(total blackness. a heartbeat. "Internet Wrestling Organization" fades in on the screen, and just as the heartbeat ends, the words fade out. Again. Again. A fourth time, but this time the words stay on the screen. Suddenly, a bolt of lightning is heard and the words set ablaze into a blue flame. The words remain there on fire for a moment, then fade out... ..)
("Hot to Death" by Everlast plays as the scene fades into the Target Center in Minneapolis, MN. The crowd is on their feet screaming... .it's impossible to hear anything. Greg Parker (GP), Tedd Roxx (Roxx), and JT are screaming their lungs out to no avail at the announce booth, as their voices are drowned out by the sound of a sold out arena waiting for the action that lies ahead. For a good 5 minutes a heavy fireworks display goes off as the PPV Promo, as seen on IWO Online, runs through on the IWO-tron, and even afterwords the pop is deafening. Things calm down after a good while... .and the announcers begin to speak.)
GP- WELCOME EVERYONE!! WELCOME TO THE TARGET CENTER!! IT'S AUGUST 22ND... .HEATSTROKE '99!!
Roxx- AND A SPECIAL WELCOME BACK TO THE HORNY ONE, TEDDY ROXX!! THAT'S ME, FOR ALL YOU PUNKS THAT DON'T KNOW!
JT- IT'S STILL TOO F*CKING LOUD IN HERE!! I CAN'T HEAR MYSELF THINK!!
GP- HAVE WE GOT A LINEUP FOR YOU TONIGHT FOLKS!! ALL SUMMER LONG, THE IWO HAS BEEN BREWING FOR THIS DAY IN HISTORY... .MALL BRAWL III IS AT HAND!!
Roxx- Finally... I can hear myself. Mall Brawl III will be a match, you're damn right... .but my money is on Jamie Cozy against John... ..John put his status as IWO Vice President on the line, so he's got a lot riding on this one tonight!
JT- No no... .you're both wrong. The match of the night, hands down... .Psycho Jay v. Ashton Cain. The two of these guys have given everything they've got for it... let's see if Ashton can right the wrongs from the feud these two had so long ago.
GP- Our first match is about to get underway, let's get to the ring!!
Chris Wyndorf v. Joey Rappoport
JT- Come on, Joey Rappoport, one of the best wrestlers in the IWO,
against the guy with the weird last name? Are you kidding me?
GP: My apologies to Chris Wyndorf for JT's retarded comments.
JT: Are you calling me retarded??
GP: If the shoe fits, wear it
Roxx: Hey GP, lay of my buddy, or I will have to mess you up
GP: Sure you will
Ring Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, our next match is a grudge match with
a twenty minute time limit. The first competitor weighs 245lbs and is 6'3".
He is "The Space Lord" Chris WYYYYYYNDROF!!
(Domination by Pantera begins to play on the P/A system and Chris Wyndorf
comes out to a medium sized pop. He jumps into the ring and starts to
Ring Announcers: The other man stands 6'3" and weighs 238 and 1 half pounds.
He is a member of the Upper Class, a two time former IWO world champion, and
the master of the Kamikaze Kick. He is, JOEEEEEEEY RAAAAAPOPORT!!!
(My Own Worst Enemy by Lit begins to play and Rappoport walks out to a large
pop. He steps into the ring and the bell sounds.)
Gp: The fans are pretty much devided on this match wouldn't you say Roxx?
Roxx: They are divided alright, divided on how many seconds it will take
Joey to dispose of this man!
JT: You tell him
GP: The two men are circling eachother, Rappoport grabs Chris's leg and
executes a dragon screw leg whip, but Chris quickly trips Rappoport and the
two men stand back up.
JT: Come on! Some one grab the other one and kick some @$$
GP: Good JT, keep it up (sarcastic)
GP: They lock up in a collar and elbow tie up, Wyndorf nails an arm drag
takeover and arm bar.
Roxx: Wow, this match is over twenty seconds old and Wyndorf is still in
there, I am surprised!
GP: You would be
Roxx: What does that mean?
GP: Good Roxx
GP: Rappoport gets back to his feet and nails three sharp elbows to Wyndorfs
stomach, breaking the hold. Rappoport goes off the rope and nails a huge
JT: Does Wyndorf still have his head on??
Roxx: Somebody ask the lost and found if they have seen Wyndorfs head
GP: Rappoport is now unrelentlessly kicking Wyndorf, the ref finally pulls
Joey away and Joey shoves the ref.
GP: That is a good way to get disqualified
Roxx: The ref should never stop violence, that is what makes this sport what
JT: You said it
GP: Are you two married by any chance?
JT: GP you are cruising for a bruising
GP: Am I?
GP: Wyndorf gets up and Rappoport quickly nails a dropkick and Wyndorf is
sent to the outside
Roxx: Now the fun begins
JT: Wanna bet how many pints of blood Wyndorf loses
Roxx: Hell yes, I pick 4, how bout you GP?
GP: I pick 2, but not 2 pints, two new announcers!
GP: Rappoport goes to the outside and rams Chris into the steel ring steps.
He then DDTs Chris on the concrete!
JT and Roxx together: We want blood!! We want blood!!
GP: I want new announcers, I want new announcers
GP: Rappoport picks up Wyndorf and shoves him back into the ring.
JT and Roxx: BOOOOO
GP: Wyndorf gets up and blocks a punch from Rappoport. He nails him with his
own and another and another. Rappoport is stunned. Wyndorf goes off the rope
and nails a flying forearm!
GP: That is why they call him Space Lord
JT: Why? Is he an alien?
GP: Yes, that is why they call him that (sarcasticly)
GP: Wyndorf goes to the top rope, he nails Joey with a missile drop kick!!!
1.. no! Joey quickly kicks out.
Roxx: That move had no effect on my man Joey
GP: Your man?? Hmm... that explains a lot
GP: Wyndorf grabs Joey by the hair and whips him to the outside. He goes off
the rope, Tope Con Hilo!!
JT: What did you call me??
GP: Joey grabs Chris, they are heading back to the lockeroom. He rams
Chris's head into the guard rail! Chris is busted open!!!
JT and Roxx: YES!!!
GP: Rappoport tries it again, but Wyndorf blocks it and goes for a
superkick, but Joey ducks and nails the Kamikaze Kick!!!!!
JT: Its over
GP: He can't pin him on the outside, now can he?
GP: What is going on? Rappoport, instead of bringing Wyndorf back to the
ring, is going over to the soundstage. He sets up a table and lays Chris on
it. He is slowly climbing the stage!! OH MY GOD!! Frog splash onto Wyndorf
who was on the table!!
Roxx: Now this is what wrestling is all about!
GP: Joey hurt himself, as well as Chris with that move. Both men are down.
JT: I think Rappoport may have just taken himself out of this match!
GP: That is the first intelligent thing I have ever heard you say!
JT: I am sorry, I didn't mean to
GP: That is what I thought
GP: Both men are up and are slowly walking back to the ring.
Roxx: Still not enough blood for my taste
GP: Both men are up and back in the ring. Rappoport swings at Wyndorf, but
Chris ducks and nails a DDT! Wyndorf quickly runs to the outside and under
Roxx: Where is he getting all this energy??
JT: Duh, he is from outer space remember?
GP: Wyndorf emerges with two chairs and a table.
JT: The ref has lost all control of the match
Roxx: You're telling me
GP: Wyndorf grabs the chair, runs at Joey and nails him right between the
eyes!! Rappoport is busted wide open!! Blood is pouring from his face
Roxx: OOOOOO YEAH I am starting to like this
JT: Me too!!
GP: Wyndorf swings at Rappoport again but somehow Joey ducks and nails a
spear sending Chris flying to the canvas!!! Joey slowly gets up, blood has
just masked his face and he is having vision problems. He slowly walks over
to Wyndorf and from out of no where he nails a spinning doctor bomb!!!!
1... ... 2... ..NO! Chris somehow kicked out.
JT: This has turned out to be a great match
GP: Hmm I remember someone saying that it would be
JT: Shut up
GP: Wyndorf is down and the cut on his head has opened up and he is caked
with blood. Rappoport grabs the chair and places it on
Roxx: What is my man doing now
GP: He isn't your man
Roxx: Thats what you think
GP: OOOKKK we won't be talking to Teddy anymore
GP: Rappoport is climbing the ropes, OH MY GOD!!! A flying elbow from the
top rope on to the chair on Wyndorf's face!! Wyndrof's face is covered in
blood. Rappoport, instead of making the cover, he places the other chair on
Wyndorf's chest. He climbs the ropes, OH MY GOD!! Centon bomb from the top
onto the chest and chair of Wyndorf!
JT: This is what I like to see, uncensored violence!!!!
GP: Wyndorf is in real pain, the ref is checking him out, Wyndorf is
spitting up blood, he may have internal injuries. The ref is about to stop
the match, but Wyndorf won't let him!
Roxx: He has more guts than brains
GP: You have more everything than brains
GP: My point exactly
GP: Wyndorf slowly gets up, he is holding his ribs, Joey runs at him for a
clothesline, but Chris ducks and nails a tiger bomb!! Both men are down.
Chris slowly makes his way over, 1... ..2... ..3NO! Rappoport somehow, someway
kicked out of the tiger bomb!
JT: Thats what made him a two time champion
GP: Both men are hurt and bleeding profusly. Wyndorf gets up, as does
Rappoport. Wyndorf misses with a superkick and Joey nails the Kamikaze
Kick!!! Joey nailed it, Joey nailed it, Wyndorf is down!!!!
Roxx: GO JOEY, GO JOEY
GP: Come on Chris get up!!
JT: Stick a fork in that man, he is done!!
GP: Joey slowly walks over to Wyndorf and falls across him,
1... ... ..2... ... .3NO!!!!!
GP: Wyndorf kicked out!!!! Wyndorf kicked out!!!! He escaped the Kamikaze
Kick!! Unbelievable. Rappoport can't believe it
Roxx: How the hell did he do that??
JT: No one ever kicks out of the Kamikaze Kick!
GP: Rappoport is screaming at the ref, Wyndorf is up! He grabs Joey, Space
Bomb!! Chris nailed the Space Bomb!!! Joey is out! Wyndorf covers 1... ..
JT: Get up Joey!!!!
GP: 2... ... ...
Roxx: Come on man, get up!!
GP: 3NO!!!!!!!!! Joey got the shoulder up at 2 and 7/8! Both men are just
JT: I knew that he was going to get up
GP: Is that why your shirt is drenched with sweat??
JT: Shut up
Roxx: YEAH shut up
GP: Good Roxx, keep up the good announcing!
GP: Both men are up and they can barely stand. Joey goes for a punch but he
misses and spins around, Chris catches him and nails a dragon suplex!!! He
bridges, 1... ..2... ... NO!! Joey somehow kicked out
Roxx: Where is he getting this??
GP: Chris picks up Joey, but Joey thumbs him in the eye, Joey comes off the
rope and goes for the Kamikaze kick again, but Wyndorf ducks and nails Joey
with a spear right to the back!!! Joey is down and he is grabbing his back
in pain. Wyndorf runs over and locks him in the Space Crab!!! He has it
locked on in the center of the ring!!!
JT: Joey hold on!!
Roxx: Come on Joey!!
GP: Joey is starting to lose consciousness!! The ref is checking the arm,
1... ... .2... ... 3NO!! NO NO Joey held the arm up!! Wyndorf is in shock!!
Roxx: I told you!!
GP: Wyndorf lets go of the Space Crab and yells at the ref.
JT: What a jerk, did he actually think Joey would submit??
GP: You did!
GP: Joey is slowly getting up, Chris is yelling at the ref. Joey comes off
the rope for the Kamkikaze Kick, Wyndorf sees him and ducks, Joey nails the
ref!! Joey nailed the ref, the ref is out cold!!
Roxx: Take advantage, no holds barred!!!
GP: Joey goes for the Kamikaze Kick again, Chris again ducks and nails the
Space Bomb!! Chris nailed the space bomb. Chris picks up Joey again, Space
Bomb!!! Joey is almost out!!
JT: Uh oh
GP: Damn right uh oh!!
GP: Chris again picks up Joey for a Space Bomb but instead nails a jumping
DVD!!! Joey is out cold on the mat!! Chris covers, but there is no ref!! The
ref is in La La Land.
Roxx: By the time another ref gets here Joey will have won the match!
JT: For sure
GP: Wait, from the back!! Another ref runs into the ring!!
1... ... ..2... ... 3NO!!!! JOEY KICKED OUT!!!! He kicked out!!
JT: Of course
GP: Chris brings Joey to his feet, he whips him to the ropes for a
clothesline, but Joey ducks and goes for a dropkick, but Chris dodges him.
Chris quickly runs on top of Joey, he is again locking him in the Space
Crab!!! He has it locked in, he is in the center of the ring!!! Joey is
crying out for help!!
Roxx: He will easily get out
JT: Of course
GP: Joey is in emmense pain. OH MY GOD!!!! OH MY GOD!! JOEY TAPPED, JOEY
TAPPED!!! WYNDORF HAS DONE, WYNDORF HAS DONE IT!!!
Roxx: NO WAY!!
GP: WYNDORF HAS DONE IT, HE HAS DONE THE IMPOSSIBLE, CHRIS WYNDROF HAS
DEFEATED THE TWO TIME IWO WORLD CHAMPION, JOEY RAPPOPORT!!!
Ring Announcer: And you winner at by submission of the Space Crab at 17:22,
he is "Space Lord" Chriiiiiiiis Wyyyyyyyndorffff!!!
JT: I can't believe my eyes, Joey lost!!
GP: Damn right he did!!!
Roxx: Shut up GP!
JT- No way... .I just can't believe Rappoport tapped out to Wyndorf.
GP- Wyndorf may see his career skyrocket from this win. The Canadian has a great future ahead of him now!
Roxx- Yeah Yeah... .shut the f*ck up!! Let's just get to the next match, ok?
Chris Calhoun vs Login Douglass
GP: Our next match pits two men who haven't really made a name for
themselves yet in the IWO.
JT: So in other words, a really boring match!
GP: No that would be any match involving you.
JT: Shut up.
Ring Announcer: Ladies and Gentlemen, our next match is a grudge match with
a 20 minute time limit. Making his way down to the ring, he stands 6'4" and
weighs 269lbs, he is LOOOOOGIN DOUGLAAAASSSS!
(Self Esteem, by Offsrping explodes onto the P/A system and Douglass makes
his way down to the ring.)
Ring Announcer: And now making his way down to the ring, he stands 6'6" and
weighs 275lbs, he is CHRIIIIIS CALHOOOOOUN!!
(Ruff Ryders National Anthem, by DMX begins to play and Calhoun comes
sprinting down to the ring)
GP: The bell sounds and Calhoun quickly jumps on Douglass. He hits him with
lefts and rights.
JT: Someone is a little anxious
Roxx: You can say that again
JT: Someone is a little anxious
GP: Good JT
GP: The ref pulls Calhoun off and the two men lock up. Douglass grabs the
leg and trips Calhoun. He quickly grabs the leg and locks Chris in a
kneebar. Chris is in a lot of pain but manages to reach the ropes and Login
breaks the hold.
Roxx: Come on, do something laidies!!
GP: Don't call yourself that!
GP: Login goes for a clothesline but Chris ducks and nails a superkick!
1... ..2..no! Douglass gets the shoulder up!
JT: Close call, hey, did you guys notice the last three letters of Login's
GP: Thats very good JT, keep it up (saracasticly)
GP: Calhoun grabs Douglass and whips him to the outside. Calhoun comes off
the rope, baseball slide right to the face of Douglass!!
Roxx: That HAD to hurt
GP: Douglass is down, what the hell is Calhoun doing?? Calhoun is up to the
top, OH MY GOD!!!! 450 Splash from the top rope onto Douglass on the
floor!!! He is insane!!
JT: Now this is more like it!
Roxx: This is turning out to be a good match!
GP: Calhoun is propping Douglass against the post. He swings, OUCH!!
Douglass ducked and Calhoun smashed his hand into the steel post!! Calhoun
is grabing his hand. He goes to punch Douglass but Login grabs the arm and
nails a DVD on the outside!!! OH MY GOD!! DVD on the concrete! He is nuts
GP: Calhoun could be seriously hurt. We had better get a doctor in there!!!
The paramedics are coming down to the ring. They are wheeling Calhoun
JT and Roxx: BOOOO!!
Ring Announcer: And your winner at 3:13 LOOOOG-
GP: Wait a second!! Calhoun is back. He is limping to the ring. The match
has been restarted!!! Calhoun climbs into the ring and is met with a
dropkick by Douglass.
JT: Why did let him come back? He is gonna get slaughtered
Roxx: I know
GP: Douglass is landing kicks left and right. Calhoun is almost out.
Douglass picks up Calhoun, POWERBOMB!!! Calhoun is hurt, 1... ... .2... ..3NO!
Calhoun somehow, got the shoulder up!!!
Roxx: Lucky, lucky
GP: Douglas bodyslams Calhoun and climbs the ropes. He is taking a lot of
time, Calhoun is up!! He runs off the rope and shakes it and Douglass
stradles the turnbuckle!!
JT: I hope he wasn't planning on having kids soon!!
GP: Calhoun is climbing the ropes. He is setting up for a superplex, OH MY
GOD!!! Top rope brainbuster by Calhoun. Douglass is down!!
1... ... ..2... ... NO! Douglass kicked out, Douglass kicked out!
Roxx: Where are they getting this from??
GP: Calhoun picks up Douglass, he is going for the Smackdown!!! Wait,
Douglass reverses, Paralizer!!! Douglass has Calhoun locked in the
Paralizer!!! He is in the center of the ring. Wait a second. Calhoun flips
over the back of Douglass! He rolls him up!! 1... ... .2... ... 3NO!!! No, no
Douglass escaped at the last possible
JT: That was a close call.
GP: Douglass grabs Calhoun, powerbomb!!! Douglass is going up to the top, he
goes for a moonsault, but Calhoun moves!!!!
Roxx: Thats gotta hurt!!!
GP: Calhoun grabs Douglass, he nails a brain buster!!! Douglass is out!!
Calhoun goes to the top rope, Tumbleweed leg drop!!! He nailed him! He picks
up Douglass and sends him to the ropes, he nails the Smackdown!! He hit, he
hit it!! Douglass is out!! 1... .2... ... 3!!!! Calhoun wins it!!
JT: Good match.
GP: That wasn't so bad, was it?
Roxx: Nah... ..they still both suck, but now not as much.
GP: Good. Glad you liked it. Time to get set for the next match.
Raging Flame Beer Match
Al Coholic v. Inferno
Ring Announcer: The following match is scheduled to be a Flaming Beer Bottle Match!
(Crowd cheers loudly.)
Ring Announcer: The rules are simple. At ringside there is a table, on that table are three beer bottles and gasoline with a lighter. The first person to set a beer bottle ablaze and hit it over his opponents head is the winner!
(Crowd cheers. "Got The Life" by Korn plays as Al Coholic emerges from the backstage area. The crowd goes wild.)
Ring Announcer: And coming to the ring at this time, weighing in at 221 pounds, he is AL COHOLIC!
("Firestarter" by Prodigy plays as Inferno comes out from the back. The crowd gives him some major heat.)
Ring Anouncer: And coming to the ring at this time, weighing in at 335 pounds, he is INFERNO!
JT: There's the man right there.
Roxx: What you talking about, boy?
JT: He has it in the bag, I mean, look at him. He is four inches taller than Al.
Roxx: We'll see, kid.
(Bell rings and they both lunge at eachother.)
GP: Look at them start it up with a collar and elbow tie up. Inferno turns it into a headlock, and Al runs him to the ropes, clothesline by Inferno. He runs to the ropes again and Al goes under, and Al with a cross body block. Al gets right back up and tries a legdrop on Inferno, but he gets up too fast. Al gets up and runs to the ropes, he tries a... doesn't matter because Inferno just hit him with a spinebuster.
JT: That was a momentum stopper.
Roxx: Yeah, it was real fast paced until then.
JT: What can I tell ya'? Inferno's the man!
GP: Inferno picks up Al and runs him to the ropes, and he back body drops him! He runs to the ropes and comes off with an elbow drop, and another, and another! He picks up Al and bodyslams him. He goes to the middle rope, and a big splash! Inferno jawing at the crowd, and they give him some real heat!
JT: Boo yourselves, show some respect for the three time North American Champ.
GP: Inferno picks up Al slowly, and he puts him in a headlock. He runs for a bulldog, but Al pushes him off! Inferno get right back up, and gets a forearm shot! And he gets up, a leg drop! And an elbow! And he picks him up and body slams him, and hooks in an armwrench!
JT: Damnit, no! Inferno is better than that!
Roxx: Obviously not.
JT: Shove it, kid, Inferno rocks.
Roxx: I'm sure he rocks your world and all. But this is no place to talk about your sex-life.
JT: Inferno will make you pay, Roxx.
GP: Okay! Now Al Coholic lets go and pick up Inferno and throws him to the outside. He goes up to the top, and comes off, but Inferno with a shot to the gut. He goes under the ring and pulls out a chair. Al Coholid turns around, DAMN WHAT A SHOT!
JT: That i gonna make him sore in the morning.
GP: Inferno i heading to the table with the beer bottles. He is gonna try and soak one, but Al Coholic from behind! Inferno dropped the bottle and it broke!
JT: That idiot! Only two left.
GP: Now Al is taking the bottle pieces, what is he doing? He takes the beer bottles and gasoline, and he is putting them aside, wait a minute, he takes the gasoline and pours it on the table, and he sets it on fire! And he puts the bottle pieces on it! He takes Inferno to the top, oh my god, he is gonna put him through that table! He is setting up for the Happy Hour onto that thing, but Inferno reverses into a superplex into the ring. Lucky him.
Roxx: He would have been toast.
JT: But Inferno always overcomes.
GP: Now IWO officials are coming down to ringside to put out that table. Someone could get hurt on that thing.
JT: I wanna see someone put on fire.
Roxx: It'll be Inferno if anyone.
GP: The officials have fixed it and gotten another table. The two beer bottles and lighting materials are back on. In the ring Inferno and Al Coholic getting up. Inferno up first and he elbows Al down. And he starts kicking away at his head. He has Al up, and he ties him up in the ropes! Al is stuck!
JT: Quick thinking by the man.
GP: Inferno now kicking at Al, and punching him. Closed fists are illegal but this match anything goes. Al is out. Inferno goes to the outside. What's this? He gets a chair. Oh no, he goes in the ring, and he whacks the chair on Al Coholic's head!
JT: YES! YES!
Roxx: C'mon, Al.
GP: And Inferno hit him with the chair again! The chair is stuck to his head! And Inferno gives him a big boot with that chair on his head and sends him to the outside! Al is out cold. Inferno jawing at some fans at ringside.
Roxx: Big mistake.
JT: Ahh, the fans are distracting him! Throw 'em out!
Roxx: It's Inferno's fault.
GP: Inferno going to Al, and he picks him up, and whips him into the guardrail! And clotheslines him into the crowd! Al landed in some first row seats. Inferno steps into the crowd, and starts punching away at Al. The fans just jeering at Inferno. Inferno grabs a chair, and smack it across the back of Al. He is taking Al higher into the stands. He picks him up, and he gives him a fallaway slam into the next row! Inferno now stepping back to the ring.
JT: Get the beer bottles, win!
GP: I think he is going for the beer bottles. Now he is getting the gasoline, and he's soaking the bottle. He gets the lighter, but it isn't working. He can't get the lighter to work.
Roxx: What an idiot!
GP: Wait! Al from the crowd. He starts wailing away at Inferno, they are just brawling! Inferno on the upperhand. He throws Al into the ring. And he goes in, but Al gives him a legdrop to the back of the head! Al is resting in the corner. He gets up and pick up Inferno with him. He throws him into the corner, and he goes to the middle turnbuckle! He wails away at his head!
Roxx: 1, 2, 3...
JT: Don't count.
Roxx: 4, 5, 6...
JT: I'll beat you down.
Roxx: 7, 8, 9...
JT: Don't you dare say...
GP: Al backs off and starts hitting him in the corner. He kicks him in the gut, DDT! He picks up Inferno and runs him to the ropes, Inferno ducks a clothesline, and he goes to Al with a forearm shot! Al back up, but Inferno hits a spinebuster!
JT: Look at that, Al, flat on his back.
GP: Al rolls outside of the ring, and he goes to the table with the stuff on it. Inferno follows. He grabs Al from behind, but Al hits him with a beer bottle!
JT: That idiot, now there's only one left!
Roxx: But he still knocked out Inferno.
GP: And now Al puts Inferno across the table. He is going on the ring apron. He is gonna put Inferno through that table. He is up, but so is Inferno! Inferno hooks him, INFERNO GIVES HIM THE BACKDRAFT THROUGH THE TABLE! AL IS OUT COLD! Inferno is grabbing one of the beer bottles, and the gasoline! He's gonna end the match!
JT: Yes, Inferno i gonna win this thing!
Roxx: Probably, I mean, Al Coholic just took a Backdraft through a table.
JT: HA! He admits it.
GP: Inferno having a hard time lighting the bottle. He soaks the bottle in the gasoline. And he has lighted it! Inferno has the bottle, and he is gonna hit Al... wait a minute, where did Al go? Inferno is looking all over for Al, but he isn't there? He is checking all over ringside. He checks under the ring, what the hell? He just got knocked out by, IT'S AL! HE WAS UNDER THE RING! He just hit him with brass knuckles! But Inferno dropped the bottle, there are no bottles left! But he is still fighting him! He takes a table from under the ring, and another, now three tables are in the ring!
JT: What is this drunk freak thinking?
Roxx: He has something up his sleeve.
GP: He is taking the tables and he sets them up. He has them stacked in a row. One after another. He is going to get Inferno, but Inferno is up and starts punching at him. He rolls Al into the ring. Al uns to the ropes, but Inferno with a kick to the gut, A POWERBOMB THROUGH THE FIRST TABLE! HE PICKS AL UP AGAIN! HE RUNS HIM TO THE ROPES, POWERSLAM THROUGH THE SECOND TABLE! He is calling for the BACKDRAFT! He sets him up!
JT: YES! DO IT!
GP: WAIT! AL REVERSED INTO A BACK BODY DROP THROUGH THE TABLE! HOW DID HE GET THAT MUCH STRENGTH!
Roxx: He is all buissiness in that ring tonight.
GP: Both men are down for the count here, but no knockouts aren't counting.
JT: C'mon Inferno, get up!
Roxx: Get up, we need action here!
GP: I think Inferno and Al showing signs of life. Al is rolling down out of the ring. Inferno wobbly getting up. Al goes under the ring and grabs a chair. He slides it into the ring. Inferno looking the wrong way. Al with the chair.
GP: WHAT A SHOT! INFERNO OUT COLD AND AL SITTING IN THE CORNER! Inferno will feel that tommorrow morning. Al Coholic gets up. He picks up Inferno, DDT ONTO THE CHAIR! Al gets back up. He goes over to the side of the ring. He is looking for a beer bottle.
JT: Check his locker.
GP: Al sees all the broken bottle pieces. He is picking them up, and he puts them in the ring. What is he doing? He put them on a chair. He is setting up Inferno for a Piledriver onto the broken bottle pieces and that chair! But Inferno with a low-blow!
JT: Quick Thinking.
