the count of 4 because I will disqualify you on the 5 count. If you are thrown out or leave the ring on your own then you will have a 9 count to get back in the ring. On the 10 count I will call for the bell and you will be counted out. My count is like this 1...2...3...and so forth. Scott Morris, because you are the challenger in order to win the title you must either defeat Titan either by pinfall or submission in order to win the title. If you win by disqualification or countout you will not get the title. Gentleman, do you have any questions before we start this match?

GP-Niether man with a question

Referee Craig Zablocki: Then go to your corners I'll be inspecting you for foreign objects. If either of you attack while I am inspecting I will end the match right now and disqualify you. Now go to your corners and do not come out until I call for the bell.

Nikki-Zablocki definatly laying down the law here tonight.

GP-Zablocki who has many years of experience as an official and is consistant in his calling of a match. Zablocki over to Titans corner and checking him over and seems satisfied. Now he's over to Scott Morris's corner and he does the same for the challenger. He seems satisfied and now calls for the bell and this match is underway.

JT- Don't leave your set folks, this match won't be long.

GP- Both wrester's circling the ring and they lock up. Morris throws Titan into the ropes but as he comes off Titan takes Scott Morris down with a swinging neckbreaker. Titan goes for a bodyslam, but Scott Morris pulls Titan down with a small package. We get an early cover 1...2 and a solid two by Scott Morris.

Nikki-Morris is taking advantage of Titan's overconfidence.

GP- Scott Morris whips Titan into the ropes, but Titan reverses it. Scott Morris misses with an elbow as Titan misses with a clothesline at the same time but as Scott Morris moves by he stops in his tracks and hits Titan with a kick to the stomach. Scott Morris whips Titan into the ropes, but Titan reverses it. Titan kick Scotts Morris in the mush with such power that Morris is put through the ropes and lands outside of the ring.

JT- That's right. Morris can't match up against Titan. Morris got a fluke title shot.

GP- Scott Morris reenters the ring but Titan is waiting for him. Titan whips Scott Morris into the ropes and connects with a clothesline. Now Titan is going for the pin. We've got 1, we've got 2 and Morris kicks out. Still too early for either man to get a pinfall victory. Titan pulls Morris and and connects with a right hand dropping the challenger. Titan picks up Scott Morris and bodyslams him before dropping a series of elbows. Titan hits a sitting dropkick on Scott Morris. Scott Morris is being knocked goofy right now. Titan goes for a cover.! Not quite three but there wasn't much on that kickout either. Titan picks up Scott Morris and whips him into the ropes. Scott Morris hits Titan with a shoulderblock/spear combination, call it what you want. Scott Morris takes Titan down with a side russian leg sweep. Scott Morris goes for a splash, but Titan rolls out of the way.

JT-HAHAHAHAHA what an idiotic move by Morris!

Nikki-Morris what trying for a coup de grace but it failed and now Titan is back on the attack as the fans boo Titan.

GP- Titan takes Scott Morris down with a two fisted axhandle to the shoulder blades. Titan taunting Scott Morris to get up and his opponent is struggling to obligue him. Titan grabs Morris and throws him into the ropes. Titan misses with a clothesline but before he can turn around Scott Morris jumps on Titan's back and is executing a sleeperhold!

Nikki- Hold on Morris! Hold on!

GP- Titan is caught into the middle of the ring. He's looking to make it to the ropes if he can. Titan with a step closer to the ropes. Morris trying to keep the hold on. Referee Craig Zablocki constantly checking to see if the sleeper turns into a choke. It doesn't take much to do so. Titan with another step to the ropes. He's almost there Titan falls forward into the ropes. His neck whiplashes against the bottom rope as he fell. This could be a break for Morris. Referee putting the count on Morris to break the hold. He's up to 3, 4 and just before the 5 count Morris lets up. Scott Morris dragging Titan to the center of the ring and Morris dropping down onto Titans knee. Trying to keep the big man from being able to stand up. At this level Titan is no monster. Titan is the same size as Morris. Morris with an anklebreaker on the same leg. Morris kicking the back of Titan's leg trying to charley horse it. Now a version of an indian death lock. Not quite a sharpshooter, not quite a figure four, sort of a hybrid of the two. Titan using his length advantage to grab the ropes again and Zablocki calling for the break. Titan getting up on his one good leg and Morris grabs hims. Morris throws him into the opposite turnbuckles but Titan holds his ground and throws Scott Morris into the turnbuckle and as he comes off Titan hits Scott Morris with a clothesline. That was total arm power by Titan since he couldn't anchor his legs to make the blow more effection. Titan punching away on Scott Morris who isn't going down. Now Morris is down but he gets back at Titan with a quick legsweep. Morris runs into the ropes and hits Titan with a clothesline. Titan falls out of the ring with Scott Morris quickly following him.

