It had only been a short time since the first FWF PPV which had been titled ‘Make America Wrestle Again’ by the FWF management, with the hope of getting some free marketing from the current President of the United States of America. Despite not being able to get a retweet from Trump, the PPV had lived up to its hype with the first ever FWF Champion being crowned, the arrival of the infamous Bobby Dean who had brought a new championship belt with him and the first PPV win for one Harry Black.
Black had walked into the PPV telling the world that he was going to pick up his first FWF win in his singles match against Lance Mingle. In truth the win had been coming with Black’s performance getting more impressive on each FWF show with the Englishman getting closer and closer to getting that elusive first victory. After taking Kentucky Tarzan to a draw, narrowly losing to Kenneth Williams in the World Title tournament and then putting in an impressive showing in the battle royal, it was Lance Mingle who would be first to fall to Harry Black in a FWF ring.
In truth Lance Mingle had put up more of a fight than Harry had initially expected, but despite coming into the FWF with the intention of keeping his head down and picking up an easy paycheck, the combination of the closeness of his matches and the shrinkage of the paychecks left Harry Black with a motivation heading into the PPV that he hadn’t felt in years. Unfortunately for Lance Mingle he ended up on the wrong end of this motivation and Black picked up the victory.
Now with the decade about to come to an end Harry found himself back in Las Vegas after the relocation of the FWF ahead of January 2020. With no better place to be on New Year’s eve, Harry was ready to hit the town and see how his luck would fall after a brief date with an FWF correspondent desperate to get a word and some content for the FWF website.
It had been quite a while since Harry had been in a hotel room with a woman, so he made an effort. Here he was dressed in a black suit with a black shirt in a posh Las Vegas hotel room with the lovely Donna Perry. Sure he had bought the black suit from a charity shop, the hotel room had been rented by the hour by the FWF and Donna Perry was only here for a five minute interview and had brought her cameraman, but that didn’t change facts!
Even if things didn’t pan out with the pretty interviewer, tonight Harry was going to be hitting some of the top spots in Las Vegas looking to capitalize on his recent PPV appearance which he was hoping was going to ‘grease a few wheels’ for him around town.
Sitting opposite to Harry Black was FWF correspondent Donna Perry. Black had never met Perry before, but he was just glad that the FWF hadn’t sent Mellissa Diaz over to conduct the interview after getting off on the wrong foot with her on the very first FWF broadcast.
Harry sat patiently as Perry made sure her cameraman was in place with his iphone and that her microphone was set up properly before kicking the interview off. Harry looked out the window at the Las Vegas skyline contemplating how his luck had changed in just a few short weeks whilst waiting for the first question.
DP: “Well Harry, thank you so much for joining us here on New Year’s eve of all nights but the FWF management thought this would be a great chance to get ahold of the roster for them to reflect on the start of the FWF and what the future and the new year holds for all the fans out there! Now let’s start off with your PPV victory on the last FWF show, what were your thoughts after the match?”
Black smirked to himself as he thought about the pain that he felt from the grueling match before giving an answer that he was actually comfortable with the world hearing and he thought would make him look cool and sophisticated in front of Perry.
HB: “Well I remember being handed a paycheck after the match and thinking that I haven’t seen a number like that in a long time!”
Perry shifted on her seat, slightly uncomfortable with the answer from the Englishman and the weird wink he gave her afterwards.
DP: “And what about your opponent on the night, Lance Mingle?”
HB: “You know what I didn’t have any respect for Lance Mingle going into that match… and I think I was justified in that decision. It’s no secret that I am out of shape and not at the top of my game right now, but I still beat him!”
Harry noticed Donna Perry look uncomfortably up at her cameraman who shrugged his shoulders.
DP: “Well…. Ok then. I am sure Lance Mingle will be interested to hear those thoughts of yours. How about the PPV as a whole? Did you enjoy the rest of the event?”
Black tried to cast his mind back to the event that had been held on Christmas day last week. The celebrations that preceded his match seemed to have had a big impact on his memory that he had first thought.
HB: “Well to tell the truth it’s a big of a blur. I remember my match, but then I was pretty busy getting changed and getting the hell out of there! No hang on, something is coming back to me… didn’t some fat guy come out in a Santa costume or was that at the after party? I’m really struggling to place things here Donna, help me out!”
DP: “I think you are thinking of the arrival of ‘Beautiful’ Bobby Dean in the FWF. The FWF fans have been pretty excited that he made his debut and brought the Hardcore Championship with him here to the FWF!”