GP: Inferno picks up Al, and he bodyslams him onto the broken bottle pieces and the chair! Both men are down, and Al wreching in pain! Inferno picks up Al, and he takes the broken bottle pieces and puts them on the remaining table.
JT: Yes! Put that freak through it!
GP: Now Inferno has Al, he sets him up on the top rope, A SUPERPLEX THROUGH THE TABLE WITH BOTTLE PIECES ON IT! HOLY S***!
JT: Oh my god, a swear word from Greg?
Roxx: We get that on tape?
GP: I always swear, what the f*** are you talking about?
JT: Nothing, just thought maybe you were a mamma's boy.
GP: You can go f*** yourself.
(JT shuts up, a little astonished by GP's rage.)
GP: Inferno is really giving it to Al. Al now is getting a bunch of fists to the face. Inferno picks up Al and starts jawing at the crowd. Big mistake. He throws Al down again and goes to jeer at the crowd. He should really stop that. He goes and pick up Al, he runs him to the ropes, Al ducks a clothesline, and he comes off, Inferno with a kick to the gut, and a suplex... wait, no, Al isn't going up, Al reversed the suplex, HAPPY HOUR! HAPPY HOUR! HAPPY HOUR! WHAT A REVERSAL! BOTH MEN DOWN!
GP: Look at the destruction! The broken tables and bottle pieces inside and outside of the ring! And now both men out cold in the ring.
JT: Inferno has been delivering most of the punishment, you know.
Roxx: Whatever you say, kid. Hey, Greg, who was the one who just delivered the Happy Hour?
GP: Al Co...
JT: Ahh, shut up.
GP: I think some movement is happening in the ring. Al Coholic moving first. He get up, Inferno getting to his feet, but Al Coholic kicks him in the head. He pushes him into the corner and unloads a barrage of boots to the chest. He picks him up and puts him in the corner and starts giving him some stiff punches. He takes Inferno by the hair and gives him a snap mare takeover. And an elbow drop, followed by a legdrop. Al is getting a second wind here.
Roxx: Second wind? I think this is the third or fourth.
GP: He picks up Inferno again and throws him to the outside. He goes up top. Souble axehandle to the back! Inferno down again. Al Coholic goes and gets the ring bell. He is about to... NO! Inferno with a big foot to the head. And he takes the bell. And he hits it across the head of Al Coholic.
JT: That's what I call a hangover!
Roxx: No kidding.
GP: Now Al Coholic being led around the ring by Inferno. Inferno takes him and runs his head into the guardrail. He is leading Al up the aisleway, beating him senseless along the way. He takes Al, and a suplex on the aisleway. He picks him up for another, and lands it! He is giving Al a hard time.
JT: As always.
Roxx: We can do without your pointless comments, boy.
GP: Inferno brings Al in a headlock along the aisleway. He beats him in the head, and he starts throwing him around. He takes Al into the backstage area. He is trying to fight back but Inferno holds a tight grip. He brings him into the locker room and starts throwing him into lockers. He takes a shoe and goes for a hot to Al, but Al sneaks away and gives Inferno a low-blow! And he takes his head and throws him into a locker. Wait, that is Al's locker! Al goes in it, and he pulls out some cooler.
JT: What does he keep in there?
Roxx: Take a wild guess.
GP: Al is going back to the ring. Inferno still in the locker room. Al has emerged from the back and is heading to the ring. Inferno is now out. Inferno is giving chase. He gets in the ring and starts fighting Al. He is just brawling with him and he i going into the ropes. Unrelenting into his gut. Al drops the cooler. Inferno punches Al right through the ropes. Al goes crashing to the floor.
JT: Who has him no, Roxx?
Roxx: You have a bad attitude, kid.
GP: Now Inferno goes to the outside, still pummeling Al. He whips him into the guardrail again, and gives him a big foot as he goes into the front row. Inferno brings Al up, and gives him jawbreaker over the guardrail. Al's jaw is in pain.
JT: Yeah, no more drinking the Jack Daniel's for him.
Roxx: Damn, and I wanted to share one with him later.
GP: Inferno goes to the gasoline, but no beer bottles. He goes under the ring and gets a table. He sets it up in the ring, he brings the gasoline and lighter with him. Wait a minute, he is pouring the gasoline on the table.
JT: YES! FIRE, FIRE!
Roxx: Calm down, buddy.
GP: Wait, I think he is, INFERNO LIGHTS THE TABLE ON FIRE! He is going to get Al, but Al is already coming to the ring. He comes in, but Inferno already is punching him. He sets him up, He's gonna give him a Backdraft through the flaming table!
JT: YES! DO IT!
GP: He lifts him, but wait! Al slips out, Inferno turns, kick to the gut, MUD SLIDER THROUGH THE FLAMING TABLE! HERE COME OFFICIALS TO PUT OUT THE FIRE! AL GOES INTO THE COOLER! HE TAKES OUT A BEER BOTTLE! HE IS DRINKING OUT OF IT! HE TAKES THE GASOLINE AND SOAKS IT! HE LIGHTS IT ON FIRE! HE'S WAITING FOR INFERNO!
JT: NO! INFERNO, DON'T GET UP!
GP: INFERNO MAKING HIS WAY UP! AL HITS HIM WITH THE FLAMING BEER BOTTLE! THE MATCH IS OVER!
(Bell Rings and "Got The Life" by Korn plays as Al gets on the middle rope and starts celebrating with more beers from the cooler. The crowd cheers him on as he walks to the back.)
GP: Inferno needs some medical attention. We'll get him to the back and get ready for our next match.
Prime Time Soliders v. Titanic & Jason Nash
GP: Looks like we're ready for our next match at Heatstroke.
Roxx: Damn I like Pay-Per-Views.
JT: Me, too. I do miss my women, though.
Roxx: Your women? The "Horny One" has more women in one week than you have had in your life.
GP: Guys, guys, now, let's just call the match.
JT: Fine, what match is it anyway?
Ring Announcer: The following match is scheduled for one fall and has a twenty minute time limit.
("Blue Monday" by Orgy plays as Titanic and Jason Nash walk out.)
Ring Announcer: Coming to the ring at this time, at a total combined weight of 620 pounds, JASON NASH AND TITANIC!
JT: Look at these guys! Two seven footers, the Prime Time Soldiers stand no chance.
GP: The Prime Time Soldiers are pretty big, too.
Roxx: Not as big as the "Horny One", if you catch my drift, Greg.
GP: Actually, I don't.
Roxx: You don't go outside much, do ya'?
(After Jason and Titanic get settled in the ring, "Ambitionz Az A Ryda" by 2Pac plays as Tyler Johnson and Ruff Ryda walk out from the back to a good pop.)
Ring Announcer: And coming to the ring at this time, at a combined weight of 536 pounds, Ruff Ryda and Tyler Johnson, the Prime Time Soldiers!
GP: See, look at these guys, seven footers galore in that ring.
JT: Geez, how many big guys can we have in one organization?
Roxx: I'm looking for the Prime Time Soldiers to take it, I don't know why.
JT: What are you talking about? Titanic and Nash are bigger and more experienced, these guys don't stand a chance.
GP: Look at this, they jut slide into the ring, and all of these huge men brawling! Ruff Ryda and Jason Nash, Titanic and Johnson! It is a brawl out there. Nash exchanging punches with Ruff Ryda. Titanic on the advantage of Johnson. He runs him to the ropes, and gets him with a sidewalk slam! Now he is helping Nash. They run Ryda to the ropes, and a double back body drop! It was like an earthquake in there! Titanic pulls up Ryda, and he bodyslams him. Wait! Johnson clotheslines Titanic from behind! He picks him up and throws him to the outside.
Roxx: Yep, that's my team, baby.
JT: Hey, Ryda is still down.
GP: Looks like we have created the legal men, Nash and Ryda. Nash picks up Ryda and throws him to the ropes and hits him with the big foot. He picks him up by the throat, a chokeslam! Ryda is out cold. Nash goe u to the top rope! Wait! He jumps outside of the ring and hits Johnson with a double axehandle. He and Titanic whip him into the guardrail, and Titanic tries to clothesline him over, but he doesn't go! Now Nash, he still doesn't, now both of them! He goes right into the front row. Titanic following him into the crowd, and Nash going back into the ring.
JT: See, the good guys always on the advantage.
Roxx: Shut your trap, boy.
GP: Nash in the ring now, but Ryda punches him in the gut, again, and again! With force! He is just whailing away at Jason Nash, and he lifts him, and bodyslams him. Nash up again, and he get a hiptoss! And he gets up again, and gets another! Ryda picks him up, and bodyslams him. He goes to the top rope. Nash getting up, and Ryda leaps off! A Clothesline off the top!
JT: Hey, look at Titanic in the crowd!
GP: Oh my! Titanic is in the fifteenth row with Johnson, and he just suplexed him over into the chairs! Titanic is arguig with a couple fans. He picks up Johnson and starts brawling back to the ring, Titanic on the advantage. He tries to run Johnson's head into the guardrail, but Johnson stops and runs Titanic's head in, and throws him into the ringside area.
JT: Look at that, Johnson gets lucky.
Roxx: Nope, Johnson is skilled. Speaking of getting lucky, where i that Meygon chick...
GP: Sorry, just filling in, there.
GP: Now Johnson stepping over the guardrail, but Titanic up to stop him, and he clotheslines him over to his side, Johnson land on his head! He's out cold! Now Titanic picks him up, and runs him into the ringpost! Titanic finnally goes to his corner.
JT: They play fair, unlike them Soldier punks.
Roxx: Put a damn sock in it, boy.
GP: Nash is now being dominated by Ryda in the ring. Ryda pushes him to the corner and he goes to the middle rope. He punches him in the head! 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, wait! He's in the wrong corner, Titanic just chokeslammed him off of the middle rope! Nash tags in Titanic, and Titanic goes to cover, 1, 2, 3NO! He barely got out. Titanic picks him up again, and he runs him to the rope, a chop to the chest! And another! And another, and a European Uppercut, followed by a clothesline, and a cover, 1, 2, no, out again. Titanic picks him up, CHOKESLAM! And a cover, 1, 2, 3NO! Johnson in to make the save. Nash tries to come in but the ref stops him. Johnson picks up Titanic and throws him to the ropes, a big foot! And he goes back. Both men are down. And the ref administers a ten count, but Nash Titanic gets up, and so does Ryda. Titanic goes for a clothesline, but Ryda ducks and hits a neck-breaker!
Roxx: Who has skills now, JT?
JT: Ahh, shove it.
Roxx: What you say, boy?
GP: Guys, we don't want violence here.
Roxx: Then tell cake boy here to shut up.
JT: Cake boy?
Roxx: Yeah, cake...
GP: SHUT UP!
Roxx & JT: Sorry...
GP: Thank you. Now Ruff Ryda has Titanic in the corner, and he throws him to the opposite corner, and a clothesline, he throws him to the other, and another! And he throws him to the ropes, and a big foot! He tags in Johnson. Johnson get in and picks up Titanic and hits a sidewalk slam, and Ryda with a leg drop! Great tag work here by the Prime Time Soldiers.
Roxx: What do you have to say now, JT?
GP: Johnson now has Titanic up and runs him to the ropes and Belly-to-bellies him. He picks him up, and another belly-to-belly, and he picks him up again, and runs him to the turnbuckle, he runs in, but he gets a clothesline from Jason Nash, he was in the wrong corner. Titanic tags in Jason, and in he comes. He goes on top of Johnson and starts hammering away. He picks him up, and a standing clothesline, and he springs him back up and clotheslines him again. He has Johnson at his mercy. He picks up Johnson and runs him to the ropes, a big foot! And he picks him up, CHOKESLAM! AND A COVER! 1, 2, 3NO! He barely gets out!
Roxx: Still got the power.
JT: Yeah, but Jason is about to give him the Jackknife.
GP: You bet, because he is signaling for it. He picks him up and sets him up, and he lifts him! YES! HE LANDS IT! THE JACKKNIFE ONTO JOHNSON! AND A COVER! 1, 2, 3NO! Ryda comes in to break the count! But Jason is up to battle with him. Titanic in now, he picks up Johnson, ICEBERG! THE ICEBERG AND HE COVERS! But he isn't the legal man! He is quite pissed off. He goes and starts fighting off Ruff Ryda. Jason Nash and him both fighting him. Titanic and him both go over the ropes. Now Jason Nash alone with the laid out Johnson. He goes to him, he just kicks him, and he covers, 1, 2, 3NO! HE KICKED OUT! AMAZING!
JT: No it isn't, he had a huge amount of time. You could have kicked out of three Jackknifes with that much time.
Roxx: Quit your bitching, man, just because it isn't your team.
GP: Jason picks up Johnson and throws him to the ropes, and he puts on a sleeper! But the ref is still trying to seperate Titanic and Ryda. They both have chairs! They are dueling! Steel against steel. But Ryda with a kick to the gut, and a chair shot! He goes in the ring, and he kicks down Jason to one knee, and he picks him up, and gives him a gutwrench suplex, and he picks him up for another. He wakes up Johnson, and they do a double back suplex, and a cover, 1, 2, no! Jason kick out. Now they both run to the ropes, double legdrop! 1, 2, no! Jason out again. They go to the ropes, double elbowdrop! 1, 2, no! He kicks out again!
JT: Pure strength, eh, Teddy?
Roxx: Want me to shut you up?
GP: Now both teams going to their respective corners. Ruff Ryda and Jason Nash the legal men. Ruff Ryda picks u Nash and uts him between the legs. This is going to be a powerbomb, wait, no it isn't! A Back body drop by Nash and he runs to the ropes for a quick elbo drop. He picks up Ruff Ryda, and is gonna suplex... NO! Small package, 1, 2, wait, Jason Nash reverses the Small Package, 1, 2, no! A kickout. Jason Nash up quickly, and sets him up for the Jackknife! No, reversed by Ruff Ryda into a sunset flip, but Jason rolls over, and hooks in a Boston Crab!
JT: Look at that wuss! He's gonna give up!
Roxx: No he ain't, that man will never give up.
GP: Wait, in come Johnson, and he bulldogs Jason Nash! In comes Titanic! We have all four men in a brawl here! Wait, Jason Nash rolls to the outside of the ring, and he grabs a chair! He throws it to Titanic and he distracts the ref. Titanic with the chair.
JT: WHAT A SHOT!
Roxx: They heard that in Florida.
GP: What chair shots to the Prime Time Soldiers! Jason Nash in the ring. He and Titanic pick up Johnson, DOUBLE CHOKESLAM! IT'S OVER! WAIT! HE'S NOT THE LEGAL MAN! Now the pick up Ruff Ryda, but he sinks down, DOUBLE LOW BLOW! ALL FOUR MEN ARE DOWN NOW!
JT: C'mon Jason! Get up!
Roxx: Ahh, quit it, you ain't helping.
GP: Ruff Ryda up first. He picks up Nash and Titanic, DOUBLE DDT! And he runs to the ropes, DOUBLE ELBOW! And he covers Nash, 1, 2, 3NO! A kickout. Ruff Ryda takes Titanic, RUFF RYDA'S ROLE! STILL NOT THE LEGAL MAN! He picks up Nash, and he sets him up for it, but Nash elbows him away, and clotheslines him, and Johnson clips him from behind! Johnson picks up Nash, HELL'S FURY! HE PUTS RUFF RYDA ON TOP! 1, 2, 3NO! Titanic makes the save!
JT: Whew, the Prime Time Losers almost won.
GP: Titanic and Johnson are up, and they are brawling to the outside. Ruff Ryda is up, and I think he is gonna give the Ruff Ryda's Role to Nash. He picks him up, but Nash rolls to the outside. Ruff Ryda gives chase, but he runs right into a Titanic clothesline!
JT: HAHA! Gotcha!
Roxx: Hey, don't be so excited, you ain't fightin' in there.
GP: Titanic rolls him into the ring, and sets him up, ICEBERG! Now Johnson in the ring, and he starts wailing away at Titanic! They both clotheslined over the top rope. And in comes Nash, and he covers, 1, 2, 3NO! He kicked out. He just left him there. Now Nash picks up Ryda, and runs him to the ropes, he ducks a clothesline, and he sets him up, RUFF RYDA'S ROLE! 1, 2, 3! IT'S OVER! PRIME TIME SOLDIERS DID IT!
("Ambitionz Az A Ryda" by 2Pac play as Titanic and Nash walk out to the back, as PTS continue to celebrate.)
Roxx: I told you, boy, you will never win.
JT: Shut up.
Roxx: You wanna make something of it?
GP: Why do we always argue.
JT: Sorry, Greg, but I don't like Teddy.
Roxx: I don't think he meant that.
GP: Let's just get ready for the next match.
Psycho Jay v. Ashton Cain
GP:This is perhaps one of the most violent rivalries we have seen in quite some time. Infact this one goes the whole way back to a wrestleing organization called the AWF. At this time Jay was the #1 man in the fed he was the world champion... after the Royal Rumble Cain earned a shot at Jay. As for the actual match we have no confirmation on what happened... Jay claims to have beaten Cain, and Cain claims to have beaten Jay... so their is really no way to tell.
Roxx:Isn't it obvious? Look at Jay he is a great compeatator... he would whipe the floor with Cain!
GP:I tend to disagree... I asked to former AWF superstars Dane Wilt and Phelen Kell's younger brother Vlad Kell about it and both gave similar reports of Dan Taylor president of the fed fireing Cain before the match could take place. And that Cain was back in the IWO locker room during the time the supposed match took place.
JT:WHATEVER! JAY IS GONNA BE HUGE IN THE IWO IN A MONTH! ALL HE HAS TO DO IS TAKE OUT CAIN! AND I FOR ONE SAY IT'LL HAPPEN!
Roxx:Yeppers... Cain is gonna get his clocked clean!
GP:Let's take a look at the resent brutal attack that Ashton did to Jay!
GP: WAIT! OH MY GOD! ASHTON CAIN IS HERE! ASHTON CAIN IS HERE! HE'S COMING INTO THE RING! HE'S AFTER DANE... .NO? NO! HE'S AFTER PSYCHO JAY! DANE IS STUNNED! HE'S IN TEH CORNER STUNNED! CAIN IS LAYING INTO JAY WITH A CHAIR! HE IS LAYING INTO JAY WITH A CHAIR! He smashed Jay across the face with it! The chair is broken! There is blood all over the mat! Oh my god! My god! Ashton is continuing the beating! He is jamming his fingers into Psycho Jays eyes. Dane Wilt is leaving the ring as quick as he can! Phelen Kell has a smile on his face! He knew this was gonna happen! Are they in cahoots?
Angel: Is the original Hostile Youth back together?
JT: Whats going on?
GP: Ashton Cain continues to maul Psycho Jays face ripping away at the open wounds! Jays face is covered in blood! Nothing but blood! What the hell is going on? Ashton Cain is decimating Psycho Jay! He lays Jay on top of the chair by the neck... .SHOOTING STAR PRESS ONTO JAY! HIS NECK FLAYLED THERE! OH MY GOD STOP CAIN! STOP CAIN! PHELEN KELL IS SMILING! HE IS HOPPING THE FENCE AND IS GOING INTO THE RING! HE IS CALM AND COOL!
JT: Oh no! Don't let the do gooder Kell and Cain duo make a come back!
Angel: I thought Dane Wilt and Phelen Kell were a team?
JT: They are!
Angel: Oh... .well then whats going on?
GP: Phelen Kell is standing in a far corner as Ashton Cain continues to pound on Psycho Jay! This is brutal! Just brutal! Ashton Cain doesn't even know Kells in the ring!
GP:That is destrubeing to say the least!
JT:That's 3 against one! That's not fair to Jay! Jay is only one man! See Ashton knows he couldn't take Jay out alone so he has HY2 watching his back! See look at Cain the HY reject... trying to get back with them.
Roxx:Yeah really! Cain doesn't know the meaning of a fair fight!
GP:Well it's obvious you two are picking Jay for the win... I think Cain is gonna get his vengence here.
Ring Announcer:Ladies and gentlemen the following match up is a falls count anywhere extreme style match up! It is set for one fall... introduceing first... he hails from Philly Pa..accompanied to the ring by Jay Taylor... he weighs in at 323 lbs... .he is the master of the Super Bomb... here is Psycho Jay!
::"Trust?" by Limp Bizkit begins to play as Psycho Jay walks out still with the dried up blood and paint on his face from Hostile Takeover. He enters the ring to the boos of the crowd. The camera cuts to the back where Ashton Cain is walking towards the ring entrance. He is wearing one of the original HY T-shirts and a pair of jeans. Suddenly Harlequin pops out infront of him.::
Harlequin:Cain... I have seen you grow up from the snot nosed little punk you once were to the man you are today. It would be my honor to lead you to the ring.
Ashton:Even though you turned on me like the other two... you still did alot for me during my life... it would be my honor to have you in my cornor.
::back to ringside::
Ring Announcer:And his opponent... he weighs in at 285 lbs. He is from Chicago and is the largest man to ever execute a shooting star press. With his FORMER manager Harlequin... here is Ashton Cain!
::"Nice Guys Finish Last" by Greenday begins to play as Cain runs down to the ring and HArlequin chases after. Cain slides under the ring and Jay rolls out the other side of the ring.::
GP:Jay got the hell outta Dodge!
Roxx:So your JR now?
GP:Listen to this crowd going nuts for Cain! They love this guy!
JT:No they don't they are cheering him on because they know they're never gonna have to see him again!
Roxx:Whatever Bobby Heanen!
GP:If I am JR and he's the Weasel... then who's that make you?
Roxx:No one I am Teddy "Ribbed for her pleasure" Roxx! A 100% original character!
GP:The match is underway now... Cain rolls to the outside... and Jay meets him... look at these two huge monsters exchange blows to one another... finally Cain is knocking Jay back... Cain grabs Jay and whips him into the security rail.
Roxx:Listen to these idiots chant f***ing hostile... the old chant of the orignial Hostile Youth! What a bunch of dreamers!
GP:That's music to Cain's ears! Cain has a steel chair and charges at Jay... but Jay moves out of the way at the last second and Cain bent the chair in half on the security rail. Cain now locks up with Jay... and Cain over powers Jay again and whips him face first into the steel pole... that might have busted Jay's nose! All I know is Jay is already bleeding.
JT:Jay sure is a bleeder.
Roxx:Excellent I wanna see some good splatter action.
GP:I thought you two were routeing for Jay?
JT:I never said that... I said I thought he would win... I am routeing to see BLOOD AND GUTS!
Roxx:Yes that is always cool.
GP:Well Cain just rolled Jay in the ring and Cain followed. Jay is up and Cain drops him again with a running clothesline. Now Cain is stomping the hell outta Jay while Jay is down!
Roxx:Cheap shots! Look at that! CHESSER!
GP:Cain has Jay up and whips him into the ropes... backbody drop! Cain has Jay back up and drops him with a swinging neck breaker! Jay is really hurting in the early goings of this match.
JT:Cain has Jay up again and scoops him up and power slams him back down. Cain is going to the second rope... and a elbow drop off the 2nd rope into Jays chest!
GP:Cain has Jay up again and whips him into the ropes... .Jay ducks a clothesline... .on the way back leap frogs Cain... and one more time Jay nails cain with a DDT! Jay is now just sitting their regaining his strenght... he really laid Cain out with that DDT.
JT:Laid him out? You kidding after that I think Jay has this match won.
GP:I don't dobut that a damn bit! Now Jay has Cain up and tosses him in the cornors... and is just slapping Cain in the face... this is really not the smartest thing to do. Jay whips Cain into the other side... and a big splash takes Cain down!
JT:That shook the ring!
GP: Jay nails Cain with a snap mare takeover. Jay goes up top... and crossbody on Cain for the cover...
JT:1 2 3! He won it!
GP:No way JT! That was barely a two count!
JT:SLOW COUNT, SLOW COUNT!
GP:Jay just picked Cain up and knocks him back down with a pile driver. Jay now has Cain up again and just tossed him on the outtside. Jay rolls out now too and reaches under the ring... and it's a table! Jay sets the table up now. Jay scoops Cain up and is gently laying him on the table... .he is now climbing to the top rope and HOLY S*** JAY JUST NAILED CAIN THROUGH THE TABLE WITH THE ALABAMA JAMMER LEG DROP OFF THE TOP! THE COVER... 1... ..2... .NO! CAIN KICKED OUT FROM THAT!
JT:WOW! An I have a feeling the best in this match is yet to come. Jay has Cain back up and just tossed him over the security rail into the crowd! Jay is up on the security railing and drops a double axe handle onto Cain's back!
GP:Now Jay has a fans chair and just dropped Cain with one shot to the head with it. Jay just picked Cain up and throws him up on his shoulders... .POWER SLAM THGOUGH TWO STEEL CHAIRS! THE COVER... 1... .2... NO! Cain got a shoulder up! Jay has Cain up and is dragging him by his hair through the rest of the crowd... .they are now up to the stairs to the balcony section.
Roxx:You mean the nose bleed section for all the poor f***ing IWO fans. Well anyways Jay is punching Cain and Cain is stumbleing up the stairs... .Jay just grabbed a cup of beer and threw it on Cain... .and another one... and another one! Cain is gonna be smelling like a poet on pay day!
JT:Jay grabs Cain and pushed him into the fans behind him... now they are fighting in the narrow rows... .Jay just clotheslined Cain to the ground and is now simply trying to rip the eyes from Cain's socket... .effective little move!
GP:Jay has Cain up and just tossed him over his head to the people in the row behind them! Now JAy has Cain up and Jay and Cain are tradeing punches... but Jay has taken less of a beating then Cain and Jay drops down Cain. They are back in the aisle... and Jay just scoop slamed Cain onto the steps... now Jay is climbing the rest of the steps and is at the top now... Jay is now chargeing down with a head of steam...
Roxx:AND HOLY SH!T... CAIN JUST FLIPPED JAY OVER HIM AND JAY FELL AND ROLLED DOWN TO THE VERY BOTTOM OF THE STAIRS! JAY CAN'T BE ALIVE AFTER THAT! I MEAN... HOLY SH!T... WOW!
GP:Cain is now slowly walking down the stairs to where Jay's limp body lays. Cain is their and has Jay up... .Jay's one arm is just hanging their... it's gotta be broken! It's just dangleing that poped it out of the socket for sure!
Roxx:Cain now walks over to a near by table and just picks up the phone lieing on it and whips it at Jay... it just bounced off his head... now Cain has the lap top laying on it... this must've been somebody from the stage crews... and he just smacked Jay in the head with that... Jay is down and I think out!
JT:Cain now has the can of Dr. Pepper and is chugging it down and just threw about half of that at Jay too! Cain just picked Jay up and is laying him on top of the table... Cain is going up to the balacony about 10 feet above... and MOON SAULT FROM THE BALCONY BUT JAY MOVED AND CAIN WENT THROUGH THE TABLE TO THE COLD HARD CEMENT! BOTH MEN ARE DOWN! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
GP:WOW! Well the ref isn't starting a count he is just waiting for someone to get back up.
Roxx:Both these men are dead just quit the match and let's get those corpses out of here... .it was great for awhile but nothing more can be seen here.
GP:I don't think it's over yet... Cain hates Jay... Jay hates Cain... I think the only way this match would end would be if one of them would pin the other... this match has been to built up for either of them to let it end like this!
JT:C'mon man... look at them they are dead!