Nikki- Titan now in no mans land as Scott Morris actually picks him up and puts Titan down with a bodyslam.

GP- Scott Morris whips Titan into the guardrail. The champ is in trouble. Scott Morris grabs him and (CRACK) hits Titan with an inverted power bomb and breaks our announce table. Nikki and JT were able to get out of harms way as was I.

Nikki- Take a look guys. Titan is bleeding. SEE! He's no machine. He's good but he's just a man and if a man can be cut he can be beaten

GP-But now Zombo comes from behind and distracts Scott Morris. Titan takes advangate and executes a chop on Scott Morris. Titan and Morris reenters the ring at about the same time. Scott Morris hits Titan with a kick back to that bad leg and Titan trying to beg off. Scott Morris runs into the ropes. Scott Morris hits a clothesline on Titan who falls against the referee. The ref is a little shaken but he's not out. He is holding his ribs a little bit but seems to be able to continue.Titan harassing some fans in the crowd who are getting on his case. Scott Morris hits Titan with a kick to the midsection. Scott Morris goes for a facebite, but Titan blocks it.

JT-Morris is getting frustrated and is now restorting to cheap shots to try and win

GP-Titan hits a chop on Scott Morris. Titan kicks Scott Morris in the chest and now another one to the face. Titan wiping off some of the blood that has gotten into his eyes but as he does so Scott Morris hits Titan back. Scott Morris kicks Titan as well. Morris picks up Titan and drops him across the top rope Scott Morris locks Titan again in a sleeperhold!!!!! Titan is valiantly trying to break the hold. Titan reaches the ropes and again Morris must break the hold. Scott Morris hits the rope but misses with the shoulderblock. Titan however conected with a kick but it was with the bad leg and he's holding it again. Scott Morris again going for the a splash, but Titan gets his knees up. Scott Morris lands on the knees but Titan is hurt just as bad by this defense.

Ring Announcer: 15 minutes have elapsed. 45 minutes left.

Nikki-This has been a very evenly fought match in spite of the predictions from the so called experts. Morris is proving that he is deserving of a title shot and he can still come away as the winner.

GP-Both men get up but Morris grabbing Titan and executing a backdrop. He goes for the cover 1...2...thre-not quite yet. Titan is hurt but he's not finished yet. Scott Morris runs into the ropes and hits Titan with an elbow before rolling the champion outside the ring again. The crowd is really getting behind Morris. Morris with a roundhouse right followed by a hiptoss onto the steel steps surrounding ringside. Morris chops Titan. Morris has got to be careful of the count which is up to 5 already. He can't win the title on a countout. The count is up to 8 as Morris throws Titan back into the ring and quickly follows before 10 is reached. Morris with a reverse knife edge on Titan. Morris goes to the ropes but misses the flying dropkick. Morris is hurt and Titan picks him up. Power Bomb by Titan. With authority and he goes for the cover 1...2...not yet! Morris isn't finished yet as Titan tried to end it with one fell swoop.

GP-Now the champion is taking the offensive here and he kicks Morris to the midsection. Titan to the ropes and nails another kick this time to the face again. Titan throws Morris into the turnbuckle and starts to run his face repeatedly. 7 times, 8 ,9 and he waits for a second before doing it a 10th time. Pulling Morris away before Zablocki can count ot 5 he executes a face plant on Morris. Now Titan picks up Morris and just dumps him over the top rope as quite a few boos are can be heard

JT-What is it with these idiot fans? I mean they are looking at the greatest wrestler in the world today and they dare to boo him? They should be getting down on their hands and knees bowing before him and kissing his feet. Maybe after he finishes off Morris they'll give him the respect he deserves.

GP-Titan gets a full nelson on Morris and now repeatedly running Morri's head into the steel post and now its Morris who is busted open. Both men are bleeding now. Titan gets back into the ring before the ref can count 10 and Morris does the same. Titan goes for a kick to the midsection, but Morris counters it with yet another legsweep. Titan's legs still seem to be hurting from the attack early on from the challenger. Morris runs into the ropes and a dropping head butt by Morris onto Titan. Morris with a bodyslam on Titan. There is definate power in Scott Morris. Again Morris goes for a bodyslam, but Titan blocks it and he gets achokehold on Morris. Zablocki counting....he's up to 4 and Titan lets go in time.

