ASK A LUCHADOR VII
The cameras are rolling but the screen is black. The lights switch on and the picture if filled with the face and mask of La Flama Blanca. "Ask A Luchador" appears over his head.
La Flama Blanca: Hola mis amigos! Welcome to another episode of “Ask A Luchador” hosted by The Luchador himself, La Flama Blanca. It’s good to be here, it’s good to be back! Thank you for tuning in!
The camera pans out to get a full shot of La Flama Blanca in his theatre room, seated on his leather couch. He’s only wearing his mask and a robe. Interesting.
La Flama Blanca: I know you are all wondering why I’m all squeaky clean and in a bath robe… Well if you must know, I’m going out. Don’t worry about that…
A promo shot for the sponsor appears on your screen with The Luchador’s face right next to it.
La Flama Blanca: Tonight’s show is sponsored by Smith and Forge’s Hard Cider. Honestly, one of the best ciders around. Pick some up and watch the UTA. Follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook. On to the show. Questions, from you, the fans! First question, Voice Over Guy!
Voice Over: Amy from Kent, Washington wants to know, "Whose cruel idea was it to put an 's' in the word 'lisp’?"
The Luchador turns his head slightly.
La Flama Blanca: Mine, next.
Voice Over: Devon from York, South Carolina wants to know, "If 'con' is the opposite of 'pro', then is congress the opposite of progress?”
Blanca shakes his head as he speaks.
La Flama Blanca: I never thought of it like that… shut your mouth beat nut! Next question!
Voice Over: Storm from Elmhurst, West Virginia wants to know, "Are you one with the earth and spirit?"
La Flama Blanca: I don’t know what that means. Two shows in a row with weird questions. People that believe in that crap are idiots with swiss cheese brains. Live in the real world, it sucks, it’s all about the money and the fame. Without that you are nothing but a disposable commodity. Wooo, got a little too hyped, it’s okay, next!
Blanca fixes his robe to cover himself better.
Voice Over: Tyler from Bridgewater, New Hampshire wants to know, "Do cemetery workers always the graveyard shift?"
La Flama Blanca: No, someone is definitely there during the day. You can bet on it.
Voice Over: Jose from Brentwood, New York wants to know, “Cuando vas a tomar lo que es legítimamente suyo?"
La Flama Blanca: Antes de lo que piensas, lo prometo, next!
Voice Over: Keri from Chester, Illinois wants to know, "Why is it only drug dealers and software developers call their clients 'users’?"
La Flama Blanca: They’re all slaves to substance. We all are… Kind of scary when you think about it… It’s that time of the show for the Did You Know? Fact of the Day. Did you know that Australia’s Lake Hillier is pink? Pink lakes are rich in salt and attract pink colored bacteria during certain temperatures. Lake Hillier is salty but the color never changes and they haven’t figured out why… Probably the perfect temperature those those pink colored micro organisms… Anyway, back to the show!
Voice Over: Randy from Plymouth, Mississippi wants to know, "Why does Mickey Mouse wear pants and no shirt while Donald Duck wears a shirt and no pants?”
The Cruiserweight shakes his head from side to side. The questions these people submit.
La Flama Blanca: Probably because Donald’s dong is in his body and Mickey’s isn’t. Stupid jerk… Next!
Voice Over: Darnel from Dover, Kentucky wants to know, "Sweet or Sour?"
La Flama Blanca: Both, actually going to get Chinese food tonight. Getting me some sweet and sour chicken… Taking a honey out to NYC! I got to finish getting ready. Thanks for tuning into another episode of “Ask A Luchador”. Adios amigos. Oh and Madman… my show is better than yours.
Show Credits
- Segment: “ASK A LUCHADOR VII” – Written by will.
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