GP:I agree they're not moveing... but I can see Jay breatheing... I am sure Cain has some broken ribs after that one.
Roxx:Listen to the crowd Parker..they won't the ref to just throw the match out... they are getting tired of this wait.
GP:Who knows what will..OH MY! Jay is moveing! Jay is moveing! He is up on his knees and he grabs his broken arm... and he just poped it back in the joint! Now Cain is actually starting to move! Cain is squirming on the ground... .both men are fighting to get to their feet... Jay is on his knees... Cain is up on one knee... and JAY IS UP! Jay is up, but is stumbleing. Cain gets up... and they are tradeing punches again! Jay just slamed Cain up against the wall and... Jay just pushed him through one of the access door! They are now in the back slaming off doors... Jay grabs Cain and drops him with a belly to belly on the marble floor. Jay has Cain up and just threw Cain into the womens bathroom,
JT:AHAHA! Look at all those women run out... hey wasn't that Nikki running out?
GP:Jay has Cain and just nailed a spine buster on the tile floor! Now Jay is stomping Cain... and has him up and just threw him face first into a mirror! CAIN'S FACE IS COVERED IN BLOOD! IT'S DRIPPING ALL OVER THE PLACE! JAY HAS CAIN NOW... AND POWER BOMB HEAD FIRST RIGHT ON ONE OF THE URINEALS! JAY FOR THE COVER... 1... .2... .3NO! CAIN SOMEHOW KICKED OUT!
Roxx:How the f*** is that jabroni still not out! Jay is just stood up with his hands on his hips... he has no idea what else to do! WHAT A SEC! WHO'S THAT WOMEN BEHIND HIM?!?
JT:I DON'T KNOW BUT SHE JUST WALKED RIGHT INTO THE BATHROOM IN JUST A BRA AND PANTIES!!!
GP:YOU IDIOTS THAT'S ALEXIS CAIN! I AM SURE OF IT... BUT WHAT'S SHE DOING HERE? SHE'S WALKING UP BEHIND JAY AND IS RUBBING HIS SHOULDER... JAY TURNS AROUND AND SHE JUST PUT HER ARM AROUND HIM...
JAY:I knew you wanted me!
Alexis:You know what Jay baby... .that whore you hired to suck your d!ck that you claimed was me back in the AWF... DIDN'T LOOK A GOD D@MN THING LIKE ME!
GP:OH MY GOSH! CATTLE PROD TO THE BALLS BY ALEXIS! JAY GOES DOWN HARD AND FAST!!! I DON'T BELIVE THAT!
Alexis:In your dreams you fat f***... Ash make quick work of him... I feel like Debrah walking around in my underwear!
GP:Both men are down, both are awake... .Cain's covered in blood from his face, nose, neck, and the back of his head... and Jay... well his boys are fried! Cain is up but is just stumbleing around... Jay is struggleing to breath after that one!
JT:AHAHAHA! ALEXIS CAIN IS A DOMINATRIX!
Roxx:Can you tell?
JT:I CAN TELL!
GP:Cain has Jay up and they are fighting out of the bathroom now... they are tradeing punches out in the hall again... Cain just laid Jay out with a short arm clothesline... and what do you know... they're is a table behind them!
JT:Man this trick gets old!
Roxx:Yeah we are becomeing ECW.
JT:Really? ECW! ECW! ECW! ECW! ECW!
GP:SHUTUP JT! Cain is pulling the table out in the middle of the hall and Cain just set Jay on the table... and Cain just walked to the janitors closet and pulled out... a sledge hammer?
JT:Do they have them in their?
Roxx:Obviously I guess.
GP:Cain charges Jay with the sledge hammer... Jay rolled out of the way and Cain smashed that table in two with one swipe!
JT:WOW! Now Cain is chaseing after Jay trying to smash his head no Jay rolled again! Cain just dropped the sledge and is on top of Jay now punching him repeatedly in the head!
GP:Now Cain picks Jay up and threw him through the curtains and they are heading back down to the ring again. Cain has Jay by the hair and just tossed him in the ring.
JT:Wow a nice big circle... GREAT!
GP:Now Cain is stomping on Jay... Cain has Jay up and is nailing him with those knifed edge chops right in the bread basket. Cain has Jay in the ropes now and whips him into the other side... and knocks Jay down with a drop toe hold! Now Cain is going up top...
JT:He is waiting for a battered and bloodied Jay to get up...
Roxx:Jay's up... Cain's going for the Hurricaranna... but Jay counters with a power bomb! The quick cover... 1... .2... 3!
GP:NO! Cain got his shoulder up!
JT:No he didn't!
GP:Then why isn't the ref calling for the bell?
JT:Because he is blind as h***!
GP:Jay is picking Cain back up... and drops him down again with a Russian Leg Sweep! Jay is circleing Cain now and picked him back up..DOUBLE HANDED CHOKE SLAM! Jay is calling for it... he says that's it! He has Cain in the cornor... JAy is up top... and SUPER BOMB! SUPER BOMB(top rope power bomb)! No one kicks out from that!
JT:1... ... 2... ... ..WHAT!
Roxx:He's not f#cking human!
GP:Cain Kicked out! Cain kicked out! No one has ever done that! Jay is grabbing the ref and is yelling at him! Jay Taylor is in the ring and turns the ref towards him... Jay is screaming at the ref... and Jay Taylor just socked the ref! That's gonna be a huge fine! But, the match still will go on. Jay Taylor is telling Psycho Jay to nail him with the Super Bomb again... wait a sec... Harlequin is in the ring and he just shoved Jay Taylor! Taylor is swearing his head off at the demented clown. I wouldn't mess with Harlequin he is a tuff guy from the streets of Chicago!
JT:Taylor just socked Harlequin... now Jay Taylor off the ropes coming at Harlequin with a clothesline... NO!
GP:Yes! Harlequin just Face Lifted Jay Taylor! Taylor is out! Harlequin must've been watching Dane do that Face Lift (super kick) for sometime now and tonight Harlequin just laid out Jay Taylor with it!
JT:Yeah, but Psycho Jay is p!ssed! Jay drops Cain and just walked over and grabbed Halrequin... RUNNING POWER BOMB OUT OF THE RING! HARLEQUIN IS OUT! AHAHAHA!
GP:Well a new ref just came running down to ringside and Jay is yelling at him for takeing so long... Jay turns around... CAIN GRABS HIM DVD! DEATH VALLEY DRIVER! ASHTON CAIN IS CALLING FOR IT!!!!!
GP:Yes Cain is going up top for his famous shooting star press! Jay is out... Cain off the top SHOOTING STAR PRESS! NO! JAY MOVED! CAIN MISSED THE SHOOTING STAR PRESS!
JT:AHAHAHA! TOLD YOU JAY HAD THIS ONE!
GP:Both men are out... Jay Taylor is still laying knocked out in the center of the ring. The ring crew is pulling Jay Taylor's limp body out of the ring. Now Psycho Jay is up and has Cain... Jah flips Cain upside down and tomb stone pile driver! Jay isn't even going for a cover... he is just takeing a break.
JT:Taylor has Cain up again and just whipped him into the ropes... running clothesline by Jay! Jay has Cain up right away... and reverse ddt! The cover..1... 2... NO! Cain yet again somehow kicked out! How is this jobber doing it!
GP:Psycho Jay has no idea what to do next!
JT:Wait... Jay just went outside and got a steel chair... he is setting it up and is laying Cain's leg on it... Jay goes up top... PSYCHO JAY IS CALLING FOR A LEG DROP...
GP:YES HE FLEW LEG DROP... BUT CAIN MOVED! CAIN MOVED AND JAY'S BIG REVENGE JUST BLEW UP IN HIS FACE! CAIN MOVED!
JT:Neither man is moveing...
Roxx:I can hear Jay screaming... that must've really took it out of him!
GP:Cain is up... and so is Jay... Jay swing but misses and does a complete 360... and Cain just nailed Jay with a spinning heel kick! Jay goes flying back in the cornor and slides down..he is no sitting on the floor proped against the cornor. Cain is now takeing the busted steel chair and is laying it spread across Jay's legs sticking up to Jay's face... Cain is in the other cornor and...
GP:ASHTON CAIN WITH A BRONCO BUSTER ON THE CHAIR AND ON TO JAY! BRONCO BUSTER I DON'T BELIVE IT! NOW CAIN IS PULLING JAY OUT OF THE CORNOR... AND HAS HIM IN POSITION... AND YES HE'S CALLING FOR THE SHOOTING STAR PRESS AGAIN!
Roxx:WATCH HIM F#CK IT UP AGAIN!
GP:CAIN UP TOP...
JT:HE'LL CHOKE NO WAY CAN CAIN WIN.
GP:SHOOTING STAR PRESS ONTO JAY!
GP:REF FOR THE COUNT... 1... .2... 3! CAIN JUST BEAT PSYCHO JAY! MY GOD WHAT A MATCH!
JT:I FOR ONE CAN'T BELIVE IT! I THOUGHT CAIN RAN AWAY FROM THE IWO BECAUSE HE WAS SCARED OF JAY!
Roxx:IT WAS LUCK! CAIN GOT LUCKEY! NEXT TIME THOSE TWO MEET JAY IS GONNA WHIPE THE FLOOR WITH HIM!
GP:LISTEN TO THOSE CHEERS!
JT:Look at Jay... Cain took it out of him this match... he must've had his number!
GP:Wow... well fans... we have some medics helping Jay out of the ring... I am sure he'll be fine in some time... they are trying to help Ashton but he just keeps pushing them away. Cain is calling for the mic... .
Ashton:Whoa! Look guys I apperciate that your trying to see if I am alright after that... but give me a few minutes... this is may very well be my last time ever in an IWO arena... so please just give me some time with the fans.
GP:The medics just kida shrugged and walked off... Harlequin is back up and is standing in the ring beside Ashton...
Ashton:Wow. This is it... that big hoorah for me. First off I wanna thank all the fans... that stuck through me through thick and thin. The ones who were with me when I was one half of the best tag team in the history of the IWO to when I was the world champ of the IWO. That's the type of fan I like to have. I would also like to thank Jamie, John, and the all the rest of the board members. Without great guys like them the IWO wouldn't be what it is. And well just thanks to everyone for all their support...
::Ashton is interupted by "F*cking Hostile" by Pantera as Phelen Kell walks out. Kell is wearing an original HY shirt just like Cain has one and long baggy black jeans. The crowd begins to chant "Hostile Youth" as the two stand in the ring.::
Phelen:If you thought you were leaveing before you say bye to me... your damn wrong!
Ashton:Kell what can I say about you man. You've been like a brother to me... you did break my heart back a few months ago by destroying our dynasty... but I am willing to forgive and forget just like the next guy. I will miss your ugly mug most of all.
Kell:My thoughts exactley... I won't defend what I did... but I will say your career sky rocketed after that!
::Suddenly they are interupted by "Future Breed Machine:HY edit" by Meshuggah as Dane Wilt walks out. Dane has on a letter jacket like football players wear in high school with a VC logo on the sleeves and on one of the breast pockets and also has on a baggy pair of black jeans. The crowd goes nuts now that 3 of the biggest faces ever are all in the ring with mics.::
Dane:Hey now I feel left out I am HY also you know... why wasn't in invited to this little party?
Phelen:Hey your right your HY also man your the current HY with me... Cain and me are the past HY the legendary HY. Cain may leave... but it doesn't matter he still is one of us and always will be. Because once your Hostile Youth... your always Hostile Youth!
::The camera zooms them all as they leave the ring and slap hands with the fans on their way out::
GP:Wow what an exit!
JT:What a match!
Roxx:What a d!ck.
GP: Cain ends his IWO career on a good note... let's get to the next match!
Extreme Title #1 Contender Match
Da Bronx Bro v. Chrome Thunder
Roxx: And here we go.. with all the great matches on this HeatStroke card.. one of these two men will focus on the Extreme Title Match, because the winner of this match will become the #1 Contender to that prestigious title. Da Bronx Bro vs. Chrome Thunder. Let's go up to Busta Hymen...
Busta Hymen: Yo, yo, yo! This contest is scheduled for one fall, and it is for the #1 Contendership for the Extreme Title! First... .. From the Bronx, in New York, he is the master of the BronxPlex, he is... DA BRONX BRO!!!!!!
Busta Hymen: And his opponent... . he fought in an Extreme Title Cheescake Moat Match on Hostile Takeover... . HE IS CHROME THUNDER!!
GP: Da Bro just waffled Thunder with that trash can! Bro now delivering several more shots with the can, and now he lays it on the ground, piledriver! This one may be over early, 1, 2, and a kickout by Thunder! Thunder up, throwing lefts and rights at Bro, Da Bronx Bro is stunned, swinging neckbreaker! Chrome Thunder now going under the ring, and he's just found a whole mother lode of weapons! He has a table and two chairs out, he's reaching for a kendo stick.. Bro slides outside, T-Bone Suplex! Bro tosses that kendo stick, the table, the chairs, and apparently a barbed wire bat he found, all of them are in the ring!
JT; THIS IS THE BEST PPV EVER TEDDY!!!! THERE'S GONNA BE LOTS OF BLOOD, AND WE CAN'T GET SLAPPED!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!
Roxx: Damn straight JT! Bro has that kendo stick, Thunder gets in the ring, he's a little groggy from the T-Bone.. he stumbles, And Bro nails him right in the head with the stick! Bro wearing Thunder out! He swings again, X Block, Thunder trips Da Bronx Bro, elbowdrop! Thunder grabs a chair, he goes up top as Bro staggers up, TOP ROPE CHAIRSHOT!! WHAT A SHOT!! Thunder covers, 1, 2, kickout!
JT: Thunder now with Da Bronx Bro, he has a barbed wire ball bat, and he whacks it into Bro's back! Finally some blood in this one! Thunder shoots Bro in, Bro ducks a clothesline, but not the spinning heel kick! Thunder puts Bro up top, tries a suplex, Da Bro blocks, he blocks again, punch to the gut. Bro lifts up Thunder, BronxPlex! Top Rope JackHammer! That may be all! 1, 2, and a kickout! Bro is shocked! He sets up the table! He calls for another BronxPlex! Thunder's put up top, but he snatches Bro in a facelock, Tornado DDT through the Table!!!
GP: Da Bronx Bro stunned, but he gets back up, kick, Stunner! Da Bro knocks Thunder back down with a clothesline, he picks him up, suplexes him down! Back up, but Thunder surprises him and hits a Fisherman's suplex! Into a bridge! 1, 2, Da Bro bridges out, and catches him with a German Suplex, Bridge... 1,2, kickout! Thunder snatches him up, Dragon Suplex! It's also bridged! 1, 2, kickout! Bro locks him up, Bridging TazMission Plex! 1, 2, kickout! Bro now being placed up top, NORTHERN LIGHTS SUPERPLEX!! SOMEHOW THUNDER HELD THE BRIDGE ON IMPACT! 1, 2, Kickout! AND WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!!!!
Roxx: I LOVE IT!!! Some idiot's lowering a Hell in a Cell around the ring! And its loaded down with weaponry! That thing has hit the ground, Bro with a double leg takedown, catapults Thunder into the cage! Thunder's busted wide open! He staggers back, hoists him up, atomic drop! Bro and Thunder are down, but they slowly crawl back up! Bro yanks down a kendo stick from the wall, Thunder grabs the other one, and they are dueling! Bro with a huge swing and a miss, Thunder gives him a shot in the knee, and he cracks it right over Bro's face! Thunder now ascending this Cell, he has grabbed the ceiling, Bro back up, Thunder lets go and Ranas Da Bronx Bro! The shoulders are down! 1, 2, Kickout again by Da Bronx Bro!
Thunder opening up a chair... he goes up top, Bro into the ropes, and Thunder crotches himself on the top rope! Da Bronx Bro up top, BRONXPLEX ONTO THAT OPENED CHAIR!!! THAT CHAIR IS NOW JUST MANGLED METAL!!! Da Bro covers, 1, 2, kickout somehow by Thunder!!
JT: Da Bro now has gotten hold of a pair of.. BOLT CUTTERS?! HE JUST WHACKED THUNDER RIGHT IN THE HEAD WITH THEM!!! THUNDER IS DOWN AND QUITE POSSIBLY OUT! Bro now cutting an escape from the cell! Bro now heads back inside that thing, and he picks up Chrome Thunder for a suplex, blocked, inside cradle... 1, 2, Kickout! Thunder is back up quickly, he grabs Da Bronx Bro, Cradle DDT!, Da Bronx Bro stirring, he gets up, setting Thunder up... Bronx Bomber! A running Ligerbomb! He'll try a cover AGAIN, 1, 2, and a kickout!
GP: Both of these guys have been put through hell, I just noticed a ladder on top of the cell, but Thunder has grabbed onto a broom from the ceiling, and cracks it over Da Bronx Bro's head! Thunder now doing the same with a nine iron! Chrome Thunder now grabs a chair, he;s up on top.. ARABIAN FACE BUSTER!!! Thunder hooks the leg deep, 1, 2, THRA-- NO! KICKOUT BY THE BRONX BRO! THUNDER THOUGHT HE HAD IT! AND THUNDER LOCKS THE TWISTER IN ON THE REFEREE!!! THE REFEREE IS SCREAMING IN PAIN! REFEREE IS UNCONSIOUS!!!! Northern Lights Suplex on Bro! Another ref is out, he crawls through the bolt cutter made hole, 1, 2, Kickout at 2 and 3/4!!
Roxx: Thunder is in absolute disbelief!!! And the Bro is back on his feet. Opening up with rights and lefts! He has a kendo stick! Right over Thunder's skull!! Da Bronx Bro up top, he leaps, and almost takes Chrome Dome's head off with a guilliotine legdrop!! Chrome Thunder somehow gets up, and he rams Da Bro's skull into the cage! Thunder now crawls out the opening, and Da Bronx Bro follows, and nails Thunder with a chairshot to the head! Cover, ref out of position... 1, 2, and damn near three! Da Bronx Bro is PISSED! BRONXPLEX ON THE REF OFF OF THE GUARDRAIL! A THIRD referee is on his way! These two psychopaths are fighting into the crowd!
JT: YES THEY ARE!!!! THEY'VE MADE IT UP TO A SCAFFOLD!!!! HOW I DON'T KNOW!!! THAT THING IS ABOUT 35 FEET IN THE AIR! They are fighting back and forth with right hands, Da Bronx Bro scoops up Chrome Thunder, Tombstone on the scaffold!!!!
GP: Da Bro gives a signal to the crowd... he's not.. he scoops up Chrome Thunder... Holy sh!t... holy sh!t... . HOLY MOTHER F*CKING SH!T!!!!! DA BRONX BRO JUST BRONXPLEXED CHROME THUNDER OFF OF THAT SCAFFOLD!! BOTH MEN WENT THROUGH THE TOP OF THAT HELL IN A CELL, AND STRUCK THE REFEREE ON THE WAY DOWN!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!
Roxx: Paramedics are filling this ring, EMTs, there are stretchers out here, a fourth referee has come out, Da Bronx Bro is laying motionless over Chrome Thunder. He tells the referee to count.. 1... ... ... 2... 3! It's over! Referee waving his hand! IT'S NOT OVER!!!! IN SOME UNEARTHLY WAY THUNDER KICKED OUT!!! Da Bronx Bro is pissed!!! He turns on the EMT's, he's got one, BronxPlex! All the others are escaping!
JT: The ladder that was on top of the cage now lays in the ring... . Da Bronx Bro stands it up, but is met with a side elbow by Thunder, scoop slam. He ascends the ladder... FROG SPLASH! Thunder off the ropes, legdrop! Off the other side, elbow drop! Back up the ladder... . SHOOTING STAR PRESS! He's smiling.. Thunder goes up again... MOONSAULT! Thunder makes the cover, 1, 2, kickout! Thunder's irate, he whacks him right in the head with a chair, cover, 1, 2, kickout! Thunder now picks his opponent up, Famasser on the chair! Cover, 1, 2, kickout again!
GP: Thunder has to be wondering what to do to put the Bro away., he runs, jumps, springboards off of a chair, hooks Da Bronx Bro with a hurricanrana! Chrome Thunder jumps up onto the top rope, he jumps, flying elbow onto the Bronx Bro! Da Bronx Bro has got to be out of it now.. Chrome Thunder jumps on Da Bronx Bro for the cover, 1, 2, kickout again! Thunder cannot believe Da Bronx Bro escaped that! He stomps away, and he sets up, Axe Kick... ..
Roxx: Da Bron Bro caught the foot, and trips up Chrome Thunder! Bro pounces on Thunder with a kneedrop! Bro scoops him up, shoots him in, ducks a Thunder clothesline, back body drop onto a chair! Da Bronx Bro grabs Thunder in a front facelock, Implant DDT! Thunder's cranium bounced off of the mat! Da Bronx Bro not going for a cover, he goes up top, Cross Body Block, THUNDER CATCHES HIM AND HITS A POWERSLAM!!! THAT WILL BE ALL! 1, 2, NO IT'S NOT!! DA BRO KICKED OUT! Thunder has given all he's got, but he has not been able to put Da Bronx Bro away!
JT: Da Bro stumbles to his feet, he kicks at Thunder, who catches the foot, Enziguri by Da Bronx Bro! He now clamps a sleeperhold on Thunder! Great strategy, because both of these guys are pretty much dead... but Thunder with the jawbreaker to counter! Thunder scooping Da Bronx Bro up onto his shoulders, Death Valley Driver! Thunder covers, 1, 2, Bro's foot on the ropes, 3!!!!!!!!!---- WAIT!! THE REFEREE SAW BRO'S FOOR ON THE ROPE AT 2 AND 9/10!!! Thunder is livid! He gives the referee an X-Factor! A FIFTH referee is out, I think that's some type of record!!!
GP: Da Bronx Bro and Chrome Thunder have just decided to slug it out! Lefts and rights to each other's skulls! Thunder with a drop toe hold, the first WRESTLING move all match, and he legdrops the back of Bro's neck. Thunder now picks up Bro, BrainBuster! Chrome Thunder smiling, an inverted atomic drop, probably to keep Bro down for a bigger move. He hoists Bro up onto the top turnbuckle, he follows, he tries a suplex, blocked, blocked again, DA BRONX BRO HAS HIM LIFTED!! BUT AS IT STANDS, IF HE SUPLEXES HIM BOTH GUYS ARE GOING INTO THE CAGE!!!!! WAIT A SECOND!! TWISTING BRONXPLEX BY DA BRONX BRO ONTO A FOLDED LADDER! NO!!! REVERSED INTO A FACESLAM ONTO THAT LADDER!!! CHROME THUNDER COVERS!! 1... .2... 3!!!! HE GOT HIM!!! CHROME THUNDER IS THE #1 CONTENDER!!
Roxx: F*cking lucky if I say so myself. DBB had him beat 1-2-3... we all saw it.
GP: Maybe... .but Chrome Thunder gets out with the win. Let's move on to the next match!
US Title #1 Contender Match
Blaze vs. David Thorne v. Dwight D. Nobody
Roxx: And here we go with our #1 Contendership for the United States Title Match. This is gonna be a Triple Threat between three up and coming superstars. Let's go up to Busta Hymen.
Busta Hymen: You all know what this match is, so les just bring out the participants! First, he is a member of the Bomb Squad, BLAZE!!!!
Busta Hymen: Next, David Thorne!
Busta Hymen: And lastly, from the AAA, the master of the Postal DeathLock, Dwight, D. Nobody!
*DING A DING A LING*
GP: And here we go. Blaze and Thorne lacing into each other with right hands Blaze with a European uppercut, another, and a third sends Thorne down. Blaze with a quick fistdrop, and now Thorne with a back heel trip, putting Blaze on his back, he grabs the leg, and applies a step over toehold. Thorne wrenching back deep, but breaks the hold pretty quick. Thorne shoots Blaze in, Blaze ducks a clothesline, dropkicks Thorne! Blaze clotheslines Thorne over the top! Thorne on his feet, baseball slide dropkick by Blaze!
JT: Dwight D. Nobody has decided to get into this contest... he grabs Blaze from behind, German Suplex! Nobody stomping away, and he drops an elbow! Nobody picks Blaze up, shoulderbreaker! Blaze is reeling in pain, Nobody bounces off the ropes, big splash! Blaze slowly to his feet, he dropkicks Nobody. No effect! He launches a kick at Nobody, who catches it, and Blaze with an Enziguri nearly takes Nobody's head off! Blaze covers, 1, 2, Kickout by Dwight! Thorne stirring on the outside, as Dwight grabs Blaze, and plants him with a powerbomb! Dwight hooks the leg, 1, 2, Thorne makes the save!
Roxx: Thorne now stomping away at Nobody, who didn't see the attack. Thorne with a high knee lift, Nobody stumbles back, Thorne charges, shouldertackles Nobody, and the momentum takes both men up and over the top! The referee starts the count, Nobody hotshots Thorne on the steel guardrail! Nobody whips him into the apron, Thorne goes down holding his back, referee up to a count of five, Nobody delivering some closed fists, referee up to nine... ..
GP: AND BLAZE JUMPS OVER THE TOP WITH A CORKSCREW PLANCHETTA NAILING BOTH MEN AND RESTARTING THE COUNT! Blaze pitches Thorne in, sets him up on top, INFERNO! Blaze hits the Inferno off of the top! Blaze hooks the leg, 1, 2, Nobody with a double sledge to the back of Blaze's head, stopping the pin! All three guys now just exchanging punches in the middle of the ring. Thorne drops Blaze, Nobody drops Thorne, Nobody picks both his opponents up, Double Noggin Knocker! They're stumbling around, Dwight D. Nobody is up top, both guys turn around, DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE OFF THE TOP ROPE! Nobody rolls Blaze to the other side of the ring, he covers Thorne, 1, 2, kickout!
JT: Nice strategy employed my Nobody, taking Blaze out, but Thorne still had too much left. Thorne to his feet, takes Nobody down, and he has his trademark Zion Kneebar locked on!! Nobody's going to tap, but Blaze just broke the Kneebar! He nails Thorne with a spinning heel kick to the head, and he has a figure four leglock now clamped on Dwight! Dwight screaming in pain, he's attempting to turn this move, he does so, and he grabs Blaze's arms, and pulls back, as he rolls up! He has some form of a leg grapevine surfboard applied.. whatever the case the ref checking with Blaze, as it is a submission hold, Blaze shakes his head no, and gets to the ropes. Nobody with a surprising clean break... .
Roxx: Nobody now walking over to Thorne, and takes him down with a Luthess Press! Right and left hands raining down on David Thorne! Nobody with a kick to the gut, piledriver! Thorne is down, Blaze over to Nobody, Stunner! Nobosy got Stunned by Blaze, Blaze picks up Nobody, Mitchinoku Driver! Blaze up top... Shooting Star Press-- BUT NOBODY GOT HIS KNEES UP IN TIME! Blaze on the ground writhing in pain, Nobody takes the arm, he has the Postal Deathlock applied! Blaze trying to reach the ropes, he can't! Nobody has this thing locked in dead center in the middle of the ring! Blaze screaming in pain, but he will not tap!! Blaze has passed out in the clutches of the Postal Deathlock! The referee over to check, he raises Blaze's arm it falls, he raises it again, it falls, he raises it again, and Thorne just nailed the referee with a chair before he could see Blaze's arm fall a third time!