Nikki-I'm surprised. I thought Titan would go for the DQ and thus even though he would lose the match he'd keep his title.

JT-Listen you peroxide bimbo. Titan is going to beat Morris because he can do so quickly and easily.

Nikki- We are getting close to the 20 minute mark of the match so there goes your theory out the window right off the bat.

JT-Titan is playing with him. When he's ready he'll put this pretender out of his misery.

GP- Titan throws Morris into the ropes but misses with a kick but he catches the challenger on the return trip. Titan picks him up and what a monster powerslam!!!! He's going for the cover 1...2...thr-NO!!!! You have got to be kidding me. A move like that would have eliminated any normal wrestler. Now Morris thrown into the ropes but he ducks under the clothesline. Off the other side and again Titan misses. Off the ropes and DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE AND BOTH MEN ARE DOWN HARD!!!! NIETHER MAN IS MOVING!!!!!

Nikki- Just think this is the first time the action has stopped in the entire match.

GP-The referee is putting a count on both wrestlers. Morris is crawling over to Titan. Morris flops over Titan and Zablocki counts. 1...2...and Titan kicks out. Morris gets up and kicking Titan all over his body. Kicks to the head, the back, the legs, knees, ankles, anyplace a boot can kick Morris is kicking him and the crowd is loving it. Morris going for a bodyslam but Titan counters with an elbow to the back. That will slow Morris down. Morris now goes down with a knee lift but again Titan is becoming his own worst enemy by using his legs for moves that he should be doing. It is dangerous

JT-That just shows you how badly he wants to keep this title.

GP-Titan goes for a facerake, but Morris blocks it but Morris comes back with a facerake on Titan. Morris whips Titan into the ropes and misses with an elbow connects with a kick in the guts.. Titan thrown into the turnbuckle by Morris. Morris charges but Titan moves out of the way. Morris's shoulder just kissed cold steel and it is not very forgiving. Titan executes a rare dropkick on Morris.Titan nails Morris with a back suplex as the crowd is back to booing the champion. Titan grabs Morris but Morris pulls titan down with a simple armdrag takedown on Titan.

Nikki-Morris trying to catch his breath while keeping Titan immobile.

Ring Announcer: 30 minutes have elapsed. 30 minutes remaining

GP-We are now halfway through the match at this point. Titan seems to be frustrated that he is being pushed like this.

Nikki-The longer this match goes the greater advantage Morris is going to have. He's not carrying the body weight that Titan is.

JT- Titan can go all day and all night long. Don't you worry about it.

GP-Morris is up and pulling Titan with him. Reverse Neckbreaker on Titan from Morris. A cover 1...2... and no! Morris up again and abulldog on Titan. Another cover 1...2... thre? NO! Another kickout. Morris pulls Titan up and a well executed German Suplex by the challenger. 1...2... and Titan kicks out but Morris still has the hold on and another German suplex. 1...2... thre----can you believe this!!! Morris with another German Suplex and a cover but Titan is close enough to the ropes that he can grab it so there is no count this time. Morris picks up Titan and BULLDOG!!! That's got to be it 1...2...thre-NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!! Some way! Some how! Titan has kicked out yet again. Look at Morris. He's complaining to the referee about a slow count but his counts have been very consistant. The ref has got to be in great condition to be able to going up and down for all these counts.

JT-Morris is making the big mistake now. He's not wrestling Craig Zablocki the referee. He's wrestling Titan and every second he's spending argueing with the ref is allowing Titan to recover and Titan is resting, trying to catch his breath.

GP-Morris goes back to Titans arm who couldn't even respone. Titan may be out of gas. Titan is needing a second wind right now while Morris is still going strong. Morris picks up Titan and throws him into the ropes but Titan reverses. Titan misses the clothesline and Morris gets him into a crucifix. A cover have got to be kidding me. Once again Titan has kicked out.

JT-Morris's frustration is getting the best of him. It is causing him to lose his composure.

GP-Morris whips Titan into the ropes and misses with a clothesline. Titan off the other ropes and he misses with a clothesline. Both men try the ropes and Titan nails Morris with a kick to the midsection. Titan doesn't seem to be limping so much now but there is still the matter of the blood he lost earlier in the match. Morris had a cut that bled but it appears those cuts will not have al long term effect. Titan picks Morris up. He's going for a suplex, vertical style. Titan is holding Morris up.