Black looked really confused as he placed a hand on his chin and adopted the ‘thinking’ pose.
HB: “Are you sure that it was ‘Beautiful’ Bobby Dean? I mean I shared a locker room with him a few times back in the day but he was a small guy…. You know a midget?”
Donna Perry squirmed uncomfortably in her chair again, was midget currently a politically correct term?
HB: “But this Santa guy, no he was a big fat guy! I didn’t realise that the belt he brought in was a Hardcore Championship but let me tell you right now I want no part of that!”
DP: “How so Harry? You wouldn’t like to get yourself some FWF gold in the future?”
HB: “I’ve seen these hardcore type matches and I got to say that being hit with things or being put through things isn’t really my bag…. But hey if it’s gold we are talking and it’s bring your own belt to work day then how about I just make up my own title? I will call it the Harry Black Championship and instead of hitting people over the head with barbed wire baseball bats to win it all you have to do is be the best looking guy named Harry Black!”
Black noticed Perry give the cameraman a look that he had seen a lot of the FWF interviewers give the cameraman since he arrived in the new federation and started getting interviewed. It was a look that read ‘who the hell is this guy and why are we wasting our time with him?’
DP: “Well we have to wrap this up Harry as I am sure that you will want to get your New Year's Eve festivities started. One last question for you though, how do you feel about being booked for the next FWF show here in Vegas against Chad Chaos?”
The question drew a blank look from Harry Black. It was the first that he had heard about being booked for another match and the name Chad Chaos wasn’t ringing any bells either. Donna Perry looked less than impressed with the blank that Harry Black was drawing.
DP: “Come on Harry you must know who Chad Chaos is, you eliminated him from the battle royal a few weeks ago on Pandemonium #4?!”
Black shrugged his shoulders, he had uncharacteristically eliminated a lot of people that night and Chad Chaos wasn’t standing out as particularly memorable.
DP: “He attacked you with the rest of the CoV on Pandemonium #2 in your match against Kentucky Tarzan? This is being built up as a big grudge match between the two of you to settle the score on the first FWF show of the new decade!”
HB: “Honestly what you are telling me sounds vaguely familiar but a lot of alcohol has been consumed since those events and I am having a real hard time placing this Chad Chaos chap. From what I can remember he might as well have not shown up in the FWF at all! Now tell me seriously thought, if the FWF management are building this up as some big blow off match is there the potential for there to be a little extra in the pay packet this week? Christmas is an expensive time of the year and there might even be a late present in it for you Donna!”
Harry was lying, he hadn’t bought anyone a Christmas present for years, one of the few perks of having no friends. Donna Perry didn’t look to impressed as she gave the cut throat sign to her cameraman to tell him to stop filming before hurriedly packing up her equipment.
DP: “Sorry Harry, I don’t really get to make those kind of decisions. Now thanks for your time, we will get out of your hair and let you get down to your celebrations.”
Perry quickly started to make her way towards the door looking like she couldn’t get away from Black quick enough.
HB: “Well if your out later and want to catch up when that clock strikes midnight?”
Perry looked disgusted at the lame attempt to hit on her by the FWF wrestler, something that she experienced all of the time. However for some reason she took pity on Black and reached into her purse for something.
DP: “Well thanks Harry but I am pretty busy tonight. I have something in here for you that might really help you out though, call it a late Christmas present.”
Black hadn’t received a christmas present of his own for years either, but didn’t know if he should be grateful or offended as he was handed the business card of an image consultant by the FWF interviewer, before she made a hurried exit out of the door with her cameraman right behind her.
Harry walked back towards the window as the door to the room clunked shut leaving him alone with his thoughts again. He flipped the business card for the image consultant between his fingers as he looked out at the bright lights of the Vegas strip, his PPV pay burning a hole in his suit pocket. It seemed that 2020 would start with a match against a man that had apparently been a thorn in his side since the very start of the FWF in the form of Chad Chaos. Now Harry didn’t really know much about Chad Chaos apart from what he had just been told by Donna Perry apart from the fact that he had a name which had seemingly been randomly generated on one of those fan fiction Internet sites, but the potential of winning a bigger slice of the winners purse due to it being a grudge match was tempting.
For the last night of 2019 Harry decided to put to the back of his mind all thought of his past and future opponents, the image consultant whose card he held in his hand and the potential of a pity kiss from Donna Perry on the stroke of midnight.
He would be ending the year just as he had seen it in, face down in the gutter somewhere with some fresh vomit down his suit.
"I NEED CHEESEBURGERS"
- Kentucky Tarzan