GP: Blaze has been in that Postal Deathlock for about three minutes and he is completely limp. Thorne over now, he finally breaks the hold, he grabs Nobody, German Suplex! He rolls through, now locking Nobody in a waistlock, Belly To Belly Suplex! He's rolling through again, locks Nobody in a full nelson, Dragon Suplex! Bridges, 1, 2, kickout! Thorne nearly gets the win with a beautiful array of suplexes, Nobody back to his feet, and he nearly takes Thorne's head off with one hell of a clothesline!
JT: Nobody now working on Thorne, it looks like whichever of these two uys can incapacitate the other will win, since Blaze is still unconsious from that Postal Death Lock. Nobody with a nice simple vertical suplex, he goes up top, drives the point of the elbow right into his skull! Dwight D. is firing away, he sets him up, has him up, Seated Crucifix Bomb! 1, 2, and Thorne claps his legs over Nobody's ears to break the count.
Thorne and Nobody each off the ropes, DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE!!! ALL THREE MEN DOWN!
Roxx: Blaze is slowly getting to his feet, he's the first man up, he wraps up Nobody for a hurricanrana, but Thorne is coming up behind, Blaze grabs his head, and rolls, sending both guys down to the ground! Blaze charges at Thorne, Spear! He jumps to the top rope, what a leap, somersaulting reverse cross body!!! Cover! 1, 2, kickout! Blaze jumps back upstairs, secodn rope this time, flying hangman neckbreaker on Nobody! Blaze up, turns, AND HE TURNED RIGHT INTO A DIVING SHOULDERBLOCK BY THORNE!
GP: Thorne now with the decided edge in this one, he takes Blaze up top, Blaze blocks a potential top rope slam, THERE'S THE INFERNO! INFERNO OFF OF THE TOP AGAIN! Thorne's out, and Nobody manages to grab hold of Blaze, he hooks a leg, Fisherman's Suplex, he rolls through, releases the hold. Blaze is on his feet damn near out, Nobody jumps up and pegs him with a dropkick. Nobody walks over to the downed Blaze, standing Senton splash! He makes a nonchalant cover from that position, 1, 2, and kickout again! Blaze trying to counter, he jumps, and catches Nobody off guard with a flying headscissor takeover!
JT: Nobody looks tires at this point, this match has taken a lot out of him. Thorne over to Nobody, a takedown, and teh Zion Kneebar locked on! Blaze up behind and puts him in a sleeperhold! Thorne releases the Kneebar in an effort to protect himself, and he rams Blaze into the corner! Thorne backs up, Avalanche on Blaze! He throws him to the ground, Standing Frog Splash! He shoots Blaze in, but Blaze counters with an Asai Moonsault!
Roxx: A stunned Thorne gets back up, he runs at Blaze, who chops him down like a tree! Blaze sends Thorne to teh corner and is laying those chops in big time! Blaze takes his head, double underhook, off the ropes springboarding, a Double Arm Tornado DDT! Nobody now getting up, he Brainbusters Blaze, now he has David Thorne, he puts him on the top rope... . TOP ROPE GERMAN SUPLEX TO THE OUTSIDE! THORNE MAY BE DEAD! Blaze now ascending the ropes... ... A SKY TWISTER PRESS TO THE OUTSIDE FLATTENS DWIGHT D. NOBODY! Nobody climbing to another buckle, as Blaze and Thorne brawl in the ring, Blaze is shoved down...
GP: LUTHESS PRESS OFF OF THE TOP TURNBUCKLE! NOBODY HAMMERING AWAY! Dwight is owning Thorne here! Thorne having difficulty covering up, and he gets nailed by Blaze!!! Blaze had a chair in his hand, he legdropped Thorne and nailed Nobody with that chair in the same instant! Nobody's in severe pain! Nobody lying there out, Thorne trying to get a pump handle slam, he tries, blocked, tries again, blocked, third time is the charm, up to the shoulder, PUMP HANDLE POWERSLAM!
JT: This has been an outstanding match! Blaze is hammering away on David Thorne, and he delivers a vicious high kneelift! Blaze now jumps sunset flip, 1, 2, kickout! Thorne hanging on desperately to this match, he grabs Blaze by the ankle, Ankelock Submission locked on tight! Blaze screaming in pain, he reaches, and he manages to get hold of the bottom strand! Thorne is irate!
Roxx: Nobody has hold of a steel chair, Thorne holding Blaze in position.. Nobody swings, BLAZE MOVES!!! THAT CHAIR NAILED THORNE RIGHT IN THE SKULL! BLAZE WITH A VANDAMINATOR!! DRIVES THE CHAIR BACK INTO DWIGHT'S FACE! Blaze moves the chair out of the ring, covers, 1, 2, 3! It is over, and Blaze emerges as the #1 Contender for the US Title!
GP: Another #1 contender set!! Blaze celebrates as he leaves the ring... .
JT: As every other winner would, you f*cking moron! Let's get to the next match.
TV Title Match
Triple Threat Match
The Black Assassin -c- v. John "Vampyre" McRae vs. High Flyer
GP- Well, it's now time for the three way dance for the TV Title!
JT- Must you always be so excited about every match, Greg?
GP- I'm just doing my job.
JT- Me too.
Roxx- Hey, look in the crowd... .front row over there... .is that who I think it is?
JT- It looks like... .
GP- It must be... .
Roxx- It is!!
(the camera points out Ozzy Osbourne wearing a John McRae shirt and frantically waving the camera.)
GP- I guess Ozzy must be a fan of McRae. Go figure.
Roxx- Let's just get onto the match. We have High Flyer, John McRae and the current IWO TV Champ, The Black Assasian all in one match for the title.
GP- It sure does look to be a good one! Let's go down to the ring announcer for the introductions...
Ring Announcer - Ladies and gentlemen... this match is scheculed for one fall, and a triple threat match for the Television title. Making his way down... weighing in at 217 pounds... HIGH FLYER!!!
("Americana" by The Offspring kicks up over the PA as High Flyer steps inside the ring.)
Ring Announcer - Another competitor in this three way dance... weighing in at 276 pounds... being accompined by Lindley Taber... JOHN "VAMPYRE" McRAE!!
("Mouth" by Bush cuts in as Lindley walks out and stands by ringside and McRae enteres the ring.)
Ring Announcer - And their opponent... weighing in at 325 pounds... . being accompined by Spider... member of the AAA... the current IWO Television Champion... THE BLACK ASSASSIN!!!
("Seek and Destory" by Metallica blasts through the arena now as the Black Assassin walks out with Spider.)
GP - This match is underway! We have all three men in the ring. Test of strength, McRae has a slight advantage ... . High Flyer coming back ... High Flyer scoops him up POWER SLAM!! High Flyer stomping the face of McRae.
That's not nessecary! Good moves by Flyer.
Roxx - Assassin whipped to the ropes, High Flyer follow in with a big clothes line! This
match sorta sucks.
JT - Be quiet for once Teddy.
Roxx - You wanna get hurt?
JT - Back to the match...
GP - A huge boot to the face sends TBA off his feet! The Black Assassin taking an
onslaught of punishment! John McRae is pounding away at his entire body! Atomic
Drop by McRae sends The Black Assassin(TBA) to the ground!
JT - TBA hops back to his feet. Kick to the gut knocks High Flyer out of balance.
TBA follows up with a running knee lift to take him down!! High Flyer is shook
with a big elbow!
Roxx - Flyer hops back to his feet quick. That guy bearly even felt it!
GP - TBA applys a headlock and bulldogs High Flyer to the ground! High Flyer driving a
knee into the spinal area of Flyer's back!! Tie up... Who's gonna come out on
Roxx - Well, TBA just executed a beautiful spinning neck breaker so I'm gonna
have to say Black Assassin.
JT - Lock up... High Flyer with an armdrag takedown. Currently this match is all
High Flyer it looks!
GP - TBA's face is being slammed over and over by McRae.
JT - That could cave in his face!! McRae drops a knee on lower leg of Balck Assassin!
McRae stomping away at the chest of TBA!
Roxx - High Flyer measuring him up elbow smash!
JT- Assassin with repeated boots to the knee of High Flyer. Working the leg!
GP - TBA spending quite a bit of time measuring him up. Falling fist to the
chest of High Flyer.
JT - Leg drop across the throat of McRae! Atomic Drop by TBA send McRae to
the ground! TBA with repeated boots to the knee of McRae. Working the leg!
Roxx - Leg drop across the throat of McRae again! McRae taking an onslaught of
punishment! TBA is pounding away at his entire body! Currently this match
is all Black Assassin!
GP - You said it! Look at that bulge!
JT - Would you stop it?
GP - SERIOUSLY!
JT: Whatever... .
Roxx - Keep on talking!
JT - A huge boot to the face sends High Flyer off his feet!
GP - High Flyer repeatedly slamming TBA's down! He could break his nose!! Flyer is
moving back to his feet Figure four attempt by Flyer. TBA kicks him off quick.
Roxx - That could have been the end of Black Assassin! Could have been no more title for him.
GP - McRae rocks him with a forearm!!
JT - High Flyer out of no where with a corkscrew hurricanrana! TBA went down
quick! High Flyer is trying to apply a figure four!!
GP - Black Assassin got out of it! He's lucky! Flyer dives on to TBA and applies a
headlock. He's pounding away at the forehead of TBA!
Roxx - What an incredible series of punches!! TBA driving a knee into the spinal area of McRae's back!! OUCH!!
JT - McRae is moving back to his feet... what an awesome match!!!!
GP - Good call! Vampyre is all over TBA! He's choking him out!! Black Assassin won't be
able to take that for long!
JT - TBA climbing back to his feet, High Flyer moves in... Vertical Suplex! Black Assassin
is out cold! Flyer's going for a boston crab.
Roxx - He's not gonna get it on TBA is to quick!
JT - TBA is shook with a big elbow! Flyer stomping the face of TBA. There's
no need for that!
GP - McRae picks him up in a firemans carry, and drops him right on his face!
Roxx - A running lariate from TBA eliminates McRae! What a move!!
GP - High Flyer picks him up tilt-o-whirl slam!! Down goes McRae. Good moves by John McRae.
JT - High Flyer lifting McRae into position for something. He devastated the neck
of McRae with a Tombstone type piledriver. Piledriver... Good Move wouldn't
you say Roxx?
Roxx - Does it hurt? Then it's good! High Flyer comes down across the back of McRae
with a double axe handle!! Vampyre just can't make it to his feet!
GP - McRae moving to his feet. High Flyer kicks him back down! Flyer pulling McRae
back to his feet. Closed fists to the face of McRae! Those are devastating!!!
JT - Diving forearm sends the High Flyer to the mat!!
Roxx - Unbelievable wrestling! This is what makes IWO #1!! High Flyer rocks him with a forearm!! Tie up... Who's gonna come out on top GP?
GP - Well, Flyer just executed a beautiful spinning neck breaker so I'm gonna
have to say High Flyer. He is moving back to his feet
JT - McRae lunging toward Flyer and knocking off his feet!! Desperation
maneuver by John McRae!!
GP - A huge boot to the face sends McRae off his feet! High Flyer stomping away at
the chest of McRae! High Flyer repeatedly slamming McRae down! He could break
his nose or something!!
Roxx - Currently this match is all Flyer! He's driving a knee into the spinal
area of McRaes back!! McRaes face is being slammed over and over by High Flyer
GP - That could cave in his face!!
JT - High Fyer spending quite a bit of time measuring him up. Falling fist to the
chest of McRae
GP - High Flyer drops a knee on lower leg of McRae! Flyer driving a knee into the
spinal area of John McRae's back!!
Roxx - What a knee drop!
JT - Yep!
Roxx - For all the smart remarks you made tonight, JT, which was a couple... I wish Nikki was here to slap you!
JT - I wish she was here to show puppies!
Roxx - McRae with repeated boots to the knee of High Flyer. Working the leg!
GP - McRae stomping away at the chest of High Flyer!
JT - Larson measuring him up elbow smash! WE WANT BLOOD!!!
Roxx - You and your love for blood... EWWW!!!
GP - Leg drop across the throat of McRae! High Flyer repeatedly slamming McRae
down! He could break his nose!! Lock up... High Flyer with an armdrag takedown.
JT - McRae's face is being slammed over and over by High Flyer
GP - That could cave in his face!! Wait... High Flyer is moving back to his feet McRae
moving to his feet. Flyer kicks him back down!
Roxx - High Flyer is trying to pull McRae back to his feet. McRae with an eye
gouge!! Down goes Flyer! McRae pulling High Flyer back to his feet. Huge Bulldog
by McRae may have broken some of High Flyer's teeth!
GP - And look at the Black Assassin, he's taking a break outside the ring with Spider!
JT - Flyer needs to try for a comeback! McRae's going for a boston crab. He's not gonna get it on High Flyer is to quick!
Roxx - All three men back in the ring and up...
GP - The three men begin circling each other and then all of a sudden McRae and TBA together tackle High Flyer down and begin beating on him. High Flyer is able to push off McRae off of him and he soon pushes off TBA as well and jumps back up to his feet. Oh My! A double clothesline by High Flyer to take down both of his opponents just as they got back up to their feet.
JT - Get up TBA! High Flyer now quickly moves on as he grabs McRae by the hair and lifts him back up, and then scoop slam him back down. Good move!
Roxx - Now TBA is back up and he grabs his opponent down and delivers a huge fisherman's suplex on High Flyer. Now McRae gets back up and begins kicking down High Flyer along with Black Assassin. Now Vampyre turns on TBA and nails him with a DDT. No, TBA reverses it into a northern lights suplex. NO... High Flkyer grabs him by the legs and pulls him down along with John McRae who loses his balance.
GP - Sopme really great action by all three men, I wonder if Black Assassin can keep his title.
JT - Maybe with the help of Spider.
Roxx - High Flyer sounds sorta cool, Vampyre is too dull, but Black Assassin could kick ass!!
GP - High Flyer is now back up and he grabs John McRae and lifts him back up to his feet and sends him crashing into the ropes, and he duxks a clothesline on the way back. TBA is now back up as well and he attacks High Flyer from behind. Oh God! What a reverse DDT by The Black Assassin as Flyer might be out after that one. Wait, McRae is almost on the top turnbuckle as everyone forgot about him. But TBA sees him in time and he goes up top and blacks the frog splash. He goes for the puches... 1... 2... 3.. 4... 5... 6... Oh, both Vampyre and TBA go down hard crashing to the canvas.
JT - This is what makes IWO the best, great talnt, great matches! High Flyer was just able to connect with a pump handle slam on McRae, and now he is grabbed again by TBA... Oh! A big piledriver by TBA on High Flyer.
Roxx - John McRae has the cover on High Flyer. Oh! TBA recovered and with a chair, he lays out McRae from behind!! John's leg must be in much pain. Black Assassin is now back up but somewhat dizzy and he begins climbing to the turnbuckle, and he nailed a Shooting Star Press!, NO! High Flyer moved! Flyer bringing TBA up to the turnbuckle again, and going for the Superplex and NAILS IT! Both men go down hard and now all three wrestlers are down and hurt.
GP - Spider looking on from the outside and he looks a little p*ssed.
JT - He sure does! Wait... . McRae begins to slowly get back up but as he stands up on his hurt leg he falls back down and catches it in pain. High Flyer is back up now again and he gets the chair again and puts it in the center of the ring and lifts up TBA back to his feet and drags him over to it. A DDT by Flyer, no, TBA blocks it and he delivers a gutwrench power bomb onto the steel chair and all three men are down again.
Roxx - This match keeps going bakc and forth, back and forth, who knows who'll win right now! But wait... McRae now revitalizes and begins climbing up top. TBA gets back up to his feet yet again and doesn't reliaze what's going on... FLYING MOONSAULT ONTO BOTH HIGH FLYER AND TBA!!!!
GP - There's a cover... . 1... ...
JT - 2... ... .
Roxx - 3!!!!! THIS ONE'S OVER!!!
Ring Announcer - Ladies and gentlemen... the winner of this match and NEW IWO Television Champion... . JOHN "VAMPYRE" McRAE!!!
JT - THE WINNER: JOHN McRAE!!
GP - He already said that. What has just happened was amazing showing from these three guys as "Vampyre" comes out on top!
Roxx - I'm sure TBA has stuff to say!
US Title Match
RaynMan -c- v. Shawn Carter
GP - We now have for you a United States Title match. RaynMan, is the champ, and he's defending it against Carter who is the number one contender.
JT - RaynMan is from the Bomb Squad. He has an advantage.
Roxx - Let's go directly to the match!
GP - Whatever you sat, Teddy.
("PE 2000" by Puff Daddy plays as Shawn Carter walks out to the ring)
Ring Announcer - Introducting first, half-man and half-amazing, weighing in at 275 pounds... SHAWN CARTER!!
("Breate" by Prodigy plays as Raynman walks out to the ring as well)
Ring Announcer - And his opponent.. weighing in at 200 pounds... the United States Champion... . RAYNMAN!!!
JT - The Champ looks to be in very good shape and ready for this match. I think he'll win it.
Roxx - Doubtful.
GP - Time will tell if this is one of the rare times JT is right.
JT - Thank you. Hey, was that some kind of insult?
Roxx - When it's directed at you, yes.
GP - This match for the US Title is now under way. The two men lock up. Raynman takes control, but now Carter moves into control. They break the tie up. Raynamn gets Carter with a thumb to the eye and backs him into the ropes. He whips Carter across. Flying clothesline from Raynman connects with Carter and nearly takes Shanw's head off in the process. Raynman proceeds quickly, though. Elbowdrop on Carter. A quick cover. 1... ... ..kickout from Carter. Carter gets right back to his feet. Kick to the stomach from Carter, but his foot is caught by Raynman. Trun around and puch down from Carter!!
Roxx - Good move from Carter. He pulls up Raynaman. Bodyslam. Carter goes to the top rope. Moonsault attempt coming up. He leaps but Raynman moves and Carter hits the canvas.
JT - Go Raynman! Make the people proud!
GP - Raynman scoops up Carter. Powerslam from Carter. The mat shook on impact. Raynman picks up Carter. Backbreaker from Raynman. He holds Carter on his knee to keep up the pressure. Carter seems to be getting back up. The two men are on their feet. Carter nails Raynman with a good fist to the jaw, Raynman fires a punch of his own, and now we have a fist fight. A big roundhouse from Raynman staggers Carter back into the ropes. Raynman charges but stone ducks and backdrops Raynman over the top rope and to the floor. Carter goes to the top rope. Flying axhandle on Raynamn drives the big man into the guardrail.
JT - This is not good for Raynman.
Roxx - Naww... REALLY?
JT - REALLY!!
Roxx - *sigh*
JT - Don't start acting ike Nikki or Angel!
GP - And it's not going to get any better. Carter has the steel steps and he drives them into the back of Raynamn. And again. Carter lifts up Raynman in position for a belly to back suplex but instead moves backward into the ring post, driving the back of Raynman into the steel. Raynman is in a great deal of pain. He has a grimace on his face. Shawn won't let up, though. Kick to the back by Carter, and a series of them. Carter is keeping it up and not letting Raynman get a chance to recover. Carter now helps Raynman up, only to push him back-first into the guardrail. But Raynman isn't near out of this one. He lifts Carter up by the throat and tosses him ino the ring apron.
Roxx - But Ryanmna is not in good shape. His back will be a hindurance.
JT - Nevermind, he'll still do it. Go Raynman!
GP - Raynman is trying to take control. He whips Carter into the guardrail. He clotheslines Carter over the guardrail and into the seats. Carter took some fall on that one, with various parts of his body landing on three seats.
Roxx - Ouch.
GP - Raynman keeps the momentum going, though. He pulls Carter back into the ring area. Tosses Carter into the ring post. Now he sends Shawn back into the ring. Suplex coming up here from Raynman. He gets Carter up and holds him. This is impressive, considering the shape Raynman's back is in. He finally brings him down. Raynman pulls up Carter. Neckbreaker from Raynman. A cover, 1... ... ..2...
no! A kickout from Carter. Raynman is going to try and bring Carter up to the top rope for the RayCanna, but Carter fights back. Raynman stops him with a knee to the gut. Wristlock, into a short clothesline from Raynman.
JT - Look at Raynman now. Hurt back and all, he's still in control. It's only a matter of time before he puts him away.
Roxx - We'll see about that. Belly to belly suplex from Raynman. I have to admit, he's looked good. A cover, 1... ... ..2... ... no! Carter isn't hurt enough to be pinned. Scoop and a slam by Raynman. Legdrop on Carter. Raynman rolls to the outside. He pulls a table out from under the ring and sets it up on the floor. He re enters the ring and picks Carter up for a power bomb. He's going to power bomb him through the table! But the ref pulls the table away and stands directly below Raynman. Raynman moves over and drops Carter to the outside. Carter landed on his neck. THE REF IS GETTING MAD AT RAYNMAN NOW!!
JT - That looked ugly.
GP - No doubt about it. Raynman goes outside and pushes the ref aside. He's going up top, and he's taking Carter with him. He picks him up in position for a power bomb. But Shawn Carter lands several punches to the head of Raynman, and he slips out. Backdrop off the top rope by Carter. He staggers to pick Raynman up, and keeps is balance, HE DROPED HIM WITH AN INVERTED POWERBOMB!! IT'S THE BLACKOUT FROM SHAWN CARTER!!! COVER... . 1... 2... .3!!!!!!!
Roxx - New U.S. Champ!
JT - No, no, no...
Roxx - Looks like JT was wrong again.
JT - You don't have to rub it in.
Roxx - Wrong again, yes I do.
GP - A good night for Shawn Carter, who proved that he is 'Half-Man, Half-Amazing' by winning the United States Title via the Blackout!
I/C Tag Title Match
The Prep Kids vs. Foreign Legion-c-
GP: Time for the next match-up of the evening! The Prep Kids get an I/C Tag Title shot against Foreign Legion!
Roxx: Y'know Greg.. I don't like the Prep Kids one bit! I hope they lose!
Ring Announcer: This match is scheduled for one fall, and is for the IWO Intercontinental Tag Team Championships! Introducing first, the challenges, weighing in at a total combined weight of 397 pounds. Being accompanied to the ring by "Ash" Chris Zimmerman, the team of Jordan Howitt and Randall McCloud, THE PREP KIDS!
("Anthem for the Year 2000" by silverchair begins to play. The Prep Kids, followed by Chris Zimmermen. The fans have a mixed reaction. The Prep Kids slide into the ring)
Ring Announcer: Next, the tag team champions. Weighing in at a total combined weight of 491 pounds. Being accompanied to the ring by Braniac, the team of Crazy Canuck and Brother Al, THE FOREIGN LEGION!
("The Canadian and British National Anthems Mixed" starts to play. From the back, emerges Foreign Legion, with Brainiac. They are carrying the IC Tag Titles. They climb the steps and go into the ring. They pass the titles to the referee)
(Ding a Ling Ding Ding)
GP: And here we go. It looks like Brother Al is gonna start things off against Jordan Howitt. Al and Howitt are gonna start things off with a collar-and-elbow tie-up. Howitt locks on a headlock. Spins around to face the other way. Once again..bulldog drives Brother Al face first in the mat. Nice move. Jordan quickly off the ropes. Legdrop to the back of the head! Howitt rolls off and tags in Randall McCloud.McCloud quickly stomping Brother Al.
JT: Hey Roxx...
JT: Angel and Nikki aren't here!
JT: We can say whatever we want! YOU WHORES!!
GP: Will you two shut up? When they come back they'll probably slap you senseless!
JT: Good point Greg.
GP: Well, Brother Al is being pulled to his feet by McCloud. Randall sends Brother Al off the ropes. Al ducks the clothesline. He comes back off the ropes with a clothesline of his own. What an impact! McCloud send back two feet! Brother Al is going to slow things down with an arm bar. Jordan Howitt quickly comes in and breaks the hold.
JT: Damn it! He shoulda broke his damn arm! Damn you Howitt!
Roxx: Shut your damn mouth!
GP: SHUT UP! Brother Al has tagged in Crazy Canuck. Canuck viciously attacking Randall McCloud. Stomping away at his back. Canuck comes off the ropes. Stiff kick to the ribs! You could hear the impact! McCloud hanging on to his ribs. Crazy Canuck back off the ropes again with yet another Stiff Kick to the ribs! Randall's ribs have got to be hurting.
JT: You're right Greg.
GP: About what?
JT: Angel is a slut.
GP: I DIDN'T SAY THAT!
Roxx: Yes you did Greg. We heard you!
GP: UGH. I am starting to get a little mad at those two. Back in the ring... Canuck is pulling Randall back to his feet. Only to knock him back down again with a stiff right hand to the jaw. Canuck drops the elbow on the chest of McCloud. Crazy Canuck with a quick stomp to the chest of Randall. Canuck is pulling McCloud back up to his feet. Randall is firing back with some punches to the stomache of Crazy Canuck.
GP: Whats so funny??
JT: Nothing... ..
GP: Ok... .. JT... you and Roxx seem to be getting along. Crazy Canuck is doubled over. Randall kicks Canuck in the back of the knee, sending him down to the mat. McCloud now up. Randall to the ring apron... .Springboard Legdrop back into the ring. The cover! 1..2..Kickout! Still to early to get the win. Randall makes the tag to Howitt, who, before being tagged in, climbed to the top. He is waiting for Canuck to get up. Canuck is on his knees. But he still doesn't notice Howitt on top. Canuck is up.And he is taken to the mat by a flying clothesline! Jordan makes the cover. 1..2.Kickout! Howitt seems to be getting frustrated already..that might cost him.
JT: Hey, Greg. We have decided, since Angel and Summer aren't here, someone has to get slapped. And that someone is you! And the people who get to do it are... .
GP: Let me guess you and Roxx?
JT: YES! You win a million dollars!
JT How do you like that huh?
GP: STOP IT!
Roxx: Since JT and Greg are busy... . I will take over commentary, for a little..
Roxx: ... While. Jordan Howitt is being hammered on by The Crazy Canuck. The Crazy Canuck hits Howitt with a right hand. Then a cheap... .
Roxx: Chop... Damn... that is getting annoying! It is my turn JT! You do commentary!
GP: OUCH!! THAT HURTS!
JT: Hehehe this is fun! Anyway. Where Roxx left off... . hey Teddy, where did you leave off?
Roxx: After the chop.
GP:DAMN IT THAT HURTS!
JT: Well, Canuck has Howitt set up for a gut wrench. He nails a gut wrech suplex. Hey, now that I think about it... that must hurt!
GP: STOP THAT!
JT: Well, um. The Crazy Canuck is gonna tag in Brother Al. Brother Al stomps Howitt a couple times.
JT: Roxx, you take over! I wanna do some smackin!
Roxx: AW Man! It was just gettin fun! Oh well. Brother Al has Howitt on the middle rope. Al is climbing up the ropes. He starts punching..1... 2... 3... 4... 5... 6... 7... 8.. Jordan Howitt pushes him off. Brother Al is stunned! Jordan is up on top. He jumps off..hurricanrana! No! Reversed into a powerbomb by Brother Al! Brother Al makes a cover. 1..2..
Roxx: Howitt kicked out. But it looks like a fight at the announce position! JT vs GP! I'm gonna have to commentate both matches! In the ring, Howitt recieves a drop toe hold after being sent off the ropes. Brother Al rolls through to lock in the headlock. Now on the outside..