Nikki-8...9...10...11...12...13...14...15...Si- Almost 16 seconds Titan held him upside down for that vertical suplex.

GP- And all that blood running to the brain causing a possible blackout. Titan isn't done yet. He has gotten his second wind and now bodyslams on Morris. Now Titan standing on the back of Scott Morris. Remember that is 324 pounds standing on the back of the challenger. Now Titan with a big splash to the back of Morris and he goes for the cover and Morris kicks out. The fans are really getting into this match as there has been close to a dozen near falls so far.

Nikki-This match alone has been worth the cost of the PPV.

JP-That last statement of yours has proven beyond a resonable doubt that you are not a true blonde. That was actually an intellegent statement and as we all know blondes never have anything intellegent to say.

GP-Titan picks up Morris and with a head butt drives him to the mat. Titan pulls Morris up with a little difficulty but throws him into the turnbuckle and follows it up with a clothesline. Effective 1-2 punch by the champion. Now Titan with repeating kicks to Morris's body. Some to the head, some to the body. Titan with another suplex, this time a more conventional suplex on the challenger and he tries for the cover 1...2... and again Morris is kicking out.

JT-Titan is giving the signal. He's saying its over

GP- Titan is going for his move. The Titan X-Press but before he could pick Morris up he gets thumbed into the eye. Morris had that move scouted and was prepared. That is actually the first time either man has tried to go for their finisher. Morris hasn't been given the chance to do his but until now Titan hadn't had a chance to do his either The crowd is really behind Morris here right now. Morris kicks Titan. Another German suplex on Titan. This time A release German suplex so he couldn't hold it for the pin. Both men are not moving again. They are sooooooo tired at this point.

Nikki- What is the time factor. How far into the match are we?

JT-It has to be past 40 minutes already.

GP- I don't know how much time is past but I hope my voice will allow me to continue to work until this match is over with. Morris nails Titan with a roundhouse right then whips him into the turnbuckle. Morris charges again and this time connects with a shoulder being driven into Titans abdomen. Morris repeatedly driving the shoulder until the ref is at 4 when he stops and pulls back. If Morris had gotten DQ'ed at this late stage of the match he would have never forgiven himself.

Ring Announcer: 45 minutes have elapsed. There is 15 minutes to go.

GP- This is incredible. 45 minutes have gone by and we still don't have a winner. Both men starting to exchange rights and lefts. Its a question of who has more in reserve and right now its Titan. He's starting to rock Morris. Titan goes for a power bomb, AND HE CONNECTS!!!! WE'VE GOT A COVER 1...2... OH COME ON!!!!! I don't believe this but some of the fans are actually starting to cheer for Titan. Titan nails Morris with a lariat that sends Morris back into the ropes where Titan goes for a bodyslam. Morris is blocking it and now both men are exchanging chops. Again its Titan who is getting the advantage here. Titan picks Morris up and BRAINBUSTER!!!! That's got to be it. 1...2... there is still some fight left in Morris. Titan picks up Morris and goes for a suplex but its blocked. Morris with a Belly to Belly Suplex on Titan! How could he have gotten the energy to do that one!!!! Morris to the ropes but he misses with the elbow but gets up in time to nail Titan with a clothesline as the champion tries to get up. Morris punches away on Titan before executing a standing dropkick on the champion. We have a cover again Titan has kicked out. Morris with a gutwrench suplex on the champ and he holds onto it. Another gutwrench suplex and a third one. Again a cover. Will this be it. 1...2... NO!!!! Morris picks up Titan and throws him into the ropes and a sloppy clothesline. Not much behind it because he's so tired so he grabs the head and bulldogs the champ. Morris holding onto the head for a headlock takedown.

Ring Announcer: 50 minutes have elapsed in the match!! 10 minutes left!!!!

GP- That got Morris's attention. Morris dropping double axehandles after double axehandles to the back of the prone Titan. Morris goes for the cover 1...2...thre-Yet again Titan has kicked out. Morris picks up Titan and throws him into the ropes. He goes for a clothesline but Titan grabs Morris and executes a belly to belly suplex!!!! Cover by Titan 1...2... NO!

Nikki-This is getting intense. All these two counts, all those kick outs. Both men are soooo tired. Its amazing they can stand after all the punishment they've had to endure.

Ring Announcer: 9 minutes left in the match.