Roxx: Greg with a hard open palm slap to the face of JT!
Roxx: JT firing back with one of his own! In the ring... . Howitt is trying to get to the ropes. But what does that matter?!
Roxx: OW! What was that for?
GP: Back. Ouch.
Roxx: JT Smacks Greg again. Back in the ring, Crazy Canuck has just been tagged in. Hey JT tag me in!
(JT slaps Roxx's hand)
JT: Roxx is winding up! Open hand slap!
JT: In the ring, The Canuck whips Howitt into the turnbuckle. Howitt stumbles out to be met by a Gargoyle Suplex.
JT: Back to the outside! GP with a hard slap to Roxx! Now, on the inside. Canuck picks Howitt up. Front face lock.. DDT! Canuck making a quick cover. 1..2..3! No! Howitt kicked out at the last second. Randall McCloud trying to tag Howitt but can't quite reach!
Roxx: Damn it Greg! You asked for it!
JT: Go Roxx! I am supposed to be commentating the in-ring action... but this is so much better! Tag me in again Roxx!
(JT slaps Roxx's hand)
GP: AHHH! I GIVE UP!
Roxx: And your winners... the team of Teddy Roxx and JT!!
GP: That hurt! Commentate the match will ya?
Roxx: Oops. Well, Canuck has Howitt in a full nelson. Dragon Suplex! And the bridge! 1..2..No! Kickout! Amazing! Maybe I was wrong about the Prep Kids? Wait! What am I saying! They suck!
GP: Well, everybody has their own opinion. I actually think The Prep Kids might take this match!
JT: They suck!
GP: Suit yourself... anyway. Canuck tags in Brother Al. Al quickly in. He kicks Howitt in the stomache. Powerbomb!
JT: He's signaling for it! The Diploma! He is locking it on! Canuck is in the ring keepig McCloud from breaking it!
Roxx: Yes! It's locked on!
JT: Break his legs!
GP: Howitt is tapping! The referee is calling for the bell.
Roxx: I knew it! We told ya The Prep Kids sucked! But you didn't believe us!
GP: Well, the Prep Kids lose. Foreign Legion retain the titles. However, the Kids had a great showing... and have a great career in the future.
Roxx: Sure they do. You go on and believe that... .but... .me and the millions [and millions] of Teddy's fans know that they SUCK!! SPELL IT OUT!! S as in Sad! U as in Ugly! C as in Crap! K as in... .SUCK! THEY SUCK! Let's... don't give me that look Greg, I'll smack your face right off your head... let's just move on to the next match.
Pacific Title Match
Ken War -c- v. Justin Shack
GP:: We are now in the middle of Heatstroke and what a event this awsome pay per view has been! Justin Shack against Ken War.. PACIFIC TITLE MATCH!! And what a match it will be!
JT:: Yes.. And lets head down to the ring announcer for this bout!
Roxx:: But first.. I am the great one! NOW WE CAN GO DOWN TO THE RING ANNOUNCER!
Ring Announcer:: This match is set for one fall and it is for the IWO PACIFIC TITLE!! First the challenger... .
["Disconnect" by The Rolands Band plays as Justin Shack comes walking to the ring.. He is very cocky..]
Ring Announcer:: A former United States Champion and Intercontenental Tag Team Champion.. HE IS JUSTIN SHACK!!
Ring Announcer:: Now, the champion!!
["Kiss My Ass" by Ted Nugent.. plays as Ken War makes his way to the ring with the pacific title aroun his waist! The crowd is goin nuts!]
RIng Announcer:: He is the CURRENT IWO PACIFIC CHAMPION.. "THE WARMACHINE" KEN WAR!!!
[DING DING DING]
Roxx:: okay, were off here in this Pacific Title Match! Shack cycles War and now goes straight at him.. He grabs War and German Suplexes him! 1... .2... and Ken War gets the shoulder up! Now Shack stomps on War.. And throws him into the ropes.. War comes back and Shack clotheslines him! War is down yet again! Shack now with the press! 1... .2... and no! Ken War gets the kick out again!
GP:: Justin Shack showing no signs of tiredness gets War up and delievers a power slam! Shack drops a leg.. Another one! Shack runs the ropes and SPLASHES ON WAR.. He lays on War as the ref counts! 1... 2... .and no War kicks out again!
JT:: The crowd is chanting "War Machine".. War gets up and punches Shack.. Another punch! And another! War lays Shack out and makes a quick pin! 1... .2... and Shack gets the shoulder up!
Roxx:: Shack is still in this matchup.. Ken War runs the ropes and comes back and drops a knee to the stomach of Justin Shack! Shack screams out in pain! Ken War grabs Shack up.. And a scoop slam!
GP:: Now, War gets Shack and chokeslams him! The press! 1... .2... .NO NO NO! SHACK KICKED OUT! Nice work Shack! He limited his air and kicked out!
JT:: Whatever! Now Shack gets up and two eyes War! War is holding his head and Shack gets a spin wheel kick connected! The cover! 1... .2... thr! no no the ref says two!
Roxx:: Justin Shack is starting to get upset! He gets War's head and bashes it into the mat.. War screams in pain as Justin keeps on doing it! Shack runs the ropes and a sliding drop kick!
GP:: Now Shack gets War on his shoulders.. HE SPINS AROUND AND HITS A DEATH VALLEY DRIVER!! WHAT A MOVE BY THE INNOVATOR OF OFFENSE!!! Now Shack makes the cover! 1... ..2... .. NO AND WAR KICKS OUT AGAIN!
JT:: War is into this! He gets up! HE HAS RISEN!! HE GETS SHACK AND HITS HIM OVER THE HEAD REALLY REALLY HARD!!! SHACK FALLS!!! War gets him up and is choking him!
Roxx:: Don't get dqed War... Thats what Shack wants you to do.. Wait no he doesn't.. Cause then he couldn't win the Pacific Title! Shack gets up and sweep kicks War.. War falls on his back hard..
GP:: War now gets up and Shack scoop slams him! He drops an elbow.. Anotheer one.. Shack gets War up and AN AWSOME PILEDRIVER!!! THE COVER!! THAT HAS TO BE ALL!!
JT:: 1... ... 2... .AND NO! KEN WAR KICKED OUT YET AGAIN! Ken War is a crazy Son Of A B*tch! He isn't smart enough to stay down! Pour soul! Shack is kicking the crap out of him!
Roxx:: Now look at this! Shack is on the turnbuckle!! He jumps off... 360 SPLASH ON WAR.. HE MISSED AND HIT THAT METAL BLADE ON KEN WAR'S BOOT!! SQUARE IN THE FACE!!!
GP:: Things are now going the way of Ken War now! War gets up! Shacks face has a slash of blood on it! War grins and continues to inflict punishement on Shack! Going after that bad face.
JT:: How is Shack going to continue?
Roxx:: I have no idea!!
GP:: He will.. He is a fighter!
JT:: HAAH! A whimp fighter!
Roxx:: None the less, he is a great superb fighter! Now Justin Shack gets up and trips War.. He runs the ropes and gives Ken War an elbow drop! Now Shack gets War up and powerbombs him to the outside of the ring..
GP:: What stregnth by Justin Shack! Shack now gets out of the ring.. THe ref is looking at the ropes for some strange reason.. Shack gets and chair and throws it into the gut of Ken War..
JT:: Now war is bleeding from the mouth! War has suffered enternal bleeding!! He is bleeding from the mouth! A little bit.. Shack rams the chair into the gut again! That chair is goinig straight into the stomach of Ken War..
Roxx:: This is career threating injury! And Shack is just laughing! As he keeps ramming the chair to the stomach of Ken War.. The blood is now rushing out of the mouth of War.. It is now all over his chin and stll coming out of his mouth! His teeth in his mouth are covered in blood..
GP:: This is sickning to watch! Shack slides into the ring... And tells the ref to count the enternal bleeding War out! The referee starts the count... .1... .2... 3... .4... .5... .6... .7... 8... 9... ANd Shack slides out of the ring.. And throws War into the ring.. A trail of his blood is in the ring!
JT:: Now Shack stomps on the stomach.. This is bad.. If you left to get a pizza or something.. Justin Shack has made Ken War bleed enternally! As we see.. Docters are rushing to the ring..
Roxx:: But Shack won't let them come in! As he drops a knee to the gut! He has picked the part he wants to hurt and so far he has done something.. NO BODY IN THE IWO HAS EVER DONE TO KEN WAR!!
GP:: Shack tells the ref to look at War.. And Shack makes the pin! 1... ..2... but Shack brings War up! This is not right! Justin Shack is killing War! And the worse part is.. Ken War is STILL bleeding enternally!
JT:: Justin Shack is signing his own death wish! Because win or loose this match.. After it Ken War is going to want some revenge! And it won't be pretty! Shack now locks in a stomach breaker.. Where his legs are around the waist of Ken War and he is punching the stomach..
Roxx:: Blood is still flowing out of the mouth! It is dripping all over his body! Shack gets War up.. But War stumbles to the ground..
GP:: Shack says "No go F*ck off"... Now Shack holds War up.. Shack Attack(Snap DDT)!! Thats it! He could of broken his neck! Shack is going to die after this match! Shack holds up War again...
JT:: Shacked For Life(Sitting Pedigree)!!! God Damnit! This is not fair! D*MN YOU JUSTIN SHACK!! YOU PIECE OF CRAP!!! This is not fair! As much as I like him as a wrestler he is going to far..
Roxx:: And before the match.. Both competitiors signed a document not to stop the match even in too much loss of blood!!! So the ref can't do anything about this! Shack goes for the cover!! 1... ... 2... and NO! WAR KICKS OUT!! WAR KICKED OUT!! AMAZING!!!
GP:: Shack gets War... SHACK ATTACK! THE COVER!!! 1... ... 2... ..3!! JUSTIN SHACK HAS BEATEN KEN WAR FOR THE PACIFIC TITLE!!!
Ring Announcer:: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN... THE WINNER OF THIS MATCH.. AND NEWWWWWWW IWO PACIFIC CHAMPION!!! JUSTIN SHACK!!!
Roxx: Wait a minute... .Shack has a mic!!
Shack: Yah know, I'm sick of HOSTILE YOUTH!
War: Me too!
Then War, and Shack shake hands, andraise each others hands.
War: HOSTILE YOUTH! VIOLENT ATTITUDE IS COMING FOR YOU! SO GET THE F*CK READY!
Shack: There will be new IWO Tag Team Champions...
GP: WHAT THE HELL?! WAR AND SHACK! A TEAM?!!? MY GOD!!
JT: Not just any tag team... .a team of two guys who no more than 5 minutes ago BEAT THE SH*T OUTTA EACH OTHER! Let's move on to the next match!
World Tag Team Titles
Hostile Youth 2nd Coming -c- v. The Beverly Hills Bruisers vs. The Outcasts
GP:Well folks this should prove to be the best tag team contest we have seen in weeks!
JT:I gotta agree with you on this one GP I mean you have the Outcasts who are the future of tag team wrestleing... you have the Beverly Hill Bruisers who many say are the tag team of the present... and you have HY2 who many say are the single most influential group of wrestlers in the IWO today!
Roxx:Hell yeah! All three of these teams don't suck! This one is gonna be something else.
GP:Let's take you back a few months folks... let's go back to Beach Party folks when what many say is the best tag team every HY2...
::begin Beach Party replay.::
Ashton:So DANE where is this tag team partner at?
Dane:A fair question Ashton... but... I believe the question is where is your
Ashton:What are you talking about?
::Phelen Kell taps Ashton Cain on his shoulder and as he begins to turn nails
Ashton from behind. Dane Wilt and Phelen Kell begin to beat down Ashton.::
Dane:Ladies and gentlemen I know you all want to see my ability and uncanny
skill so here is the first... my world famous Hurrica Ranna!
::Nails Ashton Cain with a Hurrica Ranna.::
Dane:My amazing top rope moves... like the way a shooting star press should
look! Fat ASS!
::Wilt executes a shooting star press onto Ashton Cain.::
Dane:And as soon as he can move again I'll show you my trademark... my
legacy..the Face Lift... and Ashton buddy... you need one... you always have
looked alittle... well how do you say... unappealing!
::Ashton gets up and Dane nails him with the face lift (super kick) and
knocks him down and out rather quick.::
Dane:Now Phelen... Phelen my buddy... soon we will be tag champs, as we deserve
to be lets introduce the world... all OUR fans to the New and Improved Circle
::Phelen picks Ashton up in a power bomb, Dane climbs to the top and jumps
over Ashton catching him and droping with the power bomb into a sun set
flip... the cover. For the one, two, three and now Dane Wilt and Phelen Kell
are the tag team champions. Phelen stands up and walks over to an announcer
who throws a microphone in the ring. Phelen grabs the microphone and lifts it
to his face. Fans are in shock... .::
Phelen: Ladies and Gentlemen of the Jury... ..I feel that now is as good a
time as any to explain myself... and my actions... to you... .and to my dear
Captain Caveman... who at the moment... .has been rendered unconcious. You see
ladies and gentlemen... .as of late... Ashton Cain... has become dead weight.
Now don't get me wrong... he is a great athlete... but to steal the words
straight from his mouth... .he's a busy guy... and it seems he has no time for
the tag team titles, or he just hasn't been making time for the tag team
titles. So... I'll be nice and LIFT that burden from poor, poor Ashton
Cain... .and give that honor to someone who will work for what he gets... who
won't quit working because he thinks he can let good ol' Phelen handle
things... .a guy that won't run around trying to sport his own career when its
a team effort. Ashton... I gave up the the Television title so that we could
keep these titles, and still I got shafted with the work load and because of
it we lost them... luckily I... ME! I kept us on course and we got the titles
back... and ya know why... .cuz it was for the good of the team. And
then... .still... I'm left with the shaft of the work. I won't do the same for
the world title... that one is mine... and now I have someone who will split
the work of the tag team titles with me. I've got a partner who's gonna help
keep Hostile Youth as the top name of the tag team world! Don't get me
wrong... I still love you fans... ..you made us. But now... .its time for a
change of pace... its time for Hostile Youth to truly become Hostile! The NEW
Hostile Youth! A Second Coming if you will. "Genetic Perfection" Dane
Wilt... ."Phoenix" Phelen Kell... .and the ever delerious Harlequin... things
are gonna be different. To hell with being nice guys... .for those fans who
stay behind us... we love you... for those of you that don't... thats your
poison. Its time for true hostility! So those who doubted the originals... you
now have something to fear. Hostile Youth: Second Coming... has arrived. And
Zombie... I'm coming for you... .the night is still young and I'm fresh as a
daisy... your title is mine.
::Phelen throws the microphone to the ground and picks up he and Danes
titles. The song "Future Breed Machine: Hostile Youth Edit" by Meshuggah
which is the new anthem of Hostile Youth: Second Coming begins to play as the
::End beach party replay.::
GP:That was perhaps the biggest shock of the summer!
Roxx:I loved it! But, then Dane turned out to be a carbon copy of the Rock and Phelen is trying to be EVIL or something... man they are lame now.
JT:AHAHA! You tell them Teddy!
GP:Awwww... this is gonna be a long night! Anyways fans after that match HY2 went up against the team of Zombie and Joey Rappaport... They dominated that match! Now the Deity known as Hostile Youth will have it's toughest competition yet!
Ring Announcer:Ladies and gentlemen the following match is set for one fall and has a thirty minute time limit! Introduceing first at a total combine weight of 564 pounds... they are the masters of the deadly move Welcome to Soceity..here is the "Phreak" Paul Hanson and the "Shrimp" Samuel Potright!
::Red lights begin to flash as "The beutiful people" by Marlyn Manson begins to play. The duo enter the ring to the boos of the crowd.::
Ring Announcer:Introduceing the other challengers... they hail from Beverly Hills Ca... at a total combine weight of exactley 500 lbs... .they are the masters of the sun set over Beverly Hills... they are former I/C tag champions... and are being led to the ring by the lovley Carron Dudley... here is Michael Dudley... Brain Dudley... The Beverly Hills Bruisers!
::"Pretty Fly for a white guy" by Offspring begins to play as the team walk to the ring to the cheers of the crowd.::
Ring Announcer:And their oponents... first he hails from Chicago... he is a former IWO World champion... a former TV champion... and a 3 time tag team champion... he weighs in at 255 lbs. here is the Legend Phelen Kell! And his tag team partner... he is a former North American Champion... he is the master of the amazeing Box Office Smash... here is "Genetic Perfection" Dane Wilt! And with their manager Harlequin... they form Hostile Youth:Second Coming!
::"Future Breed Machine:HY edit" by Meshuggah begins to play. Green strobe lights flash as the tag team champions walk to the ring to the cheers of the crowd. They both get microphones... Dane Wilt is sitting on the top rope and Phelen Kell is standing infront of The Outcasts in the center of the ring. The Bruisers rest over in the cornor.::
Phelen:Well, well, well...
Dane:Hold on Phelen I have a trademark to do... IWO!
Dane:You may proceed.
Phelen:Thank you... well, well, well... it seems that it has come around again... our monthly title defense!
Dane:Man we work our asses off for this company!
Phelen:We sure do... now Jamie
::"The Phreak" Paul Hanson grabs the mic from Kell.::
Paul Hanson:Hey Kell... you know the Outcast's deserve it the most... we have been working our asses off for no reward... we haven't gotten a single break since we've been here... me and the Shrimp beat the piss out of every single tag team last month in the tag team hardcore battle royal! Then we got the biggest screw job ever and didn't get the shots at the I/C or even the world belts that me and the Shrimp deserve! Kell, Wilt I respect you guys for what you have done here... but come on... we are the team that deserve it!
::Phelen Kell nods like he is in agreement. Brian Dudley grabs a mic and looks at Dane.::
Brian:Yo Dane! Remember that time in Hollywood... we cruised the circuit... you picked up that hot blonde with the legs here to Spain... then we went back to the bar... and we woke up in the morning out in the middle of the woods... and we woke up in the middle of the woods and me and Michael found you laying in a pile of your own vomit out in the middle of the lake... you remember all that?
Dane:Yeah that was the life... well the choice is obvious to me!
GP:Oh my! Dane just went up top and did the Box Office Smash (shooting star press into a DDT) on to the Phreak Paul Hanson! Phelen Kell just nailed Potright in the stomach and a running power bomb! Shades of the original Hostile Youth on that one! The outcasts are out HY2 have their mics... .
Dane:Laaaaaaaaddddies and gentlemen... and NEWWWW IWO TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS... ... BRIAN DUDLEY... ..MICHAEL DUDLEY... THE BEVERLY HILLS BRUISERS!
::Dane and Phelen holds up the Bruisers hands.::
Phelen:And remember fans... HY2 NEVER got pinned... we were forced to drop the belts from the head offices of the IWO... but that's okay... the two of us have our sites sent on much higher goals.
::"Pretty Fly for a white guy" by Offspring begins to play as HY2 leaves the ring... but the Bruisers stay in the ring and celebrate.::
GP:Well guys we have new tag team champions... but we didn't see nearly the match we were hopeing for.
JT:AND THE OUTCAST'S GOT SCREWED! NOOOOO!
Roxx:THE ONLY TAG TEAM WORTH THE CHARMIN ULTRA SOFT QUILTED TOLIT PAPER THEY WHIPE THEIR ASSES WITH LOST! THAT BLOWS GOATS!
GP:Wait a sec the Outcasts are up... The Phreak just grabbed Brian Dudley from behind while Brian was on the top and it's the Dudley Deathdrop off the top... they call it welcome to society! Now they have a chair... and they just nailed Michael in the face with it! The Phreak has Michaelup and just put Michael's head in the chair... and the Shrimp just nailed Michael with a knee drop onto the chair! The Outcasts are now leaveing the ring and they have mics.
Phreak:You guys know damn well that those belts belong around our waists! And you know that given the chance we could destroy you! So Bruisers... anytime anyplace... your asses are ours!
Shrimp:And Bruisers... that was just a taste of what we can do!
GP:Wow! The Outcast's are pissed!
Roxx:Can you blame them they got screwed!
JT:Yeah they got screwed!
Extreme Title Match
No Disqualifications Falls Count Anywhere Weapons Match
Jax Stone -c- v Fugite v Phantom
GP: Ohhhh boy! Our next match is going to be a thriller! The Extreme title on the line here, Jax Stone, taking on Fugite, and Phantom. Triple Threat match, weapons match. Falls Count anywhere, and no dqs. It's Heatstroke, SOMETHING BAD IS GONNA HAPPEN RIGHT HERE TONIGHT!
Roxx: Absaloutley right GP. It's gonna get sick to watch, and that's a damn promise.
JT: BLOOD! BLOOD!
GP: Calm down JT, we know you like these kind of matches, it shows IWO's hardcore side. And it will show it good.
Roxx: Enough of you'r blabbing GP, lets get on with it!!
Announcer: This match is set for No Disqualifications Falls Count Anywhere Weapons Match! And it is for the IWO EXTREME TITLE!!!!
(Crowd goes wild!)
Announcer: And Coming to the ring at this time! One of the two challengers! FUGITE!!!!
("Time" by Pink Flyod blasts through out the arena as Fugite walks to the ring)
Announcer: And now coming to the ring, ONE HALF OF ERA X! PHANTOM!!!!!
(Wherever I May Roam by Metallica plays as Phantom walks to the ring pissed)
Announcer: And now introducing the EXTREME CHAMPION... .JAX... .STOOOOONNNNEEE!!!!!!
(Living Dead Girl by Rob Zombie pumps through out the arena as Stone runs down the isle meeting Fugite with hard rights, and lefts!)
GP: And this match is underway! Hard rights, and lefts from Stone, and Fugite! There brawling in the isle! Fugite grabs Stone, and throws his head right into the steel railing! Stone bounces off to a clothesline from Fugite! Here comes Phantom! Running boot! Fugite falls to the isle! Phantom whips Fugite into the steel steps! Phantom picks up Stone, DDT! On the steel ramp way! Stone tumbles, and falls under the ring. Phantom grabs Fugite, but Fugite with a low blow! Face buster on the steel steps! My god! Fugite falls over into the guard rail! Fugite picks up Phantom, and throws him into the ring. Fugite climbing the top, Phantom up, Fugite NAILS A MISSILE DROPKICK!
Roxx: Whatta' move! Wait! Jax Stone! With a barbed wire bat! Slides into the ring! NAILS FUGITE OVER THE HEAD! MY GOD! WHATTA' SHOT! Stone grabs Phantom whips him into the ropes, misses the clothesline, grabs the barbed wire bat, NAILS PHANTOM! PHANTOM HITS THE CANVAS HARD! Jax Stone picks up Phantom, and throws him into the corner. Hard rights, and lefts! Rights! Right to the face of Phantom. Stone throws him into the turnbuckle, and charges, but Fugite with a low blow! Fugite jumps on Stone, TORNADO DDT!
JT: Now Fugite rolls out of the ring, and reaches under the ring. THROWS IN THE GARBAGE CANS! THE CRUTCHES! THE CHAIRS! THE VCR'S! THE TV'S! PORTABLES! GEORGE FORMER GRILL! IWO GETTING CLASSY! Now Fugite rolls into the ring, and grabs a crutch, [CRACK!] Over the damn head! Stone falls out of the ring. Fugite turns to Phantom smiling! Hehehehe! NAILS EM OVER THE HEAD! AGAIN! AGAIN! AGAIN! AGAIN! AGAIN! YES YES YES!!
GP: MY GOD! PHANTOM IS KNOCKED OUT! Fugite is getting pissed! He picks up Phantom, BRAINBUSTER THROUGH THE GARBAGE CAN! Fugite picks up Phantom, and throws him out of the ring. Now Fugite going after Stone with a steel chair. Stone nails Fugite with a boot! Slams his head into the steel steps! Stone has Fugite by the hair, and dragging him to the isle. Nails Fugite with a good few hard shots! Fugite tumbles to the top of the isle! Boot by Stone, JUMPING PILEDRIVER! GOOD GOD! DID YOU HEAR THAT SOUND!?
JT: THIS IS GREAT! BLOOD!?!
Roxx: Not yet! Stone runs at Phantom, and Phantom with a BACKBODY DROP STONE NAILS HIS BACK ON THE EDGE OF THE STEEL STEPS! DAMN! Phantom now reaches into the ring, and grabs a VCR. He steps up the steel steps, Stone on his knees looks up OH DAMNIT!
JT: VCR CRASHING INTO HIS HEAD! MY GOODNESS! THAT WAS AWESOME! Stone is out cold! Phantom picks up Stone, and drags him up the isle, and throws him face down into the steel. Now Phantom picks Fugite, but Fugite with a poke, eye rake! Fugite n ow nailing Phantom with hard rights, and lefts! Phantom is backed up, about to fall off the isle! Fugite now has a chair, runs at Phantom, CHAIR SHOT! PHANTOM FALLS OFF THE ISLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DAMN YOU FUGITE!!!! PHANTOM FALLING THROUGH TWO TABLES!!!!! FUGITE IS LAUGHING! SO AM I! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
GP: FUGITE GRABS STONE, AND TOSSES HIM OFF THE ISLE!!! THIS IS SICK!! FUGITE JUMPS OFF, AND NAILS PHANTOM WITH A CHAIR SHOT!!! FUGITE HIT A PILE OF WOOD DOWN THERE HARD! All three of them just risked there damn carreer! Now Phantom attempting to get up. He reaches, and grabs a 2x4, SMACK! OVER THE BACK OF FUGITE! Stone with a boot, DDT! Stone has a cable wir, and choking the lift out of Phantom! Phantom is turning blue!!
Roxx: Stone has Phantom and is dragging him into the back of the arena. Fugite is following with a super NINTENDO?! Stone, and Phantom are at the food stand. Stone slams Phantoms face into the hot pasta water! AHH! HOT HOT HOT! PHANTOM PICKS UP THE POT, AND THROWS IT AT STONE! Stone tumbles over as that hot damn water pours all over the scratches, and burns! My god! Stone kicking in pain! Wait! Fugite runs at Phantom, and NAILS EM WITH THE SUPER NES! Cracks it over the head of Phantom!
JT: Whoa! Whatta' shot! Fugite throws Phantom on the table. Fugite jumps on it, and grabs Phantom. Hey Wait?! JUMP ON IT! JUMP ON IT! JUMP ON IT! DO... DO DO DO... .DO DO DO... JUMP ON IT JUMP ON IT!
GP: Shut up JT! Now Fugite with a boot, spins him around, GUTRENCH TOMBSTONE! THROUGH THE TABLE!!! OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!! FOOD EVERYWHERE! And Phantom is out cold! Stone gets up, and picks up the dish of Turkey! SLAMS IT AGAINST PHANTOMS FACE. Stone picks up Phantom, and is dragging him down the hallway. Fugite is following. Stone now walking up the stairs with Phantom. Hard rights hand! There at the top of the stairs, that's a long stairway. Little balcony.Stone is bending Phantom's back over the railing! OH GOD! Fugite with a low blow! Stone hanging over the railing, FUGITE THROWS HIM OVER!! MY GOD!! STONE NAILED THE STAIRS HARD! HE'S BUSTED OPEN!! STONE IS COVERED IN BLOOD!
Roxx: Fugite has Phantom knocks the camera out! Damnit!
(Gp Turns to Roxx, and JT)
GP: Great,our camera man is gone. Stone is covered in a puddle of his own blood, and Fugite, and Phantom were going up. My god.
JT: All I know I have a feeling something bad is gonna happen. It's been crazy so far!
Roxx: I have a bad feeling about something.
GP: Like what?
JT: OH MY GOD! LOOK UP! AT THE TOP OF THE ARENA! MY GOD! AAHHH!! FUGITE, AND PHANTOM ARE AT THE TOP OF THE ARENA!!! FIGHTING! BRAWLING! GEEZIST!!! THIS IS INSANE! SOMEONE GET THEM DOWN!
GP: SOMEONE GET THEM! PHANTOM HAS A GOD DAMN SPIKED CLUB! HE'S NAILING FUGITE IN THE HEAD! Fugite is being beaten to a pulp! Phantom picks Fugite up, and is nailing him with that spiked club! Right in the gut! AGAIN! AGAIN! NOW TO THE FACE! FUGITE FLIPS OVER! Oh my god.
Roxx: NO!!! DAMNIT!! NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Fugite falls from the top of the arena, and goes through the ring head first)
GP: OH MYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY GOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PHANTOM!!!!!!!! YOU INSANE SON OF A BITCH!!!!!! MY GOD!!!!!!!
JT: FROM THE TOP OF THE ARENA HERE IN THE TARGET ARENA!!! THE CROWD IS LOVING IT!!!!!!! BUT FUGITE COULD BE DEAD!! HIS CARREER COULD BE WELL OVER!
Roxx: The EMT's are coming down with a stretcher slowly. Yes Fugite may be over in the IWO, and his wrestling carreer.
GP: Phantom watches from the top of the arena.The EMT's are pulling Fugite out of the whole. Doing it very carefully, making sure they don't do anything wrong.
Roxx: Oh shit! LOOK AT THE ISLE! JAX STONE!! HE'S IN A CEMENT TRUCK!! HE'S DRIVING DOWN THE ISLE! THE CROWD LOVES IT!! THE EMT'S ARE GETTING OUT OF THE RING! FUGITE IS HELPLESS! STONE IS POORING CEMENT INTO THE DAMN RING!!! MY GOD! COVERING FUGITE!!! WAIT!! PHANTOM ZIPS DOWN ON A ZIP CORD, LANDING ON THE WINDSHEILD. SLAMS THE SPIKED CLUB AGAINST THE GLASS! HE REACHES IN, AND GRABS STONE! PULLS HIM ON THE WINDSHEILD, PEDIGREE! ON THE BROKEN GLASS!
GP: Now Phantom stops the cement pooring! We can only see a little bit of Fugite! Phantom now grabs Stone, and throws him off the truck! Into the ring! Phantom slides down the little slide that the cement goes through, and falls into the ring. He walks over to Stone, with a crutch in hand, [CRACK!] Phantom picks up Stone, and delivers a hook legged FISHERMEN BUSTER! LORD!
Roxx: Wait a minute! WAIT A DAMN MINUTE! Jax Stone's manager! Johnny Smythe! He's in the ring, and has a sqrewdriver! HE'S DIGGING INTO THE SPINE OF PHANTOM!! MY GOD!! PHANTOM GOES DOWN HARD! JOHNNY SMYTHE IS DISCONNECTING THE SPINE OF PHANTOM! THIS IS DAMN SICK! JOHNNY HAS PHANTOM, AND IS RAKING HIS FACE WITH THAT SQREWDRIVER!!! PHANTOM IS BEING BUSTED OPEN!! JOHNNY SMYTHE NOW WITH A LOW BLOW!!
JT: Smythe hands the sqrewdriver over to Stone, and gets out of the ring. Stone with an elbow drop with the sqrewdriver. Phantom kicking in pain! Stone now goes over to Fugite, and picks him up. Boot, POWERBOMB!! INTO THE HOLE!! FUGITE IS OUT COLD! Stone now has the Extreme Title at his hands. He is wrapping it in barbed wire!! He climbs the top, Phantom gets up, and walks over, GETS NAILED! PHANTOM IS OUT COLD IN THE CEMENT! STONE COVERS!!! 1... .2... ... ... NO! PHANTOM KICKS OUT!
GP: Wouldn't it be smart to pin Fugite?
Roxx: Good call.
GP: I think Stone heard me, cause he got Fugite out of the hole, and sends him into the turnbuckle! He bounces out, bulldog! Fugite can't walk any longer! Stone has Fugite, and kicks him to the grion. Picks up a stop sign, [DINK!] Fugite falls to the cement! Now Phantom getting up slowly, grabs Stone, and throws him out of the ring right in front of us! Phantom walks out of the ring, and grabs Stone. He picks him high over his head, and throws him onto our table! Phantom on the apron, rrrrUNING ELBOW! TO THE THROAT OF STONE!
Roxx: Phantom picks up Stone, and drags him into the ring. Those two are bleeding badly. Phantom grabbing our booth!
JT: Take it!
Roxx: Phantom dragging our booth over right next to the steel steps. He rolls into the ring, and gets Stone. And sets him up on top. Phantom grabs a steel chair, [SMACK!] Across the face! Phantom now climbing the top rope. He picks up Stone, and sets him up with what looks to be A POWERBOMB! NO PHANTOM! PICKS HIM UP, POWERBOMB!!! STONE GOES THROUGH OUR BOOTH ON THE OUTSIDE NAILING THE STEEL STEPS!!!! GEEZIST FU... .
JT: GOD! STONE IS OUT!!! AND IS BADLY BADLY HURT! NO ONE GIVES A DAMN EITHER!!
GP: Phantom hops of the turnbuckle, and goes over to Fugite. Fugite is still not moving. Phantom picks him up, and sends him into the ropes, Fugite comes back, CHOKESLAM!! CHOKESLAM!! CHOKESLAM!! MY GOD! 3 IN A ROW! Fugite has no chance in winning this match. Phantom now gets Fugite up, and throws him out of the ring! Phantom rolls out of the ring, and grabs Stone. Slams his head, head first into the booth!
JT: Stone falls to his knees. Phantom picks him up, GORRILA PRESS! STONE FALLS THROUGH THE SPANISH ANNOUNCE TEAM TABLE!! GOD DAMN YOU PHANTOM! OH SHIT! Stone can't even stand!! Phantom now grabs Stone, and throws him into the ring. He rolls into the ring, and has Stone, and picks him up. Turns him around, boot, Phantom's Crucifix (Crucifix Bomb)! NAILED IT! STONE IS OUT COLD! Wait! FUGITE! HAS A BLOW TORCH!!! GOOD GOD! HE WALKS UP BEHIND PHANTOM, TURNS EM AROUND!! INTO THE FACE!!!!!! THE BLOW TORCH!!! PHANTOM IS ON FIRE!!!!! HIS FACE IS ON FIRE!!!! KICKING IN PAIN!!! MY GOD!!!
GP: FUGITE GETS UP STONE! STONE WITH A LOW BLOW! GRABS THE BLOW TORCH! NAILS FUGITE! FUGITE IS KNOCKED OUT! STONE THROWS THE BLOW TORCH ASIDE. HE PICKS UP FUGITES LEGS, SHARPSHOOTER!!!!! THE SHARPSHOOTER!!!! IT HAS BEEN LOCKED ON FUGITE!! FUGITE SCREAMING IN PAIN!! BLOODIED! STONE IS AS WELL!! SO IS PHANTOM!! STONE IS NOT GONNA LET GO!
Roxx: Fugite can't go anywhere!! His face is burried in the cement! Phantom can't see! His face is burned!! A chunk of his cheek has come off! This is SICK! IM GONNA HURL...
JT: Damn you Roxx!
GP: Can yah blame him!? Stone is not gonna let go! But Fugite has not given up yet! The ref is not gonna try and raise the hand of Fugite! Stone is telling him to, but the ref won't do it! Stone is getting pissed, but still will not release!! Fugite is not moving! I think he has passed out!
Roxx: Stone releases! Grabs the ref by the shirt, Elimination (Rocker Dropper)! On the ref!! THe ref is out cold! Stone gets up the ref, THROWS HIM OUT OF THE RING NAILING THE CEMENT TRUCK!
JT: Stone is pissed off! He goes over, and picks up Fugite. Fugite with a kick to the gut, JAW BREAKER! Stone falls out of the ring! Phantom gets up Stone, and DRIVES HIS HEAD INTO THE STEEL POLE! Stone falls to the ground. Phantom picks him up, and throws him into the ring.
GP: Phantom now reaches under the ring, and GETS A CASKET! A GOD... .DAMN... .CASKET! HE SLIDES IT IN THE RING! Phantom gets in, and gets Stone. PICK UP... .CHOKE SLAM ON THE CASKET! Stone bounces off, and is kicking in agoney! Phantom picks up Fugite, and drives his head into the edge of the Casket gashing out a huge cut! Phantom opens the casket, and grabs him, Phantom's Crucifix!!! Fugite is out cold!! Phantom picks up Fugite, POWERBOMB INTO THE CASKET! Phantom seals it, and dumps it into the hole in the ring!! Phantom now grabbing a bottle of gasoline under the ring, and is pooring some of it on the casket!! Phantom is lighting a match!!!
JT: IM LEAVING!!!
ROXX: HIDE BEHIND THE GUARD RAIL!!
GP: PHANTOM THROWS IT!
GP: MY GOD!!!!! WHATTA' FLAME!!!!!!!! THE CASKET HAS BEEN SET ON FIRE WITH FUGITE IN IT!!!! PHANTOM IS GONNA KILL FUGITE!! Wait! Stone from behind, CRACK!! A BASEBALL BAT OVER THE HEAD OF PHANTOM! PHANTOM IS OUT COLD!! STONE FALLS TO THE MAT OF FATIGUE! Whatta' extreme title match!! Stone is now getting up, and has a broken piece of a wooden bat in his hand. STICKS UP THE ASS OF PHANTOM!
JT: Stone now picks up Phantom, WITH the bat up his ass, boot, Phantom's Crucifix!!! PHANTOM'S MOVE!! CAMEL CLUTCH!!!! STONE HAS A CAMEL CLUTCH APPLIED ON PHANTOM!! I THINK PHANTOM IS GIVING UP!!!
GP: THERE IS NO REF!!
Roxx: GP IS RIGHT! THERE IS NO REF! PHANTOM IS GIVING UP!!
JT: THIS ISN'T FAIR!!
GP: STONE HAS RELEASED THE HOLD, AND NOWWW A REF COMES DOWN!
JT: Stone grabs em, wait! Phantom with a low blow! NO! DAMNIT! NO!
Roxx: Phantom grabs Stone, sends him into the ropes, BIG BOOT! Phantom now grabbing the bat out of his ass, and RAMMS IT INTO THE NUTS OF JAX STONE!! WELL, WHATEVER WAS THERE! IS NOW GONE! Phantom picks up Stone, TIGER BOMB! 1... ... .2... ..3 NO! THE REF SAYS TWO! PHANTOM LOOKS PISSED! HE'S ARGUING WITH THE REF. Not smart. The ref says it was two! Phantom can't believe it! Stone from behind, BRASS KNUCKS! NAILS PHANTOM!! STONE FELL IN THE PROCESS! AND HIT THE REF AS WELL! THE REF FALLS OUT OF THE RING! THE CASKET HAS BEEN BURNED! STONE HAS KNOCKED OUT PHANTOM, ANNNND THE REF!
GP: WAIT A MINUTE! WAIT A DAMN MINUTE!
JT: WHAT WHAT!?
GP: LOOK! COMING FROM UNDER THE RING, IT'S FUGITE!!!! HE'S BURNT SO BAD!!! HE'S ON THE APRON! AND HAS THE TORCH!! STONE HAS THE CHAIR, AND TURNS IT SIDEWAYS, RAMS IT INTO THE FOREHEAD OF FUGITE!! FUGITE SPRAYED THE TORCH THOUGH!!! STONE CAN'T SEE!! FUGITE HAS A DENT IN HIS FOREHEAD!!! GOOD GOD! PHANTOM TURNS STONE AROUND, Phantom's Crucifix!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NAILED IT!!!!!! COVER!!
JT: NO REF!! HAHAHA!
Roxx: HERE COME'S ONE!!! HE SLIDES INTO THE RING... 1... ..2... ... .3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*DING DING DING!!*
Announcer: THE WINNER OF THIS MATCH, AND NEWWWWWWW IWO EXTREME CHAMPIONNNN... ... ..PPPPPPPPHHHHHHANTOMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!
["Wherever I May Roam" by Metallica blasts through out the arena]
GP: Oh my god, whatta match this was. All three men put there life on the line, to win the Extreme title, but Phantom walks away the winner. The EMT's are coming down to get Fugite, Stone, and Phantom. These 3 men are hurt badly, but gave it there all, and put on a show.
JT: [Weeping] I CAN'T BELIEVE PHANTOM WON!
Roxx: Oh shut up! It was thee most Hardcore match I have seen since being here in the IWO.
GP: Well there has been many of em, and this one is sitting up there with em all. And it happened at HEATSTROKE!
North American Title Match
Capital Punishment -c- v. Tony Davis
GP: Alright folks the next matchup we have on this momentous night. We have for you the North American Title up for grabs between the champion Capital Punishment and the challenger Tony Davis.
JT: NADS! NADS! NADS! NADS!
Roxx: That boys got a good bita skill but then again so does Capital Punishment.
JT: Davis has this wrapped up. Trust me... I wouldn't lie.
Roxx: Yeah this coming from the guy that tried to trick a little kid into thinking Alf was gonna find him and kill him.
JT: Hey the kid believed me! I swear it!
Roxx: Oh yeah! Thats why he laughed at you and kicked you in your jimmy right?
JT: It was out of fear... I swear it!
Roxx: Whatever you say.
GP: Alright guys you've bickered enough. Here comes the challenger to the ring so lets take you to ringside to the announcer at hand.
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen... ... tonights bout is one fall with a thirty minute time limit. And it is for the IWO North American Title! Introducing first... coming to the ring by the sounds of "Degenerate" by Blink182... he stands at 6'6" 274 and a half pounds... ... .TOOOOOOONNNNNNNNYYYYYYY DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS!
::Tony Davis walks out to the ring.::
Announcer: And his opponent... the current IWO North American Champion... .he stands at 6'4" 314 pounds... ..he IS the master of the Death Penalty... ..ladies and gentlemen... ... CAPITAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL PUUUUUUUUUUNIIIIIIIIISHMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENT!
::Capital Punishment walks out to the sound of his theme. He gets into the ring, hands the referee the belt and the two men wait for the bell to ring. It does.::
GP: And here we go folks! The match starts off strong with a tieup that comes out with Capital Punishment on the recieving end as Davis rams his knee into Capitals stomach. He brings this off with a Guillotine type maneuver, better known as a Fame Asser. Davis stands up and picks Punishment up and into a Scoop Slam onto the mat. You can see the pain on Capital Punishments face from that one. Davis immidiately drops to his knees and begins to grind into the side of Cappys head with his knuckle. Right into the temple! Thats gotta stop!
JT: Hehehehehe! I told you so. I told you so! Didn't I?
Roxx: Davis is goin' crazy now. Maybe he should take some sorta pill and calm his ass down.
GP: Now releasing the hold Davis stands up and begins to stomp furiously onto Capital Punishments head. Just pounding away madly! This match is entirely Pro Davis thus far in the bout.
JT: Keep it up Tony! NADS ALL THE WAY BABY!
Roxx: What the hell is Nads anyway?
JT: What? You've never seen the web site for Nads?
Roxx: No actually I haven't.
JT: Oh... .well I'll send you a link some time. Just remind me.
Roxx: I don't know if I wanna know... with a name like Nads.
GP: Enough Nad chat. Capital Punishment has swayed the odds by grabbing on to Tony Davis' boot and pulling him down. He crawls up onto Davis's back and applies an STF like maneuver that looks to be taking some effect.
Roxx: Oh damn thats gotta smart.
JT: Oh sh*t man he's wrenchin' on that guy!
GP: Tony Davis holds on though! He refuses to give in! He's hanging on for dear life here! Capital Punishment releases the hold and rolls off of him. Both men are down! Both men are down!
JT: GET UP NAD MAN! GET UP!
GP: Tony Davis and Capital Punishment have already in this point of the match been incapacitated! Capital Punishment down from the beating inflicted onto him... and Tony Davis from the beat he inflicted on Punishment... plus the STF! The referee has begun a ten count.
Referee: 1... .2... 3...
JT: Get UUUUUUUUUUP!
GP: Tony Davis is begining to show ladies and gentlemen! He's begining to show some form of life now!
JT: YES YES YES!
GP: Capital Punishment is still out of it! Davis is crawling towards Capital Punishment.
Referee: 8... .9...
GP: DAVIS IS ON PUNISHMENT FOR THE PIN!
Referee: 1... ..2... ..NO!
GP: KICK OUT! Punishment will not give in! He's up! He's up! He's up! He's handing out lefts and rights... lefts and rights an upper cut... a, kick to the stomach and a FACE SMASH INTO THE MAT! Capital Punishment is coming back here folks! He's back in charge! He lifts Tony Davis off the mat and up into a PILE DRIVER! Davis is quivering on the mat! Capital Punishment bounces off the ropes and DOWN onto Davis with a springing elbow! Punishment lifts him up and throws him to the corner... runs in with a knee to the side and begins pounding on Davis's face! Now with chops to Davis's chest! He lifts Tony Davis up and onto the top rope and comes off into a Power Bomb! OH MY GOD! This could be it right here... .Capital Punishment goes for the pin!
Referee: 1... ..2... ... .
GP: NO! NO! NO! HE'S STILL IN THIS! TONY DAVIS IS STILL IN THIS!
JT: THANK GOD! WHEW!
GP: Oh man this is one good match. Both men giving their all here for you at home! Capital Punishment staggers to his feet and lifts up Tony Davis, he spins him around and into a Reverse DDT! What a move! Capital Punishment goes for the pin again.
Referee: 1... .2... ..KICK OUT!
GP: NO! Another kick loose! Punishment on his knees beside the fallen Davis whipes away the sweat. It is obvious he's trying to think of his next move. And he's found it! He lifts Davis up and into a Gorilla Press Slam! AND HE THREW HIM INTO THE CROWD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! MY GOD!
JT: NO DAMN IT! NOT NOW! GET UP DAVIS! I'LL KICK YOU IN THE NADS!
Roxx: Hey now isn't this a predicament.
GP: Davis is out cold on some old ladies lap! Capital Punishment is going up top! The old lady and everyone in the audience has moved and PUNISHMENT COMES OFF WITH A KAMIKAZI SPLASH! BOTH MEN ARE OUT ON THE COLD CEMENT FLOOR! WOW! The referee has begun his ten count as both men lie upon the floor unmoving. This is a crazy match. Capital Punishment has pulled out all the stops to try and keep Tony Davis down, and to no evail. Davis doing the same. But neither is successful. Now both men begin to show signs of life as the Referee reaches the five count. Capital Punishment slides into the ring and lays in the middle of the ring. Soon following behind comes Tony Davis. Both men make it into the ring but are on the mat. Another ten count is started now!
Referee: 1... ..2... ... .3... ..4... ..5... ..6... ... ..7... ... ..8... 9
GP: Tony Davis rolls over on top of Capital Punishment!
Referee: 1... .2... ..
GP: KICK OUT!
JT: SON OF A B*TCH! C'MON DAVIS WIN!
GP: Davis is in shock! Both men are down again! Davis makes an attempt to stand... he does it. He goes to the top rope! He comes off with an Elbow Drop! He goes for another pin!
Referee: 1... ..2...
GP: KICK OUT AGAIN!
Roxx: These boys jus' won't quit! I haven't seen anything this bad since ma' last girlfriend got a raging case of PMS. And that was not a pretty sight to see let me tell you!
GP: Davis pulls Capital Punishment up and throws him into the ropes and slams him with a clothesline. And follows up with a leg drop. The pin.
Referee: 1... ..2... ..
GP: Another kick out by Capital Punishment! That Kamikazi dive took it all out of him! He's up now and recieves a kick to the face by Tony Davis. Davis grabs Punishment before he gets the chance to fall! A NECK BREAKER BY DAVIS! The count!
Referee: 1... ..2... ..
GP: KICK FREE AGAIN BY CAPITAL PUNISHMENT! Davis is amazed! He grabs Capital Punishment but is stopped by a Low Blow! Capital Punishment grabs Davis into a DDT! Punishment now with a roll up! He's got the tights! He's got the tights!
Referee: 1... ..2... .
GP: KICK OUT BY DAVIS! MAN... what a match this has turned out to be!
Roxx: Capital Punishment has lifted Tony Davis up again. And both these poor sonsa b*tches look to be in extreme amounts of pain, aswell as fatigued. But Punishment still finds a way to lift Tony Davis up into a Suplex position! BUT WAIT! What the hell?
GP: He's spun Davis's body around while up in the air for the SUplex and drives him down head first into a Pile Driver maneuver! That could've broken Davis's neck! That has got to be it people! THE PIN!
Referee: 1... ... 2... ..3!
GP: NO! DAVIS KICKED OUT AGAIN! DAVIS KICKED OUT AGAIN! NO THREE! NO THREE! THE MATCH CONTINUES!
Roxx: Capital Punishment is poundin' on the mat now! He's gotta be pretty pissed off by this point in the match for sure.
JT: GO NADS! GO NADS! GO NADS!
Roxx: Do you even realize your just chanting gonads?
JT: SHUT UP!
GP: Davis is hurting! He may have gotten free but that doesn't mean he's in any shape to fight. Capital Punishment picks him up and repeats the Suplex/Pile Driver maneuver. And AGAIN he tries to pin Tony Davis!
Referee: 1... ... 2... .
GP: Another foiled attempt at a victory! Tony Davis is in some real trouble here if he doesn't just give in soon!
JT: He's gonna win!
Roxx: oh don't be so stupid! Davis is f*cked any way you look at it here.
JT: YOU JUST WATCH!
GP: Capital Punishment lifts the limp body of Tony Davis up and down into a Powerslam. He stands back up and picks Tony Davis up again, he throws him to the ropes but Davis can't even stand! He just falls to the mat! Capital Punishment pauses not knowing what to do now. He runs over and goes for another friggin pin!
Referee: 1... ..2... ...
GP: And again the will of Tony Davis sticks it out! Capital Punishment gets to his feet flustered! He begins to kick the botton rope and shout out curse words! He is not a happy camper! He lifts Davis up again into a lightning fast Snap Suplex. He lifts him up again and does the Snap Suplex! Yet again now with another Snap Suplex. And one last one in the form of a Fishermans Suplex! The pinning combinantion is hooked!
Referee: 1... ..2... ...
JT: YES! HE KICKED OUT AGAIN! HE KICKED OUT AGAIN!
GP: This is an amazing showing by both men! What a match up this has turned out to be here tonight!
Roxx: I didn't think this'd turn out to be so damned good! I was all ready to take a damn nap and now I'm on the edge of ma'seat!
GP: Capital Punishment stands again and leans against a turnbuckle looking at Tony Davis who is out cold, not moving on the mat. I don't think Capital Punishment knows what else to do here really. Wait... he lifts Tony Davis up... ... .BAM! HE NAILED HIM WITH THE DEATH PENALTY! THATS IT FOLKS!
Referee: 1... ... ..2... ... .
JT: WHOA MAMA! I almost had a heart attack on that one!
Roxx: I can't believe this! He kicked out again! Neither man will give this up! Capital Punishment now with another Fishermans Suplex. BUT NO! DAVIS HAS SOME SORT OF WEAPON! BRASS KNUCKS! HE'S GOT KNUCKS! SLAM! HE NAILED CAPITAL PUNISHMENT WITH THEM! HE'S ROLLED HIM UP!
Referee: 1... ... .2... ... ... 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*DING DING DING*
GP: OH MY GOD! WE HAVE AN UPSET HERE! AN UPSET!
Announcer: Here is your winner... ..AND NEW IWO NORTH AMERICAN CHAMPION! TONY DAAAAAAAAAAAAVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS!
JT: I TOLD YOU ROXX! I TOLD YOU DAMN IT! I WAS RIGHT! NADS FOREVER!
GP: Wait... Co VP John is coming out to ringside. Whats going on?
CO VP John: Alright Davis... I saw how you pulled that one off... .and you may have your day right now... but Capital Punishment... .WILL be getting a rematch. It could happen... any time... .any place... .all depends on when the mood hits me and Jamie. But rest assured that he will be getting another shot at your ass in the future.
GP: CO VP John walks away as Tony Davis takes his title in hand and begins mocking Capital Punishment! Whata match folks! I can't wait to see whatelse is on the bill tonight!
Special Guest Ref: Titan
If John wins, he can no longer be called anything other than Co-VP John. If Jamie wins, John is fired.
President Jamie v. CSMFBSFFVP John
Roxx: It all comes down to this!!
JT: 2 months plus of these two Executives at each other's throats... we've seen Jello dumped on the President, RIBS and Barbaque sauce dumped on the VP, numerous names being called... .
GP: All culminated into this one match where Cock sucking mother f*cking baby stealing f*ck face Vice Prez (CSMFBSFFVP) John will take on President Jamie... .putting everything he has on the line!!
("It's All About the Pentiums" by 'Weird' Al Yankovich plays as Jamie comes out to ringside. He has a mic.)
Jamie- This is it folks... .finally, we get rid of all the loose ends here in the IWO! The major flaws in the Board have been taken care of up to this point... now tonight I get rid of the biggest flaw of all!! Get that CSMFBSFFVP out here!!
('One' by Creed plays as CSMF... get the point? VP John walks out with Titan by his side. He also has a mic.)
John- I'm going to make short work of you you f*cking bastard! When I'm done with you, the IWO will be MY fed once again!!
Jamie- Oh, one things for sure... .someone is going to be made short work of. Get in here!!
GP- The bell has rung!! Titan is clearly on John's side in this case. Jamie is just grinning at John... ..Titan is standing next to the CSMF... the VP, guarding his man. The two executives and competetors circle each other... they lock up... .TITAN NAILS JOHN WITH A FORARM TO THE BACK?!?! TITAN... WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING?!! TITAN PICKS UP CSTOOLONGTOPRONOUNCE VP JOHN... ..GORILLA PRESS!!! SETS HIM UP?!?! TITAN X-PRESS!!! TITAN COVERS HIM!!!?? JAMIES COUNTS?! 1... .2... .3!!!
Roxx- WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED?
Jamie- HAHAHAHAHA!! Ladies and Gentlemen, your NEW Vice President of the IWO... ..Titan!!!
Titan- That's right folks... .this last beating you just saw on CSDAMMITIHATETHISNAME VP John was my last match in the IWO... I've offically retired to settle back behind the desk, firing... .er... .ordering around all the little tykes they call main eventers here in the IWO! So everybody get back to work!!!
(Jamie and Titan leave to the back as John is carried away on a stretcher... .never to be seen again as IWO VP.)
GP- I... .I don't know what to say.
Roxx- Titan as VP?! The IWO is gonna be fun now!!
JT- How long has this been planned?!
GP- Who knows... ..what we do know is that we've got one more match set to get, live via satalliete... ..Mall Brawl III, the most anticipated World Title match in the history of the IWO!!
Mall Brawl III
World Title Match
Falls count anywhere in the Mall of America in Bloomington, Minnesota.
Elimination style match
Only ONE man can survive...