GP-Titan calling for the Titan X-Press again. Last time he tried it his eyes were raked. Titan picks Morris up and tries to press him but his arms won't give him the strength at this point of the match to execute the move. Morris takes advantage and performs a double underhook suplex. Once again both men are not moving and can you blame them.

JT-Hang on Titan! You've only have to hold on for another 9 minutes.

Ring Announcer: 8 minutes left in the match

GP- Morris picking up Titan and delivers a right hand. That seem to get the big man's attention. Morris with another right and now Titan with a right hand back. Both men exchanging blows right now. Titan grabs Morris by the head and they both go into the ropes. Morris is thrown off and goes into the ropes. As he bounces off Titan drops him with a shoulder block. He goes for the cover. 1...2.. and another kickout. Titan now sits on top of the challenger and just pounding away with rights and lefts until he is too exhausted to throw any more punches. Something has got to give here.

Ring Annoucer: 7 minutes left in the match!

Nikki/JT: Come on Morris/Titan

GP-As you can see my partners want to see a winner and so do the fans but we are running out of time here. Less then 7 minutes and now its Morris who is on the offensive. Driving knees into the head of Titan. Another cover 1...2... kick out by Titan. Another pin attempt and a strong hook of the leg 1...2...and yet again kick out by Titan. Titan and Morris up. Titan thrown into the ropes and as they come off they knock heads and flops to the gound

Ring Announcer: 6 minutes left in the match!!!!!

GP-Time is a problem right now for the challenger. If he wants to win this match he's got 6 minutes left but what can he do that he hasn't done yet? Morris pulls Titan up and is going for a suplex but he can't lift him up. Titan trying for a suplex but is equally tired. They are now exchanging slow and sluggish rights and lefts hoping to find the one blow that will knock the opponent out. This is beginning to look like the Holyfield-Lewis fight. Thank goodness there are no Don Kings running this federation. Titan head butts Morris but there is little behind it. Both men go down

Ring Announcer: 5 minutes left.

GP-Zombo is coming over to where Titan is and is imploring him to make one final stand. The crowd is starting to chant very adult comments to Zombie that we won't dignify by repeating but it is giving the champ something. That first head butt didn't have anything behind it but it seemed to wake Titan up. The second head butt looks a little stronger. Morris is groggy but he grabs Titan by instinct and throws him into the ropes. Clothesline again by Morris who tries again.

Ring Announcer: 4 minutes left!


Ring Announcer: 3 minutes left!!!!

JT-This match will end in a draw for sure now.

GP- Morris crawling over to the left side of the ring. Titan doing the same to the right side. Both men are exhausted as they pull themselves up and stagger to the center of the ring. Fists are being thrown again, some kicks are added. Now its Titan who is thrown into the ropes but Morris puts his head down to soon and a double axehandle to the back of the neck.

Ring Announcer: 2 minutes left

GP-Morris drops to the mat and Titan goes for the cover 1...2... this is crazy! Another kick out! Morris is pulled up and Morris reverses a throw into the ropes. Titan comes off and clotheslines Morris! Morris is staggering. Titan picks up Morris for a suplex. NO TITAN IS FIGHTING TO POSITION MORRIS FOR SOMETHING! A PILEDRIVER? NO ITS NOT THAT. MAYBE A POWER SLAM!!! NO!!! NOT A POWER SLAM. MORRIS CAN'T DEFEND HIMSELF!

JT-Here it comes!!!!

Ring Announcer 1 minute left! 60 seconds!

GP-Titan has him in position! TITAN X-PRESS!! TITAN X-PRESS! TITAN HOOKS THE LEG 1...2...3!!!!!



Nikki-Thank you for admitting that Morris deserved this shot. While I'm sorry he didn't win he pushed Titan harder than anybody ever has.

JT- But the fact is that Titan is still the champion. That is all that matters.

GP- JT has a point there. The bottom line is Titan walks away with gold around his waist, and Scott Morris goes home with a handful of "What If's" in his mind. Folks, a quick announcement....President Jamie has ordered that §atan will get a title shot at a title to be announced at Hostile Takeover this week!! §atan didn't win his match but he proved himself to the board!! We've run out of time, so we're going to leave you tonight with a preview of next month's pay per view, entitled "Blood Showers '99!" Thanks for joining us, we'll see you on Friday at Hostile Takeover!

(a clip of kids dancing in a park...)
Kids- April Showers bring May Flowers, April Flowers bring May Flowers....