?¿? -c- v. Joey Rappoport v. Phelen Kell v. Dane Wilt v.Raging One v. Chris
Anthony v. Ken War v. KC Kid v. Justin Shack v. Mad Max v. Zombie
GP - Well... This is it fans. The Main Event for Heatstroke... We've been
waiting all night for this thing to take place. Luckily we are still here
inside the arena. Our monitors are set up to view everything that you folks
at home do. So... Don't worry about our safety. We aren't in the path of
JT - They could come here you know.
GP - Actually no they couldn't JT. They've all been LOCKED inside the Mall
of America. There is NO way in OUR out... Only one man will walk away... And
a few customers that didn't know about our little match and got locked in by
Roxx - Boy.. I bet they are up a shit creek without a paddle.
JT - What exactly is a shit creek?
Roxx - A creek with shit in it.
JT - Oh.. ok
GP - Fans... If you feel sorry for me for sitting with these two tonight...
Then thank you.
JT - What is wrong with us?
GP - It isn't that hard to figure out JT.
Roxx - Is he ALWAYS this mean?
JT - Yes...
GP - Well fans... Earlier today the MAYOR of Minneapolis... Bessie "The
Flabby" Fatasstura gave IWO President Jamie Kosoy the key to the city...
With the key Jamie got two really nice shirts at the local wal-mart.
JT - I wish I could afford Wal-Mart clothes.
Roxx - I wish I could afford clothes at all...
(Camera pans down on Roxx's bare ass.)
GP - *sigh*
JT - Nikki usually does that.. I MISS HER!!!
GP - We all do JT...
Roxx - I can be your Nikki.
JT - You don't have breasts.
Roxx - But I have a penis.
JT - So do I...
GP - STOP!!!
Roxx - Why do you not have a penis?
GP - YES!!!
JT - I don't think he does!!!
Roxx - Me either!!!
Roxx & JT - PENIS CHECK!!!
(They proceed to punch GP in the groin. He doubles over in pain.)
JT - Hey... I'm being told by Greg's headset that we are to go to the MALL
Roxx - LETS GO!!!
(The cameras cut to the mall. We see a LARGE platform where Monday Night
Meltdown ring announcer Busta Hymen is standing. He apparently is going to
bring out the participants for the match.)
Busta Hymen - YO YO YO!!! Sup Minnesota!!! Busta in DA HOUSE!!!
(The crowd of... .. 2 cheers... It seems that all the fans were locked out of
the MALL.. A few shoppers still remain, having no clue what is going on.)
Busta Hymen - Imma jus gonna call out da names here on my lil' sheet o
paper. They ain't be in any orda so you don't be thinkin' dats how dis shit
gonna go down... Now... First off...
(A picture of Joey Rappoport is shown.)
Busta Hymen - Dis here bea a two time... two time... two time... two time..
two time CHAMPEEN... He is the MASTA of The Kamikaze Kick... He stands six
foot three... He weighs in at two hundred and thirty eight pounds... He is
(A picture of Phelen Kell is shown.)
Busta Hymen - He is a former WORLD CHAMPION... He stands six foot two... He
weighs in at two hundred and fifty five pounds... He is PHELEN KELL!!! THE
(A picture of Dane Wilt is shown.)
Busta Hymen - Genetic Perfection!!! six foot two!!! two hundred and fifty
five pounds... DANE WILT!!!
(A picture of The Raging One is shown.)
Busta Hymen - 290... 6'1"... THE RAGING ONE!!!
(A picture of Chris Anthony is shown.)
Busta Hymen - 235... 6'2"... CHRIS ANTHONY!!!
(A picture of Ken War is shown.)
Busta Hymen - 6'5"... 270... KEN WAR!!!
(A picture of Kansas City Kid is shown.)
Busta Hymen - I'm get tired!!! 6'4"... 245... .
(A picture of Justin Shack is shown.)
Busta Hymen - 6'1"... 247.. JUSTIN SHACK!!!
(A picture of Mad Max is shown.)
Busta Hymen - One crazy MOFO... MAD MAX!!!
(A picture of Zombie is shown.)
Busta Hymen - YOU ALL KNOW THIS GUY... ZOMBIE!!!
(A picture of ?¿? is shown.)
Busta Hymen - And the CHAMP... ?¿?!!!
(The scene cuts back to the announcers' table.)
GP - Well... now that Im not holding my groin... We are about to start off
this damn long ass match.
GP - I know you people at home really have no idea what's going on here. You
don't know the lay out of the stores here... Well... to be honest I really
don't know either. We've been handed a map showing us the lay out of the
place.. It looks interesting.
JT - Three stories of sheer Terror in my opinion.
Roxx - Terror my ass... I mean look at all these good stores. And all the
food places. They shouldn't be messing up a place like this.
GP - Well... I don't think they care about the stores at this time Teddy.
Well... Lets tell you where everyone is starting out... They all drew stores
to see where they were starting... I think we are going to show you what
happened at that drawing earlier in the evening...
(The tape starts. We see the same stage that Busta Hymen was on. We see some
IWO dude with a hat. All the guys in the match are there. The first one to
draw from the hat is the World Champion himself ?¿?. He reaches into the old
hat and pulls out a piece of paper... It reads... "Food Court"... The scene
cuts back to GP, JT, and Teddy Roxx.)
GP - Well... you get the idea. Lets just TELL you where everyone is located.
JT - Works for me.
GP - ?¿?... The Food Court... Kansas City Kid... The Food Court... Joey
Rappoport... Sears... Phelen Kell... Sears... Zombie... Target... Justin
Shack... Target... Ken War... Blockbuster Music... Mad Max... Spencers...
Chris Anthony... A damn bookstore... The Raging One... Blockbuster VIDEO...
Dane Wilt... Footlocker...
Roxx - Now breath Greg... And just how the HELL are we going to keep up with
all this action?
JT - Well Teddy... Only a few guys are in the same place. And the ones that
are in the same area aren't really that close together. They have to
actually FIND each other.
GP - And eleven guys means that someone will be the odd man out...
JT - Who will that be?
GP - I DONT KNOW!!! IT COULD BE ANYONE AT ANYTIME!!!
JT - I think I get it...
(The scene cuts to the Mall. We see ?¿? and The Kansas City Kid. They
apparently have Walkie-talkies!?!?)
GP - This looks interesting.
Roxx - They are in the same stable.
JT - You are right!!!
(The Kansas City Kid and ?¿? are now talking to each other VIA the
Walkie-Talkies... We are trying to listen to what they are saying but our
cameras aren't close enough YET.)
GP - Well.. I'm being told that the match is about to start!!!
(A loud ass bell is heard.)
*INSERT BIG ASS DING HERE*
(We see ?¿? walking towards K.C. Kid in the food court away. They still have
walkie-talkies in hand. Just before they get in face to face distance, we
hear something from the walkie-talkie on ?¿?'s end. It is The Kansas City
Kid saying, "Are you sure you want to do this."... ?¿? says, "YES, I'm sure"
back... They finally get face to face... ?¿? LAYS DOWN!?!?!?!?!? A REF IS
NEAR BY!!! HE SEES THIS!!! K.C. KID COVERS HIM!!!!! 1... 2... .3!!! IT IS
OVER!!! ?¿? IS OUT!!! THERE WILL BE A NEW CHAMPION CROWNED!!! ?¿? gets up.
He shakes The Kansas City Kid's hand... And walks away!?!?!? HE WALKS
AWAY!!! he is walking CALMLY... SLOWLY... right out of the MALL!!!! The
security guards open the door for him... HE IS LEAVING!!! THE CAMERAS ARE
STILL ON HIM!!!! HE IS WALKING INTO THE SUNSET!!!!! IT IS OVER!!!! THE
DYNASTY IN THE IWO IS OVER!!!!! THREE DYNASTIES END IN ONE NIGHT!!! AMAZING!!!)
GP - THIS IS UNREAL!!! IT IS OVER!!! The Mysterious One has just WALKED out
of this match!!! We will have a new champion guaranteed tonight!!!
JT - He chickened out!!! He knew he couldn't win this thing and now he is
walking away!!! What a wuss!!!
Roxx - Well atleast I don't have to say Question Mark, Upside Down Question
Mark, Question Mark for the rest of the night.
GP - What were the chances of both Titan and ?¿? walking away from the
business in the same night!?! This is totally unbelievable.
JT - They were just SO much like each other. They are the two bests at what
Roxx - AWWWW... This is getting me all teary eyed.
The Kansas City Kid is still watching ?¿? walk off even though he really
can't see him anymore... WAIT!!! From behind!!! It is Dane Wilt!!! He
apparently RAN from Footlocker to get to the Food Court!!! He has what
appears to be a golfing show in his hand with METAL SPIKES!!! KC Kid doesn't
see this... Dane Wilt clobbers KC Kid in the back with the shoe. He goes
down... falling over a table in the food court area. Dane Wilt is now
belting him in the face with the golf shoe from footlocker.
GP - The Kansas City Kid turned his back on the action for a split second
and now look what's happening to him.
JT - It is his own fault Greg. He deserves this.
Dane Wilt drops the golfing shoe and pulls KC Kid up. He throws KC Kid over
the counter at Taco Bell. Wilt goes over as well... Wilt pulls KC Kid up and
lays him on the counter... He is going after the taco shit!!! He grabs a
handful of meat... He tosses it down on the face of KC Kid... Now theres the
lettuce, tomatos... Cheese... WAIT!!! He is going to the back... He returns
with... OH MY GOD!!! A big ass container of FIRE SAUCE!!! HE RIPS IT OPEN!!!
AND POURS IT ON THE FACE OF KC KID!!!! The Kansas City Kid is screaming out
in pain clenching his face as the fire sauce eats away at his skin. Dane
Wilt is laughing. He shoves KC Kid off the counter and to the floor of the
Roxx - I guess I'll take a supreme Kansas City Taco... HAHAHHA!!!
JT - HAHAHHA!!!
GP - This is sick!!!
*cut to sears*
We see that Joey Rappoport and Phelen Kell have found each other near the
lawnmowers. They are brawling. Some of the poor customers that have no clue
what is going on are screaming. Rappoport trips over the new John Deere push
mower and falls to the floor. Kell is looking around. He runs over to the
salesclerk and grabs him by the throat.
Phelen Kell - I WANT THE DAMN KEYS!!!
Salesclerk - TO WHAT!?!?!?
Phelen Kell - THAT DAMN BIG ASS RIDING LAWNMOWER OVER THERE!!!
The salesclerk reaches in his pocket and pulls out some keys. He hands them
to Kell. Kell shoves him down and goes back to the lawnmower. He walks by
Rappoport and starts kicking him. He stops and gets on that big ass damn
riding lawn mower. He starts it up... . HE PUTS THE BLADES ON!!! HE IS
DRIVING RIGHT FOR JOEY RAPPOPORT!!!
JT - I didn't know that Joey Rappoport was considered grass.
GP - sigh... STOP THIS!!! HE COULD KILL HIM!!!
Roxx - Atleast cut him up pretty badly.
WAIT!!!! WHATS THAT!!!! OH MY GOD!!!! Apparently one of the other wrestlers
have made their way to the pet shop!!!!! A pretty little fluffy kitty comes
running by and... MEOW!!!!!! SPLAT!!!! CHOP!!!!!!! SLICE!!!!!!! DEATH... .
GP - OH... .
JT - MY... ..
Roxx - DINNER!!!
The lawnmower appears to be jammed with kitty fur and has stopped. Lucky for
Joey Rappoport. Phelen Kell gets off the lawnmower and goes over to
Rappoport. He pulls him up and rams his head against the lawnmower.
Rappoport falls into the kitty guts and chunks. Phelen Kell heads out of Sears.
GP - I'm going to be sick.
*cut to Spencers*
Mad Max is looking around at the... NUDEY CARDS!!! He is laughing. He pulls
out a card and holds it up to the camera.
Mad Max - I think I'm going to get this one for BAT.
The card reads... "Need a good Blow in your life" (with a naked man on the
front of the card in a bikini.).. You open the card up and a gust of wind
blows at you. Sigh... ... Mad Max is laughing. He has a shopping bag and
appears to have no idea that a match is taking place.
*cut to Blockbuster MUSIC*
The Raging One has made his over from Blockbuster VIDEO and found Ken War.
They are brawling. The Raging One slings Ken War into some Kenny Rogers
tapes. They are destroyed... thank god... War is down in the pile o kenny
rogers. The Raging One is looking around. He grabs a life sized poster of
Ricky Martin!!! He lays it on top of War and yells out...
The Raging One - KEN WAR IS HAVING SEX WITH RICKY MARTIN!!!
The few people that are in the store look and laugh.
Zombie and Justin Shack have found each other. They are brawling of course
through the women's clothing area. Zombie grabs one of those damn big ass
bras fat whores wear. He smacks Shack in the head with it. Shack stumbles
back and falls into a crate of panties. Zombie dives in and starts punching
away on Shack. WAIT!!!!!!!!! HERE COMES CHRIS ANTHONY FROM THE BOOK
STORE!!!! He has a HUGE ASS NOVEL IN HIS HAND!!! He nails Zombie in the back
of the head with it. He rolls Zombie out of the women's panties and... HE
STARTS BEATING ON JUSTIN SHACK!!!
GP - Apparently Chris Anthony is going to go after everyone here in this match.
JT - This is funny!!! I love this kind of match!!!
Roxx - We all do...
Chris Anthony is sending that novel into Justin Shack's head repeatedly...
Stephen King never looked so good... Zombie is getting up. He looks and sees
whats going on. He shakes his head and heads out of Target.
*cut to the food court*
Dane Wilt is apparently taking some time out to eat dinner. The Kansas City
Kid is lying motionless on the floor of the food court covered in taco shit.
Dane Wilt meanwhile is eating a Big Mac. WAIT!!! HERE COMES PHELEN KELL!!!
HE SITS DOWN WITH DANE WILT!!!!!
JT - I was wondering why Dane had an extra burger there. I was hoping he was
going to bring it to me.
Kell starts eating as well!!!
GP - THEY SHOULD BE GOING FOR THE WORLD TITLE DAMN IT!!!
*cut to Sears*
Joey Rappoport is slowly getting up. He is covered in cat guts. He starts
screaming as he realizes whats on him. He goes running out of Sears. Our
camera is following him. He heads to the restrooms!!! He goes to the sink
and starts washing himself. He keeps screaming...
Joey Rappoport - I CANT GET THE BLOOD OF THE PUSSY OFF OF ME!!!
*back to Spencers*
Mad Max is now looking at the poster of semi-nude women. He looks to be
enjoying himself... Still shopping away. He looks up on the top shelf and
grabs a LAVA lamp!?! He puts it into his shopping bag and laughs.
GP - What is he up to guys?
JT - Who knows...
*back to Target*
The brawl between Anthony and Shack has moved from the Women's panties..
They are now headed out of Target and into the heart of the mall. Both
taking swings at each other. Shack grabs Anthony and rams him into the wall
of the mall. It seems to have no affect on Anthony as Anthony grabs Shack
and does the same thing to him. It is just back and forth between these
two... They've now made it out to the center of the mall. The big ass
fountain in the middle of the mall... The rushing away makes us all deaf.
They brawl past the fountain and into what appears to be a lingerie shop.
Some FINE ASS BIG BREASTED WHORES are shopping in there.
GP - Why didn't these people get out of the mall BEFORE they locked the doors?
Roxx - They are idiots.
They brawl into the shop... The FINE ASS BIG BREASTED WHORES don't even
notice Anthony and Shack. War slams Anthony into a rack with some bras on
it. Anthony goes down. Shack is looking around for something to use. One of
the FINE ASS BIG BREASTED WHORES hands Justin Shack a bra.
FINE ASS BIG BREASTED WHORE - Hey... We understand how it is nowadays...
This is in your size I believe...
Justin Shack looks PISSED that the FINE ASS BIG BREASTED WHORE would offer
him a bra... He grabs her and KISSES HER!!! She screams and slaps Shack!!!
It sends Shack back a bit... WAIT!!!! A BIG BREASTED WHORE SUPERKICK!!! SHE
KNOWS KARATE!!!! Shack is down with a bloody nose form the FINE ASS BIG
BREASTED WHORE... She walks out of the store, big breasts and all.
GP - See... The customers can affect the outcome of this match. EVERYONE
should be out of here damn it!!!
JT - Well most of them are Greg!!!
GP - BUT NOT ALL OF THEM!!!
Roxx - Calm down Greggy.. This isn't the end of the world just a little
GP - BUT HOW CAN IT BE FAIR!!!
JT - LIFE ISNT FAIR ASS!!!
*cut back to Mad Max.*
Mad Max is now headed into another gift shop. He sees a great big teddy bear
and rushes to hold it. He embraces it when the store manager yells at him
for touching the merchandise.
Where is everyone?
The Food Court - Dane Wilt, Phelen Kell, And The Kansas City Kid
Bathroom - Joey Rappoport
Lingerie Store - Chris Anthony and Justin Shack
Blockbuster MUSIC - Ken War and The Raging One
??? - Zombie
GP - Mad Max has lost his mind as he continues to look for real GIFTS!!!
JT - It is almost Christmas time!!!
Roxx - Yeah... 4 MONTHS AWAY!!! HO HO HO!!! MERRY HEATSTROKE!!!
We see Zombie walking through the mall. He apparently is just looking around
for something to use. He stumbles across the golf pro shop. He goes
inside... NO!!! THE BEVERLY HILLS BRUISERS!!!!! THEY ARE THERE!!!!! THEY SEE
ZOMBIE AND START ATTACKING HIM!!!!! They are beating him over the head with
golf clubs!!!! MALL Security and IWO officials storm the golf shop and pull
The Beverly Hills Bruisers out.
GP - THEY ARENT SUPPOSED TO BE THERE!!! NO INTERFERENCES IN THIS MATCH!!!
JT - Well... Zombie just found out that was wrong didn't he?
Roxx - heh..
Zombie is down. His head is busted open from the pitching wedge.
*cut to Blockbuster MUSIC*
The place is a mess. The Raging One and Ken War have torn it up. A few CDs
remain unbroken. The Raging One is down. Ken War grabs him and... NO!!! HE
PUTS SOME HEAD PHONES ON HIM... AND... NO!!!!
GP - THIS IS SICK!!!!
HE IS MAKING THE RAGING ONE LISTEN TO... RAP MUSIC!!!!! OH MY GOD NO!!!!
THIS IS HORRIBLE!!!!!! The Raging One is going crazy listening to it!!! He
can't take it anymore. He screams out in pain as Master P blasts into The
Raging One's ears... The Raging One rips the head phones off. His ears
appear to be all bloody from the rap. Ken War grabs The Raging One and they
head out of Blockbuster MUSIC.
JT - I'm surprised that The Raging One is able to stand after that move... I
mean THE RAP to the EARS is just horrible.
Roxx - I know what you mean.
*The food court*
Dane Wilt and Phelen Kell are finishing up their dinner. KC Kid is still
down holding his face as the FIRE sauce from Taco Bell still eats away at
him. Wilt and Kell get up. They go over to the Kansas City Kid... THEY GRAB
HIM!!!!! NO!!!!!! IT CANT BE!!!! NOT IN THE FOOD COURT!!!! THE NEW AND
IMPROVED CIRCLE OF DESTRUCTION!!!! ONTO A TABLE!!!! 1... 2... .3!!!
Eliminated #2 - KC Kid
GP - Guys... It is just down to 9 men... 9 men... Only ONE will walk away
the IWO World Champ. Who do you think will win this thing now?
JT - Now that ol' Question Marky is gone... I don't really know. I like
Zombie a lot. He could win it... but then again I like Mad Max too.
Roxx - You both are wrong... You know good and well that I.. Teddy Roxx will
be the IWO World Champion.
GP - You aren't even in the damn match.
Roxx - IN MY MIND I AM and I'VE ALREADY WON!!!
JT - You have a mind!?!
Phelen Kell and Dane Wilt are now headed out of the food court and are
DOWNstairs. They are going down the escalator... NO!!!! LOOK!!!! It appears
to be someone RUNNING UP THE DOWN ESCALATORS!!!! It is Joey Rappoport!!!! HE
MAKES IT TO WHERE KELL IS!!!! HE SPEARS KELL ON THE ESCALATOR!!!! He is
still screaming about the kitty blood. He starts beating the SHIT out of
Kell. Dane Wilt pulls him off and tries to calm him down... NO!!! Rappoport
punches Wilt!!!! He has gone CRAZY... AGAIN!!! He continues running up the
escalator... Past everyone... He is the ONLY ONE on the top level... He is
Joey Rappoport - WASH THE BLOOD AWAY!!!! WASH THE BLOOD AWAY!!! KITTY BLOOD!!!
He is to the center of the mall.. He sees the BIG ASS fountain... HE GETS ON
GP - STOP HIM!!!!!!!!!
JT - OH MY GOD!!!
HE LEAPS DOWN INTO THE FOUNTAIN!!!! HE YELLS AS HE IS FALLING DOWN... HE
LANDS ON A STATUE OF A BOY PISSING... He slides off the statue and falls
into the water. The little statue boy is now pissing on Rappoport. Blood is
now flowing into the fountain from Rappoport. Everyone is in total shock
after what just happened. The match has come to a stand still...
Eliminated #3 - Joey Rappoport
GP - Well... As you can probably tell... Joey Rappoport isn't going to be
able to continue in this match. This is sick. I dont' know why we even
showed that. We knew that Rappoport is a sick man. But why did Phelen Kell
have to do what he did earlier!!!
JT - IT ISNT KELL'S FAULT!!! IT IS THAT DAMN PUSSIES FAULT!!!
Where are they now?
Eliminated - ?¿?, KC Kid, and Joey Rappoport
Walking around somewhere in the mall - Dane Wilt and Phelen Kell and Ken War
and The Raging One and Mad Max
Lingerie Store - Chris Anthony and Justin Shack
Golf Shop - Zombie
GP - Joey Rappoport is now being helped out of the fountain where he made
his suicide dive... Luckily he is OK... He just has a broken back, ribs, and
whiplash. He can't continue the match.
Rappoport is being strecthered out.
*To the lingerie shop*
We see that Chris Anthony has put a pair of panties on Justin Shack's head.
Shack can't see to walk anywhere, blinded by the panties. Anthony directs
Shack to the changing room. Shack walks in with the panties on his head and
women start screaming!!! They all come running out... Atleast it seems that
way. We go in to see what is going on... Anthony follows and... and... A BIG
FAT ASS THREE HUNDRED POUND WHALE WHORE IS KISSING JUSTIN SHACK!!! He
doesn't know what is kissing him!!! Apparently he thinks it is some sexy BIG
BREASTED ASS WHORE!!! Anthony is snickering in the corner watching along
with us The BIG FAT ASS THREE HUNDRED POUND WHALE WHORE stops kissing
Shack... Anthony walks up behind Shack and removes the panties from his
head. Shack sees the BIG FAT ASS THREE HUNDRED POUND WHALE WHORE and
screams!!! He runs out of the lingerie shop!!! Just then the BIG FAT ASS
THREE HUNDRED POUND WHALE WHORE licks her lips and blows a kiss at Anthony.
Anthony follows Shack, running out of the store.
*to the golf shop*
Zombie is slowly getting up. The cut on his face has more blood on it. He
realizes what has happened. He is pissed. He starts marching off after Dane
Wilt. He wants some answers!!!
GP - And this HORROR fest continues here fans at Heatstroke. What a way to
end the evening.
JT - And we aren't even close to being over!!!
*to The DISNEY store*
Mad Max's shopping bag is now FULL of stuff. He has what appears to be a
POOH BEAR doll in his hand. He shoves it into the shopping bag. He goes over
to the shirts now. He sees a nice Snow White t-shirt. He grabs it, finds an
x-tra large and puts it on. He is so happy now.
Roxx - My god what a nut case.
GP - Does he even have a clue what's going on here?
JT - I doubt it... but that could work for his advantage later on.
The Raging One and Ken War have made their way over near the elevator. The
doors open and... DANE WILT AND PHELEN KELL WALK OUT!!!! They go after The
Raging One and War. They sling them into the elevator. They go inside and
hit the stop button. The door is closed... We don't know what the hell is
going on... The door opens back up and we see Kell and Wilt walk out... No
sign of The Raging One and Ken War. The elevator starts going down... The
camera on the bottom floor of the mall catches the elevator... The same BIG
BREASTED WHORE we saw kick Justin Shack is standing... waiting for the
elevator... It opens up... and... and... HAHAHHA!!!
GP - CLOSE MY EYES!!! OH SICK!!!
Dane Wilt and Phelen Kell STRIPPED Ken War and The Raging One of their
clothes!!! THEY ARE BUCK NAKED... The BIG ASS BREASTED WHORE looks pissed...
She walks off as if she is going to get someone... War and The Raging One
come to... They look at each other... not knowing what has happened... AND
LOOK AT THAT!!! GET A CLOSE UP!!!! Hostile Youth put a few beer bottles in
the elevator with them... . AND WHATS THAT?!?!?!?! The Raging One is wearing
lipstick!??!?! KEN WAR LOOKS DOWN AT HIS PENIS!!!! IT HAS LIPSTICK ON IT!!!!
HOSTILE YOUTH HAS MADE IT APPEAR THAT THEY'VE HAD SEX WITH EACH OTHER!!!!
GP - I draw the line... This is too much.
JT - I just want to know how the hell did Dane Wilt and Phelen Kell do all
that in that short amount of time they had.
Roxx - And I want to know where the hell their clothes are!!!
The cameras pan up to where Kell and Wilt are standing. They throw War's and
The Raging One's clothes down to them. They are laughing the whole time.
Shack is throwing up in the fountain after kissing the big fat ass beached
whale of a whore. ZOMBIE!!!! ZOMBIE!!!!! He is right behind Shack... Shack
doesn't know it!!! And Zombie.. He has... what appears to be a putter from
the golf shop!!!! He hits Shack in the back with the putter!!! Shack goes
down!!! He doesn't even know what hit him... AND TURN THE CAMERAS AWAY!!!!
HE JUST... .
GP - OK... i've seen enough damn it!!! Stop this or something!!!!!! MY
JT - What!?!? HE JUST RAMMED THE PUTTER UP SHACK'S ASS!!!
Roxx - This is actually pretty wild... I love it!!!
Zombie pulls the putter back out... .. Shack is down. Zombie walks away...
Enter Chris Anthony. He sees that Shack is down. He goes over and pulls
Shack up... He sets him up... CA'S WILD RIDE!!!! He goes for the pin... from
out of nowhere a refree shows up!!! 1... 2... 3.!!!
Eliminated #4 - Justin Shack
GP - After having a putter shoved up his ass I think he did pretty damn good.
JT - I think I'd rather have a putter up my ass than be kissed by a big fat
ass whale like that.
Roxx - That woman did has a fat ass.
GP - We have SEVEN men left... Lets see who they are...
JT - Ken War.. The Raging One.. Zombie.. Dane Wilt.. Phelen Kell.. Chris
Anthony.. and Mad Max.
Roxx - Very good JT...
JT - heh
Dane Wilt and Phelen Kell are still walking together. Zombie is hot on their
trail though. Ken War and The Raging One are trying to get dressed... Mad
Max is... well.. being Mad Max... And Chris Anthony is now on Zombie's trail!!!
GP - Things are about to heat up guys.
Ken War and The Raging One are dressed now. They are sickened to look at
each other... HERE COMES ZOMBIE!!! He has that putter... He swings... The
Raging One ducks... KEN WAR nails ZOMBIE with a clothesline... Zombie drops
the putter but doesn't go down. The Raging One picks up the putter. He
swings it at Zombie... NO!!! HE HITS WAR!!! HE STARTS BEATING ON WAR!!!
Zombie looks disgusted... He just walks away from them to continue after
Dane Wilt and Phelen Kell.
JT - Looks like The Raging One is going to give Ken War the second putter up
the ass tonight!!!
CHRIS ANTHONY is there!!! The Raging One swings at him... He misses...
Anthony KICKS HIM IN THE NUTS!!! The Raging One drops the club!!! The Raging
One goes down to his knees. Anthony grabs the club and smacks The Raging One
across the face with it. He falls down right next to Ken War. Anthony and
the club go after Zombie...
Roxx - I don't think these two are going to be able to continue...
Mad Max is now in Blockbuster MUSIC trying to sort through all the mess. He
shakes his head. He can't believe what has happened. He looks down and
sees... . and sees... the broken CDs... He picks one up... It is.. HIS
FAVORITE CD IN ALL THE LAND!!!! SHANIA TWAIN!!! HE SEES that it is broken.
He gets all pissed. But before he does... he sings...
Mad Max - THAT DONT IMPRESS ME MUCH!!!
He storms off... Apparently after the people that broke this CD.
GP - Maybe this will make Max get into this match.
JT - Who really knows about Max?
Zombie thinks he has cornered Dane Wilt and Phelen Kell. They disappeared
into a racing store... Zombie is standing outside waiting for them to come
out... NO!!!!! HERE THEY COME!!!! THEY ARE IN... MINATURE RACE CARS!!!! THEY
ARE DRIVING RIGHT AT ZOMBIE!!! Zombie moves out of the way. They are going
to run people over!!!
Roxx - HAHAHAHA!!!
Zombie runs into the store... He looks around. He hops into a minature #24
Jeff Gordon car and takes off. He is headed after Kell and Wilt!!!
JT - WHY DID HE PICK A GAY CAR?!?!
Roxx - I guess he is a RAINBOW WARRIOR.
Wilt, Kell, and Zombie go flying past Chris Anthony. Anthony wonders just
what the hell is going on. They go flying past the fallen Ken War and The
Raging One. Zombie is in hot pursuit. He starts pulling golf balls from his
trunks, apparently he got those in the golf store. He is throwing them at
Kell and Wilt as they continue to speed through the mall.
GP - Total chaos... That's the best way to describe this.
JT - I LOVE IT!!! GOLF BALLS EVERYWHERE!!!
Zombie is STILL throwing golf balls. They are hitting Kell and Wilt in the
back but it doesn't seem to bother them... WAIT!!! WILT SLAMS ON HIS
BRAKES!!! ZOMBIE DOESNT SEE IT!!! HE FINALLY DOES!!! IT IS TOO LATE!!! HE
GOES CRASHING INTO THE BACK OF WILT'S CAR... . WILT GOES FLYING OUT AND LANDS
FACE FIRST ON THE MALL FLOOR... Zombie's neck jerks back... Phelen Kell
immediately stops and gets out of his car. He goes over to look at his
fallen partner, Dane Wilt. He is yelling for help. He looks over at Zombie.
Phelen Kell - YOU DID THIS TO HIM YOU SON OF A BITCH...
Kell runs at Zombie... Zombie isn't moving either. Kell just doesn't care.
He pulls Zombie up out of his car and slings him to the floor. He picks the
#24 car up and drops it on Zombie!!! Zombie is out!!! Kell is going back
over to Wilt. He is still yelling for some help.
GP - We've had a major wreck. This isn't good... Especially here inside the
mall of America.
JT - There aren't any traffic lights. What do you expect when it comes to
something like this!?!?
Roxx - They both are hurt.
Chris Anthony comes driving up in another little race car. He ISNT
STOPPING!!! HE IS HEADED RIGHT FOR KELL!!! AND HE HITS HIM!!! KELL GOES
FLYING UP IN THE AIR AND LANDS ON TOP OF WILT!!!!! THE REF IS COUNTING!!!!
1... .2... ..3!!!
Eliminated #5 - Dane Wilt
GP - HE PINNED HIS OWN PARTNER!!!
JT - But he didn't know about it Greg. He is out cold thanks to Chris
Anthony and his little car.
Roxx - Just think guys... Anthony has a hell of a chance here. The two big
guys... Zombie and Kell are out cold. All he has to do is pin them.. Then go
back and pin War and The Raging One who are already out... He has the match
in the bag!!!
JT - What about Mad Max!?!
Roxx - He is probably lost by now.
Chris Anthony gets out of his car and heads over to Kell. He pulls Kell
up... He puts him in a car... He is looking around... He goes over and grabs
a big ass tree in a pot... He turns the car so that it is facing straight..
all the way down the mall walkway... He sets the pot on the gas... KELL IS
OUT!! THE CAR TAKES OFF AT FULL SPEED!!! THE POT IS ON THE GAS MAKING IT
GO!!! Anthony is laughing as Phelen Kell goes speeding to his sure demise.
KELLS CAR IS GOING TO THE RIGHT!!! IT SMACKS INTO A STORE!!!! NO!!! HE GOES
FLYING THROUGH THE GLASS OF THE WINDOW OF THE STORE!!!! THE CAR IS STOPPED
BY... . By... . A GRAND PIANO!!! The tree in the pot goes flying out of the
car... The owner of the piano shop comes running out. Kell is out...
GP - This is sad... Three guys are seriously injured now...
JT - And we've just been in formed that the Kansas City Kid was eaten by a
little dog... HAHAHHA YO QUERIO KANSAS CITY...
Roxx - That was lame... even for you JT.
Ken War is slowly getting up. He looks over and sees The Raging One is down.
He gets up and just stumbles away. Who knows where War is going... The
Raging One is now starting to move. He has no clue where he is at. Ken War
is now headed AWAY from everyone else. WAIT!!! THERE IS A NET ON THE
GROUND!!! WAR DOESNT SEE IT!!!! HE STEPS INTO THE NET!!! IT SNAGS HIM AND HE
IS HANGING FROM THE CEILING TRAPPED INSIDE OF A NET!!! AND MAD MAX EMERGES
FROM THE TOP FLOOR OF THE MALL!!!! He slides down the cord holding up the
net. He slides down to War. He pulls out a knife and starts cutting the
cord!!! He cuts it through!!!!!! WAR AND MAX ARE FALLING!!! WAIT!!! MAD MAX
HAS AN UMBRELLA!!!! HE OPENS IT UP AND HE SOFTLY LANDS... WAR HITS HARD...
Mad Max is yelling for a refree. He makes a cover!! 1... 2... .3!!!
Eliminated #6 - Ken War
GP - Ken War is now out!!! We are down to just 5 men!!!
Roxx - And to be honest... I only think that Chris Anthony or Mad Max can
win this thing.
JT - I have to agree with ya.
GP - We've just received word that Joey Rappoport is in fair condition at
the local hospital... And apparently Dane Wilt is being taken to that same
hospital... Also... KC Kid is there getting his face repaired from that FIRE
Remaining: Mad Max, The Raging One, Chris Anthony, Phelen Kell, and Zombie
GP - Ken War is being strecthered out of here. I don't know his condition. I
do know that EVERYONE who has been eliminated is injured except for The
JT - Who just walked away...
Roxx - Don't make me say his damn name.
Mad Max is now heading for The Raging One. The Raging One saw what happened
with Ken War and he is trying to run from Mad Max... MAD MAX PULLS A BOWLING
BALL FROM HIS SHOPPING BAG!!! HE ROLLS IT... It hits The Raging One in the
feet. It trips him up... He goes flying down face first to the floor. Mad
Max is making his way towards him.
GP - The Raging One is in deep trouble.
Chris Anthony is sorting through the glass trying to get to Phelen Kell.
What he doesn't know is that sneaking up from behind is Zombie... Zombie
apparently made his way inside an applicance store. He has a small
Television set. He doesn't even let Anthony know he is there. He smashes the
TV over Anthony's head. Anthony goes down to the floor. He is out... Zombie
doesn't care about Anthony. He goes after Kell!!! He pulls Kell up from the
glass. He gives the signal... FOR THE ZOMBIEPLEX!!!! HE NAILS IT!!!! AND HE
GOES FOR A COVER!!!! 1... .2... .NO!!!!! Phelen Kell is the first person to
kick out of anything tonight!!! Zombie CAN NOT believe it. Zombie pulls Kell
up. He slings him into Ladies Foot Locker... There we see Neil Lutsky trying
on women's shoes... Zombie is so sickened by the sight... He drags Kell
out... He heads to IWO Store!!! He grabs a replica of the IWO World Title
and tries to make Kell eat it.
Zombie - YOU STOLE THIS FROM ME AND TONIGHT IM GONNA GET IT BACK YOU SON OF
Kell spits as Zombie tries forcing the belt into his mouth.
GP - Zombie is obsessed with the world title. He honestly has lost his ever
JT - He has the right attitude to win this thing. It seems that nothing can
Roxx - Well... Mad Max hasn't even been HIT yet!!!
Zombie is now choking Phelen Kell with a Hostile Youth t-shirt. Kell's face
is turning blue. A ref has come over to check to see if Kell can continue...
KELL ELBOWS ZOMBIE IN THE STOMACH!!! AGAIN!!! AGAIN!!! Finally Zombie lets
go of the t-shirt... Kell shoves Zombie back over the check out counter..
Kell grabs a replica of BAT!!!! HE THROWS it down onto Zombie. Too bad it
was a PLASTIC replica. He is looking around. He grabs the NEW IWO Nintendo
64 Video Game... And slings it down on Zombie.
Phelen Kell - You want to be the DAMN center of attention in the IWO!?!?!
Kell grabs a t-shirt wrack and slings it down on Zombie.. He is destroying
the store... Putting EVERYTHING on Zombie!!!
GP - Zombie is BURIED in IWO stuff!!!
Phelen Kell walk out of the IWO store and heads back over to Chris Anthony.
Anthony is slowly getting up. Kell grabs some glass and JABS Anthony with
it!!! Anthony is now cut and so is Kell's hand... Kell is now driving the
glass into Anthony's face... Anthony is yelling out.
JT - Now Phelen Kell has this thing in his hands.
Roxx - He is good.
Mad Max has The Raging One tied up to a pole. He is putting what appears to
be a dress on him. He now pulls out a Shania Twain CD.
Mad Max - YOU BROKE THIS!??! YOU AND WAR!!??! Well WAR has paid the PRICE..
NOW YOU WILL!!!
Mad Max shoves the CD into The Raging One's face.
Mad Max - NOW SING OR DIE!!!
The Raging One is gagged therefore HE CAN NOT sing. Mad Max is pissed. He
pulls out the lava lamp he got at Spencers and SMASHES it over The Raging
One's face. The Raging One is bleeding... . And it is in a neon green
color... It is trickling from his head.
JT - Someone cut the lights out so we can see him glow in the dark!!!
Roxx - heh...
Mad Max takes his knife and cuts the rope. The Raging One falls face first
to the floor. He is out cold. Mad Max is trying to get him to get up but he
can't do it. Mad Max pulls The Raging One up... PILEDRIVER!!! Mad Max goes
back to his shopping bag... He pulls what appears to be A CAT!!!!! A LIVE CAT!!!
JT - He is the one that let all the animals out of the pet shop!!! He is the
one that caused that cat to get creamed by the lawn mower!!!
Mad Max shoves the cat into The Raging One's face..
Mad Max - THIS IS THE ONLY PUSSY YOULL BE GETTING ANYTIME SOON!!!
Mad Max sets the cat down. It starts clawing the Raging One in the face.
Finally... it stops... Mad Max now has what appears to be... ..SOME SCISSORS!!!
Mad Max - NO MORE PUSSY FOR YOU!!!
Mad Max grabs the cat and throws it through a glass window into the chinese
food shop. Immediately the owner cooks the cat and serves it as the special
of the day. Mad Max is going to cut of The Raging One's wang... NO!!! He
stops... HE CUTS THE DRESS OFF OF HIM!!!
GP - I'm sorry guys but I think Mad Max should be out of this thing and into
a damn nut house.
JT - He just wants his dress back!!!
Mad Max cuts the dress off and puts it back in his shopping bag. He rolls
The Raging One over and makes a cover... 1... 2... 3
Eliminated #7 - The Raging One
GP - FOUR MEN LEFT!!!
Mad Max - Now to go find some new friends...
Mad Max skips off.
Roxx - I hope I never have to meet him.
GP - I'll make sure I invite him out the next time you are here. Whenever
the hell you show up.
Roxx - I show up when I'm damn well good and ready.
JT - They force me to show up.
Roxx - AWWWW!!!
Blood is everywhere as Chris Anthony's wounds get even deeper. Phelen Kell
pulls Anthony up and slings him into the guardrail of the mall. Anthony goes
over but luckily he holds on. Kell does not see this. He thinks Anthony fell
to the bottom floor. Kell walks back over to where Zombie is.
GP - I don't see how Chris Anthony has the power to hold himself up there.
He is bleeding so bad.
JT - I'm surprised he hasn't lost all of his blood after that.
Roxx - Phelen Kell is one crazy mother...
Phelen Kell is trying to find Zombie in the IWO mess. HE CANT!!!! Where did
Zombie go!?! Kell is looking around. He has no clue where he went to. Kell
starts out looking for him.
Mad Max is down on the bottom floor. He looks up and sees Anthony hanging
from the rail. He yells out.
Mad Max - HOLD ON FRIEND!!! I'll SAVE YOU!!!
Mad Max pulls out a grappling hook from his bag of goodies. He TRIES
thorwing it up to Anthony. Luckily it doesn't grab him. Anthony is yelling
at him to stop.
Mad Max pulls the rope in, apparently to try it again.
GP - I've honestly never seen him like that.
JT - I haven't either. Someone must have put crack in his wheaties this morning.
Roxx - Crack isn't so bad after a while. Especially female asses.
GP - sigh...
Phelen Kell is now searching through ALL the stores for Zombie... He heads
into what appears to be one of those KINKY stores. WAIT!!!! ZOMBIE IS
THERE!!!! HE HAS A CHAIN!!!! KELL DOESNT SEE HIM!!! HE SMACKS HIM WITH THE
CHAIN!!!! Kell is out like a light.. ZOMBIE IS DRESSED IN LEATHER!!!!! He
grabs Kell and chains him up to the wall. He exposes Kell's bare chest.
Zombie puts on a leather black mask and grabs a whip!!!!
Zombie - I WILL DOMINATE YOU!!!
JT - Ok... I'm not into this. Please stop now.
Roxx - Who does Zombie think he is? The Vietnam Veteran???
GP - He is just trying to humilate Kell. Kell is going to be really pissed
Zombie is whipping Kell with the whip right in the chest. Blood is now
coming from the welps.
Zombie - WHOS YA DADDY BITCH!?!?
Zombie - I said WHOS YA DADDY!!!
JT - I never knew dominatrax stores were allowed in Minnesota.
Roxx - I guess they are.
Zombie lets Kell down from the wall. Kell falls to the floor.
Zombie - Kiss my BOOT... YOU ARE MY SLAVE!!!
Zombie goes over and grabs a dog collar. He places the dog collar around the
neck of Phelen Kell...
Zombie - YOU ARE MY DOG!!! BARK!!!
KELL HEADBUTTS ZOMBIE IN THE GROIN!!! Zombie clutches himself and falls to
the floor. Phelen Kell is getting some energy. He looks at his chest and
sees the welps... WAIT!!! WHAT THE HELL!?!??!?! IT IS ZOMBIE!??!?!
Zombie - HAHA!!! You idiot... That was my twin brother LOUIS!!!
The REAL Zombie charges at Kell... Kell manages to move out of the way.
Zombie goes flying into some leather outfits. He lands right on a sex toy.
Zombie gets up. He is screaming... Kell grabs a chain. He starts swinging it
around. Zombie can't get close enough to Kell. Kell is slowly backing out of
the weird freaky store. Zombie is really pissed.
GP - If Zombie ever gets his hands on Kell... It won't be pretty.
JT - Especially after Kell took out his twin brother Louis.
Kell is out into the main part of the mall. He is still swinging the chain
not allowing Zombie to get close to him. Kell is backing slowly toward the
same rail that Anthony is STILL hanging from... He is at that RAIL!!! HE IS
LURING ZOMBIE TO THE RAIL!!!! OH MY GOD!!! MAD MAX JUST THREW HIS GRAPPLING
HOOK AND IT CAUGHT ZOMBIE!!! MAD MAX JERKS AND ZOMBIE GOES FLYING DOWN TO
THE BOTTOM PART OF THE MALL!!!!
GP - Zombie needs help!!!
JT - Well atleast Mad Max finally hooked something with that damn thing. I
was beginning to think he never would.
Mad Max looks down at the fallen Zombie. He removes his grappling hook and
looks back up at Anthony.
Mad Max - I'm sorry!!! I'll try harder next time!!!
Chris Anthony - NO!!! THATS OK!!!
Phelen Kell walks over to Anthony. He waves down to him.
Chris Anthony - WHAT DO YOU WANT!?
Phelen Kell - BYE BYE NOW!!!
Kell smashes Anthony hands... He has to let go... He drops on top of
Zombie... A refree nearby makes the count... 1..2... .3
Eliminated #8 - Zombie
GP - THREE MEN REMAIN!!!
JT - I can't believe Zombie is out!!!
Mad Max looks at the fallen Anthony. He shakes his head.. He pulls Anthony
up and shoves him back down HARD to the floor.
Mad Max - You aren't a good friend...
Mad Max reaches into his shopping bag and pulls out...
GP - OH MY GOD!!!
JT - EWWWWWWW!!!!
Roxx - I haven't seen one of those in a long time.
Mad Max has what appears to be a spiked sex toy. He starts clubing Anthony
with it. Anthony is already out so it really doesn't matter. Anthony is now
a bloody mess. Blood is pouring from his back... In those spike marks the
spiked sex toy has left. Phelen Kell is watching all thise from above. He
Phelen Kell - HEY dumb ass.. Why don't you just pin him so we can fight it
out for the world title?
Mad Max stops the clubing and looks up at Phelen Kell.
Mad Max - YOU DONT TELL US WHAT TO DO!!!
Mad Max pulls Anthony up... POWERBOMB onto the mall floor... Mad Max goes
for the cover... .1... .2... .3
Eliminated #9 - Chris Anthony
GP - Finally... It is down to Mad Max and Phelen Kell for the IWO World Title!!!
JT - Two of the most insane people I've seen in a long time.
Roxx - I'm afraid to be here in the arena with these two fighting it out.
There is no telling what they are going to do to that mall or each other!!!
Mad Max is now looking up at Phelen Kell laughing... Kell runs to the
escalator to go down... Mad Max runs to the escalator to go up. Max goes
up... Kell goes down... THEY ARE STUPID!!! Kell is now on the bottom.. Max
is on the top... Max looks down at Kell and smiles... He pulls out a remote
control from his shopping bag.
Mad Max - BOMBS AWAY!!!
A small remote control airplane comes flying down right at Kell. Kell ducks
it... Mad Max moves the airplane around so that it goes right back at Kell.
It nails Kell in the back of the head. Kell goes down. Mad Max drops the
remote control.. He pulls out another one... IT IS A REMOTE CONTROL TANK!!!
It is now driving right for Kell. The tank gets to Kell... It tries to run
him over... But it can't... Kell is pissed. He grabs the tank and destroys
it... Mad Max is mad.
Mad Max - You hurt OUR toys now WE hurt you.
Phelen Kell looks up at Mad Max and yells.
Phelen Kell - WHO THE FUCK IS WE!!!
Mad Max - I'll show you WE!!!
Mad Max goes back down the escalators. Phelen is waiting for him though.
Kell hits the stop button!!! Mad Max is still running!!!! He goes FLYING OFF
THE ESCALATOR TO THE MALL FLOOR!!! Kell starts stomping away on Mad Max. He
throws whats left of the tank onto Mad Max. He goes for a cover...
GP - This is it!!!
1... .2... NO!!!! MAD MAX KICKED OUT!!!
JT - He just fell down the damn escalators. How could he kick out of that one?
Roxx - There really isn't a way. He is just... INSANE!!!
Phelen Kell can't believe it. He gets up and pulls Mad Max up. He is headed
to the fountain!!! He shoves Mad Max's head into the fountain... He is going
to drown him!!! Mad Max is being drowned!!! The refree is over to check on
him.. He raises his hand... it drops... he raises it again.. it drops... and
again... NO!!! MAD MAX WITH A MULE KICK TO THE GROIN OF PHELEN KELL!!!
GP - How many times will he be hit in the groin tonight!?!?
Kell is down... Mad Max's face is all wet. He looks down at Kell.. He pulls
Kell up and... THROWS HIM INTO THE FOUNTAIN!!! Mad Max is walking away?!?!
JT - Just where the hell is the freak going now?
Mad Max has made his way into Radio Shack. He has some wires in his hands.
He heads out of the store. The wires are revealed to be extension cords. He
finds an outlet in the mall. He plugs one end into the outlet. He is taking
the other end... TO THE FOUNTAIN WHERE KELL IS!!!!!
GP - If he puts that thing into the fountain... Kell will be TOAST!!!
JT - FRIED KELL!!!
Roxx - I'd like mashed potatos with that!!!
GP - You two are sick.
Mad Max has made his way to the fountain. He is about to put the extension
cord into the fountain... WAIT!!!! THE CORD IS A FEW FEET SHORT!!! IT WILL
NOT REACH!!!! MAD MAX IS PISSED... HE RIPS THE CORD OUT OF THE OUTLET... He
pulls Kell from the fountain and starts choking him with the extension cord.
Kell IS ALIVE!!!!! HE GRABS MAD MAX BY THE THROAT and shoves him away. Kell
removes the extension cord from around his neck and stops whipping Mad Max
GP - I do not see how Phelen Kell is still alive.
JT - It is called LUCK!!!
Kell ties the extension cord around the neck of Mad Max... He starts..
DRAGGING HIM UP THE ESCALATOR BY THE ROPE!!! MAD MAX IS YELLING OUT IN
PAIN!!!!! They are to the top of the escalator. Kell continues to drag Max.
He is apparently going to the elevator!!! NO!!! Mad Max grabs the guardrail.
Kell can't pull Max away from it!!! Max is yelling out as he tries to keep
Kell from pulling him. Max is reaching in his pocket... His other hand is
still holding on. He pulls out his knife... He cuts the extension cord... It
sends Kell flying down to the floor.
Roxx - What the hell is going to happen now...
Mad Max gets up. He goes over and grabs Kell... He pulls Kell up and slams
him into the elevator door. He hits the button... The elevator opens up...
Mad Max shoves Kell into it... Mad Max goes into the elevator and hits the
stop button... He manages to escape the elevator before the door closes...
Kell is just trapped in the elevator!!!
GP - What is Mad Max going to do now!?!
Mad Max runs off... Our cameras are trying to keep up with him. He is going
up to the VERY top level... He is headed to where the elevator comes up...
He looks down... He sees the top of the elevator on the 2nd floor... HE
LEAPS DOWN ON TOP OF THE ELEVATOR!!!! It makes a funny noise... . Mad Max
pulls out some wire cutters!!!!
JT - WHERE THE HELL DID HE GET THOSE!?!?
He cuts the first cable holding up the elevator... It gives a little... He
cuts the second the cable... IT IS HANGING BY ONE CABLE!!! HE CUTS THE OTHER
CABLE... . THEY GO CRASHING!!!! KELL IS INSIDE!!!!! MAD MAX IS ON TOP!!!! THE
ELEVATOR CRASHES TO THE MALL FLOOR... . A pile of elevator destruction covers
both men... Three refrees are looking around trying to figure out what to do.
GP - OH MY GOD!!!
Roxx - NO ONE will be the champion!!! GIVE THE BELT TO ME!!!
JT - NO ME!!!
Roxx - ME DAMN IT!!!!
JT - FUCK YOU ROXX!!!
(The scene cuts back to the arena. JT shoves Teddy Roxx... Roxx shoves JT
back... THEY START BRAWLING!!! JT spears Roxx over the announcers table to
the floor of the arena!!! JT starts punching away on Roxx!!!!)
GP - DAMN IT!!!! I KNEW THEY COULDNT MAKE IT TOGETHER OUT HERE!!!
(The scene cuts back to the mall.)
No one has been heard from yet. WAIT!!!! THE PILE IS MOVING!!!! PHELEN
KELL!!!! THE PHOENIX!!!!! HE HAS RISEN UP FROM THE ASHES!!!! HE REACHES DOWN
IN THE PILE!!! He pulls Mad Max up... DDT INTO THE ELEVATOR DESTRUCTION
PILE!!!! HE MAKES A COVER!!!! 1!!!!!!!2!!!!!!!!!3!!!! NEW WORLD CHAMPION!!!!!
Winner and TWO TIME IWO World Champion - Phelen Kell
GP - Phelen Kell did it again!!!! And this had to be the hardest fought
match in his entire career!!! I've never seen anything quite like what we
just saw. And the Mall of America will NEVER be the same. Fans... We have to
go... JT and Teddy Roxx are being broken up by IWO security guards here in
the arena... Lets take you back to the mall and show you celebration of
(Dane Wilt... in a neck brace has made his way back to the mall... Along
with The Beverly Hills Bruisers... They are all celebrating with Kell... He
is holding the IWO Title belt up high!!! IT IS ZOMBIE!!!!! HE HAS A LIFE
SIZE CAR IN THE MALL!!! HE IS SPEEDING TOWARDS KELL, WILT, AND THE
BRUISERS!!! THEY START RUNNING!!!! OH MY GOD!!! THE CAR GOES CRASHING INTO
THE WALL OF THE MALL!!!!! ZOMBIE COULD BE DEAD!!!!! MAD MAX IS NOW COMING UP
FROM THE MESS!!!! OH DEAR LORD!!! APPARENTLY EARLIER HE WENT TO THE TNT
STORE!!! HE HAS SOME DYNAMITE!!!! HE LIGHTS IT!!! IT HAS A HELL OF A LONG
STRING!!! MAD MAX STARTS RUNNING OUT OF THE MALL... SO DOES EVERYONE ELSE!!!
ZOMBIE IS TRYING TO CRAWL AWAY... .. DANE WILT PULLS THE FIRE ALARM!!!! IT
MAY BE TOO LATE!!!!! EVERY IWO SUPERSTAR IS OUTSIDE OF THE MALL... THEY ARE
STILL RUNNING... ... .
OOOOOOOOOO- (deep breath)-
WHEN JOHN AND JAMIE NEGOTIATED THE IWO
JOHN HAD ONE CONDITION FOR HIM TO JOIN
MAKE ONE PPV... IN SEPTEMBER... COMPLETELY PSYCHOTIC
WELL, JOHN IS GONE... .
BUT WE'RE STILL GONNA F*CKING DO IT ANYWAY!!
Live from the American West Arena in Phoenix, AZ
SEPTEMBER 19TH, 1999
THE NAME SAYS IT ALL
Phelen Kell -c- v. Dane Wilt
Outcasts v. BHB -c-
And much much more... .
""All your base are belong to Gust!""
- Raging Dead